*****

You have stolen my heart, my sister, my bride;
you have stolen my heart
with one glance of your eyes,
with one jewel of your necklace.

- Song 4:9

*****

"So..." Luka smiled awkwardly and began picking at his fries.

"So..." Abby absentmindedly repeated his words. She licked her lips trying to think up a way to bring up what had exactly transpired the night before. The inklings of something that she had thought was long behind her. "About what was talked about last night," she muttered, not sure she wanted the words to be heard.

"Yeah," he cleared his throat, "last night."

"It was fun." She closed her eyes at her lame response.

"You mean other than the being fixed up part?" he said dryly. "Yeah, you could say that."

"True," Abby laughed. "But in their defense, I do have to say it was an excellent meal."

Luka nodded, with a smirk on his lips.

"Um, the reason I asked you out for lunch is," she hedged, trying to decide whether she should drop the whole matter. "I just got the feeling you wanted to say more, before...before we got interrupted."

He swallowed hard. Abby had never been this straightforward before. He studied her face -the warm brown eyes that squinted whenever she smiled, her amazing smile that could and would always light up a room - and realized how much she had changed, yet remained the same. "Uh," he stammered, realizing he had been staring at her for more than a few seconds. "I guess I wanted to...to say that...." His voice trailed off.

What had he wanted to say? He regretted the position he had put her in, when Jen and Stephen acted on his behalf? That they had realized and deciphered that somehow he had begun to see her as something more than a fling? He had moved on with his life and now he could see that he wanted to start his present and future with her?

All of these answers swirled around in his head, but none of them broached his lips.

"I'm sorry if I put you on the spot," she blurted out, feeling the tension rise between them. "Maybe I just read it wrong."

It was not a novelty. She had been wrong before. She had been wrong when she thought that Michael was her soulmate. She had been wrong to marry the jerk, whom she had put through school. Abby peered up, searching Luka's eyes and wondered if she had misread that soft glimmer in his eyes as something more.

"No," Luka whispered softly, grabbing her hand before she withdrew it from the diner table. "You weren't wrong."

His heart was pounding. He felt a thick lump develop in his throat as his mind raced to find the words to say to her - to express what he was feeling.

Abby felt the corners of her lips curl slightly, as his thumb caressed the back of her hand. Her heart leaped when he confirmed her suspicions. But what was it that she had seen. Was it just old feelings re-igniting? Were they falling back into something familiar?

"Abby, I've gone through a lot," he began slowly, "you know that." She nodded, remaining silent as he spoke. "And you were the first woman I had really begun to have any relationship with since Danjela," he admitted, recollecting the passion that had first sparked their almost doomed relationship. "It was a hard road we faced."

"We had our problems," she said, nodding in agreement. "We both were not in good places."

"And we used each other." He paused, and locked gazes with her. "Hurting each other," Luka sighed, knowing he had not been as invested in their relationship as he should have been.

"It went both ways," Abby said, able to read the guilt that flickered across his face. "Although, you were more frustrating that way." She smirked, trying to lighten the mood slightly.

Luka chuckled softly. "Well, you were stubborn."

"True."

"And I don't think I was really," he paused a moment, trying to find the words, "ready for anything so intense, that comes with any relationship."

"And I was a complete mess, with my Mom's stuff."

Luka squeezed her hand. It felt good to hold it. Her fingers were long and slender, and soft to the touch.

"But now we're here," he breathed. "And we're different people. I didn't know how strong my feelings remained until I watched you spiral down into that dark place and I was helpless to do anything..."

"Luka," she leaned in, something caught in her throat, "what are you saying?"

It sounded like the verge of a confession of something - words that she had not heard uttered since her first marriage.

He had not spoken those delicate, and in a way very minor words, yet indescribably hard to say. "I think I may have fallen in love with you."

When John answered the phone, Jing Mei had the sudden urge to call the whole thing off. She had quickly managed to come up with a lame excuse to avoid their meeting that she had set up. But instead, she heard her confirming their plans and informing him that she would be over after she had changed out of her scrubs.

Why? Why didn't I just cancel on him? These questios plagued her as she stood upon the doorsteps of the Carter residence. Her heart was pounding and her palms were sweaty. Jing Mei had thought she was going to pass out before she even rung the doorbell.

"Deb!" John smiled as he opened the door for her. "You...come in."

Jing Mei caught the hesitation, as he greeted her. What had he planned on saying? She glanced down at her clothes, which she had painstakingly chosen. She did not know what kind of outfit one would wear when they were going to reveal to their best friend that they were more than attracted to them. In fact, the correct words would be 'in love with'. After much deliberation, she chose a pale pink camisole and a comfortable black silk skirt. "Uh, thanks," she breathed, swallowing hard as she stepped past John.

"I didn't know we would be going out?"

"Oh, we're not," Jing Mei blurted out, now regretting her choice of outfit. "Do I look that overdressed?"

"No," John said dismissively. "It's just that you look really good. I mean, too good just to hang out."

"Oh," she said softly. "Uh, thanks?"

This was awkward as hell. And Jing Mei knew it was going to get even more awkward, as the night went on. Maybe this isn't the right time. Maybe I should do this a different night?

"Can I get you a drink?"

"Uh, sure," she said quickly. "A white wine please." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw John's surprised expression with her choice of drink.

Great, am I acting completely weird and insane? She wondered what John was thinking about. What was going on in his head. She was not acting herself, for obvious reasons; but of course he had no clue. If only he knew...

"So you want to hear the further chronicles of my grandmother's matchmaking attempts?"

"Sure," she said, laughing half-heartedly. "What did she do now?"

"Before work, I get 'the talk' from my grandmother, about how much I am messing up my love life. Of course in much more subtle terms," he laughed, with his back turned as he poured their drinks. "And I being the rebellious grandson, had to tell her to mind her own business. Of course, in much more subtle terms."

"And did she listen?" Jing Mei plastered a smile on her face, as he walked towards her with a glass of wine in an outstretch hand. She accepted the wine, taking a long sweet dry draught. The silky liquid coated her dry throat and calmed some of her nerves - or at least the psychological idea of the calming effects of alcohol had.

"No," he sighed exasperatingly. "Did you imagine she would?"

The right side of the corner of his mouth jerked slightly, in a warm mischievous smirk. He sat down beside her, turning his body in towards her, so that each had a leg curled in front of them.

"She is a pretty stubborn woman, or at least that's the impression she likes to give," she noted, with a genuine smile of her own. "But I can't hold that against her, when I know it comes from a good place."

"Do you think that way about your parents?" He arched one knowing brow.

"Well, it's a lot easier to see and feel, when you're not in the thick of it," she laughed. "Besides, my parents are twice the trouble your little grandmother is."

"Oh, don't let her hear you describe her in those words," John warned, leaning in conspiratorily. "Or it will be off," he made a cutting gesture across his throat, "with your head.

"Don't exaggerate, John." She pushed him playfully on the shoulder. "She's not that bad."

John seemed to pause a moment and then eye her suspiciously. "Now that you say that," he said thoughtfully. "I do have to wonder what is your secret?"

"Secret?" Her pitch raised slightly at the mention of the word. "What...what secret?" she laughed awkwardly, raising her wine glass to her lips.

"You seem to be the only one who can keep her in a genuinely good mood. Or at least, what qualifies as a good mood for her," he teased. "What is your secret?"

"I guess I'm just beyond charming," she replied haughtily, putting on heirs in an attempt to cover her utter relief that she would not have to explain herself just yet. "I mean, isn't that just obvious?"

"Well, that's a given," John said, rolling his eyes.

She watched as he relaxed, and leaned back into the couch cushions. He looked so different when he was away from work. At the hospital, he had always looked tense and worried. But at home, Jing Mei really felt she got to know John.

"So any ideas on how you're going to get Grandmere off your back, short of marrying a complete stranger?"

"So you like the idea!" John sat up with grin. "I thought it was a good one myself."

"W-what?" she coughed, as she was mid-drink. The liquid closed off her airway and threw her body into an involuntary coughing fit, as she gasped for breath. He moved in to clap her on the back, as if that would help her choking fit. "You're kidding, right?"

"Yes!" John had this bemused look on his face, as if he could not believe she actually thought he was that desperate. "So don't go dying on me yet, because I won't have anyone to tell these wild ideas that she drives me to consider."

"Right," she said raspily, still trying to catch her breath.

"You really think I would do something like that?" he laughed incredulously, still unconsciously rubbing her back. "After all of these years, I thought you knew me better than that."

"I do," she said defiantly, only to meet his teasing gaze, which danced with amusement.

"Good to know." He smiled softly.

Suddenly Jing Mei realized how close they were in proximity - and again her heart began to race. Her breathing became shallow and she could feel the heat emanating from his body. Searching his eyes, Jing Mei wondered if he felt anything - if this was a figment of her imagination. His gaze had softened and now seemed to be looking at her differently. And never once, did they leave hers.

This was how she dreamed it would be: The heat, the energy, the chemistry, the electricity filling the room, closing them off to everything and everyone in the room.

All I have to do is lean in...

How had everything fallen down to this one moment?

He had been ready to console a friend. John had planned several funny stories and anecdotes to cheer up Deb, who for all intensive purposes, had been coming over from a horrible day at work. But when she arrived on his doorstep, she was dressed...well, she was dressed. It was unexpected.

Things began awkwardly. She had requested a white wine, which is nothing unusual, in that he had seen her drink wine before; but she never took a drink at his house unless it was with a meal.

But then they fell into their usual banter as he filled her in on Gamma's latest antics. Things seemed to have been leveling out, and then when she was choking after his untimely joke, he automatically moved into help. There really wasn't anything to do - it was human nature to be concerned.

How did I get here, though?

He was staring into Deb's deep, dark eyes, and if he leaned in slightly they would be...

"Now it is about time!" Gamma exclaimed gruffly. "I thought you two would never wake up and smell the Columbian ground, brewing right in front of you."

John pulled away quickly. "Gamma!" He glanced out of the corner of his eye to see Deb close her eyes, he supposed in embarrassment. "What are you doing home so early?" he asked quickly, his heart still pounding from his grandmother's startling arrival.

She didn't seem to hear him.

"So you two finally realized how perfectly you fit!" She laboriously made her way down the one step into the sitting room. "I have to say John, I was worried about you," his grandmother chided. "But I can see you've come to your senses."

John groaned inwardly. This had to be the most embarrassing moment....No, that was tenth grade, involving Emiline Terrington. Though it definitely did rank right up there.

"As did you, young lady."

"Oh god." He heard Deb mutter under her breath.

She must have been mortified, John thought. And his intention that night had been to make her feel better, not worse. Good ole Gamma.

"Nothing was happening, Gamma," he protested. John guiltily glanced over at Deb, whose gaze met his before quickly averting them, as did he. "Deb just came over to hang out."

"Yes," Deb confirmed.

"Hang. Out." His grandmother said the words with disdain. "Hang out," she repeated, as if she was not quite grasping the concept.

"Yes," John said firmly. "It's what friends do."

"You should be doing something else with this young lady," she spat. "Other than hanging out. She is a young, intelligent woman and you wasting her time and yours is doing neither of you any favors."

John shook his head. Now it was his time to be mortified. He had never heard his grandmother talk so bluntly about his love life in front of people like this. Well, he had, but that was in hypothetical terms. Gamma has just gone over the bend. "Gamma!" he said harshly. "I don't think this is the time and the place."

It didn't seem to matter.

"You and she are friends and companions. She is from a well-bred family. A doctor nonetheless." She hobbled over to Deb and looked her straight in the eye. "And you, know very well I'm right," she challenged knowingly. "Don't you?"

John glanced over at Deb, wondering why his grandmother had seemed determined to be that pointed to her. Gamma and Deb seemed to always have some inside jokes or secrets, but now, it seemed to have gone further than that. His grandmother apparently felt she knew something about Deb that she had made a point to keep from him.

"John," Deb said breathlessly. "I-I..." She was trembling - shaking from all appearances.

"Gamma, you need to stop this."

"Well have you solved the dilemma which is your so called love life?" she asked pointedly.

"Yes." He turned and looked at her straight in the eye. "I have solved the dilemma of my love life, so you can stop meddling in it," he said determinedly. "Are you satisfied?"

"And what is that?" His grandmother stood there, as if doubtful that any resolution would satisfy.

"I'm giving it up."

"What?" Both Deb and his grandmother chimed together.

"I've given up on the whole world of romance."

They both seemed incredulous at the whole idea.

He had given it much thought, and though as much as he loved the company of a woman, he had realized that 'the right one' might not be out there. And as he had dwelt on that thought, the unusual revelation was that it didn't upset him as much as he thought it would. He had experienced romance and love and it hadn't turned out to be so great. It was time to focus on his career. He had even been considering doing some overseas humanitary aid stints.

"Well, th-that is absurd, John Truman Carter!" his grandmother sputtered. "It is unacceptable."

His grandmother seemed at a loss for words. She twisted this way and that before turning around and hobbling into the foyer and up the stairs. All the while, muttering how preposterous an idea it was.

"So, I know how she feels," he joked, turning around to face the stunned expression on his friend's face. "What about you?"

"Wh-what?" she stammered.

"What do you think about my idea of a lifestyle change?"

What did she think? What did she think? Jing Mei did not have the words to express the shock and surprise of John's announcement. There was only one thing she could do.

It was the last thing John expected. Right in front of him, Deb broke down in a fit of laughter. "Hey," he frowned. "I'm serious."

"John, you're not serious."

"Yeah, I am." He couldn't believe she would laugh at him.

'Really?' a small voice asked.

Okay maybe not that unexpected.

"John, you've been a ladies' man since I met you. For you to stay away from women, is like a bee declaring abstinence from pollen."

"Well, then I guess it will be the bee's first time."

Jing Mei sat up, trying to keep a straight face, wiping the tears from her cheek, and looked at him in confusion. "Why?" she asked. "Why this sudden revelation that you're not going to find Mrs. Right."

"I'm tired of it all."

"Really?" she smirked. "All of it?"

"Okay," he sighed, rolling his eyes. "Maybe not all of it. I'll miss that part, but I'm sure there are ways to aleve that problem."

As soon as the word aleve left his mouth, Jing Mei broke out in laughter again. She couldn't help it. She imagined John propositioning women for one night stands and it struck her as hilarious.

"Thank you," he groaned. "Thank you for thinking my former love life as something akin to a comedy."

"I'm sorry," she giggled, "John. Really." She cleared her throat and put on the straightest face she could muster. "I really am. I'm behind you. All the way. Really."

"Really?" He stared at her with a droll expression. "Why don't I really believe you?"

"Because your grandmother was completely right?" she blurted out. "Because this sounds 'completely absurd' - to use her words."

She couldn't believe this. All of her luck. Here she was about to tell John that she had feelings for him, when suddenly it looked like that she might not even have to - until the interruption. And then John declares his desire for celibacy. Everything had just a mark of the incredulous.

"See! I knew you weren't being serious about supporting me! What chance do I have, if my friends don't believe in me."

"John, this has nothing to do with believing in you," she sighed. "It's just that, well, it just seems a bit extreme, don't you think?"

"Why?" John replied, furrowing his brow in frustration. "WHY? I am tired of this whole cat and mouse game. I'm tired of it. I don't know if it is because I'm just not there yet, or if I'm just not meant to have it. Either way, it's too late."

Jing Mei was taken aback by his sudden anger. She studied her best friend as he ran his fingers through his hair, as he always did when he was at a loss of words. Suddenly, she knew that he was completely serious. John Carter wanted out of the game of love. Her heart sunk to the pit of her stomach. She was too late.

"Okay," she whispered softly, as she tried to quietly digest the harsh reality of it all.

"Yeah?" he said irritably. "You got it?"

"I get it." Jing Mei nodded slowly "I'm sorry, if I thought it was a joke," she sighed. "I just didn't realize..."

"Well..." John looked up to see the remorse in her eyes; and he soon regretted his harshness. "I am serious," he said more gently than before. "But you don't need to feel...bad, about what you thought."

"I do." Jing Mei felt a flood of emotions. Anger and regret, sorrow and frustration - why could he have not given her a shot? "I get it," she repeated.

"Look Deb," he said, reaching out to her. "I'm sorry to have dumped all of this on you. It's not your fault that people don't believe me. It's mine. I mean, how can I blame anyone for not believing me?"

Jing Mei nodded, lowering her eyes and turning slightly so that the tears that had begun to form in her eyes would be masked. "That's okay," she coughed, trying to mask the tears choking her.

John knew it wasn't okay that he took his frustration at the first words of doubt out on her. It's not always about you. Suddenly he felt like a jerk. This whole night had turned into the equivalent of a dissection of his love life. Deb, meanwhile, had come over to talk to him about something. "I'm sorry," he said softly. "I'm a total jerk. I've turned everything into something about me. What did you come over to talk about?"

She felt his hand come to rest upon her shoulder. It was meant to be a comforting gesture, but it just made everything so much worse. Jing Mei could not believe how this night had turned out. Nothing in her wildest imagination could have come close to this catastrophe.

"Deb?"

She couldn't deal with it. She needed air. She needed to be able to breathe.

Quickly she wiped away the hidden tears, and she plastered a smile on her face. Clearing her throat, she laughed. "I'm fine," she lied. "Just got something in my eyes."

"Are you sure?" John frowned, moving in closer. He reached out to push a stray hair away from her face, but she pulled away.

"I really should get going," she blurted out, feigning a glance at her watch. "I have an appointment tomorrow morning."

"I thought you were not working tomorrow?"

"Yeah, this is a personal appointment," she lied again. Jing Mei bit the inside of her cheek and then smiled as brightly as she could. "So, thanks for tonight."

"We didn't even talk about anything." John knew something was wrong. He could tell by her body posture. "C'mon," he coaxed. "I know I was a bad host, but we can still talk."

"It was really nothing," she dismissed. "I just had a bad night at work." She moved past him and towards the foyer.

"Are you sure?" he asked, grabbing a hold of her upper arm. He spun her around, until she was looking at him face to face. "Because you know I'm always here to talk to you about anything."

"Yeah," she replied wistfully. "You are, aren't you?"

"I am." John smiled softly.

Jing Mei studied his face once more. His concern flickered deeply within the dark pools that stared back at her. Without thought, her hand reached up and caressed his face. "Before you swear off women completely," she spoke lost in his eyes, "do I get a shot at the infamous John Carter?"

John did not expect that. And before he could answer, her soft full lips pressed against his.

Jing Mei closed her eyes, hoping there was no look of disdain or rejection etched upon his face. She wanted this one moment, knowing there would be no other. For at least one moment in time, he would be hers.

The surprise had faded and John found himself lost in the kiss. He loosened his grip on her arm, dropping it down and let it rest upon her waist, pulling her into him. His other hand cupped her face, his fingers slipping through her silky black hair, so he could deepen their kiss. Her body was lean, but soft. It fit against his perfectly.

Her lips moved, sucked, and tugged at his. He felt this unexplanable need for more of her. When he had lost all sense of time and his surroundings - all that mattered was her and the feel of her - suddenly she withdrew. John was dazed - a little confused - as he stood there emptyhanded.

"I'm sorry," Jing Mei said breathlessly, pressing her fingers against her lips. "I didn't mean for that to happen."

"W-wha?" His thoughts were in a jumble. He had no idea what had just happened - what had just transpired between them. "Deb, I don't..." Before he could finish his thought, she interrupted him.

"Don't worry, John," she whispered, gazing into his eyes. "We can chalk this up to 'something between friends'." She kept back the traces of bitterness that now lingered in her heart, and turned to leave.

"Can we?" John asked, grabbing her wrist as she tried to walk past him. His mind was still clouded by confusion as to what that kiss had meant, if it had meant anything. The taste of dry white lingered upon his lips as his tongue traced the memory of her kiss.

Jing Mei closed her eyes and felt her heart beat against her chest. She wanted to scream 'No'. But her thoughts trailed back to just minutes ago. He seemed unsure of what he wanted. He had made up this absurd disavow of a love life. She knew it would never last. But it opened her eyes - opened her eyes to where he was in his head and in his heart. And it was nowhere near her.

He was right about one thing. He wasn't ready for 'that someone', not yet. And maybe he never would be. But she knew she was. She was ready to meet 'the one'. Foolishly, she thought he had been it. He could have been it.

"Yes," was all she said to him before she pulled away from him, and walked out the door.