Loving Destiny

 

Disclaimer:  These characters do not belong to me, but to the writers and producers of Roswell

Spoilers:  After Chant Down Babylon, changes happening where Max is successfully rescued, and Michael was the one who broke up with Maria.

Pairings:  You’ll have to wait and see!

Pronunciation Guide:   Nalder:  (Nal - dair)

                                                    Desya:  (Dez - ee - ya)

                                                    Yun’s:  (Y - oo - ns)

                                                    Emine:  (Em - i - nee)

                                                    Sela:  (See - la)

                                                    Kateya:  (Kà -tee - ya)

                                                    Eshtari:  (Esh - tar - ree)

                                                    Cedris:  (Seh - dris)

                                                    Badr:  (Ba – dir)

Author’s notes:      Queen Fadilia Kedar: Max/Isabel’s mother

                                        King Alaric Kedar: Max/Isabel’s father

                                        Andaria: Tess’ mother

                                        Radim:  Tess’ father

                              Kedrans: race from which Royal Four descended

                                        Iturians: race from which Khivar descended, and overthrew and killed Zan and the Kedrans

                                        Cerideans:  special core ops of the Iturian army, mostly psyonics and telepaths

                                        Kaptar’s Jewel:  constellation in the Antarian’s star system

                                        Yun’s Garment:  Aurora Borealis - Northern Lights

 

 

Chapter Forty Six

 

***

But my heart says nay; and all my limbs are light, and a hope and joy are come to me that no reason can deny.

                                                                                                      - J.R.R Tolkien

***

 

“Where are we now?” Liz giggled, as Kyle led her up a dark and narrow trail.

 

“I thought you liked surprises,” Kyle smirked.

 

“I never said that,” she protested.

 

Kyle hadn’t planned this detour, but the afternoon had been so much fun; he didn’t want it to end just yet.  The Northern Lights were out - an odd aberration - and he thought he might take advantage of one of nature’s unexplained wonders. 

 

“You’ll see.”

 

~~~

 

“The flight plan has been logged,” Nalder informed Desya, the flight commander.

 

The Munan commander nodded, as he stared up at the clear evening sky.  “It will be a good night to fly,” he said out loud, though no one knew whether he was speaking to the group or to himself.

 

Tess swallowed hard.  She had never traveled by spaceship.  It would be her first time, at least in her hybrid form.  “Then let’s go.  We are needed on Antar.”  As she approached the tall, narrow ship, that stood about 240 ft high, Tess took one last look back at the twinkling lights of Roswell that shone in the distance.  The ramp, which led onto the grey shadowy ship, was lit dimly by small bulbous lights hovering a few centimetres from the ground, flickered as if beckoning her in.

 

“I never imagined this night would come,” Michael sighed, also staring out at the vast dark void of night.  He tried to lock away every memory he had of his ‘home’.  Thin, spidery fingers slithered from behind him, to grip his shoulders.

 

“I am sure your people have thought the same things,” Desya said comfortingly.  “It is even known in our world - the great story of the Royal Four’s return.”

 

“But it is not the Four returning,” Tess said solemnly.  “It is but two.”  She tried to curb the pain in her voice, but it would not be hidden.

 

Tess stiffened as she turned to face Michael.  There was no more time for dawdling.  Their peoples’ lives depended on their quick and safe return.  “Michael.”

 

He turned his head slightly, enough to see the anxiety creeping into Tess’ eyes.  He nodded.  “Let’s go.”

 

~~~

 

Liz felt this sudden humming underneath her feet.  She shook her head.  She must be imagining things. 

 

As Kyle led her up towards the clearing, past the slight incline in front of them, Liz felt the vibrations continue to tremble beneath her feet.  She frowned.  Kyle,” she said hesitantly.  “Is the ground supposed to be shaking?”

 

Kyle looked behind him, as Liz’s smooth hand squeezed his tightly, and her body refused to move another inch.  “I don’t think so.”  He hadn’t expected this unusual experience.  He had just wanted to look out across the bluff.  “Do you want to turn back?” he asked apprehensively.

 

Liz pondered his wise suggestion.  It probably would have been the best choice, but something inside her, urged her to go on.  “I…I think we should see what’s over the hill.”  Her voice was hesitant. 

 

She wasn’t sure she really wanted to find out, but her curiosity had always gotten the better of her.  How else would she explain her adventures with Max, Isabel, and Michael?

 

“Okay,” Kyle gulped.  “Whatever you say.”

 

They climbed the last leg of the steep incline and peered overtop of the dry, dusty knoll, shocked at what they saw.

 

~~~

 

Tess had just stepped aboard the dimly lit ship.  Its’ frame was firm and cold, as she let her fingers glide against its’ walls.  She would be going home soon.

 

Michael waited until the three Munans’ had boarded before taking one last look at Earth.  Would this truly be the last time he would set foot on Earth?

 

Suddenly, as he was about to enter the hissing mammoth’s mouth, loud shouts cried out from behind a large dark bush.  His body tensed, ready for any form of attack.  The Munans came to the entrance portal to beckon him onto the ship.  They were ready for a hasty ascent.

 

Michael!” a woman’s voice cried.

 

His head spun around in recognition of his name.  Michael squinted in the darkness, as the glow of the ship did not allow enough light for him to discern who was rushing towards them, though the voice sounded familiar.  “Liz?”

 

Tess heard the commotion and ran to the mouth of the ship.  “What’s going on?”

 

As her words left her mouth, she saw a tall muscular shaggy-haired man step into the flickering luminescence of the ship’s interior light.  “Kyle,” she gasped.

 

How did they find out?

 

~ * ~

 

“Where do you think you are going?” Kyle exclaimed.  The words came tumbling out of his mouth.  He wasn’t even sure it was him asking the question.  The epic size of the unexpected spectacle before him boggled his mind.

 

A spaceship.  A real, live spaceship.

 

Michael groaned silently.  They didn’t have time for this.

 

“We are leaving for Antar,” Tess stated calmly.  “What does it look like?”

 

The Munans’ had taken human form once more and edged closer to the confrontation.  “We must leave before Yun’s Garment has dispersed,” Nalder said uncomfortably.

 

Liz’s eyes darted around the massive ship that stood before her.  It overwhelmed her.  How had this ship remained hidden?

 

She turned her focus to Michael and Tess.  “I thought you weren’t leaving until Max and Isabel returned?” she said suspiciously.

 

“We weren’t,” Michael said regretfully.  “But things are happening on Antar that we can’t ignore.”  He wished he could stay; keep his promise to Isabel.  But at this stage in the game, he knew remaining on Earth would put Andaria at great risk, and he knew Tess would never allow that.

 

“But Michael…” Liz hedged.  She didn’t know what to say to convince him that going with Tess was a mistake.  She thought would have more time.  She looked at Kyle for help, but he was focused on Tess; he had other things on his mind.

 

“Listen Liz, I need you to understand that truth is always in the eyes of the beholder.”  Michael almost rolled his eyes at his insight.  It was almost intellectual.

 

“What are you talking about Michael?”  Liz didn’t understand. 

 

Why did he sound so different?  And why did he make it sound like she was the one with the limited insight on the situation.  She folded her arms across her chest, feeling restless; she was still upset from the sight of the unexpected.

 

“Maria knows about everything.  She understands now,” Michael explained slowly.  “And I need you to trust me.  I need you to trust that I know what I’m doing.”

 

“Look, Max and Isabel are going to come home and find us gone.”  Liz nodded.  “I need you to tell them everything.  I need you to help them understand what is at stake right now, and what they need to do.”

 

“And how am I supposed to do that, Michael?  When I don’t understand anything myself?  You’re leaving without so much as a word, and you’re telling me that I need to help Max and Isabel ‘understand what they need to do‘?”

 

Her mind was spinning with endless questions.  There was no way she could do what he was asking her…even if she had known what that was.

 

Michael kneeled in front of her, so that they were eye level with each other.  “Liz, you were right when you said that you had received that power from Max for a reason,” he said guardedly.  “It was to save him, but not in the way you thought.”

 

 Maria has these memories, and you need to understand them as she does now.”  Michael swallowed, his throat had become dry, longing for the uncomfortable conversation to end. What he was expecting her to do, it was beyond all reason; yet if she did it, he believed that she would see what needed to be done.

 

“What are these memories?” Liz asked skeptically.  His vague, mysterious explanations were making her more fretful and uptight than she had been before.

 

“Maria has the answers now,” Michael said, distancing himself.  “I don’t have anymore time to explain.”  He felt the vibrations under his feet and turned to see Desya reach out to tap his shoulder, his head gesturing for him to enter the awaiting ship.

 

Michael looked at Liz’s confused expression, and felt uneasy leaving her like this.  But he knew from the lightening skies, that the new morning was drawing near and they had no more time for explanations.  It was time to go home.

 

~~~

 

Tess had watched Liz’s mind churn, thinking of ways to convince Michael that this was the wrong course of action.  She had bit her tongue and stopped herself from rolling her eyes.  Instead of entering into their conversation, her gaze fell upon Kyle.  She had hurt him, and she had played with his mind.  It was one of her biggest regrets, other than beginning the chain of events that led to Alex’s death.

 

Kyle wasn’t paying any attention to what Liz and Michael were talking about.  His sole focus was Tess.  He never got to tell her what he thought of her and what she had done to him and Alex.  Part of him kept on telling himself to stay calm.  He would only hurt himself if he let her get to him.

 

Midway through Liz and Michael’s conversation, he clenched his fist and swallowed hard.  What the hell!  What did he care about being ‘enlightened’ when he stood in front of this monster?

 

Tess could tell Kyle was chomping at the bit to say something to her.  She could feel his anger seething beneath his calm exterior.  She closed her eyes and sighed.  She owed him that much. 

 

As Kyle was about to call Tess out, but she beat him to the punch.  “Kyle,” she said evenly, “we need to talk.”

 

He slowly lowered his arm that pointed accusingly at her.  “Yeah,” he said caught-off-guard.  “Well then…let’s talk.”  Kyle gestured for them to move their conversation elsewhere; as Liz sought her own set of answers.

 

They slipped away from the conversation, their absence barely noticed.  He moved off to the side of the glowing metallic ramp, where Tess met him at the bottom; she stood at the lip of the ramp, while he stared evenly at her, as the ramp evened out their height difference.

 

“Look before you start yelling at me,” Tess said uneasily.  “I just wanted to tell you that…”

 

Kyle shook his head.  “No.  You don’t get to talk!” he said angrily.  “I…we took care of you, Tess.  And you repaid us with nothing but lies and pain.”  His hands were shaking.  Kyle hadn’t realized how angry he was until she stood in front of him, alone.

 

“I thought of you like a sister and you…all that time you were plotting against me…I mean, us.”  His voice cracked under the emotion of it all.  His anger suddenly left him.  It was as if it had just vanished and all that was left was this stabbing pain.  His thoughts drifted to the dinners and the movie nights…it had all been an act.  “You didn’t care for me at all…did you?” he said agonizingly.

 

“Kyle…no,” she whispered.

 

Tess had no idea how badly she had hurt him.  Seeing him in this amount of pain, it tore at her soul.  How she wished she could just turn back time, and stopped herself from doing this to all of them.  But she couldn’t.

 

“I’m so sorry.  I never meant to hurt you, Kyle.  It just happened.”  The words felt meaningless in the sight of the broken down teenager before her.  How could she fix it?  How could she ease his pain?

 

Kyle narrowed his eyes and scoffed.  The empty apology left him cold.  And once again, his anger returned.  Never meant to hurt me?” he cried out angrily.  Give me a break!”  Every muscle tensed in his anger.

 

“I believed you once, Tess.  I even befriended you when none of the others wanted to have anything to do with you.  I felt sorry for you.”  He seethed at the memory of his naiveté.  They had been right not to trust her.  And he had just been too blind to see it.  “I don’t want your apology,” he sneered.  “I just want you to know how much I hate you.”

 

Tess winced at the declaration.  Her stomach churned and her head began to ache.  Swallowing the bile that rose to her throat, Tess looked tearfully at Kyle.  “I’m sorry,” she whispered one last time.  “I never meant…”  She reached out until her fingers were inches from his face.

 

Kyle glared at her with all of the anger and hatred he could muster.  He didn’t move.  He knew he should have.  Kyle silently scoffed.  What else could she do to him that she hadn’t already?

 

“You never what?” he spat.  “Meant to use me in your plan to kill Alex?  Or do you mean, you never meant for me to remember?”

 

Tess slowly inched forward and touched his face.  “You weren’t supposed to remember,” she said wistfully.  Her words seemed to be in reply to his accusations.

 

Then in a silent decision, Tess closed her eyes, as her fingertips caressed his temple.  A slow warm pulsation slid down her arms and into her fingertips.  “But you will.  You will remember everything.”

 

Tess entered Kyle’s mind, in a blink of an eye.  Everything was rose-colored - not in a good way - in response to his physical and emotional anger.  And as she walked down the hallway in the familiar chambers of his psyche, Tess came to a halt in front of a wall.  It was hidden behind the remnant of a broken down wall.  She pressed her hand against the firm surface, and underneath her palm glowed a silver handprint. 

 

It would be her gift to him.

 

“Maybe this will make up for the lies, and the pain I put you through.” 

 

Kyle closed his eyes and shook his head, as if trying to shake the sleep from his eyes.  “I remember everything clearly,” he retorted, staring up at Tess, who stood calmly before him.  “And I don’t need you to help me with anything.”

 

Tess nodded sombrely.  There was nothing left to do here.  Turning to Michael, who seemed to end his conversation at the same time as she and Kyle, she smiled sadly.  “Are you ready to go?”

 

Michael nodded.  “I’m ready.”

 

~~~

 

Liz and Kyle stood dumbfounded, as they watched the vertical disc ascend into the dancing ribbons of blue and purple.  Both knew that the night they saw the ‘Northern Lights’ would be unforgettable.

 

~~~

 

“We’re not like the FBI,” Agent Firth leered as his nose pressed up against Jesse’s.  “We’re here because National Security has been breached and you, Mr. Ramirez, are a part of that plot!”

 

“I don’t know anything!” he spat.

 

Agent Firth stepped aside, as a larger, more muscular agent stepped in front of him.  He was tall and dark, his skin shone with perspiration.  Jesse closed his eyes as the agent jammed his fist into his stomach, making him gasp for air.  Once he caught his breath Jesse narrowed his eyes, studying his two captors.  “What are you guys trained at the same place?” he joked.

 

The older agent smiled, as if the joke tickled him, while the obvious ‘muscle man’ gave him another taste of pain, for his troubles.  “Keep mouthin’ off Mr. Ramirez, but sooner or later, you’re gonna crack.”

 

Jesse rolled his eyes.  Suddenly he laughed to himself as his thoughts wandered.  I’m getting good at this prisoner gig.  Maybe I should change careers!

 

“I don’t think you’re going to have that smirk on your face too long,” Agent Firth informed Jesse, with a grin.  “I think this,” pulling out a long, plastic syringe, “will move things along, very quickly.”

 

The dark-haired agent pressed the injector of the syringe, allowing a line of clear liquid to arc out of the silver needle.  Jesse squirmed in his seat, kicking, and screaming profanities at the agents.

 

“Now, now, Mr. Ramirez,” Agent Firth smiled coldly.  “You don’t want to move.  I’m bound to hit an artery that way.  And you don’t want that do you?”  The agent moved closer, as Jesse continued to thrash around in his chair.

 

Keel, keep him from moving around!”

 

Jesse struggled against the lackey agent, who wrapped his arms around Jesse’s neck, in a headlock.  The contracted muscles in the agent’s arm constricted his airway, making Jesse lose almost all consciousness.  Just before everything around him began to fade, he felt a pinprick in his neck.  Then everything went black.

 

~~~

 

“What was that?”  Isabel frowned as she saw a narrow stream of light streak across the night sky.

 

Max shrugged.  “What was what?”  He peered upwards, trying to catch a glimpse of the anomaly, which had Isabel on the edge of her seat.

 

“Didn’t you see it?”

 

Max shook his head.  “See what?”

 

Isabel rubbed her temples and closed her eyes.  Maybe she was seeing things.  It had been that kind of night.  Images kept flashing over and over in her mind.  Bits of her past kept creeping up on her, and it was unnerving.  “It was probably nothing,” she sighed, waving Max off, gesturing for him to keep his concentration on the road.

 

“Are you sure?” he asked curiously.  The journey had been long, and they were both tired.  But he couldn’t help but feel like there was something more to the spectacle Isabel thought she saw.

 

She nodded, smiling faintly.  “Do you think he’ll survive?”

 

The words just tumbled from her mouth.  It was a sudden change of subject.

 

“What?”

 

Isabel stared sombrely at her brother.  “Do you think Michael will survive?” she repeated her question.  “Do you think Michael and Tess will be able to beat Khivar?”

 

The mood in the jeep became tense and solemn.

 

“I don’t know why you’re thinking like that right now, Isabel.”  Max tightened his grip on the steering wheel while trying to deal with the thought of Michael possibly dying out there.  “We don’t need to be thinking about that right now,” he grimaced.

 

Yes we do, Max.”  Isabel slumped back into the bucket seat and folded her arms across her chest.  “What if they die because of us?” she whispered.

 

Max glanced warily at Isabel’s ominous thoughts.  “They won’t die,” he answered uneasily.  Listening to himself speak, Max wouldn’t have blamed Isabel for not feeling reassured at his reply.

 

Isabel swallowed hard, trying to rid herself of a growing lump in her throat.  Staring up into the waking morning, she watched the rosy hues of the sun envelope the dimming stars.  She couldn’t help but feel like something was on the horizon that would surprise them both.

 

~~~

 

“Have you located Ava yet?” Khivar growled.  The short, child-like officer, whose uniform seemed to swim on him, kept his head bowed.

 

“No, Your Highness.”

 

Khivar slammed his fist on his desk, making the unattached objects lift several inches off the hard surface.  “Damn it.  Where are you hiding, you treacherous deserter?”  His mind churned with possible sites where the former queen could have hidden herself.  He knew she would come out of hiding sooner or later; she would never leave her precious Zander for long.

 

“Your Highness, what are your orders?”

 

His beady eyes turned on the imp of a man and narrowed.  “Turn every village, town, and city upside down, until we find her!” he commanded, wringing his gloved hands.

 

“Yes, Your Majesty.”  The craven soldier bowed and skittered anxiously out of the room.

 

Khivar stepped from behind his desk and onto the narrow balcony, which looked upon their capital, Eshtari.  “Where, oh where, are you, Ava?” he whispered, his tone ominous and foreboding.  “I think I’ve waited too long…to give you exactly what you deserve.”

 

Uexpectedly he laughed, a deep and throaty laugh, and then as suddenly as his first mood change, his expression  - like Jekyll and Hyde - became menacing and hostile.  He had waited long for his plans to come to fruition, and no waif of a Kedran would keep him from that - even if she was chosen.

 

~~~

 

Fadilia was pleased at the speed of mobilization.  General Steren had kept in contact with many of their leading commanders and army veterans, who had secretly trained most of the sons and daughters of their exiled people, preparing for the Day of Reckoning.  She was pleasantly surprised to see a new generation of Loyalists, ready to rise up from the ashes of their fallen kingdom.

 

Fadilia,” a timid woman’s voice interrupted her thoughts.

 

She turned around in her quarters to find a woman with long black locks that cascaded down to her waist, and a warm, smiling nubile face standing in the dim entranceway.  Her eyes were averted in a sign of veneration; her long dark lashes hid the stunning blue eyes beneath them.  To Fadilia’ amazement they always managed to startle her, even after all of these years..

 

“Emine, come in.”  Fadilia beckoned to her, as she set down the thin, feather-like implement between the crease of screen journal. 

 

The dark maiden floated across the worn path in Fadilia’s chamber.  She stood several feet away from Fadilia, who was sitting at her desk.

 

When Fadilia and her Elect escaped to the cavernous mountain base, Emine’s mother, Sela, handmaiden to Kateya, Fadilia’s sister; followed, since her service was no longer needed - Kateya had been one of the first to fall victim to Khivar’s schemes.  Sela became Fadilia’s handmaiden, since it had been decided that Andaria would remain above ground.

 

Now, Emine followed in her mother’s footsteps after her passing.

 

“Your Highness,” she said unassumingly.  Her sweet, low voice reminded Fadilia of Sela.  “General Steren commanded me deliver news of Queen Ava and Commander Rath’s return.”

 

Fadilia nodded for her to continue.  “What is it?”

 

Emine smiled joyously.  “He said that they have departed from Earth and are en route to Antar.”

 

Fadilia’s heart soared.  “Thank you.”

 

The young handmaiden clasped her hands together and pressed them against her breast; bowing deeply, she slowly and quietly backed out of Fadilia’s chambers.  She did not change her position until she stood in the dark hallway, as was protocol for Antarian servants of the Court.

 

Fadilia sighed deeply, her eyes falling upon her open journal.  The light blue screen glowed, illuminating the meticulous scribblings she had previously jotted down. 

 

They had ceased using primitive parchment to maintain records for many seasons now.  Their scholars and architects had developed a device that no longer required parchment, yet stored various types of data.  Her journal was one form of the touch-display rote which allowed her to vocalize her thoughts and have it recorded for posterity.  It was more efficient, but Fadilia preferred the other technique, which was to use the feather-like pen to form her thoughts.

 

She pushed her chair out from under her, and rose; her black robe trailed behind her.  Climbing the dim, narrow staircase, carved into the mountain side, Fadilia escaped the suffocating refuge - out onto a narrow plateau jutting from the barren landscape.  She was met with a darkening horizon; the crimson skies were intensifying into a startling blood red.

 

Fadilia carried a heavy weight - one, Alaric and Zan had carried under intense scrutiny - and she now understood the burden her son had ahead of him.  Even though her spirits were lifted with the announcement Ava and Rath’s return, she still faced the mounting crisis that was coming to a head, as Khivar’s list of atrocities continued to grow by the hour.  They would have to take action soon, or the people of Antar would have nothing left but ruins - Khivar’s latest rampage to locate Ava.

 

As bride elect of Alaric, Fadilia was educated in her duties as Queen, which meant managing the Court and its administration.  She had no experience in rallying the troops, or knowledge of what army protocol was.  Her saving grace though, had been when Alaric required her to attend meetings state and kingdom.  He was always thinking ahead; and in hindsight, Fadilia suspected he knew that she may one day be in this position. 

 

Her instruction also included army stratagem; this allowed her to understand the on goings of General Steren’s decisions and tactics against Khivar.  And as much as Steren assured her of his faith in her, she still couldn’t feel comfortable, especially when ordering loyal subjects into certain death - at this point in time, anyway.

 

Fadilia swallowed hard, as her thoughts drifted from attack strategies and placements of their battalions to Zan, whom she had yet to see.  As she tried to imagine her son, and his appearance now, her eyes fell upon the lone moon, which had now appeared from its’ haven.

 

The New Moons’ Festival was near.  And once Cedris, the second moon of Antar, began its’ journey into cloak of the planet’s shadow, she knew Khivar’s efforts to secure his place on the throne would redouble.  He knew the Prophecy, and though he refuted the notion, Khivar would be diligent in fortifying his strongholds…just in case.  The tyrant would go at them with everything he had; and considering the power he now wielded, including this unknown ‘project’ - described in one word, ’destruction - Fadilia and General Steren would have their hands full.

 

“The Prophecy must come to rest,“ Fadilia whispered softly.  She clutched unconsciously at her robe, as the evening breeze picked up and sent a shiver down her spine.

 

‘“We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed.”’  The words flowed effortlessly from her lips and brought with it consolation.

 

Fadilia had been, in what little spare time she had, building a library of files on Earth, its’ inhabitants, and its’ history.  Though she had studied most of its’ history  - war, rebuilding, destruction - Fadilia had been most interested in thhe sacred books of the planet.  She found it fascinating how they had so many beliefs and ‘religions’, as they had named it. 

 

Antar was not similar in that respect.  They were quite purposed, in respect to position and knowledge of  what they were destined to do.  Also, with many having the ability to inhabit one’s mind, those who tried to press upon - deceive - the majority, with false declarations of a new ‘deity’, were easily discerned.

 

Antarians were given the knowledge that a Greater Power had bestowed upon a certain line of their ancestors, gifts of overwhelming power, more so than any other line.  They were the chosen line - destined to rule Antar.  Prior to ‘The Fall’ memories of past Antarians had been preserved, by oral and visual ‘sharings’ to each generation.

 

Of course there were many, who though they witnessed the ‘Revelation’, as they named it, doubted, though the proof was evident and unexplainable.  This was not relegated only to Antarian society, it could be seen in all types of intergalactic society.  And they were called ‘The Dissenters’.  This ‘truth faction’, managed to deceive many, having false ‘Truth Sayers’ - mind readers - hidden within each populated city. 

 

Iturians seemed more susceptible to this sect, as they were in the heart of ‘The Dissenters’’ base.  Hakan was a founding member.  Consequently, Khivar’s rise to power, on the railings of dissenting Antarians - mostly Iturians - and a strong army, as their military program was well funded, should have been foreseen.

 

Nevertheless, Fadilia spent time dissecting the sacred scrolls stored in the Antarian database - locating the discrepancies - trying to discern if they had encountered the same ‘Deity’ the Antarians had been transformed by.  Though there were many concepts of transformation throughout many of the texts, no experience recorded on Earth matched the encounter Cian had with this ‘god’. 

 

She was about to stop her examination of the Earth texts when she came across a document titled, ‘The Bible’.  To her delight she found the text very similar to the writings of Antarian Seers - very much so.  It spoke of covenants and meetings with certain lines of humans - bestowals of blessings.

 

Fadilia spent sleepless moments devouring its contents.  And from the text, she gleaned new insights into their own scrolls.  The wisdom and understanding Alaric spoke of and with, which he obtained from their scrolls, now were hers.  She saw that this ‘Deity’ truly existed - she had been uninterested in her youth - and whole-heartedly sought His guidance, as Alaric once had.

 

While her thoughts traversed the winding paths of her consciousness, Fadilia’s line of sight came back to the brilliance of the celestial body above.  Soon.  Her thoughts once more went to her son, except this time, her thoughts were of the past. 

 

If only she had known what she knew now. 

 

Fadilia often thought about the past with regret.  It had taken only her son’s death to enable her to realize the truths Alaric had been explaining to her from their first meeting until his deathbed.  She closed her eyes to the reminder of her failure more than two decades ago.

 

Her son had been born with her stubborn streak.  Zan refused to bend.  It had been something she had been blind to.  Alaric had seen though, and warned both Fadilia and Zan.

 

Fadilia let out a mournful sigh.  Why hadn’t they listened?  She looked up at blank, mysterious slate that illuminated her mountainside.  Fadilia knew she had focus on the present.

 

With the coming New Moons’ Festival, Antar would have a chance at a new beginning.  It was all about changes and new beginnings.

 

~ * ~

 

“Why do we have to wait until the New Moons’ Festival?”

 

Fadilia leaned back in the cushioned chair, as Zan looked at her questioningly.  She tilted her head slightly, studying her son’s rugged features.  Many of his boyish features remained, though she was sure they would mature over time.

 

“Have patience, Zan,” she chuckled.  “Your time will come.”

 

He rolled his eyes and began to pace back and forth on the palace balcony.  “I am patient,” Zan said restlessly.

 

Fadilia pursed her lips, in attempt to stifle a smile.  She watched Zan brood over the fact that his father had informed him,  that in no uncertain terms, would he be crowned king before the New Moons’ Festival.  “What are you thinking?” she coaxed. 

 

Zan seemed to ignore her question, as his pacing continued - unwavering.  Then suddenly, he stopped mid-stride and fell in front of her, on his knees.  His dark brown eyes were overshadowed with unusual fear and doubt.  “What if he doesn’t think I’m ready?  Maybe that’s why he’s putting it off?”  His voice was like that of child, looking for reassurance.

 

Fadilia let out a soft sigh, as she sat up and cupped her son’s face in her hands.  She pressed her lips against her his warm forehead and shook her head.  “Don’t speak such nonsense, Zan.  It has nothing to do with whether your father thinks you’re ready,” she said reassuringly, meeting his gaze.  “You know your father thinks the world of you.”

 

Zan nodded hesitantly.

 

“The New Moons’ Festival Coronation is tradition.  The eclipses signal the end of the cold, and the darkness that comes with return of all things to the land.  As we celebrate the new Spring Season, it marks the birth of new beginnings and a time of change.”

 

“Your father’s reign will end, and it will signal the birth of a new king.  Do you understand Zan?” she asked, searching his eyes.

 

Reluctantly, she let Zan pull away from her touch, as he stood up and turned his gaze towards the city below.  Fadilia watched her son, attempting to discern whether he grasped the magnitude of this event.

 

Zan let out a thoughtful sigh.  He turned and looked at her.  “I know,” he replied,  His gaze met hers, but there was a distant, far off look in his eyes.  “It’s time for a change.”

 

Fadilia settled back into her chair.  “Yes,” she drawled.  “Changes can be good, if you are patient and don’t rush things.”

 

Zan walked towards the marble railing and leaned forward, looking down into the bustling city.  Unexpectedly, he spun around and laughed.  “Mother, I am going to build on what Father has created!” he exclaimed.  “I have ideas.  Tons of them!”

 

Fadilia laughed at her son’s enthusiasm.  She watched silently as he gestured wildly, explaining the plans that churned inside his head. 

 

“I know it’s a lot of change…” Zan turned and looked at her for approval, then continued on with his list of ideas.

 

Her whole body welled up with love and pride at her son’s plans.  She knew Zan’s love for Antar was the source for his unending ideas.  But suddenly Fadilia had this ominous feeling come over her, and an awful thought occurred to her.

 

No one would try to stop in all of this?  Would they?

 

Fadilia didn’t give it another moment’s pause before she found herself being pulled onto her feet by Zan.  He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed tightly.  “Oh Mother, I want to make him proud of me,” Zan exclaimed sincerely.

 

Startled at the show of affection, it took Fadilia a moment to recover, before welcoming his embrace.  With determination, she swallowed the lump that had developed in her throat,  and pushed her previous thought to the back of her mind. 

 

“And you will.”

 

~ * ~

 

Fadilia winced at the memory.  It had been so long since she had held her son in her arms.  Sometimes she didn’t know how she would make it through the day.

 

She looked toward the luminous globe that hung from the sky for some reply.  There was only silence.

 

Suddenly the sight reminded Fadilia of something Alaric had once  told her once.

 

‘The days always seem to tear and scratch at you.  By the time evening falls, I don’t know how I’m going to make it through.  But ‘the One’ always comes through.  I stand under the light of Badr and Cedris and, my Love, I am lifted up.  I have hope for a new day’

 

It sounded foolish.  Fadilia couldn’t imagine Alaric doing such a thing.  But as she stared out into the darkened forest before her, Fadilia found herself considering it.

 

“Queen Fadilia!”  A man’s voice beckoned her from her cavernous quarters.

 

Fadilia ignored the call for a moment as she looked up into the evening sky, one last time.  Unexpectedly the usually resonant valley below became still, as if holding its’ breath.  Fadilia gazed upon the wondrous body above her, which seemed to have suddenly swollen a few centimetres around from her viewpoint.

 

Taking a deep breath, she allowed the silver stream of moonlight envelop her.  Fadilia closed her eyes and stretched out her arms, welcoming the puzzling warmth that refreshed her - reaching deep inside of her.

 

Fadilia opened her eyes, and the moon, which seemed to have returned to its normal circumference, greeted her.  She sighed softly.

 

You were right again.

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