Ones I like:

"Moral of the story here: tie your keys to your bra therefore you will not lose them." - Auto

"Let's hope they never find anybody on Mars. Think of what it would cost us in foreign aid."

"If a nine-year-old can find a dope pusher, why can't the FBI?"

"Money won't keep you happy but it will keep you comfortable while you're unhappy."

"A running mate is a husband who dared to talk back."

"If all the people who sleep in church were laid end to end, they'd be more comfortable."

"If you can't be right - be wrong at the top of your voice."

"An optimist is a fellow who believes that whatever happens, no matter how bad, it is for the best. The pessimist is the fellow to whom it happened."

"Walking isn't a lost art - one must, by some means, get to the garage."
From Friends:

"Feel the FUCKAGE!" quoth Ej.
Back to Mon's Page
Just some other quotes...
Please submit!
"Life is like a nude beach........And you're NOT going to see me naked." -Canadian Dave
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