I'll Cover You
Indigo
***
"What is love?" The question fairly startled Lance. He had been lying with his head on JC's lap,
on the couch in the living room of the apartment they shared, watching Who Wants to be a Millionaire.
And then this question had come from the mouth of the person he loved most in the world, and
pretty much knocked all thoughts of Regis Philbin out of his mind.
"What?" he answered, mainly for stalling purposes.
JC ran his fingers through Lance's hair, and kissed him on the forehead. "You know, LOVE.
What is it exactly? Because, see, I looked it up the other day, and it said something about,
'between a man and a woman.' And if that's true, then..."
Lance, finally catching on, finished his sentence for him. "...what we have isn't love." He sat
up, suddenly in tune with his boyfriend's philosophical mood. He cupped JC's face in his hands,
looked into his eyes, and said softly, "Don't ever believe that,Jace. This HAS to be love. I
know it is. If it's not...well, I don't know anything, if this isn't love."
JC paused before answering. His beautiful face broke into a grin. "Okay. Okay. Now come on, it's
almost time for the million dollar question," he jerked his head towards the television, and they
went back to watching.
***
Lance lay in bed, thinking over what had happened in the living room earlier that night. There had
been many, many times in the past where he'd started to doubt his and JC's relationship. He had,
after all, grown up in a rigid Christian environment where being with another man resulted in
nothing less than eternal damnation. He could still remember the day he'd told his mother about
his and JC's relationship...
"...no, Mom, you misunderstood me. JC and I are dating. We're...together."
She'd stood in shocked silence for almost two minutes before she broke down and cried. She'd never
been able to look at her son the same way after that.
And Lance had never really managed to shake off the nagging feeling that this was somehow wrong.
He was able to bury it, really, most of the time. God knows, he loved JC so much it hurt sometimes.
He loved him like he could never love anyone else, ever. But the foundation that had been laid for
him most of his life wasn't so easily destroyed. "Thou shalt not lie with mankind..." or something
like that, the verse said.
"Hah," Lance thought wryly, as he glanced at JC's sleeping form next to him, one arm draped over
Lance's chest. He shifted in his sleep and gave a sigh of contentment. Lance couldn't help smiling...
JC looked so peaceful, so oblivious to his love's sudden bout of insomnia.
"Why can't I just let it be?" He knew he wasn't going to get any sleep, not tonight at least. Lance
got up from the bed, slipped through the bedroom door and went to sit on the living room couch.
He turned on the TV, on mute so as not to wake JC, but he wasn't really watching. He was thinking.
Thinking about everything, from the moment he felt those first stirrings in his soul, to the present,
where he was happy, unbelievably happy, with Joshua Scott Chasez. But if he was so happy, why was
he doubting right now, at this moment? How could he doubt something so real, so true? He didn't have
the answers to those questions. And that was what was keeping him up.
"Lance, are you okay, baby?" JC had come into the room so quietly, Lance hadn't even noticed he was
there until he had spoken. He sat down on the couch next to him and wrapped his arms around Lance,
leaning his head on Lance's shoulder.
"Yeah, I couldn't sleep," he answered, kissing his boyfriend's head lightly. "Did I wake you? I'm
sorry..."
JC shook his head. "No, no, I just...woke up and you were gone, and you know I can't really sleep
without you there..." he trailed off, slightly embarassed at his words.
Lance suddenly felt all doubt leave his mind. Had he really doubted that this was right?
Just knowing someone felt that way about him, couldn't sleep without him there...it was the most
amazing thing in the world. "C'mon, Josh. Let's get back to bed." He took his hand, intertwining
their fingers, and led him to where they both belonged.
***
fiction