ok! i will do english page.. somebody tell me i cannot speak english! i say that preposterous! i can speak that language anytime, anywhere.. so now i made this..

he want me to made something.. like a article about speaking english. so i tell him, "alright, i will make you a english page because what you think is more important than what i know.. i have to impress you because i want to be cool like you.. you english speaker bastard.."

so anyhow.. this will be pure english, so better get the fuck out of here if you aren't intellectually inclined like me.. you know me, smart and elegant.. i understood if you can't read well because you probably dumb.. click on this so you get out [click this].. ok, back to the subject.. i speak english ever since i was a baby boy.. it was once upon a time in my grade school.. YES, ladies and gentlemen, my grade school.. i love that school.. full of incandescent trees.. magical flower.. and bountiful dogs.. i love it.. everyday i speak english there with vivacity, aristocracy and monarchy.. that time i know many thing already.. 

OH NO! WAIT!

it was not once upon a time in my grade school!!! it was once upon a time in my kinder garden!! oh yes! i remembered it correctly.. the incandescent trees.. magical flower.. boun....... OH FUCKING SHIT! my head screwed down!!! i can not think straight anymore! i'm like bakla! not straight! god damn it!!

dammiT! but my point is, i speak english very early in the millenium.. i speak english on home, i speak english on school, i speak english on dog, i speak english on magtataho, i speak english anywhere! i breath the english language like rugby.. i addicted to it.. i also watch many cartoon like "rainbow bright" and "transformers".. i also learned english when i play mario brothers on family computer! very nice! i love mario, but i think luigi is bakla.. that is why i think green is for bakla.. its funny how i think.. i crack myself sidewards sometime..

then, when i reach grade school, i expanded my vocabularity and english more and more and more everyday! fanstastic! its outrageous! my teacher would sit besides me and speak to me in english manner.. i speak english manner very well also.. sometime she compete with me in english.. so i compete back! i win! because she walk away saying : "hay, tanginang bata to, wala nang pagasa!" ohow wow! will you look at that! i get teacher piss at me.. from that day on, she never speak to me again.. i become very good in class.. of course, english is my forte.. my class listens to me when i speak, everyone hold their breath when i speak, they only exhale when they laugh on me.. they laugh because they are jealous.. that is what my mom say.. she say : "anak, you are not dumb.. you are my special baby boy.. i love you, and when your friends laugh at you, they're just jealous because they're the fucking dumbasses.." then i say : "ok ma, i love you.."

eventually, i got through grade school like a breeze in the morning sun.. specially in english, i slice through it like butter knife in hot butter.. yes, i am one mean walking english machine.. because of that, i pass onto high school..

like father like son, so i say to you, like grade school, like high school! everyone was jealous from the start, because i gave a  very overwhelming introduction of my slef overflowing with very not shallow word.. this is what i say :

"greeting, my fellow classmates.. i am Eric.. my mama call me jed. i am 14 years old.. i come from ateneo grade school, so i dont want new student fucking with me because i will kick your ass.. i have right to be here, and you just new.. so fuck on.. anyway.. i like writing.. i plan to write book that will be so exuberant.. it will be so nice i will want to marry it.. and it will carry my exuberant offsprings also.. you know, i am very smart.. ever since grade school.. although i am no nerd.. i am still smarter than them.. i wonder why? so thats it.. i don't want to be friends with you if youre not like me.. i dont want stupid people up my ass.."

they sat quiet for some time.. but not for long! the fuckers were laughing like hyenas on a rainy monday morning.. but i know why.. because they are all stupid freaks.. no one even talk to me.. that is probably because they heed my warning.. i dont want stupid asses.. so i went past high school.. without stupid friends.. no one talk to me.. even teacher.. because i challenge them every year.. a english contest.. then i always win.. because i am good, DAMN GOOD..

so i graduate, and during graduation, i speak in front of my batch.. because i am considered guest speaker.. probably because all the other speaker are bad speaker.. they suck ass.. not like me, i break the ice.. specially in parties.. so i break ice in graduation also.. i get nick name "ice pick" because i break every barrier there is.. they all laugh at me again.. the whole batch, the teachers, the priest.. all of them.. all of the fuckers are jealous.. i just smile and shake their hand.. they want me to go to a place call "comedy.com" because i can be very effective..

so now i am college.. and you know what? english is very important because it will be a way to a brighter future.. very good eh? i know i am.. if you want more english article, just let me know.. i will make more  for you.. because again, what you think is more important that what i know..