Softly Awaken

 

 

Chapter Twelve

 

*****

His appearance was like lightening, and his clothes were whitea s snow.

                       Matt 28:3

*****

 

Silence pervaded the bright white sterile hallway of Mercy.  Although the staff buzzed of patient information, doctors consulting one another, Jing Mei couldn’t quite grasp the reality of it.  She was starting her first day at Mercy.

 

The staff had tried to do their best to make Jing Mei feel at home, but with the pitying stares and the quiet whispers, she felt the least comfortable during those first hours.  Jing Mei tried to shake it off.  Praying that the patients would keep her mind off of Stephen.

 

Jing Mei had counted on working with Stephen on a daily basis.  Now she was on her own in a strange new hospital.  Never more, had Jing Mei felt so isolated and alone - a stranger in a strange, new world.

 

~~~

 

Luka had heard that Chen’s brother had been brought in during her last shift.  Rumor was that he and his fiancée had planned to surprise her.  The nurses talked about how Dr. Chen had broken down and gone missing, until Carter found her.

 

The pain and sock she was going through triggered old memories for Luka, ones that he’d thought were long forgotten.  By the extent of the injuries, Jing Mei’s brother should have died, Randi had informed the off-duty staff.

 

Luka would have surmised the same, and expected him not to last the next couple of days.  But when he came into the ER the next day, he found Dr. Chen’s brother in ICU, when looking for Romano.  He wouldn’t have known it was Dr. Chen’s brother, if he hadn’t overheard one of the nurses in the ICU.

 

The image of the private room remained etched in his mind.  A young blonde woman was kneeling in front of a window with something in her hand.  As Luka peered through the translucent door window, he caught a glimpse of a golden cross, which glinted in the daylight.  The chain attached hung delicately over the back of her hand.  Quietly she spoke; Luka could only see her soft lips move.

 

Luka stepped away from the scene.  He only wished that he had the heart to tell her that the Guy above really didn’t care.  He knew from experience.

 

~ * ~

 

Luka had pondered that thought all morning.  A God that didn’t care, what good was he?  Luka shook his head and tried to forget about yesterday’s striking memory.

 

“Luka!” Abby called from behind the admission’s desk.  “Twisted ankle in three.”

 

He looked at Abby for a moment, before nodding and waving his hand in acknowledgement.  A god of pain and suffering, that’s the kind of god Luka had known for the latter of his life.

 

~~~

 

Susan was enjoying her morning.  She had her cup of Jo for the start of her day and she wasn’t part of the County soap opera.  When Luka had invited her for an early breakfast that one morning, though an entire cup of coffee, she had toyed with the idea of dating him.  Maybe if the chemistry was right, the breakfast might even lead to something else, she had thought.

 

But as the breakfast continued, Susan realized to her chagrin, that it was just an invitation for a friendly conversation and inane chatter.  They both didn’t have a lot to say in the awkwardness of it all.  Both knew what could possibly arise from the situation.

 

When everything had been cleared from their table, Susan said an amicable goodbye and they parted company.  It was a lame duck.  Susan felt like they had nothing in common.  Or so she had thought that morning.  The next day, Luka asked her out for dinner and a movie.  She didn’t know why, but Susan had accepted.

 

During the evening, both seemed more at ease with the situation and had an understanding between the two.  Susan, who had always been blunt about things, told him that she felt awkward because of what the relationship might lead to.  She explained her theory that they couldn’t talk because they had expectations.

 

Luka had laughed.  He looked good when he laughed, Susan had thought.  Finally by the end of dinner, both had made an agreement that friendship and companionship would be all that would come out of their ‘dates’.

 

Susan realized both of them had emotional baggage that each had to deal with.  When Susan thought about it, she realized deep down that all she really wanted was someone to talk to again.  Susan was looking for someone to hang out with, like she had done with Mark.

 

And so she and Luka had begun to form a fast friendship.

 

~~~

 

Abby hadn’t seen John in several days.  He’d either been comforting Jing Mei up in ICU or busy with his rounds.  Certainly, John dropped by with a ‘hi’ here and a kiss there, but suddenly her sidekick, who never seemed to leave her side, couldn’t seem to be found anywhere.

 

Midst the misery of her torn feelings, Abby, who was grabbing something from the drug lockup, was startled when she felt an arm worm around her waist.  The quick warm touch of lips descended upon her neck, almost lending her to scream.  “What are you…” gasped Abby as she swung around to confront her Don Juan.  “John!”

 

The light chestnut-hair doctor raised his right eyebrow in a familiar suggestive gaze and smirked.  “And you were expecting?” teased John.

 

Abby’s heart slowed after the slight scare.  “Long time no see, stranger,” observed Abby, kissing John quickly on the lips before leaving the drug lockup. 

 

John smiled.  “Sorry about that.  Deb’s been freaked out since Stephen’s accident Friday.”

 

Abby was used to hearing excuses from people, but not from John.  Even though she knew it was the truth, Abby couldn’t help but roll her eyes.  It had been a week since the accident and his prognosis had been good.  No long-term damage.

 

Abby didn’t see the need for the handholding.  She just nodded, pretending it didn’t bother her.  Though Abby hadn’t been in a crisis, she still needed John to be there once and a while.  They were in a relationship, or so she thought.  “Whatever,” Abby shrugged.

 

John frowned.  “Are you sure it’s okay?  I know I haven’t seen you, but you were always in my thoughts,” John gushed.

 

Abby pushed him lightly.  “Go treat some patients doctor,” she sighed.

 

He’d been thinking about her.  Where’d she hear that before?  Abby walked about, checking on some of her patients.  She didn’t know which was worse, being made at John for not at least dropping by once that week, or that she really hadn’t missed him always at her side.

 

~~~

 

John was glad Abby wasn’t making a big deal over the time he was spending with Deb.  It was something he needed to do.  Once she had finished crying on top of the roof, Deb had followed John to the waiting room.  Deb paced the floor, babbling on about anything and everything.  When they received good news about Stephen, Deb had looked over at john, and he could see the relief in her eyes.

 

Over the next few days, the Drs. Chen arrived and hovered over their firstborn, demanding to know the treatment that was being used and what surgical procedures had been performed.  John had stuck around, in the background, supporting Deb whenever she needed it.  Her parents were so immersed in their son’s well being, they didn’t notice the heartache of their second eldest child. 

 

They had a family conference when everyone had arrived, John stood behind her as Jing Mei explained everything that happened.  John put in small tidbits of what had happened in the ER.  Everyone was there.  John had forgotten that Jing Mei had such a large family.

 

Even Henry had down up unexpectedly a few days into recovery.  He offered words of support, but Deb sent him away, telling him there was nothing to be done until Stephen woke up.  John knew he shouldn’t gloat, but he couldn’t help but watch Henry head towards the elevator with a smile.  Deb didn’t need a date; she needed a friend.  And he was just that.

 

It had been a while since they’d spent so much time together, but they fell back into step easily.  He fetched them coffee and even brought Deb and Jen magazines.  John did what he could to make their wait easier.  He would even check in on them during his breaks, making sure the Drs. Chen knew that they could page him for anything, not that they would.  They were a quiet couple, who didn’t make a fuss, especially when they were the ones in need.

 

After his shift that afternoon, John made plans for supper with Abby.  She finished her shift just a little bit later on in the afternoon.  But before he left, John popped in on Stephen.  The room was empty of visitors.  Stephen lay in his bed attached to a respirator to ease the work on the one working lung, while the other healed.

 

Deb would probably be there later in the evening, since she was starting her job today, surmised John.  When he was about to leave, Jen came back holding a cup of coffee.  She smiled weakly at him, her hair a mess.  “Hi Dr. Carter.”  She hadn’t left his side.  John hadn’t even see her leave the hospital for the entire week.

 

“Call me John.”

 

Jen nodded.  “You came to see Jing Mei?”

 

John smiled uncomfortably.  “I just wanted to see if she might need anything before I go, but I forgot she started at Mercy today.”

 

Jen smiled.  “She’s lucky that she’s got you to look after her.”  Jennifer paused a moment and then looked at John, gazing steadily into his eyes.  “I’m sure she’s feeling lonely over there.”

 

The timid blonde moved into the darkened room.  “These two,” Jennifer motioned toward Stephen, “couldn’t stop talking about it.  You know.  Working together?”

 

John nodded understandingly.  “How are you holding up?”

 

“Good as can be expected.”  She smiled widely, shaking her head, as if shaking off the heavy weight that sat on her shoulders.  “Praying my li’l ole heart out.  And He’s heard me so far!” Jen laughed.

 

“I can’t tell you how much this means to us all.  In the midst of everything, I forgot to thank you for taking care of Stephen.  Without you and the other ER doctors, Stephen wouldn’t have made it up to surgery.  And you’ve continued to look after us, Jing Mei, for the past week.”

 

John protested.  “It was nothing.”

 

“It’s something only a best friend would do.” Jen smiled sincerely.

 

“Well she is a close friend.  We go a long way back.  We’ve always been there for each other.  Although I don’t think I would have imagined us like this way back in med school.”

 

“Things change John.  Look at Stephen.  Things don’t always work out according to our plans.  Sometimes what we want doesn’t matter.”  Jennifer smiled and motioned that she’d better get back to Stephen.

 

John took a deep breath and sighed.  He waved goodbye and left to catch the ‘L’.  But John couldn’t forget what Jennifer had said. 

 

Sometimes we don’t always get what we want.