Disclaimer: Ranma 1/2 is the product of Rumiko Takahashi and Viz Video. This piece of fan fiction is for free distribution.

 

Training Trip

By Michael Fetter

 

 

      "Is this it?" Akane set her pack down and looked about the small clearing she and Ranma would be training in. It wasn't as far as most of Ranma's training places, in fact it was about a ten minute walk from the train station.

      Ranma dropped his pack as well and looked about the pathetic strip of vegetation they would be spending a week in. "Yep."

      "Doesn't seem like such a great training spot, Ranma. You could've gotten better training in the dojo." Akane noted with some show of disgust as she scrapped the bottom of her shoe with a twig to free herself of a pound of mud and moss.

      Snorting, Ranma began to unpack his things. "Shows what you know, tomboy. We're here on special training."

      The twig in her hand snapped as Akane began to growl. "Ranma . . ."

      "Uh, let's set up the tents before it gets dark." He suggested quickly and tried to make himself busy with his tent.

      "Fine." Akane spat back and ripped open her pack. They passed the next ten minutes in silence, setting up tents, readying fire wood, and changing into some training clothes. "So what kind of training are we out here to do again?"

      Waving away the question, Ranma sat down and began to meditate with his hands together and staring up at the sky. "Tomorrow. Let's get things set up and make dinner right now."

      "Jerk." Akane humphed and sat down to wait. By the time Ranma was finished Akane had begun to prepare their dinner. He stood up and stretched out his back, worked out some joints, and began to throw a group of half-hazard and choppy strikes. "You could've gone off for a few hours to train before dinner Ranma."

      Jogging in place. "Nah, I'm, uh, tired after the hike up."

      Smiling brightly, Akane presented a platter of her finest cooking. At least she thought so. "Here, this should make you feel better then."

Ranma cracked his neck again and sat down, shaking out his wrists. "All right. Give it to me."

      Nonplused, Akane handed it over and watched him take one bite and collapse before even swallowing. Watching him lie on the ground for about five minutes, Akane started to get angry. "If you don't like it then don't eat it!" she snapped at him. It seemed to wake the pig-tailed boy up.

      Another deep breathe, Ranma scooped in another bite, eating another as quickly as he could. His face turned a myriad of unnatural colors before deciding on a deathly green with black spots.

      Blinking, Akane leaned over and watched him shovel another bite into his mouth. "Ranma, what are you doing?"

      Ranma's teeth clicked together and his eyes were looking in different directions but somehow he was able to get out, "E-Eating your c-c-coo-cooking."

      Ranma extended the empty bowl for her.

      Taking the bowl, Akane stared at it, seeing the bottom for the first time. A smile spread across her face as Akane looked back up to her fiance. "You want more? Really?"

      Grabbing his head and forcing it not to shake, Ranma indicated that he did. With another bowl full, Ranma put himself to it though he looked more prepared to return what he'd already ingested. 

      Something made Akane notice the way Ranma's skin seemed to sag and turn cold and gray. "Enough already, Ranma. You look like you're going to die."

      Twitching on the ground, Ranma attempted to direct his hand holding the spoon away from the fire and into his mouth. "I'm f-f-f-fi-fi-fi-fi . ."

      The night passed away and each went to their tents for sleep. Akane hopping in while Ranma staggered and stumbled, dragging one useless leg behind him.

      There were no birds to chirp or insects to twitter as the night went on. Sane creatures had abandoned the area hours ago.

      Yawning, Akane stretched out her body as she woke up from a very pleasant dream. She hadn't gone to bed mad like usual, but very proud of herself. Ranma had actually eaten all of her cooking without saying one insulting thing about it. Outside of her tent, Akane made sure to put on her shoes before stepping on the red mold. There was a noticeable lack of activity this morning considering it was supposed to be a training trip. "Where's Ranma?" she wondered aloud.

      A loud moan erupted from the other tent.

      Curious, Akane tapped on the cloth flap. "Ranma? Are you up yet?" All she got back was another loud moan and a rustle of a sleeping bag. He was probably still asleep, she thought. And the baka had wanted to come out here to train! Readying herself for whatever she might see in the tent, Akane stepped in. "Ranma! What happened?!"

      Ranma slowly rolled over onto his back to show Akane the gray, clammy skin all over his body. "P-P-Poison. Toxic sludge."

      Placing a hand over her mouth in surprise, Akane moved in closer to examine Ranma. "Oh my god! What kind of monster would feed you poison?"

      ". . ."

      "No matter." Akane stood up and threw her arm forward in a dramatic pose. "It's a good thing I'm here to take care of you." From nowhere a nurse's outfit appeared over Akane's body and she turned to leave the tent. "Give me a second and I'll be right back with the first aid kit. Then I'll get to work on breakfast!"

 

One week later . . .

 

      Furinkan had been quiet during the absence of its two most popular students and trouble-makers. A group of Ranma and Akane's friends started to gather before school to share rumors they heard about the couple.

      Sayuri asked her friend Yuka. "Have you seen Ranma? He just got back from some sort of intensive training in the mountains with Akane."

      Nodding, Yuka looked over her shoulder to be sure no one was listening in on them. "I heard it was pretty close to a hospital actually. Ranma must have been expecting to get hurt."

      Diasuke whistled at the idea. "That must have been quite a training regime."

      "Totally." Yuka nodded.

      "You guys!" Hiroshi called out, waving his arms as he made his way through the morning crowd in front of the school. "I just saw Ranma get into a fight!"

      Sayuri and Yuka waited for the big news. When Hiroshi didn't continue, Diasuke got annoyed. "So? He always gets into fights."

      "Not like this." Hiroshi shook his head. "Kodachi used her drugs and he just stood there like it was just normal air."

      Looking shocked at her friend, Sayuri gripped Yuka's arm. "Do you think he can go without breathing for a long time or something?"

      "Maybe he was immunizing his body to the effects of drugs and poisons." Yuka suggested while thinking over what it must take to stand up against the Black Rose's paralysis drugs.

      Hiroshi continued. "Not only that, but his body . ."

      "What?" Diasuke asked, unable to handle the suspense.

      "It's like his body didn't want to bleed." Hiroshi exclaimed, catching the attention of other students. Diasuke and the girls frowned. Perhaps thinking he was a bento short of a picnic. "I swear! That Ryouga guy showed up and threw Ranma through a few walls and the cuts on Ranma's body seemed to refuse to bleed and tried to heal themselves as quickly as possible."

      "Wow." Diasuke looked to his hands like they could help him grasp this horrible knowledge. "Whatever sort of sick and twisted training he did to get his body like that must have been terrifying."

      The others could only nod at his assessment.

 

 

The End

*     *      *

 

      Hey, with all of Ranma's other absurd training ideas, why not?

 

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Ja ne.