Location: On Set| In Hollywood, California
Time: Monday April 11th | 3:46 PM

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'..Who Wants To Be An Olympic Hero?..'
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[ / ] We've all seen the show a million times, the show which gives you a million reasons to want to be a contestant, the show that sees people winning a million dollars. The show is 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?' and it has grown in popularity since it debuted some time ago. Well today we're going to see this show with just a tiny twist in the rules and the way the show goes. Today, our host is going to be none other than the True Icon of Professional Wrestling.. J-Dawg and our guest is none other than our favorite fly white guy, the guy with the who's the shizzall forizzall, B-Rad from the hit movie Malibu's Most Wanted. So now, without further adieu we take you to 'Who Wants TO Be An Olympic Hero?. The scene opens in a crowded, dim lighted studio. The glass floor is lit with blue lights and the studio audience is buzzing, most of them thinking this is a the normal Millionaire show. The lights fade on and then we can see J-Dawg, as most of the fans gasp in shock. Jay is wearing a black and white San Antonio Spurs throwback jersey with the hat to match it, and always his trusty 'My Struggle' necklace around his neck. Jay looks into the camera and begins to speak. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Yo what up.. it's ya boy, J-Dawg. I'm here to welcome you to 'da first enstallment of Who Wants To Be An Olympic Hero.. with my guest, 'da originator of 'da Malibu rap game, B-Rad. Yo B, say what up to 'da people at home dawg. "

[ / ] The camera then cuts to a shot of B-Rad (who really is Jamie Kennedy for those who don't know) who is also wearing a throwback and hat his is of the Philadelphia 76ers and is a red white and blue jersey. B-Rad, who is obviously nervous, begins to speak. [ \ ]

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Y.. Y.. Yo. Wha.. Wha.. What up ya'll? "

[ / ] A surprised expression shows up on Jay's face as he begins to sport a bit of a grin. He then begins to speak. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Yo man.. why you so nervous.. what's goin' on? "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Cos uhh.. I ain't never been on TV before dawg.. it's kinda' cool ya heard fa-sho ya know for real dawg.. "

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " AIGHT! 'Dat's enough, damn. Anyway.. you know 'da deal.. if you win you get a million dollars, aight? "

[ / ] B-Rad's face lights up [ \ ]

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Fa-real!? "

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Nah, but you do get these here chocolate gold medals.. "

[ / ] Jay holds up two gold medals made of chocolate, as B-Rad calms himself down and sadly speaks. [ \ ]

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Oh.. "

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Don't worry about it though, dawg. Let's get 'dis jumped off already, aight? Here go the first question... "

" If Kurt Angle Could Be One Thing In The World.. What Would It Be? "

A) A Wrestling Mat
B) A Gold Medal
C) An Eagle
D) A Toilet

[ / ] B-Rad stops and thinks about it for a second. He then responds. [ \ ]

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Hmm.. uhh, well yo dawg.. I think imma hafta go with C.. ya can never go wrong with C, ya heard me player! "

[ / ] Jay just shakes his head [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Anywayz.. ya wrong, dawg.. 'da answer ain't C.. it's D, and I'll tell you why. See Kurt Angle would wanna be a toilet, cos 'dat's the only way he gon' EVER get a piece of ass! C'mon man.. 'da dude think a condom is what you put on ya hamburger to make it taste good, feel me? "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " What are you talkin' about, homeslice? "

[ / ] Jay again, shakes his head almost embarrassed to be seen with this guy. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " I'm sayin' 'dat as much as Kurt Angle talk about girls.. at least I'm gettin' mine, ya know? [turns to the crowd] When was 'da last time ya'll saw Kurt Angle with a girl? "

[ / ] The whole crowd raises their hands and then Jay finishes his statement. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " That he wasn't related to.. "

[ / ] Half the crowd puts their hands down and then Jay continues. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " A REAL girl.. "

[ / ] The remaining members of the crowd put their hands down and Jay shakes his head and turns back to B-Rad. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " That's what I thought.. anyway, yo.. B-Rad.. even though you missed that question. this ain't ya average type of show. See instead of goin' up until you get the wrong answer.. you gotta get a certain ammount of questions right.. now, it's 10 questions, aight? You.. gotta get at least 7 of 'em right to get these medals, ya feel me? "

[ / ] B-Rad shakes his head a few times. [ \ ]

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " For shizzall.. forizzall.. my wizzall.. "

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " [sighs] Man.. just answer this next question and shut 'da fu.. [looks at camera] I mean hell up. Almost forgot this was a family show.. "

" Who Was Kurt Angle's First Love? "

A) His Hand
B) His Other Hand
C) Milk
D) His Queer As Folk Collection

[ / ] B-Rad seems to be concentrating very hard on this one, he seems determined to get this one right, but with so many probable answers it will not be an easy question to get right at all. [ \ ]

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Hmm... I think imma go wit'.. D, his queer as folk collection. Yeah, 'dat sound about right. 'Dat show is dope yo.. "

[ / ] Ding! Is the sound that's heard throughout the studio apparently B-Rad has gotten it right. Jay explains and he shakes his head in shame. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " B-Rad.. 'dat's the right answer.. yo, as a matter of fact they all right answers, and here's why. See it's no secret Kurt Angle get about as many girlfriends as Mr. Hanky from South Park.. so on those lonely nights of his.. he goes straight to usin' his hand, but no one man can use just one hand for that long. So Kurt moved on to his other hand, ya feel me? With 'dat hand, he did his thang, yo.. but eventually that hand got tired too.. so he went to milk, and trust me if you got anything up in ya brain you would not drink Kurt's milk.. you don't know WHAT could be in 'dat.. and last but not least.. my dude got a Queer As Folk video tape collection about as big as my throwback collection.. so best belee' 'dis dude ain't got a single problem gettin' down and dirty with otha' men.. but this Wednesday.. he ain't gon have to worry about missin' an episode of Queer As Folk.. cos quite frankly he gon' have alot of time on his hands when I put him out fa' good! "

[ / ] J-Dawg pauses and then begins to continue the game. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Aight, next question.. "

" How Would Kurt Angle Spend His Typical Saturday Night? "

A) Training For A Big Match
B) Having Sexual Relations With A Girl
C) Having Sexual Relations With Inanimate Objects
D) Having Sexual Relations With Himself And Two Men Named Bubba And Butch

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Now B-Rad.. there are a couple answers it could be, but you still have your Lifelines, and if you want to use one, feel free. "

[ / ] Jay pauses and then grins. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Ha.. listen to me soundin' all official and what not. "

[ / ] The camera then cuts back to B-Rad who apparently has come up with an answer. [ \ ]

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Uhh.. I think imma go with.. D. It just sounds like somethin' Kurt would do my nizzle.. "

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Dawg.. you givin' white boy thugs an even worse name.. just.. stop, aight? "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Don't be hatin'! "

[ / ] Jay just shakes his head and speaks. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Is that ya final answer, dawg? D? "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Fa-shizzie.. "

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " It's fa-sheezie.. not fa-shizzie.. anyway you got the answer right.. Kurt Angle can't get enough of himself.. or big dudes named Bubba and Butch. Although, B and C would've been great answers too. A wouldn't be worth it, because Kurt can train all he want for this match this Wednesday.. but it ain't gon help.. cos I'm comin for the win.. I'm comin for my third win and that's exactly what I'm gon' get.. period! "

[ / ] Jay pauses and then begins to speak again. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Aight.. so we've gone through three questions and you've got two out of the three right, now on to 'da next question. Check it out. "

" What Is Kurt Angle's Favorite Sport Other Than Wrestling? "

A) Football
B) Baseball
C) Basketball
D) Anything That Involves Ass-Slapping

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " By the way.. that Football means American football.. not that pansy ass stuff they play in the UK. I think the answer to this question is pretty obvious though. So B-Rad.. go ahead. "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Uhh.. yo, I think imma go wit C man.. cos you know how us hip hoppas love to play to ball, ya know what I'm sayin.. word up.. "

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " EHHH! Wrong.. man, you dumb as hell.. the answa' is D.. c'mon you know how Kurt Angle is.. but yo, here tha next question. "

" Who Was Kurt Angle's First Kiss? "

A) His Mom
B) Himself
C) Shane McMahon
D) Shane McMahon's Ass

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Uh.. I think imma go with D, dawg.. final answer.. "

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " D is correct! Good job, B-Rad.. fa-sho.. mad props on 'dat one man, ya heard? "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Man.. why you tryin' to act like me, huh? I mean.. I been watchin' you homeboy.. and you been copyin' my act, yo.. "

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Wha'chu say, PUNK!? "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " You heard me, foo! What.. what you want? You bettah' check yo'self befo' you wreck yo'self, punk! "

[ / ] Both men stand up and B-Rad begins to do a sort of Shane McMahon-like bounce from side to side trying to throw J-Dawg off his game, Jay just kinda shrugs him off. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Yo.. I gotta a better idea.. instead of me whoopin' yo ass.. in front of all these damn people.. how 'bout we cut this game.. and have ourselves a battle rap? "

[ / ] The crowd begins to light up as B-Rad looks around. [ \ ]

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Yo.. aight.. aight.. I'm down!! "

[ / ] Jay just shakes his head again. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Yo.. since this is MY show.. you go first.. "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Aight.. yo check this out son.. "

" I came onto this show
havin' no fun
I feel like a hot dog
and Cena be da bun!
I got questions wrong
I got questions right
then I got put into a mic battle fight
that ain't right
the time is night.
time to take a flight
cos I'm goin to Nitro Wednesday night
challenge me to rappin' cos you didn't wanna fight
you scared of B-Rad like.. like.. blind people scared of sight! "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Word! "

[ / ] J-Dawg and the crowd are giving a look as if to say 'What the hell was that?'. Jay then begins to speak. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Yo man.. that was terrible.. yo, was that even for real? Was that a pratice or somethin', dawg for real? Yo.. this is how you drop a real acapella flow! "

" Man, that was pathetic.. was that really a rhyme?
You lucky I didn't fight you.. you'd be a chalk outline!
Ya rhyme was as garbage as a Kurt Angle memorial
It's obvious you need help.. let me give you a tutorial
First, never battle a king of the rap game
Two, change ya name, that's what stoppin' ya fame
Three, you can't see me.. not even if I let you!
And by the way Kurt... you're gonna lose.. I bet you!
Cos you starin' into the eyes
of a man who wants his prize
the win is mine! You bettah realize!
Nothin' gettin in my way! Nitro is my chance!
B-Rad's rap was so lame.. it almost left me in a trance
That was pathetic.. I hope you didn't write it down
Kurt Angle is up top.. but soon he steppin down.
Handin' over the throne.. to a man who really deserves it
me J-Dawg.. heard the name? Yeah but who hasn't heard it?
Kurt Angle think he a man.. he more like a silly myth
This dude has had more men than Anna Nicole Smith!
Thinkin' he can battle me.. he'll never rattle me
So come on Kurt.. bring tha noise!
Cos Imma hang you up like some christmas toys!
Yo from that rap, you musta got ya stuff from B-Rad
Cos you the only dude with worse rhymes than he had
This Wednesday night.. stayin' undefeated is what I'll get!
You thought you was in trouble Kurt?
NOW YOU IN DEEP.. "

[ / ] Jay stops and the crowd finishes for him. John Cena then begins to speak. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Yeah.. now get off 'da stage, punk. "

[ ' Jamie Kennedy as.. ' B-Rad ] " Nah.. you gon' hafta make me! "

[ / ] B-Rad suddenly charges after Jay! J-Dawg kicks him in the gut, lifts him up! HERE COMES THE DAWGPOUND! WHAM! JAY HITS IT! The fans are going crazy as J-Dawg drops the chocolate medals on B-Rad as the scene fades. [ \ ]

[ / ] The Scene fades back open, backstage of the 'Who Want's To Be A Millionaire' set. J-Dawg is sitting in his dressing room, watching the television. He see's Kurt Angle on wCw TV. He is cutting a promo about their match this Wednesday. After watching it all, Jay flips the TV off and looks at the camera. [ \ ]

[ ' UrBaN LeGeNd' ' J-Dawg ] " Yo...Are you fa' real Kurt? Ya' start off ya' interview by telling Michael Cole he sucks? Dat' dude has more talent in his pinky then you got in ya' whole body! I mean fo'real dawg. Ya' say dat'cha never heard my name?!? Where da' hell you been dawg? Under a fuckin' rock? Everybody in da' Dubya See Dubya knows my name? I'm a damn legend in dis' industry. Ya' must not remember dat' ass-whoopin' I gave ya' back in da' old Dubya See Dubya...huh? Me and You fought, and I stroked ya' ass. Left ya' out cold. Don't remember dat' shit huh? Well, dis' Wednesday ya' 'bout to remember. I'ma leave ya' da' same way. Out cold in da' middle of da' ring. Just like I'ma leave dat' false frontin' Carlito Frito guy, or whateva' da' hell his name is. I'm gettin' tired of dat' dude. Claimin' he's somethin'. Dude best recognize. Anyway, back to you Kirk. Ya' sayin' I won't last a minute in da' ring wit'chu? Ha! Dawg, ya' need to go to da' docta' and get'cha self checked out. You can't possibly think dat'chu can hang with a legend of my caliber! You wont last thirty seconds with me dawg. No way could you. Snap my leg? Dawg, ya' couldn't even get me on my stomach to get ahold of my leg, let alone snap it. Ya' must think ya' tough huh? Beatin' up on a reporter?!? Michael Cole of all people. Ya' message didn't come through too clear. All I got from that beating of Michael Cole is, "Kirk Angel: Branded A Pussy". If ya' wanted to prove somethin', ya' could've atleast attacked somebody who could fight back. Not a lousy reporter. Get'cha act straight dawg. Cause if dat's da' best ya' got, dis' Wednesday ain't gonna be a pretty sight. "

[ / ] With that said, the scene fades black. Permanently. [ \ ]