[now im sure everyone knows korn are the most original band out there, yes?
wrong.
i found out the shocking truth about Korn's rolemodels, Kron. Read on, this is truly amazing.]
[ Ronathan Davies ]
The singer is a farmer named Ron Davies, and he works on a Korn field, in Bakersfield.
he is soooooooooooo sexay. see?
Ron mainly harvests Korn every year, and keeps animals on his farm to eat when times get hard.
His band are also quite famous, and tour around the world when there is nothing to do on Ron's farm.
His hobbies include artificially inseminating Bessie the cow, long walks, fox hunting,
and fucking dumb ron groupies senseless.
[ Donky ]
Donky plays the 2345 string guitar and is probably the cutest thing on Rons farm.
donkys hobbies include running from Fieldy, running from ron, and rolling in the hay.
I'll get a pic of Donky soon.
[ Fieldy ]
He calls one simply "Fieldy" because hes working on the Korn fields all the time,
planting Korn kernels, and violating donkys and cows. he also is a ballerina in his spare time.
He also got bessie pregnant.
which was bad.
so me and Evelyn ( a Kornboard regular) shot him repeatedly, tore off his limbs, and roasted them
over an open fire and eaten Fieldy.
and his breasts were very tender.
[ Fieldy JR. ]
this is the latest addition to Fieldy's children, Fieldy Jr,
just one of Fieldy's lovechildren on the farm.
Needless to say, bessie the cow is the mother.
Hes really cute, and I wanted to kill it, so i chased after it with a 5 piece knife set and it
hit me with its K-5.
I'll get it next time. [ Head Farm Boy ]
The other guy is called Head, because hes the "Head farm boy" as Ron says.
He spends his time sacrificing Fieldy's lovechildren with bessie the cow to the dark lord, Satan.
He pretends to Ron that the calves and lambs are simply going to market.
Head is a satanist. and he likes blood.
Head also plays the 2345 string, like Donky, and dreams of sacrificing Donky to Lucifer.
but dont tell donky. he doesnt know yet. [ ? ? ? ]
The other guys kind of quiet, and works on the machinery around Rons farm.
he doesnt have a nickname, because he doesnt talk. at all.
Nobody even knows his real name.
He likes drumming though. and paper.
The Introduction to kRon
