Loving Destiny

 

Disclaimer:  These characters do not belong to me, but to the writers and producers of Roswell

Spoilers:  After Chant Down Babylon, changes happening where Max is successfully rescued, and Michael was the one who broke up with Maria.

Pairings:  You’ll have to wait and see!

Pronunciation Guide:                                     

Author’s notes:           Queen Fadilia Kedar: Max/Isabel’s mother

                                        King Alaric Kedar: Max/Isabel’s father

                                        Andaria: Tess’ mother

                                        Radim:  Tess’ father

                              Kedrans: race from which Royal Four descended

                                        Iturians: race from which Khivar descended, and overthrew and killed Zan and the Kedrans

                                        Cerideans:  special core ops of the Iturian army, mostly psyonics and telepaths

                                        Kaptar’s Jewel:  constellation in the Antarian’s star system

                                        Yun’s Garment:  Aurora Borealis - Northern Lights

                              Saren Dari:  desert plain on Antar

                                        dashka :  good luck charm

                                        elkarl :  Iturian hand weapon

                                        capaechea:  long haired woolly creature, with long flanks and a large hump on its back

                              kii:  location where various endangered animals are kept for protection

                                        Mount Freiweils: location of Loyalist secret base

                                        Tir Lamar:  sister city to Eshtari

                                        kashkar: slur, equivalent to witch

                                        plascer:  plasma weapons, compact, length of your hand

 

Chapter Sixty Four

 

***

I am your Creator.  You were in my care even before you were born.

                                                                                                      - Isaiah 44:2

***

 

"No!" Isabel clenched her fists and gritted her teeth as raw primal emotions, springing from an unending well she didn't know existed, surged up and overtook her. Spinning around, she left her dead husband and turned to face his murderer, who met her with an expression of both contempt and fear. The strength which she drew upon was not her own and came from a dark place that Isabel had never visited; but from the unexpected death that had occurred mere moments beforehand, she blindly struck out in complete despair.

The wealth of energy that poured forth from the still-trembling hands illuminated half of the desert plain. While she rid the Earth of the unfeeling killer, Isabel was flooded with images of Jesse. She closed her eyes, trying to block out the feel of his kiss, the way his smile made her feel warm and full of hope. His laughter echoed in her ears as if he was standing right there beside her. The moment of pure elation she felt when they were pronounced man and wife now surfaced, causing a sudden ache in her chest, as the bright white glow of pure energy began to wane before her eyes and everything began to fade - the darkness converging upon her.

Jesse. Oh God, why Jesse?

The anger and pain still lingered in the depths of her mind, warring, crying to be avenged; what she had done wasn't enough. Her arms grew limp and fell to her side; her eyelids drooped and her vision blurred, but before giving into the call of the soothing voice of sleep, with much effort, located a mound of black ashes in the midst of copper and gold - nothing left but dry, particle flakes scattered across the four winds.  That was what she was capable of.  Death. Isabel sounded a guttural cry - low and undefined - unable to voice find the words to explain the sense of loss...pain that wracked her body.  She hated everything in her life that had brought her to this moment of utter despair.

Let me die...just let me die.

~~~

Max shrunk back as a brilliant flash blinded him momentarily, just before he was about to rise from under Liz's unconscious body. Isabel's voice was as clear as daylight, as she struck out at the young captain under Qunar's command. The hurt, pain and anger fuelling his sister created the most spectacular display of power he had ever witnessed before, short of his own prior invitation to Qunar for him to show himself. He shielded his eyes, as he searched for the catalyst of her fury - and he found it - Jesse's body lay flat upon his back, his eyes rolled back and his mouth agape.

Oh God.

Max looked up at Isabel, who had incinerated the captain in less than a half of a second, before he had a chance to defend himself, still pouring out volts of energy on nothing but a pile of dust. He closed his eyes and forced himself to focus on what still lay ahead.  Emotions are a luxury.

Max lifted his head as he noticed the light fade and witnessed Isabel's cry into the empty void before her. There was no possible way to comprehend what she had lost. He looked down at Liz, who lay unconscious, like that of Sleeping Beauty.

Qunar hadn't perceived the threat Vilandra still posed; as he was taken aback a moment ago, when the would-be princess suddenly rose from her deathbed to kill Captain Leisner. It was only when her anguish surfaced had Qunar known that he must finish her off - leaving no doubt as to her time of deathh. He bid his time, not wanting her to turn her unexpected powers on him. No, he waited until she dropped into human weakness again and felt the toll of her vast rage.

Just about...now. Qunar's lips contorted into a triumphant smirk as he watched the dark-haired royalty fall to her knees.

Max's eyes snapped to the sudden movement to his left; Qunar stood with open palm amid towards Isabel. "Not this time!" he growled, raising his hands towards the distracted enemy.

~~~

Light silently flew through the moonlit night, striking its intended victim. The victory was sweet for its assassin and bittersweet for its intended. As the lights of the far off galaxies sparkled in its' total oblivion, a shadow approached. The moonlight captured the familiar face, allowing one last glimpse of him.

Zan. Maxwell.

Before a word could be uttered, blackest darkness welcomed its newest resident.

~~~

"She's been barricaded in her quarters since they returned, Your Highness." Emine's voice was low and just above a whisper, holding a trace of an apology.

Fadilia nodded slowly, biting her bottom lip absentmindedly while she pondered the state of her daughter-in-law. The disclosure of the events of the mission had been kept to the Interior; General Steren had thought it best, as had she. Everyone had been at the meeting except Tess. "Has she spoken to anyone since she has returned?" The dark handmaiden shook her head tentatively. "Fine," she said, waving her dismissal towards Emine, who obeyed as if it had been spoken.

Fadilia waited until she heard the door close before letting out an anxious sigh. This did not bode well for their contingent of troops. Had Tess and Michael come home victorious it would have boosted morale, but it did not seem to be the Unseen's will. Even the schematics Quirinius had downloaded were encrypted and it would take some time to read them, if they could.

She closed her eyes and rested against the edge of her bed as she had dreamt of finally meeting her grandson.  When the realization that he was not with Tess sunk in she almost felt despair.  He was a symbol of the future of the Kedran lineage, just as Max was the hope of its return. Fadilia pressed her fingers against her lips, choking back the tears. There had to be an explanation...there just had to be.

~~~

Again and again she replayed the events of that day in her mind, trying to think of another way she could have possibly rescued Zander without the threat of his death looming over him - the cause of his return to captivity. Tess let out an angry cry. She searched the minimalist room for something loose, something to throw. Her fingers curled around a small, smooth round object, about the size of a large egg; with all of her might she twisted her body and flung the object across the room and against the hard walls. It made one large cracking sound and then a variety thuds, differing with size as the object crumbled to the floor.

Tess stood there a moment, her breath laboured, as her gaze trailed from the white marking on the wall to the pile of mineral that had once formed a holograph - a gift from the Loyalists that was programmed with images of her past life as well as her current life. "Damn," she yelled hoarsely, pressing the heels of her palms against her temples. Closing her eyes, Tess willed the tears that were brimming, threatening to fall. She shook her head, consciously breathing in and out, in an attempt to pull herself together.

I can't lose him. God, I can't lose my son!

Tess wrapped her arms around her stomach, cradling it. She bent over, slowly dropping to her knees and allowing the sobs to flow in the isolation of her room. Zander. Her mind would not stop saying his name over and over, as if saying it numerous times would conjure up her son. This can't be happening. Everything was under control.

Tess covered her face with her hands and allowed the wet manifestation of her sorrow comfort her. Why did I leave him with a stranger?  Plagued with doubt and fear for her son, the room seemed to swirl around her in a blurry haze.  None of this was expected and would the General not have spoken to her of a Loyalist spy within the walls of Saren Dari?  As her curiosity and questions mounted, the tears began to subside, as the analytical side of her began to review the mission without the pain and remorse that plagued her the other several hundred times she had done this.

"Why didn't he want to leave?" she asked aloud to herself. Her body was trembling - a usual aftermath of a cry fest.

Swallowing hard, Tess furrowed her brow and pressed her index finger against her bottom lip as she thought about her son's voice and Barak's turn for the 'good'. Her mind churned and groaned as she tried to understand why her son would tell her to leave him. It was not because of fear. She felt no fear in his mind; in fact she felt understanding and confidence of what the future held. "This just doesn't make any sense."

"What doesn't make any sense?"

Tess jerked her head up to see Michael standing in her doorway. She frowned. "How did you get in?" She had made sure that she coded her doors to lock and open to a certain security code, which only she knew. Tess had only planned on using it in extreme times; one like this one, which she hadn't expected.

"I have my ways," Michael said mischievously, although his eyes revealed his tentativeness to his attempts at lightheartedness.

Tess took a deep breath, knowing that her body hadn't physically recovered from the emotional turmoil she had just gone through, and she didn't want anyone to know about. With slow precision, Tess rose from the floor, making sure she had her balance and wouldn't stumble, giving Michael or anyone else cause to know how much giving Zander up had nearly destroyed her. "Did you hotwire the security system?"

"A sophisticated system like that? How would I even know how to begin?" Michael frowned at her like she had given him too much credit, feigning ignorance.

"Yeah, well they've gotten so sophisticated that the architects don't even think about people having the skill to hotwire the system. I know," she replied dryly.

"So, you been busy attacking walls, have you?" Michael glanced casually towards the chalky white mark she had left after throwing the holograph at the wall.

Tess rolled her eyes and walked towards the small pile of rubble. "It was being nosy," she said, glaring at him over her shoulder. "Just like you are." Bending over, Tess kneeled in front of the mess and began to pick up the pieces of rock.

"Hey, if you want to try to throw me against a wall," he spread his arms open, as if giving her an opening, "give it your best shot."

Tess shook her head and returned to the task of cleaning her room. "What are you doing here, anyway?" She pushed herself up from her kneeling position and walked over to the metal chute that was on the opposite side of the room, just above her desk, and slid the garbage into its mouth. Dusting off her hands she placed them on her hips and gazed up at Michael. "Well?" she asked, staring at him impatiently.

"I think you know why I'm here."

Now it was her turn to play dumb. She shook her head. "No. Can't say that I do." Tess walked casually over to her desk where she went to check up on the status of the encrypted schematics.

Tess hated this prying, and she thought Michael should know better than this. She heard Michael sigh exasperatingly. "Look I know you are having a hard time dealing with giving up Zander like that..."

Tess spun around and glared at him. "Don't talk to me about that," she warned, trying to keep the well of emotions from being drawn from again. "You don't have a clue; and I don't want to talk to you about this." Tess began punching a several keys on the touch control panel, turning away from Michael's steady, scrutinizing gaze. "I already said as much as I'm going to say in the ship."

"You need to talk about it."

Tess curled her fingers into a fist and swallowed hard. She turned calmly and faced Michael, gazing at him with cold stoicism. "Just like you want or need to talk about Isabel? Or did that problem just disappear?" The sharpness in her voice was tinged with regret in the end.

The worry and concern in his eyes flickered and disappeared. He nodded slowly. "You know, you're right. Maybe I'm not the right person to talk to you about this." Michael turned and walked towards the door; he paused at the entrance as the door slid open. "You don't have to go through this alone, you know." His voice was cold, yet she could hear the sincerity masked by the hurt. "I've remembered a lot since we've returned, and learned a little: Don't fool yourself into thinking that we're alone in this. We have to stick together or we'll leave Antar the exact way we did the first time."

Tess stared after Michael as his shadowed form strode into the dim corridors. Not alone? Tess scoffed at this. I've always been alone...ever since I was created.

~~~

‘And you’ll need to find Nonnie’s body.’

Barak pretended to inspect the equipment and the security system now tagged to the bio processing unit. We will ensure Andaria receives a proper burial.

‘No. No burial.’

Barak frowned. He didn’t understand why the child refused burial. It will be according to Kedran law. He hoped that would reassure Prince Zander.

‘No.’

Can you explain why?

Silence.

“Barak.”

The tall Loyalist spy spun around to find Nicholas striding purposefully toward him. “Yes my Liege?” He stood at attention and saluted the repulsive excuse for a soldier.

“I hear congratulations are in order,” Nicholas spouted. “I am impressed that you were able to convince Ava that her son’s best interest is to remain here at Saren Dari.”

Barak curled the corners of his lips slightly and raised his brow, feigning a satisfied, malicious smirk. He had practiced that for several days. Once he was transferred to Saren Dari with Zander, he had many opportunities to perfect this expression. Nicholas seemed to take a liking to him, as he remained aloof and subservient in his presence. And to an egocentric Iturian like Nicholas that was paying him the respect due to him.

“I only did what my Liege would have done,” he replied modestly. It made Barak ill to pay this ilk any mind, but it was part of his mission.

Nicholas beamed at this compliment. “Well Barak, you’ve done well under my command. You are a quick study.” The short commander slapped Barak on the back and guided him away from the newly repaired unit and Zander. “I think you’ve earned some deserved time off.”

Barak’s eyes widened at the suggestion. Biting his tongue, he tried to remain calm and relax his muscles. Nicholas hadn’t tried to probe his mind since he had proved himself loyal, but if he gave any hint of cause for the probe he would be found out. Previously, when he had been subjected to the probes, he had known before hand and was able to mentally prepare for the assault. Also, the Loyalist architects managed to send him some diversionary implant that would subvert Nicholas’ probe from any of his true intentions. But without preparation he would be cull.

“Is something wrong, Barak?” Nicholas was staring up at him with a suspicious expression. “I would think you would be ecstatic at the possible leave from this god forsaken desert.” He said it with utter contempt.

Barak swallowed hard. “Uh, it’s just Sir...” Think fast. Think fast. “As you saw with the soldiers during this past confrontation with the enemy,” he paused a moment. “As I’m sure you, yourself noticed their complete and utter lack of discipline and intelligence when dealing with the Loyalists.” He cleared his throat. “As you witnessed, we lost an entire contingent of soldiers from their inability to defend or even transport prisoners.” Barak stopped there, knowing if he rambled it would be a complete giveaway.

Nicholas stared up at him with narrowed eyes, tilting his head to the side, as if debating whether this was a plausible explanation.

Barak tried to remain still and calm, although his heart was racing.

“Of course!” Nicholas suddenly replied. “I was just testing your determination and fortitude in obtaining our goal!”

Barak nodded once, as if acknowledging that this had been Nicholas’ plan all along; but he knew that it had not been a test. The commander had planned on allowing him to depart from Saren Dari on leave, but with the explanation he had given Nicholas for staying, it would have made the commander seem foolish to continue along that path, so Nicholas covered up in an attempt to look like it was just a test. “And very sneaky it was, Commander.” He plastered on a sincere smile...at least sincere enough for the likes of Nicholas and General Garrick.

Nicholas nodded and began mumbling to himself. “Yes. Yes.” He turned and looked up at Barak. “Well, I’m sure I’m keeping you from some errands,” he said, gesturing him to leave the laboratory. “You’re dismissed.”

Barak clicked his boots together and saluted. “Sir.” He strode towards the exit, without looking back. It had taken him a couple of weeks to train himself not to glance back towards the large oval unit that held Zander’s weak body. Though the child’s mind was strong, his body seemed to grow thinner and paler by the passing hour.

Barak cleared his throat as he turned sharply and walked down the sterile corridor, as he had done many times before. He will be fine. Zander had reassured Barak of that.  But in these days, he was beginning to wonder how he had allowed a mere child to comfort him.

It should have been the other way around.

 

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