This story is about my great uncle, James L. Bailey. Of all his brothers and sisters, Uncle Jim with the most emotive and effusive. He loved telling stories more than any of the others. I knew, when I was listening to this story some 40 years ago, that I was in the presence of a great storyteller who was telling a wonderful story. I have never written it down before now, but I can still remember the names of the individuals he mentioned, and I can remember the names and models of the tractors he was talking about. Uncle Jim had his own unique grammar and metaphors, but the years have erased some of them from my memory. I have tried to include only a sampling here.
The story begins on a truly sweltering day in the early 1960s. It was Sunday, I had just gotten out of the Brethren Church and I walked down to the Carleton Caf� for a Pepsi. The swamp cooler was on. The humidity outdoors was so high the swamp cooler couldn't evaporate any water to cool the caf�. But it did succeed in making a good deal of noise and in making a humid breeze.
I was already working on my Pepsi when Uncle Jim came in. He had not been to church but he was wearing his teeth and new overalls, as it was Sunday. Uncle Jim wore Key brand bib overalls. He was fairly unique in Carleton for this. Key overalls had a green mounted zipper on the chest pocket, right in the middle the chest. The zipper was sown in diagonally so the pocket was higher on one side than the other. Nowadays that would be a trademarked symbol, but I don't suppose it was then. He kept his tobacco, his rolling paper and a yellow pencil in this chest pocket. Key overalls were wide-legged and Uncle Jim had skinny, bird-like legs. With his skinny legs and the wide pant legs on his overalls, I sometimes wondered if his pant legs flapping in the wind tormented him on windy days.
I was sitting at the counter, but when Uncle Jim came in he motioned me over to a booth. He spent the first few minutes of our time together grilling me about relatives: the recent news about my dad, my grandfather, my mom. He always began with a grilling about family members. Shirley brought Jim's iced tea in a big plastic glass. Jim liked lots of sugar. While he was talking he held his spoon over the iced tea and started to pour some sugar into the spoon. But, as usual, he seemed to forget he was pouring sugar while he was talking, and sugar filled his spoon and then overflowed into the iced tea for a very long time. He easily poured in half a cup of sugar. I laughed at this but didn't make a comment. I always wondered whether it was really a consistent mistake, or whether he did it for show while maintaining a straight face.
After he stirred his iced tea he motioned me to lean over toward him so he could tell me something private. He whispered, "Now I have to watch what I say because there are men in here who own John Deere tractors. They would probably get upset with what I'm going to tell you. The Langs are sittin' just two benches behind us, and they live and die with them gall-darn John Deere tractors."
"Now, you know, your grandfather and me, and your Uncle Press, when he was farmin', and your dad, too, and my son, Russell -- we all had Case tractors for all these years. And, you know, Mr. J. I. Case, himself, sent your grandfather rings and sleeves for his blue CC Case so he could farm for the Second World War. And you know them Cases are hard pullin' tractors and they run forever. (It had lost any trace of blue long before my time, but Uncle Jim always called it blue.) Our family has known this ever since they come out with Case tractors and we quit horse farmin'."
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| Uncle Jim's Case looked like this one. |
He went on, "On the Fourth of July I went over to Bruning to the tractor pull. Men from around Bruning and some from Belvedere and Strang *had brought their tractors. At Bruning they had rigged up a big gall-darn sled for the tractors to pull. It was made of railroad ties held together with cables. Then the fellers from Bruning got in two long lines and the tractors had to pull the sled between the two lines of men. The men in the lines jumped on the sled as the tractor pulled it past them. As more and more men jumped on the sled, the tractor would either spin out and couldn't go no more, or the it would sputter and cough and finally lug down and die. Then they counted how many men the tractor pulled, and then that was the score for the tractor.
"Now I looked around and saw the Brunings had brought one of them brand new, great big, gall-darn John Deere tractors, Model 4010. You know the 4010 just came our and it's way bigger'n the John Deere 730. Gall-darn they're big tractors! I went up and stood by one, and the wheels was higher'n my head.
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| This is a John Deere 4010. |
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| This is a Case, Model L. |
"Will the tractors started a pullin' and men was jumpin' on the sled. The tractors was makin' it about half way down the line and they was either spinnin' their wheels and a diggin' in the dirt and couldn't pull no more, or else they was a luggin' down and makin smoke and a coughin' and dyin'. These was just ordinary tractors that pull three- or maybe four-bottom plows. But them gall-darned 4010 John Deeres could pull six- or eight-bottom plows or two big tandem discs. I was just feelin' sick a waitin' for one of them to pull. I was sure none of them little Cases could match 'em.
"And one other thing was really botherin' me while I was waitin'. They made everybody pull in third gear. Now most of them tractors only had four gears. Renny Stair's Model L Case has only got four gears. But them 4010 John Deeres' has six or eight gears, and they are still geared way down when they are pulling in third. But the other tractors, havin' only four gears, are damned near in road gear and they was a pullin' so fast that the guys were a havin' trouble jumpin' on the sled. So it wasn't fair for the older tractors. Anyhow, I couldn't see how Renny Stair's Model L Case had a chance.
"So pretty soon the Bruning boys brought up their monster John Deere, and I got right down toward the end of the line because I knew it was a gonna' pull a long way. Here it came and it didn't seem like it was workin' at all. It went past the place where the smaller tractors was coughin' and dyin' or spinnin' and diggin' and it wasn't even workin' hard. It pulled way past where the smaller tractors had been a pullin'. I had to look away for a while 'cause I was scared it was gonna' pull way farther'n I could even imagine. But, by damn, it eventually got to belchin' smoke and bellerin' deep, and then luggin' down and it died about three-quarters of the way through the line. So, I put a brick there, buy the line where it died, so I could remember how far it pulled.
"Then I got a big, gall-darned bellyache a waitin' for Renny Stair in his big Model L Case. I was a worryin' about us Case owners not bein' able to hold our heads up no more around Bruning, or even here in Carleton, with them dang Langs and their dadgum John Deeres.
"So, finally, here come Renny Stair. I started feelin' sick and I didn't think I was a gonna be able to watch. But Renny was our only hope. So, he got ready, and they started him, and he was comin' down the line, and the boys was jumpin on the sled, and I was sayin' a little prayer for Cases and for Renny Stair, and specially for his big old Model L. Pretty soon he come to where the big John Deere started belchin' black smoke and his Model L just kept on breathin' easy like it wasn't pullin' nothin'. I checked the sled and there was quite a few guys on already. And it just kept on a comin' and a comin', and it was still breathin' easy. Then it started getting close to where I put the brick, where the big John Deere had died. And Lordy, Lordy, it pulled past the brick and it just kept on pullin' without no trouble at all. And the boys kept a jumpin' on the sled behind the Model L and it kept pullin'. When it come past me the ground shook and the roar of the old engine was good; it was strong. It didn't slip or dig in. It didn't lug down or nothin'. And pretty soon all the guys, every last one of 'em, had jumped on the sled and there wasn't no more men left to jump on. And it was pullin' like a real champion without even blowin' smoke. Renny drove it around in a big circle, with all the guys on the sled behind him. Then he headed back down where the line was, and all the guys jumped off where they first jumped on, and he took it all the way back to the starting line.
"I hope to tell you I was happy about that! AND I KNEW, I KNEW, THE CASE TRACTORS HAD WON FOR AT LEAST ONE MORE YEAR. ONE MORE YEAR!!!
"Now don't tell the Langs, nor nobody else with John Deeres around here, that I told you this story. They might be feelin' pretty miserable about now. Besides that, if brains was gunpowder, them John Deere owners wouldn't have enough gunpowder to blow their noses."