Loving Destiny

 

Disclaimer:  These characters do not belong to me, but to the writers and producers of Roswell

Spoilers:  After Chant Down Babylon, changes happening where Max is successfully rescued, and Michael was the one who broke up with Maria.

Pairings:  You’ll have to wait and see!

Pronunciation Guide: Kedra (Ke – drah)

                                                Kedrans (Ke – drahns)

                                                Kedar (Ke – dar)

                                                Iturians (I – tur – rians)

                                                Fadila (Fa – dee – la)

                                                Alaric (Ah – lair – ic)

                                                Andaria (An – dar – ia)

                                                Radim (Ra – deem)

                                                Hakan (Ha – kahn)

                                                Medgio (Med – gee – o)

                                                Muna (Mew – na)

                                                Steren (St- air – en)

                                                Pilan (Pi – lahn)

                                                Saren Dari (S - air – ren Dahr – ee)

                                                Barak (B - air – rack)

                                                Riazia (Ree – ah – zee – a)

                                                Hanar (Ha – nar)           

Author’s notes:      Queen Fadilia Kedar: Max/Isabel’s mother

                                        King Alaric Kedar: Max/Isabel’s father

                                        Andaria: Tess’ mother

                                        Radim:  Tess’ father

                              Kedrans: race from which Royal Four descended

                                        Iturians: race from which Khivar descended, and overthrew and killed Zan and the Kedrans

 

 

Chapter Thirty Five

 

***

Love is much like a wild rose,
Beautiful and calm,
But willing to draw blood in its defense

                                                                                                      - Mark Overby

***

 

Kissed Michael.  She had almost kissed Michael.  The warmth of his lips on hers lingered, as she pressed them together distractedly. 

 

This was not happening.

 

~~~

 

Michael stared at the bathroom door debating whether he should try to talk to her or if it was best to leave it alone.  Frozen in indecision, Michael turned on his heel and went back to the living room.

 

~~~

 

Once Tess had regained her composure, she extracted her arms from around Max’s neck.  She cleared her throat in awkwardness.  “I’m sorry,” Tess whispered as she looked up at Max’s confused expression.

 

Max shook his head.  “N-no,” he stammered.  “Don’t be.”  Max ran both his palms nervously down his thighs.  “What happened?”

 

Tess swallowed, thinking back to the vision, or dream.  She hadn’t decided what it was.  It was so vivid, as if Zander had been calling for her.  As she weighed the decision of whether to tell Max, or wait until she was sure it wasn’t some dream she subconsciously concocted because she missed Zander so much; Tess shook her head and laughed.  “It was nothing,” she lied.  “Just a dumb dream.”  Tess pulled away from Max, sliding off the bed and shaking off the memory of her son’s cry.

 

“It was more than a dream Tess,” Max frowned, “you woke up in a sweat.”

 

Tess wrapped her arms around herself and stared out at the crisp morning view.  “I told you,” she chided.  “It was nothing.”  Suddenly Tess turned around and stared curiously at Max.  “What are you doing here anyway?”

 

Max opened his mouth to say something, but from the expression on his face, Tess knew that if he did indeed say anything, it would be a lie.  But he didn’t.  He closed his mouth and lowered his gaze. 

 

There was a moment of silence before they both heard a loud slam of a door in the hallway.  They looked at each other peculiarly, and then turned their gaze to the door.  “What do you think that was?” Max asked.

 

Tess was relieved that he used this opportunity to change the subject.  “I don’t know.  Who’s here?”

 

“Isabel,” Max answered.  “She came over with me.”  Then Max turned back and looked at the door.  “It couldn’t have been Michael,” Max said, as he reasoned logically as to who slammed the door.  “Do you think it was Isabel?”

 

Now Tess knew something was up.  “Why are you and Isabel here?” she asked pointedly.  When she had woken up from the nightmare it was like a dream, seeing Max hovering over her, worried about her.  But now Tess knew Max would never be there without some ulterior motive.

 

Max got up from the bed and stood staring silently at her.  “I want to know why Isabel and Michael told me that Liz is the reason I almost died,” he blurted out.

 

Tess swallowed hard; the unexpected truth coming from Max surprised her.  As a million thoughts ran through her mind, Tess cleared her throat and bit her lip.  “Do you really want to know?”

 

Max nodded his head slowly, though the expression on his face was hesitant.  “Yes,” he whispered.

 

Tess turned around and once again stared out at the morning horizon.  “When I found out from Nicholas that you were sick…dying, I couldn’t believe it.  I had to keep myself from wiping that smirk off of his smug repugnant face.”  Taking a breath, Tess turned around and looked over at Max, who stood listening intently.  “He said that it was ‘ironic’ that you were dying because of Liz.”

 

“So you went on the words of a known liar and alien who wanted to kill us all?” Max asked calm but skeptical.

 

Tess shook her head irritably.  “No Max!” she spat.  “I wasn’t that stupid.  God, sometimes I don’t know what you take me for!”  This was hard for her.  She knew that Max was scrutinizing every detail of the story.  Part of her was afraid she would forget some of the details, or mix things up, making her story -- the truth -- a lie in his eyes.  “Do you want me to tell you this or not?” she asked.

 

Max took a deep breath and nodded his head.  “Yes.  Go on.”

 

Tess became restless as Max’s brooding eyes were locked onto her.  “Well as I said, Nicholas told me that you were dying, which I already knew.  I could feel this kind of numb feeling.  And sometimes I would black out.  It was weird, I didn’t understand what it meant, but it seemed to make sense once Nicholas revealed his little secret.”  She continued to describe her conversation with Nicholas and her search for a nurse for Zander, her discovery of Maia and Andaria.  The memories came back one by one as she focused on the images and the discovery of her mother.  “I walked into that room and there was…there was my mother,” Tess said incredulously, as if she were seeing Andaria again for the first time.

 

She looked up at Max, expecting to see him bored and unimpressed with her attempt to invoke in him the idea and feeling of meeting someone whom she had dreamed about for a lifetime.  Instead Max’s eyes were clouded, as if he understood what it meant to her.  Tess licked her lips and smiled and returned to the story.  “She told me that she had been waiting for me…for our return.”  She paused hoping that would mean something to Max, but instead Max averted his eyes as her eyes gazed longingly at him, as if the thought made him uncomfortable. 

 

“Well,” Tess said, shrugging her shoulders back and regaining her composure again.  “She brought me to this woman named Dalia.  Apparently she is one of the leading ‘architects’,” she paused as Max frowned and then clarified, “scientists, in human terms, on Antar.  She was presented with the knowledge that you were sick and dying in fact.”

 

“How could she know?” Max asked in confusion.  “How could anyone know on Antar that I was sick?”

 

Tess rolled her eyes.  “They keep tabs on us Max.  As if they wouldn’t?” she said dubiously.  “Can I continue?”  Max nodded and waved his hand at her, gesturing her to finish.  “Well,” Tess sighed, “Dalia explained that when you healed Liz, there was some genetic flaw in her DNA that was somehow triggered by your powers.”  Tess looked up at Max to make sure he was following.  Max’s head bobbed slowly up and down, urging her to go on.  “Human genetics are somehow modified when our powers manipulate their genes to heal them.”

 

“So?  How does that have anything to do with Liz causing my sickness?”

 

Tess steeled herself for the upcoming onslaught, as she was about to tell him the harsh truth.  “When you slept with Liz, it triggered some kind of genetic mutation within you.  Apparently it sped up the manifestation of Liz’s powers in her, and for you it had an adverse reaction.”

 

Max ran his fingers through his hair.  It was complicated.  Genes, mutation – was he supposed to be able to comprehend all of this?  How could he trust what Tess was telling him, to be the truth?  “I don’t know,” Max finally said, digesting her story.  “I don’t know what to believe.  You say this, Dalia, told you all of this.  How can I trust that you’re not lying to me?”

 

Tess flinched.  His words stung.  How many more times would she hear that question?  How much more hurt could she take from this man she loved with all of her heart?  The same questions swirled within her.

 

Tess had one more chance to be with the Max, to be with the man she had watched die in her arms in another life.  But this was a different life, a different time – maybe she was a fool to hang on to someone else’s memories, maybe Max was right.  “You don’t,” Tess said stiffly, swallowing the tears that had welled up at the doubt in her mind.  Feeling stifled in Michael’s small cramped bedroom, Tess began to look through the unkempt drawers of the dresser, which stood a few feet from the bed.  She needed a clean t-shirt.

 

“What are you doing?” Max asked curiously.

 

Tess shook her head irritably.  “I’m going to brush my teeth and get changed.  Is that okay with you?”

 

“But we were in the midd…”  Before Max finished his sentence, Tess grabbed the cold brass knob and walked out of the room.

 

~~~

 

A loud knock on the door startled Isabel from her muddled thoughts.  “Who is it?” Isabel called, her voice strained.

 

“Can I get in there?” Tess’ voice rose, as if asking a question, though it seemed more like a demand.

 

“I’m not finished,” Isabel replied quickly, her heart raced in fear at the thought of having to leave her makeshift sanctuary.  She wasn’t ready to face the awkwardness that would most likely be between her and Michael.  Her eyes darted around the room hoping Tess would take a hint.  She didn’t.

 

“Well I can’t wait.”  There was a pause.  Isabel hoped it was a good sign.  There was mumbling at the door, then Tess said loudly, “You don’t have to leave.  Just let me in.”  Isabel reluctantly unlocked the door and was taken aback at the force Tess used to push her way in. 

 

“Excuse me!” Isabel exclaimed dubiously.

 

Tess rolled her eyes at Isabel and closed the door behind her. She picked up a clear yellow toothbrush, quickly squeezing a bead of toothpaste on the thin bristles, and began swirling it in her mouth. Isabel furrowed her brow and scoffed.  “This is what couldn’t wait?”

 

Tess looked over Isabel who glared indignantly at her.  “And what were you doing that was so important?” Her blue eyes looked at Isabel up and down.

 

“I’m trying to think,” Isabel said irritably, as she leaned up against the bathroom wall.

 

“Yeah, well I’ve got a thing or two on my mind too.”

 

“Oh, I’m sorry, should I care?” Isabel knew she was being harsh, but she couldn’t handle Tess’ sarcasm today of all days.

 

The blonde hybrid, who looked like one of those porcelain china dolls, even when she just woke up leaned over the sink and spit.  “You know,” Tess mumbled, running the brush under the tap and placing it back in its stand, “I understand you’re under a lot of stress lately but there are other people with other problems.”  She turned around with her back against the sink, her narrow eyes studying Isabel.

 

“Really?” Isabel scoffed.  “Your husband betrayed you to people who would rather dissect me to find out how I tick than to interrogate me?”  She folded her arms across her chest.  My bad,” Isabel pouted in disgust.

 

Tess hopped up onto the small counter and shook her head.  “Do you really want to trade sob stories?” the blonde asked incredulously.  “Because it doesn’t compare to mine.”

 

“I was born in a pod chamber.”

 

“Been there, done that,” Isabel sighed.  “We all know that sob story.  So what about it?”

 

Tess shrugged.  “Fine.  I’m in love with my ‘husband’ who can’t stand me and my son is on another planet.  I have only a short time to convince all of you, who, by the way, could care less about our home planet, to come back and help free our people.  My mother, whom I’ve just met for the first time, is convinced that I can do it.  I keep on having these nightmares about failing my mother who has waited all of these years for a dream that is, just that, a dream; and I’m scared to death that Khivar is going to kill Zander.” 

 

Isabel watched Tess intently as she finished her little rant.  The more the facts came out, the less anger and resentment she felt for the brusque blonde hybrid.  The fair complexion began to show signs of wear and worry lines.  Her shoulders were slouched forward and she didn’t have that same cocky smirk on her face.  “I suppose that might be a better sob story,” Isabel admitted stiffly.

 

Tess, who had been staring at mindlessly at the tiled floor, peered up to look at Isabel.  Her corners of her pouty full lips curled into a miniscule smirk.  Isabel swallowed, thinking horrible thoughts, chiding herself, for even thinking of laughing with the woman who murdered Alex, but couldn’t.  They both burst out laughing.

 

“Look,” Tess sighed, after regaining her composure.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to barge in here.  It’s just, well, Max was just getting to me.”

 

Isabel frowned as she wiped the tears that were sliding down her face from laughing.  “What do you mean?”

 

“I told him why Liz is dangerous to him and he just wouldn’t believe me,” she sighed.  “I’m trying to tell him something that will save his life and he says he can’t trust me.”

 

Isabel shrugged.  “Do you blame him?”

 

Tess swallowed.  “Look, I know you guys hate me for what I did before I left, but there’s stuff you don’t know.  Things about that night that couldn’t be helped,” she said, waving her hands in frustration.  “And I wish I could tell you, I wish you could believe me when I say that I was only trying to do what was best for all of us.”

 

Isabel felt her heart tighten when Tess spoke about the night of Alex’s death.  As much as she felt connected to the woman, there would always be a part of her that would never forget that she was the reason Alex was dead.  “Can we not talk about that?” Isabel whispered, lowered her head, as her eyes beginning to tear up.

 

Her alien female counterpart nodded.  “I didn’t mean to bring it up,” Tess apologized.  “It’s just, I’m not here with any ulterior motive.  I’m being honest.  I’ve told you why I’m here and why I’m not leaving.”

 

Isabel nodded.  “I’m just not sure that’s what you’re going to end up with Tess,” she said sadly.  Tess and Antar were in for a rude awakening.  Plans had changed and the Royal Four didn’t exist.  As much as Isabel believed that she had told them the truth about what she was doing here and why she was staying, there seemed no possible way for Tess to convince them that Antar was where they belonged.

 

~~~

 

“Did you get any answers?” a voice asked.

 

Max turned his attention from the closed door, to the living room, where Michael was brooding.  “What?”  Max frowned.  He studied Michael for a moment; he knew that something had gone on while he was in the room with Tess.

 

Michael shrugged and walked over to where the living room met with the entrance of the hallway.  He leaned against the wall, his arms folded across his chest.  “So did Tess give you any answers?” he asked morosely.

 

Max raised his eyebrows in uncertainty.  “She gave me answers, but whether I can believe them or not is another thing.”

 

“Is that what got her in a huff?” Michael asked.

 

Max walked into the living room, knowing that Tess needed a little time to cool off.  “She’s tired of us not believing her and questioning everything she says,” Max sighed.  “But how can we not?  After all she’s put us through, how can we just trust her blindly?”

 

Michael turned around and sighed.  “I don’t know man, but there must be some truth to it Maxwell.”  The tall blonde paused and tilted his head curiously.  “What did she tell you?  We never got a full explanation.  She just told us to keep Liz away from you.”

 

Max threw his hands in the air.  “I don’t know.  She rambled on about genetics and how our powers linger and intermingle with the human DNA…”  He had to sit down for a moment.  Thinking about it again just made his head ache.  Max looked behind him and pulled a folding chair underneath him, and sat down.

 

It seemed to make sense, with the amount of biology, chemistry and science education he had received from Roswell High’s academic elite.  “It just can’t be right Michael.  Liz and I, we are right together,” he looked up at Michael, “and now she’s supposed to be lethal to my health?  Don’t you think that’s a little convenient?”

 

Over the short amount of time he had had to think this over, the more it sounded like this was something Tess wanted him to believe.  And Max would have gone with his instinct, except this nagging feeling he had in the pit of his stomach, like some other side of him telling him that he was wrong.  It was an internal struggle that he had been dealing with the moment Tess was back in his life, but this time, it was stronger and more intense.  Max couldn’t describe it; it felt like another person was struggling to be heard.

 

“Max, there’s something else you don’t know.  I think Tess must have forgotten to mention it, but did you notice two hand prints on your chest?”

 

Max nodded.  He had.  It was something he had wanted to mention to Tess, but then she became upset and stormed out of the room.  “Do you know what that’s about?”  Michael nodded.  “Well then?” Max said, waiting patiently for him to explain the phenomenon.

 

“It was Liz.”

 

Max frowned.  “What do you mean, ‘It was Liz’?”

 

Michael’s eyes lowered until it seemed that he was admiring the lovely beige carpeting that lined the living room floor.  “She tried to heal you,” he muttered.

 

Max leaned forward and shook his head, “What did you say?  It sounded like you said, ‘Liz tried to heal me’?”

 

Michael nodded irritably.  “She did.  Liz tried to heal you and it almost cost you your life,” he blurted out.

 

Max laughed and thought he was joking.  “You almost had me there,” Max exclaimed.  “Liz doesn’t have the ability to heal anyone.”

 

Michael looked at him incredulously.  “Have you talked with your little girlfriend lately Maxwell?  There’s a lot of things you don’t know about, and one of them being the abilities Liz does and does not have.”

 

“So you’re not kidding?”

 

Michael shook his head slowly, maintaining eye contact.  “You were dead for all we knew,” he said somberly.  “I was taking you to the hospital when your heart stopped and you got all cold.”  Max swallowed at Michael’s description of his death.  “None of us were talking.  I left Isabel and Jesse in the Granolith chamber when suddenly a white light appeared and there was Tess.  If she hadn’t gotten there, you’d still be dead.”

 

“But how?  How did Liz’s powers grow so fast?”

 

Michael again shrugged his broad shoulders, which began to irritate Max.  “I don’t know.  We had told her, Isabel and I, that she should under no circumstances touch you.”  He ruffled his shaggy hair and rolled his eyes at the memory.  “But she had it in her head that she was supposed to save you, instead of the fact that she was the one who hurt you in the first place.  So when she was on watch one night, she tried to heal you,” he sighed.  “We found her lying unconscious and you weren’t even breathing, though your heart was beating.”

 

“This is the weirdest thing I’ve ever heard.”

 

“Well it’s the truth,” Michael stated.  He turned away and looked towards the bathroom.  Max followed his gaze.  “I just knew she had something to do with it,” he muttered.

 

Max stiffened at the comment; true as it may be, it had nothing to do with Liz.  She never meant to hurt him; it was one of those unexpected freak-of-nature things that she couldn’t control.  “Well you can’t blame her,” he said defensively.  “I had a little something to do with it.”

 

Michael lifted his head and frowned.  “You had something to do with the fact that she doesn’t listen to us when we tell her to stay away from you and not to use her powers on you?” he exclaimed.  Michael shook his head in disbelief.  “No, I don’t think so Maxwell.  She should have known better.”

 

Max gritted his teeth and bit back any words that he might regret saying later.  Michael didn’t seem to understand what it was like.  He had thought that his relationship would open Michael’s eyes to the fact that you couldn’t choose who you loved.  “I wonder what’s keeping Isabel and Tess in there,” Max said uneasily, hoping to change the subject.

 

There had to be a way to fix this.  Liz was the life that he had chosen.  How could he get that through to all of them?

Next Chapter

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