Nuriko sighed in disappointment as he changed into his nightclothes and prepared for bed. The Suzaku summoning ceremony had failed. And what a bust it had been! He and the other shichiseishi had practically been killed by Seiryuu seishi Amiboshi, who had then died while trying to escape. Now they had to recover some item called the shinzaho in order to call Suzaku. Who knew how long that might take, and how difficult that might be?

Taiitsu-kun had given each of the seishi items (except for poor Tamahome) that were supposed to increase their power. Now Nuriko examined the bracelets she had given him. They were beautifully sculpted, and he felt a strange aura eminating from them, but he didn't see how they could relate to his strenth or help enhance it in any way.

And then there was his wish. The wish that was supposed to make the past eight years worthwhile, end the secrecy and self-delusion that had plagued him. The wish that might finally make him into someone Hotohori could love and marry. Because that was what he wanted, wasn't it?

But now it would have to wait. For the next little while at least Nuriko would still be a man, in the physical sense at least. Nuriko looked down at the night shirt he was wearing, a long feminine one that reached his ankles, unlike the shirt and pants the other seishi wore. He hoped the summoning of Suzaku would happen quickly and that his wish would come true the next time, because frankly, he was feeling less and less feminine each day.

No, there was no way Nuriko would be able to sleep with this issue troubling his mind. Fresh air, that was what he needed. He stepped out of his room onto the balconey, where a stiff breeze ruffled his clothes and hair. It was bordering on chilly, but Nuriko found it refreshing.

Out of the corner of his eye, Nuriko saw another figure resting at the balcony several feet away. Turning to get a better look, he recognized unmistakable flame-colored hair shining in the moonlight.

"Ne, Tasuki, shouldn't you be in bed by now?" Nuriko said, forcing his voice to sound cheerful.

Tasuki gave a start and turned to face Nuriko. He was beaming, a look of almost child-like excitement on his face.

"Couldn't sleep. I'm too excited after all the stuff that happened today. I can't wait to get practicing on my new tessen tomorrow, and going for the shinzaho will be good too. I'd like to get to kick some Seiryuu ass!"

Nuriko nodded, then turned his head as tears stung at his eyes. That Tasuki should be so happy about the same events that had disappointed him so was...unfair!

Tasuki's eyes narrowed as his saw the older seishi turn away. His experience with five older sisters had made him perceptive enough to notice the gleam of wetness at the corner of Nuriko's eye before he'd looked away. Tasuki took a few steps toward Nuriko, concerned. "Hey, Nuriko, is something bothering you?"

Nuriko turned to Tasuki and smiled, a little too hurriedly. "Me? Oh, I'm okay, I'm okay! Don't worry about me." Just then, a particularly strong breeze came over Nuriko. He didn't notice that the lacing on his night shirt had become undone, but he felt goosebumps prickle up on his skin as he sneezed and shivered. For a moment the two stood silently, Nuriko's small frame looking ever so vulnerable as he rubbed his own arms trying to warm up, while Tasuki looked on, unable to think of what to say.

"Are you upset about what happened today with the summoning ceremony?" Tasuki finally asked. "You had a wish you'd requested, didn't you?"

Nuriko couldn't bring himself to face Tasuki just then. He felt so stupid! What could he say? Yes, I'd wanted to be a woman, but it didn't work out. He nodded in response, keeping his head down. "I thought that if I...I could be something else...Hotohori could forget...." his voice broke as he sobbed, "forget about Miaka...and love me..."

Nuriko's shoulders shuddered as tears streamed down his face and he looked dejectedly out onto the black lake. Tasuki closed the gap between the two men and placed his arm protectively around Nuriko, cursing his soft spot for tears. Nuriko turned towards Tasuki and cried softly into his nightshirt, sobs racking his body.

"$*&%, you're freezing," Tasuki murmered, feeling the goosebumps on Nuriko's arms. "Let's go inside." He guided Nuriko into the nearest doorway, and immediately Nuriko was struck by the warmth inside. He opened his eyes and recognized Tasuki's room. It was so warm in here! Even his own room had a draft sometimes.

Once inside, Tasuki held Nuriko once again until the last of his sobs subsided. Finally Nuriko pulled away and looked at Tasuki with gratitude, his eyes still wet. "Arigatou, Tasuki."

Tasuki gazed at Nuriko, a reflective expression on his face. "You know," he said absently, "I might know the reason why you're so cold," indicating the untied night shirt Nuriko wore.

Nuriko looked down and cursed in his mind. Of course! How could he be so foolish? Thorougly embarrassed, he fumbled with the laces, trying to re-tie them, but his fingers tripped over one another and it was useless.

"Oi, Nuriko, what's eating you now? $%&@, it's no big deal. Lemme do it," Tasuki grumbled as he nimbly tightened the laces one by one and prepared to loop a loose bow. As he looked up he caught Nuriko's gaze and the two were startled at how close they now stood. In a move that surprised them both, Tasuki suddenly bent his head and touched Nuriko's lips with his own.

The two seishi remained chastely joined for a moment before Nuriko broke the kiss and took a step back. Tasuki sat down at the foot of his bed while Nuriko stood in front of him. "Nuriko," he began in a serious tone, "I think I understand how you feel. There is someone I care for, too, someone I've never told and may never have the opportunity to be with." Nuriko blinked in realization as the image of a blue-haired bandit flashed through his mind.

"It's hard to go on without him," Tasuki continued, "but at least I don't have to face him every day like you with Hotohori." Tasuki began to bite his fingernails, clearly uncomfortable. "Anyways, what I'm tryin' to get at is, if you need a shoulder to cry on, or a friend, or anything - " Tasuki looked pointedly at Nuriko, " - I'll be here for you."

Nuriko kept his gaze fixed firmly on the floor as his eyes threatened to fill with tears again. He...he didn't want this. Wasn't he being unfaithful to Hotohori? Hotohori...who didn't love him, but maybe would someday? Did he love Hotohori? At one time he definitely thought he did, but now he wasn't so sure anymore.

And Tasuki? Nuriko liked him a lot. He had more than proven himself as a seishi, and his loyalty to Miaka and the others was beyond admirable. He was funny too, always making naive and clueless observations, so that Nuriko often had to stifle a laugh before appropriately pounding him into a wall. And it was Tasuki's warm, strong arms that had embraced him earlier, when he surely would have cried himself to sleep, alone. Nuriko suspected he'd rather be here, now, than go back to his room and spend the night by himself.

That decided it. Impulsively, Nuriko closed his eyes and kissed Tasuki firmly on the mouth, wrapping his arms around the ex-bandit's neck and threading his fingers through the flame-colored hair. Tasuki returned the kiss and deepened it, standing while he placed his hands on either side of Nuriko's face and caressing the soft skin. He broke the kiss and moved his fingers to the laces on Nuriko's night shirt, undoing what he had just tied as he feathered kisses on Nuriko's collarbone. Nuriko's knees were threatening to buckle and he grabbed at Tasuki's shoulders to steady himself. Suddenly he felt the redhead's lips break contact with his body and Nuriko's eyes flew open. Tasuki was gazing at him somberly, as though he had realized something profound and was about to share it.

"Are you sure you're up for this?" Tasuki asked.

Nuriko giggled at the unintended innuendo. "Well, actually, since you asked..." He laughed out loud as the ex-bandit's face reddened and he sputtered in a moment of super-deformed rage, "Damn you! You know that's not what I meant!" Tasuki became serious again and he took Nuriko's hands in his. "I meant, are you willing to go through with this?"

Nuriko blinked at the ex-bandit's obvious concern. He did recognize a glitch he'd have to deal with. He'd been busy for the past year pining after Hotohori, but as a woman. He'd good-naturedly accepted the barbs from his fellow seishi about being a "gay boy", but he'd never really given much thought to the fact that he was indeed male. Now he was in a position to be with Tasuki, but it would be as a man, not a woman. Was he willing to go through with it?

Nuriko straightened his back and looked at Tasuki with determination. "Yes. Yes, I'm ready to go through with this."

He closed his eyes and allowed Tasuki to lead him back towards the bed.

Nuriko awoke to the sound of light snoring. It was fairly dark in the room, indicating that the sun had not completely risen. Disoriented, he tried to remember where he was, whose arm was wrapped tightly around his waist, whose body lay next to his. Swiveling his head, he caught a glimpse of a red lock of hair and it started to come back to him. Tasuki, he thought, smiling. Crying in his arms on the balcony, the tender kiss they had shared, the things they had told each other that they wouldn't share with anyone else...and...more...

"Ohayo gozaimasu, Tasuki," Nuriko whispered softly, brushing a kiss on Tasuki's cheek, careful not to disturb his slumber. "Arigatou." Then he slipped quietly out of bed, put his night gown back on, and went back to his room before the others awoke.

All characters © Watase Yuu, Flower Comics, Bandai, etc., etc. I'm just a kid. I get nothing out of this except poor grades from lack of studying. You don't want to sue me.
Story © 1998 Meri.
Last edited 06/22/98.

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