Blog '05

WARNING: this particular section contains traces of bad language.. =P

Another summer day has come and gone away...
~~>Friday 30.12.05<~~
so.... we're almost right at the very end of december.. teetering on the brink of a new year. ah.. who knows what's in store? *sigh*
that means it's that time of the year again.. mm. the time of the year to sit around and reflect on what little you've accomplished. and feel lousy about the whole thing because you realise that all in all, you really haven't achieved jack-diddly-squat. well that's how i feel now anyway.
life's.. not fulfilling. well i guess it isn't life itself that isn't fulfilling. because really, when it comes down to it, it's all about how much you make of it yourself. great. so it's my own fault that i don't have a lovely, glowing feeling of self-satisfaction at the end of the year. hmm.. -__-"
i don't feel like i've accomplished much this year or in fact, now that i look back, any other year at all. it's quite sad really. i'll be graduating next year. how scary is that? o_o and what do i have to show for it? pretty much nothing. a couple of mediocre grades tucked under my belt, a social life that leaves a lot to be desired, and a circle of friends that could stand to be widened. drastically widened. i want to go out and meet more people, make more friends, do interesting things, break the mould. before i get too old, before it's too late. my life seems to consist of one long, monotonous cycle - work [when i'm lucky], uni, sunnybank, pearl tea. work, uni, sunnybank, pearl tea. work, uni, sunnybank, pearl tea. boooooring! routine is nice and reassuring sometimes.. but then again sometimes it's terribly boring. *sigh*.. how depressing.
mm.. enough of that.. for now i guess.
went to garbo today.. =S [uh oh, here comes bad news =P] i'd like to just reiterate now how much i loathe that place. i drove around for about half an hour, circling the parking lots like a vulture hunting for a space. eventually i just gave up in frustration and parked the poor car upstairs in the full sun. ordinarily i would never venture out to garden city at that time of day, but romeo had invited me out to play monopoly [lol yes =P of all the strange things to do on a hot summer's day.. he said he'd had the urge to give his monopoly board a workout]. since i very rarely get to spend time with the guy, i made the effort to get out of my comfort zone =] LOL. and so that's how we whiled most of the day away.. sitting in the cool air of the library, playing monopoly. i met this lovely chick, jean, who's romeo's friend [she pretty much thrashed both our asses by buying out one entire side of the board and then proceeding to build hotels on ALL of her streets -__-"]. turns out she goes to my uni, we're doing the same course, and we'll be doing the same elective unit next year.. what are the odds of that haha. something to look forward to =] *nods*
[on a distracted note, i'm feeling rather touched by the nice things people have done lately.. it's often the nice little things that count, some things i've only just noticed recently, but yeah.. little things.. today when i was struggling, romeo bought me mayfair [yes, the most expensive one on the board =P the one that produces droolworthy rent profit =P] in exchange for one of my other crummy properties. it clearly wasn't a fair exchange, but he was nice enough to help me out, i think because i was losing terribly and he felt sorry for me haha.. how nice.. =] and yesterday i went out to eat with chan [may god have mercy on us all.. -__-" i know, i know.. it's awfully hypocritical, after i made a big deal about not wanting anything to do with any of them anymore. and i wouldn't really say that we're chummy, especially not after that whole lying thing earlier this year. but he was nice enough to kill time with me, so i don't really have the right to be too bitchy. i'd say we're just acquaintances at the moment. acquaintances on friendly terms. nothing more than that, because i wouldn't be willing to invest any trust or anything like that into the relationship. i like distanced relationships like that, because it's not so in-depth that you could find yourself getting hurt or insulted by their actions.] hmm well anyway.. it was nice to eat lunch with someone who listens to what you want to eat beforehand, then tells the waitress for you. instead of just ordering their own food, then leaving you to sort out your own order after they've done theirs =].. yeah.. it's not a big deal, just a nice little thing i noticed^^]
anyway, back to the topic at hand.. after monopoly romeo had to get to work, and jean and i were joined by her friend.. none other than.... my long lost "cousin", babyface! it's a small world i guess =P it was nice to catch up with babyface, cuz even though i keep saying "we must catch up next holidays!", we never end up doing so.. kind of sad really, since we go waaay back.. and old friends are almost always the ones you should make the most time for.. *sigh*
we ate, wandered around some more, and i gave my endorphins a post-christmas present by buying some green apple liquorice from darrell lea.. *drool* hehe. they asked if i'd like to join them for their new year's eve celebrations tomorrow but i dunno.. i don't feel like battling the crowds for a half-decent fireworks vantage point for yet another year at southbank. and plus since i'll be working the whole day from 9am right up to closing time, i'll be horrendously tired and grouchy by the end of the day. but since i haven't made any plans to do anything it looks like i'll just be sitting around the house feeling sorry for myself. not really something i wanna be doing, although i shouldn't really care. going out isn't all that fun actually. the last few years weren't all that great.. basically we'd just drink, then wander around southbank all phased out, and get tired from all the walking. and fireworks are nice to watch, but after about ten minutes of craning your neck up to the sky at an uncomfortably unnatural angle, you start to feel tired and somewhat in pain. not much fun at all. aahh and i do not want a repeat of last year, like with krystle and her family. hmm. it seems anything with to do with krystle's family doesn't really.. turn out fun.. *cough*.. new year's.. melbourne trip.. running around doing all their little errands for them.. *cough*
speaking of which.. on christmas day, krystle and i went out for lunch. offhandedly, i asked how regan and her baby were. i guess that sort of gave her the impression that i wanted to see regan's baby? which is actually as far from the truth as you can get. frankly, i really don't care. i wouldn't call regan and myself anything more than acquaintances right now. from the way she acts, i get the impression she just doesn't care about anything that isn't central to her and her life. it used to bother me alot, because we were best friends in high school, and it was sad to think that we'd drifted so far apart that we don't even talk anymore. but really.. i'm past the point of caring now. her actions and her "don't care" attitude really don't appeal to me. so i'm perfectly happy with the way things are; that we lead separate lives, and god forbid our paths should ever cross one day.
but anyway.. krystle was like "next time regan comes over, i'll call you. so you can see her baby. okay?" i was like "uh.. yeah.. ooookay.. -__-"
yesterday, she called me up saying "regan's over at my house now..."
i told her that i was out, and hence kind of busy, and she asked who i was with. when i responded with "a friend", she sounded miffed about it. which kind of annoyed me, because what the hell.. what did she expect me to do? i was already out, and i wasn't about to drop everything and go running over to her place just to see regan and her bohemian love child. and who i go out with and what i do with my time is my business, not anyone else's. i certainly don't care that she spends so much time with regan, or with anyone else for that matter. because that's none of my business in the first place.
*sigh* oh well.. it's nearly the end of the year.. don't wanna end this year on a begrudging note.
moving along.. jaclyn's away in melb atm =( which kinda sucks because that's one less person to go out and have fun with. and jaclyn is one of the few people i go out with on a regular basis. luckily it's not for too long though.. although when she goes away to vietnam for five weeks, that's reeeally guna suck. cuz it's such a long time =( lucky her though.. since she'll be spending new years in melb, which would be a nice change from boring old brisboner. mm.. how exciting! i wish i were somewhere far, far away.. how good would it be to spend new years somewhere different? o_O
along that note too.. everyone seems to have jetted off to many exciting places.. jaclyn in melbourne, sheannal's gone to singapore [although we don't really.. talk.. anymore, i'm still glad for him.. must be really nice and.. meaningful.. *sigh*], apparently frank's off in korea [when i heard this, i was insanely envious! =P i wish i could go to korea.. but i guess he deserves it though, since he finally finished uni this sem that just passed.. congratulations to him haha].. who else.. hmm.. gab's in korea too. lucky him as well. ah.. *envy*envy* keke
hmm anyway.. oh wow.. looks like this blog has turned out to be quite long.. hmm. oh well. it's my blog and i'll rant about things as i wish =P
i think i might sign off here, and grab some endorphin boosters [i.e. kimchi ramen and a sweet beverage of some sort.. *drool* =P], put on some k-pop, kick back, relax, and have a nice reminiscing session...
usually at the end of the year, i say "thank GOD this bitch-ass year is OVER!".. and that's something i've said for like the past 2 years in a row.. *sigh* but this time, i'm not going to say it all. because i really did have a fantastic year this year. and i'm really, really sorry that it's come to an end so quickly. there's a lot of things that i wish i could do all over again, and that i wish would just never end at all.. *sigh*.. but i guess there's nothing to do but keep on moving forward. forward, forward, ever forward.. =(
have a safe and happy new year sons.
and for the last time this year, this is uncle yenny signing out..

Set adrift on memory bliss... =]
~~>Tuesday 27.12.05<~~
keke maybe some people will recognise the title of this particular blog as a song by the backstreet boys from looong, long ago.. it's actually a half-decent song.. lol hoooray for oldschool-ness ^__~
wow.. so it's the 27th already! it seems the end of the year is fast approaching, and 2005 has flown by so, so, so incredibly quickly.. *sigh* the end of anything always brings on a bout of nostalgia and sentimentality for me, which is kind of sad.. i should really stop being so.. girly.. lol. i shouldn't get so fond of or attached to things, then i won't be so sad when they're over, or gone.. -__-
been reminiscing alot lately.. remembering things, people, events, that happened over the year.. funny stuff.. happy stuff.. sad stuff.. it's all in there somewhere.. memories that i wouldn't trade for the world =] ah yes.. memories, memories...
haha here's one incident in jap that i remember reeally well.. eveytime i think of it, it makes me smile keke. after the very first listening test, i moved seats to sit with maria in the back row because the noisyfucker patrol were going full blast again and i couldn't concentrate [she'd come in late and i'd been sandwiched between conway and yeejiun]. so anyways.. maria, glen and myself were just sitting there, heads down, concentrating on our worksheets. all of a sudden, we heard this loud "FUCK!" our heads snapped up to find jolly standing at our table, swiping furiously at her clothes. "spilt my milk!" she said angrily, then began swabbing at the milk on the desk.
kekeke i just think jolly is so cute.. she has the cutest voice and, combined with her asian accent, it's just bizarrely adorable when she swears. remembering that particular day always brings a smile to my face.
umm what else..
haha oh yeah.. maria hadn't turned up to the final jap exam and conway and i thought it was extremely strange, since he'd received a call on his mobile about 5 minutes before the exam asking where the exam room was. after the exam, we'd started walking back to the city when it suddenly dawned on us that something terrible could've happened to her. if she'd had every intention of coming to the exam five minutes beforehand, then what could've happened to her in that time?? we both knew she'd been functioning on virtually no sleep for the last few days, keeping herself awake by gulping down no-doz caffeine pills so she could cram right up to the very last minute.. since our exam room was on a level that could only be reached by stairs, or by taking a lift, we began to panick - what if she'd collapsed in one of the elevators, or in the stairwell, or even in the bathroom? [yes, being the pessimists we are, we naturally assumed the worst =P] we hurried all the way back to uni and began to frantically check all the staircases, the elevators, and even the bathroom cubicles for any sign of maria.. when we couldn't find her, and couldn't reach her on her mobile, we eventually had to give up. but only after conway realised that it was jolly who'd called his mobile, and not maria -__- and maria had just not turned up at all lol .__.
*sigh* there's a whole lot more i've been remembering of late that i haven't blogged about.. but time is quickly running short, so i might just stop here for now.. will continue this blog before the new year hopefully =]
later days sons!

Just some technicalities...
~~>Thursday 22.12.05<~~
well.. uncle yenny has been rather shitfaced lately, or in yennyism terms, 'feeling doghouse'. but that's okay.. i'm not here to rant or bitch about anything, just wanted to share some brief points before i sign off:
*belated thank you to schpen, 'mah aZn nigga' for the wonderful present.. it's lovely.. =]
*and another belated thank you to my underboss, m0eie, also for the wonderful present.. i'm lovin' it ^__~
and finally:
*here's some playlists i've been meaning to post up but hadn't quite gotten around to. spread the joy this christmas with these on your music player kaka ^__~ enjoy ^^

30 minute feel good - boost your endorphins with these uplifting songs.. guaranteed to have you nodding your head.. in a GOOD way, not a lame, tryhard way =P
1. 'Feeling Fine' - L'Arc en Ciel
2. 'Crazy About You' - Tension
3. 'Time Machine' - Shinhwa
4. 'Real Love Story' - Taebin ft. Se7en & Wheesung
5. 'Feel the Fate' - W-inds
6. 'Be Free' - Do As Infinity
7. 'C'est La Vie' - L'Arc en Ciel
8. 'Hotaru' - Nagai Masato

Ultimate Bop - awaken your silly, happy-go-lucky side.. boost your endorphins and get a smile on your face with these boppy songs =D
1. 'Eusha Eusha!' - Shinhwa
2. 'Haengbok' [Full of Happiness] - H.O.T
3. 'Loveable' - Kim Jong Gook
4. 'Just Once' - Kangta & IsakNJiyeon
5. 'Sula Yu Lampa de Yu Yan' [Allegory of Sula and Lampa] - David Tao

Tryhard w00t ^__~ - bring out the tryhard in YOU =P with these kind of beats, it's acceptable to nod your head like a lamer haha -__-"
1. 'Baby I Like You Like That' - Se7en
2. 'Take a Bow' - Fly To The Sky
3. 'Hey Dude' - Shinhwa [the song from the Coca Cola ad ^__~]
4. 'Flip Reverse' - Jang WooHyuk
5. 'Night Owl' - Eun JiWon
6. 'Strange' [aka 'Huai Ni Hai'] - Tension
7. 'Persona' - Kangta
8. 'Bump' - Lee MinWoo
9. 'Com' Back' - Sechskies
10. 'Passion' - Se7en

Ballads - misery loves company.. these songs are great for reminiscing to, and some will absolutely send a shiver down your spine..
1. 'Doll' - Shin Hyesung, Kangta & Lee JiHoon
2. 'I Loved You' [aka 'Haengbok Ha Gil'] - Kim Jong Gook
3. 'Never Ever' - Eun JiWon
4. 'Goodbye' - Fly To The Sky
5. 'Ai Wo Hai Shi Ta' [Do You Love Me Or Him] - David Tao
6. 'Dedicated to You' - W-inds
7. 'May I Love You' - Zhang Zhi Chen
8. 'Chook Bok' [some give me a translation for this pleeeease! =P] - Kang Sung Hoon
9. 'Agape' - Kangta
10. 'I Swear' - Shin HyeSung

more to come soon^^ till then, hope everyone has a merry christmas and gets loads of awesome presents.. w00t! sacriligious! w00t! haha =P

Three cheers for impulse shopping!
~~>Tuesday 20.12.05<~~ happy b'day to denise
had the day off from work today.. i wanted to make the most of it, but by the time i'd woken up, finished cleaning my fish tanks and everything else, half the day had already gone. what a waste.. *sigh* i did call up a couple of people but no one was free to do anything. so rather than let my only day off go to waste, i set out for the shops with my bestest buddy, me, myself and i .__.
it's a shame, but i think i'm quite addicted to going out. not going out as in "let's hit the clubs, get drunk off our faces and make asses of ourselves while random strangers try to grope us up", but going out as in getting out of the house to anywhere but work or uni. this isn't particularly a good thing because i'm exceptionally good at wasting money everytime i go out. i know, i know.. i said earlier i'm trying to save up as much as possible and stick to some kind of half-decent budget, but today this incredible, almighty urge to splurge was engulfing my body [i'm going to put that down to being in a rather unhealthy mood for most of the day].
i guess retail therapy can work a little for increasing your endorphin levels? o_O i love wandering around asian shops looking at all their novelty asianised food products and whatnot. i think i could devote a substantial amount of my free time to this activity, except for the unfortunate problem of impulse buying. when you're supposed to be on a tight budget, window shopping is fine, spending is not. so anyway.. window shop, i did. and impulse buy, i did -__-
on the bright side, i gave my endorphin-producing glands an early christmas present by investing in a whole range of kimchi products - kimchi ramen [i bought this product because of my great fondness of kimchi, and also because i recognised the brand.. nongshim!! for which shinhwa did a commercial some time ago keke.. *drool*], kimchi snack crisps and other goodies, along with a nice selection of confectionery, corn chips and dip.. *drool*
hmm.. that being said, i think i'll go indulge in my snacks now hah.. since now's as good a time as any.. =(

Nostalgia strikes back..
~~>Sunday 18.12.05<~~
hmm.. this morning i woke up to find a message on my phone from none other than.... noisyfucker 2 =P yes, that's right.. even a bajillion kilometers away, he still manages to haunt me haha -__- in my groggy, half-asleep state i was tripping out; for a second he had me thinking some kind of ironic miracle had taken place and i was ready to abuse him for somehow sneaking back into the country and not telling me. then i recognised the country code on the phone number and realised that he'd sent an international sms.. to say happy birthday =] probably the most thoughtful thing he's ever done^^ haha semi-ironic joke there =P *sigh* but how nice! *feels incredibly honoured*
hmm.. it was a really nice surprise. and brought back a lot of memories.. in the most ironic way possible hah. inside "joke" i guess. plays on some of the nicest memories i have of the guy.
ah.. and here comes that sickening bitter-sweet feeling of nostalgia again. *sigh*
...
wow that was so bizarre.. just as i was in the middle of blogging, who should rock up on msn but yeejiun himself.. o_O amazing.. the guy never comes online but the one time he does, the timing is impeccable! O_o haha or MAYBE my super psychic abilities allow me to summon people just by thinking about them kekeke >=D *rubs hands in evil glee*
well, that's put me in a pretty good mood after an otherwise craptacular day. work was horrendously boring, and once again i was left by myself in the luggage department for most of the day, talking to the suitcases and travel adaptors -__- i guess i shouldn't complain though, since it's good money for standing around and doing pretty much nothing. yeah.. good money to save^^
hmm.. on a completely randomized note, today for the first time in yeeears i had a fillet-o-fish burger from mcdonalds.. and MAN was it good! ohh sooo good! haha i don't know what compelled me to buy one for lunch, but me thinks uncle yenny has found a new favourite burger! *drool* *drool* =P at least for now anyway, it's probably only a matter of time before i grow weary of it like i seem to do with so many things -__- but yes.. it was MOST delicious.. and i'm absolutely looooving the sauce. get this.. it's like maccas-style mayo [so, soooo creamy!!], but here's the BONUS: little chopped up bits of pickles mixed in!! mmmm *drool* *drool*.. hehe.. uncle yenny LOVES pickles ^__^
ahh maaaaan.. all this talk of food has made me hungry again >=( me thinks it's time to go downstairs and indulge in a second dinner haha.
later days sons ^__^

Happy days, people.. happy days..
~~>Saturday 17.12.05<~~
thank you to the people who kept me company today, muchly appreciated.. =]
thank you to the people who took the time out to call or send messages, thanks for remembering.. it means alot =]
haha and some amendments to my earlier blog entries:
...thank you to krystle for her generousity.. everyone owes her a thank you for the food keke
...to jaclyn for the surprise extra dvd! hehe >=D
...to jimmy for the the zhang zhi cheng albums i've been hunting high and low for, for aaaaages =D
...to conway for re-doing that lovely card
...to ngoc-iE for my newest wall decoration
...and thank you to tim for also buying me the ipod, the memory card, the RX-7, the photos, the spring rolls, the shoes, the flower clip, and everything else that i.. *cough* sounded like i acquired on my own, but really was his doing =P
many thanks and much love to all. ^__^

Momentary lapse...
~~>Friday 16.12.05<~~
A hundred days have made me older,
Since the last time that I saw your face;
A thousand lies have made me colder,
And I don't think I can look at this the same.
But all the miles that separate
Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you...
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you...
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you...
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight, it's only you and me...

lyrics of the moment... *sigh*

Hmm... -__-
~~>Wednesday 14.12.05<~~
argh.. it seems summer has well and truly set in.. the heat is cooking me alive, and certainly not in a good way. it's almost as though the weather has decided to humour us all and cook us sloooowly and painfully, so as to obtain optimum tenderness, while the slowness of it all will ensure we retain all our precious juices. yum yum, cooked to perfection -__-
i guess the good thing about melb is their cooler weather. while i was down there, it mostly averaged about 23 degrees i think? at night i was sleeping with a tracksuit jacket over my layers of pyjamas.. that's how unsummer-like it was =P ah yes.. good old cold melbourne temperatures. the other good thing about melbourne, or rather, springvale, is their vietnamese prawn and pork rolls [these constitute my favourite part of viet cuisine hehe] - basically vermicelli, lettuce, some herbs, and thinly sliced pork and prawns wrapped up with rice paper.. mmm.. *drool* =D and since in springvale practically everyone is viet, springvale central is full of viet food places which do the spring rolls really cheap. and for some reason, the rolls in springvale are oily.. [the rolls in brisbane are never oily?? o_O] i think perhaps they douse the rice paper in oil to stop the rolls from sticking to each other in the container, and it stops them from going all hard when they're refridgerated? O_O lol and i kid you not, after you've finished eating, you can literally grease a bunch of baking trays with all the oily residue left on your fingers =P mmmm.. gotta love that grease ^__~
haha anyways.. yesterday i received an email from conway with a lovely little 'electronic birthday card', if you wanna call it that. it features a cute little still shot of shigure sohma prancing in mid-air.. we all know how much i like shigure! =D i really liked it.. cuz it reflects on two things in life that i like very, very much - jap [which brings back many, many fond memories of jap class], and fruits basket keke. i was like "aw.. how sweet! except that my birthday is the 17th, not the 14th.." kekeke.. oh man, i crack me up =P so yes. conway if you're reading this, thanks again! ^__~
on another note, and this is rather degrading, i've finally figured out how to work my ipod. ahhahahaha yes. it only took me about an hour to figure out how to transfer music onto the damn thing -__- they say the ipod is built to be especially simple to work, and hell.. maybe it's a little TOO simple. -__-" *cough*
hmm.. well i thought i could stomach the heat for a little longer, but it seems my computer room has been converted into a walk-in oven that could almost rival conway's walk-in pizzeria room =P so with that, i must bid thee goodbye and escape to a room with somewhat cooler temperature.
fair thee well sons! =P

The Splurge-a-holic has returned!!
~~>Sunday 11.12.05<~~
BIG NEWS!! w0000t!! uncle yenny is back from a short trip to melboooournia.. that's right.. i'm back, and doling out more random crap to soil your eyes.. woohoo =P
hmm.. so it's only been 5 days without my precious, preeecious k-pop, but already i'm a filthy, filthy mess and suffering from extreme withdrawal symptoms. eeeekkk.. someone fill my ears with k-pop quickly before i implode!!! keke =P
well.. i had a whale of a time in melb! lol i'll leave that up to the viewer to interpret whether that's a postive or negative thing.. come on, use your imagination peoples, it's not THAT hard =P or has tv made you all braindead?? o_O keke
sara's wedding... was an interesting event. =P i guess since i'm not viet, i've yet to become accustomed to their traditions and whatnot, and being surrounded by people yelling out things in vietnamese and not understanding a word of it.. but all up it was pretty enjoyable. hell, what can i say.. i'm a girl.. i like getting dressed up =P
so anyway.. like i said before.. BIG NEWS!! keke >=) *licks lips in anticipation*
i totally busted my budget down in melb [and this extra expenditure can't possibly be good for the Bank of Uncle Yenny economy], but after much gruelling debating and soul-searching, uncle yenny is now the proud new owner of a beeeautiful yellow RX-7 [if i do say so myself =P] ask me nicely, and i just might consider letting you touch the leather interior someday ^__~
aha did i scare you there? i AM the proud new owner of an RX-7, but i won't be giving anyone any lifts anytime soon.. why? because it's a model car! *drool* it's a 1:24 diecast model of keisuke's yellow RX-7 from initial D, which i have searched for high and low around brisbane.. hehehehe okay okay.. so that was a rather corny joke.. but i felt like being tacky. being the king of spontaneity requires me to constantly say and do tacky and pointless things. *nods* =D and it DID take me a long time to decide.. i stood in the toy store hugging the boxes for ages before i finally decided which one i wanted [it was a toss-up between keisuke's FD and ryosuke's FC.. both models are soooo good *drooool*]
lol okay so all tackiness aside, now i can finally cross some things off that wishlist i created a few blog entries back. the day before i left for melb, i went out and splurged a hundred and twenty big ones on that wet2straight remington hair straightener O_O so there you go.. uncle yenny IS making her dreams come true =P so that's the first item off the list.. *CHECK* =P
and now here comes the fun part.. to the following people, i owe much gratitude.. jaclyn, who let slip what my birthday present is.. thank you heaps for the lost in translation dvd! early surprise deserves an early thank you keke =P
and for my new mp3 player, i owe much, much gratitude to tim.. thanks hunni.. in future, i will attempt to devote my energy to less threatening and slapping, and more lychee peeling =D
ah.. i never thought i'd say this, but i'm somewhat looking forward to work tomorrow. it's an 8am start, which isn't guna be pretty.. but i think i've finally grown used to it all, and as much as i love spontaneity, i like my routines as well. *sigh*.. well.. i guess i'd better get to sleep early. still sorta suffering "jet lag" [or whatever lag you wanna call it] from jetting in and out of daylight savings zones, and staying up too late because the sun only sets at 9.30pm down there. craaaazy shiznit =P
mmmm... sleeeeeeep... *drool* =F

Fuckedy fuck fuck!!
~~>Sunday 04.12.05<~~
how amusing for the onlooker.. gather round and watch as uncle yenny's mood swings from uppity-up-up to down-fuckedy-down... -__-"
i guess i shouldn't bitch so much, and any optimist in my place would be saying "you should be GRATEFUL for the marks you did get!"
well to hell with that, because i'm not a freaking optimist. just got my marks back for this semester, and jan is NOT happy.
i guess in most cases it's noone's fault but my own.. note that i say MOST there. i'm not even going to bother trying to disguise my frustration and utter contempt for groupwork anymore. and i think it goes without saying that most people know how i feel about that particular issue -__-.
but here's the real bitch. for japanese, which was the one freaking subject i was doing half decently in, i missed a 7 by 2%. 2 freaking, fricking, fucking percent. a couple more characters right on my kanji and katakana tests and i would've been set. my GOD i am hideously, hideously pissed off! i guess i miscalculated my marks for jap earlier in the sem, when i was speculating what overall mark i'd end up with. as in grossly miscalculated. turns out that 7 could've been attainable afterall. it shits me off because after all that, i still fell short by 2%. my one chance to raise my GPA to a half-decent level and i couldn't even pull it off. because in the long run, it seems it doesn't matter what percentage you score, but rather just the level of achievement you attain. in other words someone gaining a 5 at 65% and a 6 at 75% would get the same GPA of 5.5 as a person who scored 5 at 74% and a 6 at 84%[oh what a bitch that would be to fall short of a 7 by 1%!]. so ultimately it doesn't matter how high my 6 for jap is, it's still just a 6. that extra 8% doesn't count for shit all, and i might as well have focused it on other areas, such as trying to raise my lousy services marketing marks [incidentally, 8% more in services marketing would've landed me a nice fat distinction. how ironic -__-]. it also shits me off that by any other standards i would've achieved a 7, because usually the cut-off for a 7 is 85%, and in some cases like down in monash, 80%. but nooo. for languages, the cutoffs just HAVE to 5% higher than any other faculty don't they?! gaaargh faaaark!! i know, i know.. i should stop bitching and just get over myself. it really is noone else's fault but my own. but still.. i am just so, so, so disappointed in myself right now. severely disappointed. in total, i've managed to raise my GPA this sem by a WHOLE 0.083. whoop-dee-fucking-doo.
i think it's guna take quadruple-strength overdoses of k-pop to restore my mood to a relatively healthy level again. -__-
*sigh*
later days sons.

Banzai!! Another rant dedicated to k-pop! =P
~~>Saturday 03.12.05<~~ *happy birthday to... sonny! w00t*
haha it seems like it's been EVEYRONE's birthday lately huh.. birthdays, birthdays, birthdays, left right and centre... *cough cough* hehehe =P
so anyway.... w00t!! haha =P uncle yenny has stumbled upon a goldmine, if you want to call it that, of precious, precious k-pop.. like water flowing from the fountain of life into an open field of light, so flows k-pop from the internet into my computer... and i am going inSANE! extreme pleasure overload!! eeeeeeeekk >___<
haha so anyway.. i'm guna spend the next few paragraphs gushing and raving about various things related to k-pop, so if you're not interested at all then please skip ahead to the next entry, or perhaps just avert your eyes altogether =P
i'm ecstatic about the whole thing really because i've finally, finally gotten my grubby hands on some H.O.T stuff.. [H.O.T = korean boy band] i know, i know.. there're probably people out there shaking their heads and going "tsk tsk.. what IS she on?! H.O.T is soooo 1990's, and she's living in the past like some kind of.. past.. live-r.. in-ner.." *cough* =P but seriously.. since the group disintegrated ages ago, it's damn hard to find anything H.O.T-related, and hence i hadn't as yet experienced any of their music apart from listening to a few tacky midi sequences. and curiousity was really eating at me - i really wanted to know what the big deal about them was, and why everyone raved about them so much.. well, sons.. today i finally, finally, finally managed to snag a couple of their music videos and the three little words i have to say are: Worth The Wait. because the photos you see of them now totally don't do them justice.
*nods wisely* haha =P
after watching 'we are the future' i've gotta say.. i thoroughly loved the video clip. [especially the close-ups of kangta. my GOD! i don't think i've ever drooled so much in my life =P] even though i don't understand korean, and i didn't enjoy the actual music all that much, i loved the clip. and now i know why there was so much controversy around the whole thing.. insaaaane!
also watched 'haengbok [full of happiness]', which was just so ridiculous.. it really made me grin. i mean there's nothing really spectacular about outdated k-pop music =P but watching 5 dudes prance around in black and white striped clothing so baggy it could have doubled as bedsheets really awakens the silly, happy-go-lucky part of you that lies dormant most days of the year. and watching them do the can-can on tennis court bleachers really does wonders for your abs [i find that when you laugh extremely hard, it's like giving your stomach a workout =P work those muscles, tubby! keke]. and if THAT hasn't enticed you yet, then surely the sight of kangta getting hit in the head with a tennis ball while attempting to jig will do the trick! hahahaha.. don't get me wrong, uncle yenny loves kangta =P but it's such a happy little video clip that you'll find yourself laughing at just about anything that happens.
so... my verdict? a little k-pop will cure whatever ails ya. let the k-pop strip away all your blues, let it wash your worries away, let the boppiness take over.. k-pop all the way!! w00t! ^__~

It's all in the bag...
~~>Friday 02.12.05<~~ *birthday wishes to bevan =]*
wow.. it's already december the second.. that's insaaaane! =P so.. that means i've been on holidays for almost exactly a month now, although it feels like only a week or two.. wow.. where does the time go...? *sigh*
hmm.. between the time spent half-assing around among the sandwich grills and vacuum cleaners at myer, and the time spent chugging down pearl tea and kfc chips in the car, and the countless hours spent on the computer just "bumming", i don't think i've done anything productive at all. aish.. definitely not something to be proud of.. =S
hmmmm.. that said, it's time to take charge! uncle yenny has now formulated a plan.. yes.. a plan.. hmmmm.. yes. yes.
so here goes.. by the end of the holidays, i will:

*be proficient with japanese.. or at least to HHB082 level anyway =P [yes, yes i stole their unit outline off uni's OLT site =P and i know i said this last year, but this time i will actually proceed with a rigid self-taught japanese program =P]

*have figured out how to enrol myself and gary into UQ

*have acquired the complete collection of fushigi yuugi.. all 52 episodes and OVAs.. even if it takes me 30 bajillion hours straight of downloading!! T__T *cries*

*have finally read all of the books that jaclyn son lent to me aaages ago

*have created and stuck to a decent budget, i.e. saved my money and not blown on it all on wine gums and pretzels =P

*have saved up enough money to finally buy
... a decent sized mp3 player that won't screw up 2 weeks after the warranty expires -__-
... enough blanks to replenish my exhausted CD and DVD reserves
... all my textbooks for uni next sem aaaaiiiks... T__T
... that ionic wet2straight i've been ogling at work, instead of being productive keke
... that funky lil ice cream maker.. because everybody needs an ice cream maker!! hahaha
... 'lost in translation'
... a memory card for my baaaaby camera
... round trip tickets to malaysia.. [w00t! conterfeit merchandise, authentic char kway teow and ultimate wastage of money, here i come!! .__.]
... my way into UQ as an external student.. kakaka
... the definitive l'arc en ciel collection.. my GOD i love hyde's voice!! =F
... the ever illusive zhang zhi cheng's albums
... kangta, kangta, and MORE kangta memorabilia! remember children.. anything kangta must be good! heehee ^__~
... an endless supply of batteries, pearl tea, hard jubes, and kfc chips
... the shinhwa MAGIC cup!! w00t!! ehhhehehe *drool* *drooool*
... and.. since i'm in the spirit of being totally unrealistic, that rx-7 i've always wanted.. =P

haha yes. so there you have it sons. uncle yenny has formulated a plan for herself.
be sure to check back here in a couple of months to see if it all went to plan.. or.. rather.. went down the plughole. [the latter seems more feasible at the moment -__-"]
hmm... with that, i shall bid thee farewell.. it's time to embark on my routine downloading spree!
goodnight sons! =D

Upwards from here...
~~>Tuesday 29.11.05<~~ *happy birthday to anjum^^*
w00t! finally, for the first time, uncle yenny reached her sales target of $2000 yesterday at work! w00t!! of course, it only took her about ten freaking hours to do it -__- yes, that's right. i did a ten hour shift yesterday.. people, people, lavish your pity on me one at a time please, one at a time.. all donations in the box.. keke jk jk =P by the end of it all my legs felt ready to drop off, and my right arm was throwing tantrums and malfunctioning from being swung into a table while walking [long story, don't ask.. -__-" just know that plasma screen TVs are a dangerous distraction, and should come with a label saying "WARNING: wall-to-wall orgasmic plasma screen TVs may prove health hazards to pedestrians within viewing distance."].. but hey.. it's all good! .__.
i guess yesterday wasn't so bad. i think i finally broke the ice with this chick, rebecca, whom i'd previously thought was a snobby, uptight biatch, but she turned out to be alright i guess. or maybe she was just being nice out of boredom and lack of things to do [i mean, our department is just SO busy and all -__- *cough*].. ah there goes my cynicism again.
also ran into david in the locker room [that dude from training and orientation who was supposed to be working next to my area], and was sorry to learn he'd been moved down to level 3 instead. same with simon actually [ashton kutcher lookalike]. we found out on our first day that he'd been moved from level 4 down to men's suits on level 2. so now i don't have anyone to harrass =( argh.. uncle yenny is doomed to a working lifetime of solitude and non-harrassment! T__T
hmm.. so anyway.. back to gloating about the reaching of a certain target sales figure.. bahahaha =P yesterday i discovered that scott, one of the nicer people in my department, had only reached his 2 grand target the other day because he'd sold a $1000 coffee machine in his first hour -__- i mean really now.. sell one of those babies and you're pretty much set for life. *drool* so.. my point being? i guess it's comforting to learn that people don't really reach the target because they're super suave, smooth-talking sell-a-holics. it's more a matter of getting lucky and being in the right place [i.e. at the register] at the right time [i.e. when the customer approaches the register]. so there you have it. the secrets of so-called "persuasive" selling revealed. not so savvy afterall huh? =P
hmm.. seeing as i'm in a relatively good mood now i think i might try to enhance my endorphin levels a little further. nothing acts as a steroid for endorphins quite like a spree of illegitimate file-sharing, accompanied by a long, therapeutic session of CD burning. actually my music sources have run rather dry of late, after yeejiun pretty much wiped out my CD collection that day we went driving. he stripped it bare to all but my k-pop CDs.. mmmmm.. preeecious k-pop..... *drool*... hmm.. i hope he actually listens to all those CDs and doesn't just chuck them in the corner of his room or turn them into makeshift frisbees for his dog. i don't care how cute hunter is [and granted, he is pretty damn cute. he's like the daschund version of the wiggly dog, whom i adore oh soooo much! *sigh* wiggly dog.. *sigh* =P], no dog will make a mockery of my preeecious ajikan albums and get away with it!! T__T ohhh can you FEEL the patriotism?? haha =P
hmm.. yes.. well.. i believe that's what i shall do. yes. so if you'll excuse me, uncle yenny will now depart to embark upon a music replenishment mission =D
later days sons!

Asians make the worst drivers
~~>Friday 25.11.05<~~
well.. i wasn't guna blog about this, but after witnessing a spate of bad asian driving, i thought i might as well.. perhaps this will provide amusement for someone else out there =P
Case 1: last sunday jimmy had his post-birthday gathering at this japanese restaurant in sunnybank. after dinner jimmy and his friends went off to karaoke and pool, but since jaclyn and i weren't too keen on it we sat in the carpark trying to figure out what we were guna do. as we were sitting there this blue rx-7 cruised by [most people who know me know that the rx-7 is one of my dream cars.. ohhh yeeearh.. *drool* *drool*]. anyway.. the driver of the rx-7 [some asian dude, of course] was attempting to park in the spot right outside of the restaurant we'd just come out of [and incidentally, it was a disabled parking spot.. tsk tsk, asians these days.. -__-]. after like four attempts he finally managed to get his car into the parking spot, but i guess he wanted to straighten up some more or something. he started to reverse out again at an alarming speed, only to reverse right into the black skyline parked behind him. .__. the impact actually pushed the skyline back about a meter or so, which was kind of shocking. the driver and his passenger jumped out to inspect the damage on both cars. finally, after going back and forth between the two cars, they pushed the skyline back into its original position and drove off. [*ah.. note that while the whole incident sounds rather horrible, when jaclyn and i went past the skyline later we couldn't actually see any damage on it.. so fear not, sons! some innocent person out there didn't come back to find their car totally trashed... ^^]
-__-
Case 2: yesterday evening jaclyn and i were again killing time in the car. we saw this lovely gray 200sx coming towards us, and the driver [again, some asian dude who looked like he couldn't see over the wheel] attempted a reverse park into the spot next to us. after going back and forth a few times, he finally got it right and began to reverse straight into the space. i remember watching him in amusement, then realising when he wasn't slowing down that he was going to back straight into the car parked behind him. of course my screaming "don't! don't! you're guna hit!" didn't actually achieve anything, and the only thing we could do was look on as he reversed right into it. needless to say, he sped straight off after that.
hah. so there you have it.. undeniable proof that asians really are bad drivers. LOL -__-
oooh anyways.. moving right along.. guess what i stumbled across today, sons! muahahaha that's right.. some really oldschool sticker photos from baaack in the days when sticker photos were THE thing =P i'll be posting them up, just for old time's sake.. so keep your eyes on the album! >=D
later days ^__~

How do I say... Part II
~~>Saturday 19.11.05<~~
hmm.. i'm sitting at home at a loss for what to do.. don't know what to think or say or do..
met up with yeejiun at sunnybank a little earlier.. around 6pm. just to say final goodbyes and whatnot, since his plane leaves in a couple of hours. and now i guess i finally know the answer to all those questions from one of my earlier posts..
well.. the answer is.. i guess you just do it. i said one final goodbye, gave him a hug, then started to walk away. though i tried my hardest not to look back, i couldn't stop myself. sad, really. but with a final wave, i continued to walk away.
after that i spied an empty bench near the taxi rank so i sat down. didn't feel like going home just yet, and it still felt "early" because the sun hadn't set yet. and so i just sat there for a while, pulling a "sheannal", just sitting there watching the world go by, people walking past, everything moving along.. just for the sheer sake of it. and it was kinda nice.. peaceful.. calming.. since i didn't know what else to do and i couldn't bring myself to go home. i actually thought i was doing quite well, until suddenly i noticed romeo walking towards me saying, "hey stranger! why so glum?" and that's when the tears finally came.
stupid, really. i cry over everything.. i guess it's because i'm so girly and emotionally weak. after sitting with romeo for a while, i made my way back to the car where i sat for a little longer. and finally, as an attempt to distract my mind, i called krystle out to see if she wanted to go for some homemade prozac.. [heh.. meaning ice cream].. so later, bubby and i sat in the car eating korean ice creams.. *sigh* i'm lucky to have friends like that. i think all up, i'm extremely lucky to have experienced all the things that i have.. if anything, it makes you wiser.. a little stronger.. a little more mature.. if anything, it teaches you that no matter how bad things may seem, no matter how sad you are, the experiences and memories you gather are something you should one day be able to look back upon and smile about.
i think yeejiun made a bigger impression on me than i realised. even though he really tried my patience sometimes, now i know his intentions were good. underneath it all he's a nice person. it's sad that you don't realise things until it's too late isn't it? i've learned so much from all the things we talked about, the things we did, the times we hung out.. definitely something to look back and smile about...
wasureinai de... =]

Just another downswing...
~~>Friday 18.11.05<~~
working at myer sucks. wait, maybe that statement isn't entirely true. let me try again. working in the appliances and luggage departments at myer SUCKS. yeah.. that's better. because i'm sure in other departments it's alot more busy and much more fun. trust my luck to get lumped in a lousy corner section -__-
soo.. it was my first day today. i didn't make a single mistake on the register...... because i didn't have any fricking customers to serve!!! *extremely angry face* okay, that's a lie as well. i did serve some people. guess how many....
in the time i was there, from 10am to 3pm, i served seven people. seven WHOLE people. [wh00p-dee-freaking-doo. someone call security, this department is really going OFF! -__-] the rest of the time [and this means MOST of the time] i just stood around idly, while my head spun from trying to remember all the differences between the ridiculous number of juicers, toasters, water jugs, coffee machines and whatnot.
it was tiring standing up all day, and the fact that i had nothing to keep me occupied only made the fatigue and pain worse. obviously if you're kept busy all day tending to customers and interacting with people, you'll be distracted from thinking about how hideously bored and tired you are.
that, and the people aren't all that nice.
after just an hour into my shift i wanted to go home and never come back. *sigh* and the highlight of my shift was being sent down to level Q on an errand to return some slinky black lingerie that someone had conveniently dumped on our counter -__- how sad is that. you just KNOW something isn't right when the best part of your day is getting away from the place you're supposed to be based in. i sincerely hope i spend most of my time being shifted around to different departments to fill in shifts for people, because i don't think i can stomach much more of my home department.
well.. moving along..
for the next couple of days, i think uncle yenny will find herself plunging into a rapid, spiralling downswing. i can sense it now.. don't ask how i know, i just do. i'm guna be feeling absolutely anti-social. so it's probably best i find myself a hole to bury myself in for the while that i won't be fit for human company.
goodbye sons.

Right back to square one..
~~>Thursday 17.11.05<~~
uncle yenny has managed to keep herself busy for the last few days, which is a good thing. if there's one thing she's learned recently, it's that if there's something to keep her occupied, her mind will be distracted from thinking too much. and when she doesn't have too much time to think too hard, the depression won't kick in.
hah. okay, out of that weird third person writing and back into first person.. the last few days have kinda just flown by in a blur. it doesn't feel like three days since i last blogged, it feels like an eternity.
had training on tuesday for my new job, which i will be starting tomorrow.. eeek.. i'm so nervous! to be honest, all the stuff i learned on tuesday has kind of just flown out of my head and i just know i'm going to make some horrendous mistake tomorrow and it'll all be over for me even before the end of my first shift. *sigh* on the bright side, training was really quite fun. our facilitator, belinda, was a really good speaker. she told us lots of interesting little stories and she has an excellent way with words. hehe her sarcasm and dry humour kind of reminds me of mine, so i liked her =D although by the end of it all, everyone was kind of like "shut UP already, i wanna go home!" most of the people at training were nice too. the first person i met was this dude simon, cuz we were both wandering around looking for the staff entry. since being bold and talking to strangers has actually turned out quite well the last few times i've done it, i decided to indulge in it again and approach him. haha it's the strangest thing, but he's like an exact replica of ashton kutcher in his roles in "dude, where's my car?" and "that 70's show". it's hilarious. he has the same kind of hair, same colour, similar face, he talks like him, and he has this fascination with collecting vinyl records from the 70s. the resemeblance is uncanny!
oh and it was comforting to finally meet someone who'd be working in the same department as myself. his name is chris, and he kinda reminds me of ben skeggs, which freaks me out a little but i guess i'll cope. any company is better than none. still, that being said, i think i'll be doing an awful lot of wandering over to the electrical section where i can drool over the giant orgasmic plasma screen TVs all day *drool* ohhh yeeeaaarh.. that's probably the best advantage of working in such a boring department.. it's right next to all the electronics and entertainment heehee. chris was like "i dunno, i think our department will be pretty fun =D". pfft. right. how much fun can you have with the fricking toasters and water jugs? -__-
i've sort of made friends with a guy who'll be working in the entertainment section, his name is david. he was actually in the same group interview as myself, i remember sitting down next to him. then after we got the job, we wound up in the same pre-employment orientation group, and in the same group again for training. haha what are the odds! i'll be harrassing him alot, hehe bet he'll regret being nice to me now >=P
hmm.. went driving last night with yeejiun. [i'm over the whole bohemian spelling/interpretation thing, so i might actually start spelling his name properly now -__-] since he's flying home the day after tomorrow, i asked him if there was anywhere he hadn't been that he'd like to go before he left. and of all the places, he responded with mt cootha. since i don't actually know the way to mt cootha, and my map reading skills are pretty much non-existent, i figured the next bext alternative was the mt gravatt lookout. and so we grabbed pizza and stuff and drove to the lookout. it was really nice. made it just in time to watch the last slivers of daylight disappearing from the sky, and all the lights across the city were glittering away. it would've been better if there weren't so many damn trees blocking the view, but still. it was nice to just sit in the car eating and talking.
after the lookout we were at a loss for things to do, so we drove around randomly to the city and valley and ended up getting lost because of my inability to take the right turn-offs at the right places. o_O honestly i could've sworn i was boring him to tears and finally, when we made it back to sunnybank, i asked at random, "do you like looking at houses?" i was extremely surprised when he said that he did. [what do you know.. we have something in common after all. w00t! =P] so with that, we headed to the avenue to admire the lovely houses they have there, and then to stretton to drool enviously over the enormous mansions. there were some veeeery nice ones there actually. we kind of just circled the area feeling incredibly inferior because all the mansions were so exquisite to look at. even the palm trees out front screamed, "drool over me! i'm oh-so-expensive and ever-so-desirable!!"
actually i'm still surprised at how yeejiun and i get along, especially when we talk, depite his fobbiness. don't get me wrong, his english is amazingly good! but still.. ordinarily i wouldn't have let myself get so close to those kinda asians, mostly because i don't get along with them. i guess i'm surprised at myself. and despite all the things i've bagged him out for in the past, i know i'll miss him and his "friendship" after he's left.. *sigh* =(
umm.. what else.. jaclyn had her last exam today! w00t!! so she's now officially on holidays haha.. as i have been for the past 2 weeks >=P to celebrate the end of her torture we were supposed to go have a lunch feast, so i picked her up from uni and we wound up at fasta pasta in browns plains. i finally got to try the gnocchi pasta i've been wanting to try for ages.. and it's not so bad, contrary to what monkey son denise claimed in the past. still.. i think their ravioli is the best.. *drool* oh i wish i could have some right now!! T__T
ahh.. i'm so hungry.. and starting to feel that familiar niggling, glum feeling starting to set in. -__- i think i might go indulge in some comfort food and then begin studying what little information they gave us on tuesday that will minimise my risk of being fired. w00t.. ja.. ittekimasu.. =(

Uncle Yenny is back in the.. "zone"..
~~>Monday 14.11.05<~~
hmm.. well what do you know.. i guess nice things CAN happen on a monday afterall.. o_O
today wasn't such a bad day.. i think i'm finally starting to snap out of my gloom-doom outlook and back to somewhat positive reality.
today started off kinda.. mehh.. heh. [yes. "meh" will be used in this context as an adjective =P] i wanted to take the bus from sunnybank so i could tranfer and catch the bus to brookside from the city. saw bevan at the bus stop, which was nice. [although now i'm kinda worried for him - i will explain in good time, my sons..] when i got there, i realised i didn't have a valid bus card, so i left bevan and hurried into the shopping centre to buy one. by the time i came back out of course all the buses had left, so the only thing to do was wait for the next one. and wait i sure did. in fact, i waited for nearly an hour. of course during this time a good 4 or 5 buses should have gone past and the number of people waiting had rapidly increased, so that there was a large crowd milling around the stop going "what the fuuuuck, where's the fucking bus?!"
well.. turns out all public transport had been frozen because someone had called emergency services and made bomb threats - 4 bombs would "explode", and one would supposedly go off at 5pm. hmm well.. i'm sure everyone will see or hear about this on the news sooner or later anyway. i think it might've been a hoax, but who knows. honestly. if it WAS a hoax [and let's hope for everyone's sake that it was], it kinda makes you wonder why people don't have anything better to fricking do with the time on their hands?? -__-
oh yeah. i was worried for bevan because he was on his way to uni to do an oral assessment, and since he left on one of the buses just after i'd left the stop, i doubt he would've made it into the city before they froze the system [around midday]. pretty much the bus drivers and train stations were forcing passengers to evacuate and stand back at least 100 meters away. so yeah. i hope he made it okay.. and that he didn't get marked down for something that wasn't his fault.
well.. finally made it to brookside after a long delay. it was actually alot nicer than i'd thought! lol guess you shouldn't judge a book by its cover. the other day when krystle and i drove there, we didn't actually go inside but rather just made snide comments about the building's exterior. today i actually ventured inside, and i was pleasantly surprised ^__^ it's sort of like halfway between sunnybank and garden city in terms of size. but the people at brookside seem alot nicer haha. in every shop that i entered, the service people were really, really nice and helpful o_o oh, and i saw becky from jap class =D hehe that was nice too. i was really surprised that she even knew my name LOL. since it was my first time inside the shopping centre, i was wandering around, phasing out and gaping at everything like a tourist. suddenly i heard someone calling my name, and hey presto - it was becky hehe. how nice of her to say hello.. *sigh* =] turns out she lives about ten minutes away from brookside or something. pretty convenient.
hmm.. there's still helicopters circling around right now.. must be keeping an eye on the transport situation i guess.
hmmm.. i think i might go watch the dvds i hired out today. hah yes, i finally, finally brought sufficient ID to blockbuster, and then proceeded to rent out 'volcano high', and also this other movie called 'tokyo godfathers'. hope they're good ^__~

How do I say...
~~>Sunday 13.11.05<~~
ever had one of those days where everything started off remotely well, then at the end it suddenly just went downhill without any reason in particular, and every endorphin produced in your body just kind of imploded on itself, leaving you feeling like absolute shit?
i know my last flew blogs have been nothing but depressing, and have been spent whinging and whining about something.. i don't know what it is, but i wish i could kick the feeling. i fucking hate this.
today started off well enough - went to all-you-can-eat sushi with jaclyn and jimmeh at westend. i absolutely stuffed myself, and at the end of the day we all just went back to jaclyn's place and sat around talking. and it was nice.. =]
but then by the time i got home, i had this overwhelming urge to cry. it's a feeling i can't seem to shake. and i feel like not even all the kimchi and junk food in the world would raise my sunken spirits.
was supposed to dye yejiun's hair tomorrow [we're on civilised terms again -__-] , but at the last minute he bailed out. even more contribution to my glum-ness. i was actually looking forward to it, not because i wanted to wreak revenge on him by ruining his hair [*semi joking there* =P], but because it would've been half fun. i like dying other peoples' hair. i remember doing jaclyn's hair a while ago, and once before with denise as well. 'twas much funneth =]
i also feel glum because i know that would've been the last time i saw him before he left, since he's leaving in five days. kinda sad, really. i guess i've grown to appreciate his friendship a little more than i would've liked to admit in the past. all the nice things he says in his messages and when we talk might actually be enough to overthrow his jekyll-hyde personality hah. it's not so much because we were bum-buddies or anything like that. hell, far from it. but it's more the sentimental aspect of it.. how do you say goodbye to someone that you know you're never going to see again? how do you tell them to take care.. look after themselves.. keep in touch.. acting like somehow in the future you'll meet them again, but all the while you know full well that it's not going to happen? i know it sounds like an over-dramatisation, which i am oh-so-good at. but it's not.. it's just the way it is. i guess now i can sort of appreciate how sheannal felt about rachel leaving. not as extreme of course, because our situations are different.. but it's there. it's painful.
in all honesty, it makes me feel like crying. i guess my sentimental alter-ego is taking over again. i know i felt like this last year after management, and it was san's last semester. i felt sad about him leaving, although maybe not as much as in this case because we weren't really friends outside of uni. but still.. it's the sentiment that makes you feel lousy. i know i'll get over it. everything will keep on moving, because life goes on regardless of whether you're ready to move on from something. and sooner or later we'll each be nothing but a distant memory, if a memory at all, in the other person's mind.. but it's just sad thinking about it. especially in my current state. everything just seems depressing these days.. -__-
tomorrow i'm guna take a nice long bus ride to somewhere. and it'll be just me and my trusty MD. a nice long bus ride with a nice long continuous flow of music.. mm.. sounds good.
hmm.. that comedy festival showdown thingy is on tv tonight.. what lucky timing. maybe that'll pull my mood up a bit. got all my junky food and whatnot on standby as well.. heh.
yeah. well. later days sons.

Sea of Love...
~~>Saturday 12.11.05<~~
i'm so in love... kekeke =P
i'm so in love with Fushigi Yuugi
i'm in love with the magic between Miaka and Tamahome
i'm in love with Seki Tomokazu's seiyuu abilities
i'm in love with Takehito Koyasu's enchanting voice
i'm in love with KangTa's charisma
i'm in love with the sound of Zhang Zhi Cheng singing
i'm in love with 'Sea of Love' by FTTS ^__~
i'm in love with the idea of fantasy
i'm in love with music by L'Arc~En~Ciel
i'm loving the idea of sleeping all day long
i love when music makes me feel better
and i love the thought that everything will be alright in the end... =]

Waking up to myself...
~~>Friday 11.11.05<~~ *it's Rememberance Day* =]
for the first time in over a week i actually stayed at home today.. i hadn't intended to, but woke up feeling rather shitfaced [not unusual considering the inexplicable lousiness i've been feeling for the last few days] and instead of getting up, i just rolled over and went right back to sleep.
i whiled away most of the day by sleeping to the sweet alternating sounds of kpop and zhang zhi cheng on my CD player. it was.. relaxing.. i guess. and i guess it was nice to be lazy.
now i've come to realise.. it seems that i let my happiness ride too much on other peoples' actions. and now that i've awakened to it, it's not something i would ever recommend to anyone. leaving your happiness in other peoples' hands only makes you vulnerable emotionally. and when your emotions become overbearingly strong, you suffer. mentally and physically.
of course, fixing this is so much, much, much more easier said than done. today i vowed to do something about it. i vowed that no matter how tight i had to clench my fists, or how hard i had to squeeze my eyes shut and grit my teeth, i would DO something about it. i would not leave myself open to disaster, susceptible to more wounds.
and then, it all fell apart. and i wound up right back where i'd started - nowhere. melting away because of someone else's actions.
i think it's time i just admitted how weak i truly am.
i am only human.

Time Slip
~~>Thursday 10.11.05<~~
from here on in, i'll let it go
everything i yearn, everything i know
it hurts to know i've been the fool
but it doesn't matter anymore
because it's not too late to change.
i can grow from this,
i know i can.
and someday when i've grown,
when i've come to my senses,
i'll look back on everything now...
and i know i'll smile,
because it happened.
i won't cry, nor will i feel sad,
there won't be any frown on my face
because everything will just be a fond memory...
a reminder of what little we shared,
and what lessons i learned.
the burning scars and bitter-sweet anguish will be gone,
replaced by a fond memory born.
there's still a long, long way to travel...
but somehow, someday
i know i'll get there in my own time...

It always takes its time to sink in, doesn't it...
~~>Friday 04.11.05<~~
okay.. i'll bet everyone here is sick of hearing about noisyfucker 2, and frankly i'm tired of writing about him. well no, that's a lie. i love to rant, i love to bitch, and this case is definitely no exception. but i've finally come to a nice, solid conclusion about him today: he's generation Y's equivalent of doctor jekyll and mr hyde.
okay, so i suppose that IS a bit harsh there. i DO tend to exagerrate with alot of things, don't i. -__-
this morning i was woken up by a nice, bubbly message on my phone from none other than noisyfucker 2 himself. i suppose Considerate Yejiun is back from the drycleaners again, or wherever it is that he wandered off to in that short period between yesterday morning and today.
i decided to finally confront him about his bizarre mood swings, but made sure to give him every opportunity to justify himself, i.e. i asked him "was something wrong yesterday at uni?" [i AM proud of myself, perhaps my temper really is becoming controllable now? o_o]
to which he replied no.
i also stressed that if i did something to offend him, he should just tell me.
again, the answer was no.
and so i promptly proceeded to air my frustrations via sms.
if i hadn't previously offended him [since he claims that's the case], i'm sure i took care of that quite well this morning. i actually feel kind of bad. because now the onus is on me that we end contact on lousy terms.
hmm. okay. well. i think this is the last i'll post of this matter, because the whole thing is just growing quite tiresome. that, and while i'm still somewhat frustrated, i don't feel that ranting about it is going to solve anything. maybe if somewhere down the track i have something nice and positive to say about him, then i will. but for now, it's time to get noisyfucker 2 and all his inconsistent words and actions and mood swings out of my system.
so.. moving right along..
i guess it didn't really sink in yesterday because of the fatigue.. but semester 2 is finally, finally over for me. yes. the end of the academic year. another year come and gone.. isn't it amazing the way time flies? they say time flies when you're having fun. and i did have fun this sem. it was quite possibly the best semester i've had since i started uni, because this time i actually went out and made my own friends of my own accord. yeap. i'm definitely sorry to see this semester come to an end.
my very last exam of the year, jap, went alright. well.. i guess that's an understatement. actually, no. i'm hoping that it's an understatement.. because i would really, really, REALLY love a 6 for jap as a post-christmas present under my non-existant christmas tree [in this case, i suppose my computer table will suffice as a place to lay all tithes and offerings =P]. again, much like the business law exam, i was surprised to find the content somewhat easy.. okay.. i've probably just jinxed myself good there, but seriously.. obviously i know i made some mistakes, because some questions i just did NOT have any clue what the answer was, but overall the whole paper was alot more breezy than i'd expected it to be. i suppose it really DOES help when you scare yourself shitless into thinking that the exam will be uber hard. and on that note, kudos to my business law and ethics tutor for his overexagerrated sense of self importance and rigid scare tactics that frightened me into studying my ass off for the law exam, lest i fail miserably.
ummm... what else.. hmm...
today i went to carindale with bubby for a while. i was looking for some suitable clothes for work, and you wouldn't think it but it is so DAMN hard to find a nice plain white collared blouse and a black skirt. i'm sick of not being able to fit into clothing properly! i'm NOT anorexic, nor do i have any desire to fatten myself up. it's just so hard to find a nice fitting top that doesn't make me look like i'm wearing a sack.
hmm.. well that's my rather trivial gripe for today. oh yes, that and also: marketing subjects at QUT have TOO much groupwork involved in them!! gaaaaargh!! i'm in a bad mood now after this whole re-enrolment attempt. i think i might finally watch some naruto and fullmetal alchemist, which i've been meaning to catch up on for aaaaages.. yeah. that oughta improve my mood.
*sigh*
fare thee well, sons.

Things that make you go 'hmm'... Part II
~~>Thursday 03.11.05<~~ 2nd entry today
Things that make you go 'hmm'... well, here's one: noisyfucker 2. [at this point i should probably stop and give praise to conway for inventing that name, since i seem to use it so often. yes. kudos to conway ^^]
noisyfucker 2, aka yejiun... jeez... what the FUCK is wrong with this guy?? DAMN! i know i've made reference to his mood swings and split personalities before, but seriously.. i thought my mood swings were bad, but this guy seems to have enough different faces to rival the number of snakes on medusa's head. i think in his next life he should come back reincarnated as a yo-yo. it'd suit him MUCH better.
i mean just today.. in the morning he sent me another message, all bright and chirpy, then a couple of hours later at uni, he was all sour and wouldn't even look me in the eye. even tay was being more friendly! furthermore, he even proceeded to make more conversation with conway than he did with me. i'm aggravated about this not because i'm jealous [i mean hey, i don't think ANYTHING could come between the love yejiun and tay have for each other -__- *semi-sarcastic joke there*], but simply because as far as i know, he and conway aren't even friends. and later on, i saw him in the city being all friendly and chatty with a bunch of other people when ten minutes earlier he couldn't even offer so much as a "cya" to my face after the exam was over.
so what the fuck?!! did i do something wrong?? in the space of just a couple of hours, where the only contact i made with him was a reply to his msg, what did i do that made him turn into some kind of almighty oscar the grouch??
shit! it just gives me the irks because i never know what the fuck i did wrong. or could it be that he's just not worth being friends with? hmm i guess it shouldn't matter anyway, cuz this "friendship", if you can even call it that [jeez, why don't we ask HIM for his opinion on it, i'd seriously like to know exactly what the hell he really thinks of me], is due to expire soon since he's leaving in a couple of weeks.
i guess i'm the kind of person who likes to end things on a positive note. and i'm pretty sure today was the last time i'd be seeing him around since i don't have any more exams so i won't need to be at uni anymore. and fuck oath, didn't my contact with him today end on a sour note.
i know, i know.. i could sit here all night ranting on and on about how unjustified i find his actions to be.. thankfully i have a partner in crime who wants as badly as i do to see something lousy happen to noisyfucker 2.. [lol, yes, yes, it's conway. one of the good things in common we have is this mutual interest in showing up yejiun]. it may not be for the same reasons, i.e. my ultimate aim in all this is to see yejiun get served his just desserts, whereas conway really only wants something to point and laugh at, and get a kick out of =P but still. maybe, just MAYBE.. we'll actually go through with some of the schemes we discussed today.. muahahaha. oh man, i'm sad. -__- so much for the "i'm learning to control my temper" theory i blogged about earlier today.
*sigh* i think i've had enough of this shit for now.
using the words of the ever-respectable tino tonitini: "later days".

Things that make you go 'hmm'...
~~>Thursday 03.11.05<~~
ooookay so here's an up-to-the-moment report of the happenings in the life of Uncle Yenny. [not that anyone really CARES, i mean jeez.. how exagerrated must my sense of self-importance be?? -__-]
well.. i'm sitting in the GH link at uni ranting on here instead of studying for jap.. am i stupid? hmm. i'd say the answer is indefinitely yes.
anyways.. i actually just came from my business law and ethics exam.. started at 8.30 and it was supposed to go for 3 hours, but for some reason completely beyond my explanation i found the exam rather easy, and i even finished before halftime. i probably would've left the room earlier if not for that silly halftime rule. so, in accordance with the title of my blog, i can just imagine everyone reading this going "hmmm... she must've done exceedingly bad on the exam or something", and i'd probably be inclined to agree with you there.. *sigh* if something seems TOO easy, then there MUST be a catch, riiight?!
ah who cares i'm too happy to think about that now! although i think the tiredness may start to set in relatively soon. i've been up since 5 am and didn't get much good sleep last night. which means i'm guna turn into an absolute grouch in a couple of hours. at 12.30 in the morning i got woken up by a message from yejiun [whom i now owe one million coffees to, given that i pass the law exam due to his "good luck" wishes]. having being woken up, in my *cough* slightly grumpy state, i was extremely tempted to reply with "I.O.U: one kick in the groin" instead, but i know his intentions were good, so i refrained.
that said, i think i'm becoming rather adept at controlling my temper now! w000t! i think anyway -__-
yesterday, chan finally admitted to being a liar. that's right. all these months, everything he'd kept insisting on was nothing but a whopping big, blatant, fucking lie. and although i knew he was lying all along, it was still somewhat satisfying finally hearing him admit to the truth. of course after he admitted to it, i was tempted to let fly with all the obscenities and expletives flying around in my head at the time, but i REFRAINED. that's right! uncle yenny is finally learning.
hmm.. well now that i've gotten some things off my chest, i think i might begin cramming for jap. i'm still kind of buggered about the content of the exam. as conway pointed out last night, the revision sheet she gave us made no sense whatsoever, and so i have no idea what to expect for the real thing. alls i know is i can definitely kiss that 7 goodbye, unless i manage to score 100% on this exam. which i won't. the best i can hope for is a 6. *sigh* how disappointing. well.. guess i'd better get going. this extra time to study is a gift.. i really shouldn't waste it.
later days people!

My brain is a one-way street.
~~>Tuesday 01.11.05<~~
so here i am after that dreaded services marketing exam.. i can honestly say that while i probably won't pass with flying colours, i am extremely, EXTREMELY relieved that it's over. and now i can finally concentrate on cramming for business law and ethics, and japanese!
throughout the day, my mind was a complete and utter mess. information was going in one eye and out the other.. in fact, what meagre information i DID manage to absorb into my brain during my last minute cramming attempt flowed down a one-way channel that lead right back out of my head. hmm.. i think it might have something to do with the fact that cramming in a semester's worth of information for three different units and trying to retain it all in the space of one week is quite a difficult task.. in fact, it was like a warzone in my head, where business law and ethics teamed up with japanese to battle it out against services marketing for what precious little space i had left in my brain.
i can just imagine it now...
"make way, servicescape and demand capacity management!" cried the contra-proferentum rule, as he hid behind his armour of class 3 japanese verbs.
"never!!" shouted back semi-variable pricing, as he joined in firing round after round of communication gimmicks at his rivals, promissory estoppel and negligent misrepresentation....
kekeke okay, so maybe i'm letting my imagination run away a little there. but only because i'm in such a good mood that services marketing is over! ^__^ *big cheesy grin* i think the elation you feel after finally just getting an assessment over and done with is almost worth all the pain and stress and panic you go through beforehand.. =P
hmm.. that being said, i think there should be a law against letting neurotic students like myself sit for exams so late in the day [5.30pm services marketing exam.. what the HELL... >__>] because it really doesn't do anything for your mental health or wellbeing.
basically your day begins at the crack of dawn where you get up bright and early to do a spot of last-minute cramming, most of which is wasted anyway when you spend hours shaking and hyperventilating from all the nerves. then the sleepiness starts to set in from waking up so early, and so you figure a nice cup of coffee will cure what ails ya. but no. don't be fooled - it really doesn't. caffeine doesn't soothe ANYTHING, least of all your frazzled nerves. after overdosing on triple strength coffee shots, your concentration span sharply decreases, and all that's left for you to do is wait anxiously for the hours to pass by until you can finally get into the exam room to sit the paper and have it all over and done with.
see? nothing good comes of it at all.. -__-
ah anyways.. it's time for me to stop killing time in the library and head home. where the cramming for my last two exams will begin!! w00t!! let the cramming commence!! >__<

Move over, urge-to-splurge.. -__-
~~>Monday 31.10.05<~~
that's right.. move over urge-to-splurge, urge-to-blog is coming through!
this is really ridiculous.. in just 24 hours, i'll be sitting for my marketing exam.. for which i am ill-prepared [someone give me a medal, that must be the understatement of the century!] yet still am not panicking about, for some bizarre reason.
instead of revising and cramming in as much as i possibly can, i'm online blogging, with my music by l'arc~en~ciel on repeat at full blast. jeez.. of all the inappropriate times.. -__-"
well.. if it's any comfort, i guess at least i'm not the only one. [okay, here begins yet another rant dedicated to NoisyFucker 2, as conway refers to him. simply because the more i talk to him, the more i am amazed. this guy never fails to astound me].
last night, around midnight...
yejiun: my first exam is tomorrow
me: dude.. why are you on msn instead of studying?
yejiun: it's not going into my head
me: i see
yejiun: i've only studied about 5% of what i need to. and i'm still not panicking
me: -__- i'm proud of you, son.
[needless to say, he didn't understand my dry humour/sarcasm, and actually thought i was being serious about being proud of him]
so.. is it just me, or are international students just FREELOADERS?! daaamn.. i dunno how yejiun does it. it's like he's just blundering his way through his education, if you can even call it that. quoting robin klein in one of my favourite books: "i personally didn't believe that he ever went to school at all. i think he just groped his way out of a forest covered in bark and lichen like something out of a science fiction story..."
haha and you can just imagine it being the same in yejiun's case.. him just groping around blindly in the dark, hoping that one way or another he'll stumble out the right way into the light.
i remember running into him at uni sometimes, right before he had to get to a group meeting. jeez. i'd hate to have been in a group with him, must've been hell trying to get any groupwork pulled together. >__>
*cough* anyway moving right along...
i think i know what it is now.. blogging is like my last minute attempt to relieve all the pent-up stress that i've been secretly pooling for the last week or so. that, and i think i've become re-addicted to the net. of course, at the most inconvenient possible time. yes. i really DO need to get a hold of my urges. it's kinda like hormones. if i can control my freaking hormones, then why can't i control my freaking urges/cravings/addictions?! naaaaargghhh oookay now i'm just rambling pointlessly again.
i think it's a sign i should get back to work. -__-"
and with that, uncle yenny signs out! *flourish*

YES!! Another one bites the dust...
~~>Tuesday 25.10.05<~~ entry #2
YESSSSS!! take THAT, you stupid PR assignment!! i'm finally done with you, done-diddly-one-iddly-doodly-diddly-dodddly-diddly..daaargh... *sigh*
it's been several gruelling hours, but i think my PR assignment is finally done! w000t! =] of course there's still the finishing touches to be put on it, but i'll deal with those either tomorrow night, or thursday. best to let it sit for a while.. if there's one thing i've actually learned from PR [haha.. you didn't think that was possible, did you?! =P], it's that if you want to get the best results with your piece, you should write it up then let it sit for a few days before coming back to edit it. i can't remember the explanation why, but i do know that it works. =] *breathes sigh of relief*
so.. now that i'm back to my regular sleep-deprived, edgy, narky state, i've been thinking... [ooh, this is guna get ugly >__>]
today after jap i ended up wandering around with conway again for a bit [like i explained in my earlier entry, i hadn't intended to meet up with him since i'd been kinda shitted off at him over the weekend. but he was nice enough to msg me about what had been on the speaking test, since he'd done his an hour before mine.. and so i thought i should return the favour and give him a copy of the reading exercise i was getting off yejiun]. as we were idly wandering around, conway let slip what his first impression of me had been, i.e. what he had thought of me the very first time he saw me.
"i thought you were a skank."
-__-
it's always nice hearing opinions like that, isn't it.
i think it was a good thing that i had enough self-control to refrain from letting fly with my fists and telling him what my own opinion and first impression of him had been.
i don't even know why it bothered me so much. usually krystle and i can't get enough of joking around and teasing each other about being skanky.. ["dude, your skirt isn't short enough!" or "jeez why don't you put more eyeliner on, krystle!"] hmm. oh wait, now i DO know. the keywords there are "JOKING AROUND".. it's entirely different when someone actually thinks you ARE something for real.
it kind of stings, really. i guess it hurts a little more than i'd like to let on. and it makes me angry. there's a shitload more i'd like to bitch about, in relation to conway thinking he fucking well knows everything, but one incident in particular stands out in my memory - the whole messaging thing last week with yejiun and myself. needless to say, i haven't told ANYONE about what was said between us, so i don't see what the fuck gives conway the right to think he knows everything about yejiun's personality, let alone things about me, and to say "i told you so..." when he doesn't even know what the fuck was going on in the first place. i'd dearly love to go into more detail there, because hell, everyone knows how much i love bitching about things. but i think for once i'm guna do the manly thing and refrain, since it's not guna resolve anything anyway.
oh, and just for your information conway: what happened between him and myself is just as much my fault as it was his - him for using such an extreme choice of words, and me for reading into everything too much and interpreting it wrongly. [i know it's more than likely you'll eventually end up reading this at one stage or another, conway.]
pffft. actually i don't see why i should have to justify or defend ANYONE's actions.
nuts to this.

Let the dominoes keep falling...
~~>Tuesday 25.10.05<~~
mmmmYEAH i'm in a really good mood, for the first time in aaaages! =P i think it's due in part to having finally gotten that jap speaking interview assessment thing over and done with.. now all that's left to be done is the stupid PR assignment, and then cram like hell for the exams.
today actually turned out better than i'd anticipated. the speaking test was pretty much this one-on-one interview that was supposed to go for about 10 minutes. before your allocated 10 minute slot, you were supposed to show up 10 minutes early, sit down at the desk outside the room, and prepare for two unseen questions without being able to refer to your textbook or write anything down [you had to dump all your stuff inside the classroom while you sat outside]. i began to panick, but luckily clara from my wednesday class had shown up pretty early and she sat a little way away from me whispering answers when i needed help. [lol note that at this stage, i've pretty much given up on getting anywhere without a little *cough* help.. cheating has become pretty much second nature to nearly everyone in the class.. *sigh*]
but anyway.. judging from the marks the teacher ticked on my criteria sheet during the oral, i'd say i did okay.. not BRILLIANTLY, but i'll pass. and i've kinda given up on hoping for a 7 overall for jap [yeah.. at this stage i might as well kiss that 7 goodbye], so there's no point straining over the whole thing anymore. best to aim for a 6 i suppose. assuming i can actually pull that off. hah. >__>
actually now that i think about it, today was [and still is] just a huge waste of time. i didn't get any study done in the morning cuz i had to get to jap, and after the speaking test i was planning to photocopy this reading exercise that yejiiun had offered to lend me, then head straight home to work on that blasted PR assignment. i hadn't planned on meeting up with conway either, but i decided to be nice and get him a copy of the excerise too.
after finally photocopying the sheet, conway and i headed back to the classroom to return it to yejiun [he had yet to do his speaking test], and ended up sitting on the ground in the hallway with benny [who'd just done his], tay [who did his after benny], and that glen guy, for about half an hour. we just sat there, idly wasting the time away. unbelievable. after yejiun came out from his test, it suddenly dawned on me what a blatant waste of time we'd just let occur.
"duuude.. what are we waiting for??" was one of the first questions that came to mind. too bad i couldn't have asked myself that earlier. >__>
ah well.. on the bright side i managed to give my camera a sizeable workout today kekeke >=D oh and you can finally put a face to the NoisyFucker Patrol [as conway calls them] that've been mentioned OH so many times in this blog =P
click here to get to the album and see the results of today's photo taking.

Parents are the bane of technology's existance.
~~>Sunday 23.10.05<~~
parents and technology. those two words do NOT mix. it's like holding two giant magnets in your fists and trying to force both the negative ends together. it just does NOT work. parents simply do not understand technology, and hence any technology from the 1980s and onwards is just totally wasted on them.
today my parents told me off for supposedly emailing a photo of myself to carlos [carlos, my cousin in malaysia, not carlos from high school =P]. ooookay.. first of all, i DIDN'T email anything to carlos, he found my photo off that stupid hi5 website [and carlos if you ever end up reading this, not that you would, i'm guna kick your ass for telling your grandma about it!], and secondly.. who the fuck cares?? what's carlos guna do with it anyway? sell it to some underground fake I.D manufacturer in saramban? .___.
they were telling me off because they have this paranoid fear of photos circulating on the internet. like just because someone comes across your photo, you're in instant danger of being stalked, hunted down and molested. that, and your identity will be stolen. [yeap. with the single click of a mouse, there could be a million new yennys out there. that's right. >__>]
my mom: "you shouldn't email photos! you could send it to the wrong person!" [oh god, wouldn't that be tragic.]
my dad: "yeah, emailing photos is DANGEROUS!" [yeah. and you'd know ALL about, considering you send -5 emails a year. >__>]
-__= that's just one example of how paranoid my parents are.
*sigh*
on top of that, i think my dad is more fascinated with my new camera than i am. too bad he doesn't know jack shit about technology. for the last few days he's been bugging at me with all these stupid little photo opportunities, like "there's a flower outside! you wanna take a photo of it?" -__-
today he made me take a photo of this jackfruit he'd just cracked open. i stood there taking a few shots of it from different angles when suddenly he was like, "stop, stop, that's enough! don't take so many!"
.__.
for some reason, he seems to think that digital cameras have a limited life.. that is, you take a couple of photos, fill the memory up to capacity, and then it's time to buy a new one.
someone should REALLY educate him on that.. yeah.. they really should -__-

And the procrastination continues...
~~>Saturday 22.10.05<~~
i can't stop procrastinating!! it's so ridiculous! i have to finish the last 3 chapters of marketing by the end of tomorrow, as well as get a move on with my feature article for that stupid PR portfolio [which by the way, i neglected to finish the other night, even though i swore i would -__- shows how good my promises are].
came online to print out lect notes to use as a study guide, but i haven't even done that yet. instead, here i am wasting time online blogging.. today i got about half a chapter of study done. VERY unproductive, considering my target was two chapters. DAMN. hellooooo.. HELLOOOO, willpower?? where ARE you?!
went to sunnybank for a bit with jaclyn today. it was supposed to be a study break, but clearly i didn't deserve one, as i'd done jack all study to begin with -__- last night at about 1am i had the biggest craving for KFC chips [moe knows haha.. i'm guna blame him for bringing that craving on =P] so today i attempted to satisfy that craving. too bad it didn't work.. i'd STILL eat KFC anytime kekeke >=D sunnybank was filled with a shitload of people today, i think mostly because the shopping centre was celebrating its 30th birthday.. at one point we saw people wheeling around a giant birthday cake that had been half consumed, looking for people to give the remaining pieces away to. [actually i read a while ago in the junk mail that the cake cutting and serving would take place at 10am. by the time we got to sunnybank it was about 2.30pm. so how long had they been wheeling that cake around for, with it open and exposed, dairy cream and icing melting away? go figure.. no wonder no one wanted a piece of it anymore -__-]
hmm.. it seems yejiun's suddenly on speaking terms with me again. bizarre, cuz i'd thought from my last message that i'd sent, he would've picked up on a note of finality in my tone and word choice. guess not. he's being all nice, and even offered to share the exercises they'd done in jap class that i'd left early on wednesday. hah. i guess Considerate Yejiun is back from the drycleaners or something. *cough* dry sarcasm *cough*
well enough said, it's time to get a-printing sons!

And now.. let the cramming begin!
~~>Friday 21.10.05<~~
hmm.. today was quite an interesting day, to say the least.. lol -__- started off quite well actually.. my baby is finally here!! w000t!! lol that's right.. my new digicam that i ordered up from sydney. i'm very, very pleased with the whole thing.. camera AND service. i actually ordered the camera last friday, but if you take out the delays [which weren't in any way the company's fault], the whole deal would've only taken 4 days in total. very, very speedy indeed.. in fact i'm so impressed that i'm going to recommend them to anyone and everyone who's willing to listen =P go here: www.umart.net.au
anyways, moving right along keke.. it was quite rainy today, which was kinda depressing.. i had to get to a group meeting by 1, which proved quite hazardous. to get to the bus stop at sunnybank required driving along flooded roads [i'm not kidding.. driving in the far left lane of mains road was incredibly scary, as the gutters were completely flooded and to make matters worse, visibility was extremely poor.. it was literally pissing down rain!]
finally got to uni, where the REAL stress began. [i'm still feeling these weird butterflies in my stomach even now, and it's nearly 9.30pm.. i don't know why.. >__<] our group assignment was due in at 4pm, and we still hadn't finished. tammy had yet to finish her part, and although we were all doing our best to scrape things together, everything was coming along soooo slowly.. i've gotta say, this was probably the most worst group assignment i've ever been involved in.. seriously. cuz we were so pressed for time, and all the other factors that kept popping up earlier in the semester... we didn't even get to proofread the whole thing cuz we ran out of time.. at 10 to 4, we suddenly realised we wouldn't HAVE enough time to continue proofreading the rest of the assignment and still do a contents page as well. so we had no choice but to just give up, on account of wanting to print the entire thing out, get it stapled and run to Z block to hand it in before the deadline.
and that's when things turned manic.
i never knew 36 pages could take so long to print... >__> after that things are just kind of a blur. all i remember is all four of us racing out of the computer lab in the library, and up the stairs like a herd of wild buffalo on a rampage. rebecca took off to Z block to try to delay the collection of assignments, while tamara and i rushed the assignment to the printworks on level 4 to get it stapled. and wouldn't you know it, the stapler wouldn't go through because the bundle of papers was too damn thick! we jammed about 3 staples into the bundle before deciding that would have to do, and then running helter skelter down the stairs and out the door to Z block.
and i kid you not, i have not run that fast in about three years. racing down the stairs in the library, we managed to bowl over about thirty crazy asians coming UP, who of course all turned to stare at us as we pelted away. it was even harder trying to weave around the people heading into Z block along that narrow, ridiculous little bridgeway.. we had to yell out, "excuse me, thank you, sorry!" over and over again as we ran, dodging everyone's dirty glares for being pushed out of the way.
people [well mostly the asians, of course] turned to stare, and hey, i guess i can't blame them. looking back on it now i guess it must've looked pretty funny. three asians clutching a fistful of flapping papers running for their lives into Z block. i guess it was quite exciting really. lol.
we finally made it.. only to discover the assignments had already been collected.. and we'd missed the deadline..
-________-
but the ladies were real nice, and were kind enough to accept our assignment anyway.
AHHAHAHA wasn't that just the biggest anti-climax just then?! =P lol

Little Miss Bitch-a-holic...
~~>Thursday 20.10.05<~~ entry #2 -__-
hmm.. i came back on with the intention of continuing with bitching about what was in my previous post.. but it seems i'm in a slightly better mood now, so maybe i'll refrain?
i don't know why but earlier tonight at uni i was just feeling like absolute shit. for several hours i just sat in the library nearly collapsing from fatigue and hunger and feeling lousy and angry and dismal and seething at the same time, because of several other factors.. but then eventually it just kinda wore away and i felt slightly better again.. bizarre. o_o i hate this feeling..
for the majority of the day, in fact, i just felt shit. walking to my law and ethics tute, i felt incredibly down for some reason.. no idea why.. as i passed by the library, i saw matt, shanny's friend. saying hello to him only made me feel more depressed, although i have no idea why.. >__< continuing the walk to L block, i saw frank, whom i haven't seen in aaaaages.. and by that time i felt ready to lose it. for some reason frank smiling a greeting at me made me wana break. at that point i was ready to burst into tears and bury my face in his grey t-shirt and blubber away.. and hell.. frank and i aren't even good friends. so needless to say, i don't think that would've gone down too well >__> i continued on to my tute where i sat for an hour unable to concentrate, writing down notes at a speed which would've rivaled a snail for the "world's slowest" title.. *sigh*
okay now i feel like bitching again, so i think i will. >__>
i know conway's dying to know this [well okay, maybe not DYING, because i'm sure he's got better things to do with his time than get involved in my messy little bitch situations with international students].. hmm okay i guess that should've been a slight give away.
it was yejiun who'd been sending those messages.
what really shits me off about this guy is that he's so freaking inconsistent.. in the blink of an eye, his entire personality seems to change. one minute he'll be friendly, and in the next instant he's turned all distant and cold. it's like he can't, or won't, just pick ONE of his numerous, multiple split personalities and damn well stick with it. i bet in the morning he wakes up, throws open the door to his wardrobe and says something along the lines of, "hmmm.. i believe.. today i will try.. Dickhead Yejiun. because Considerate Yejiun from yesterday is too much effort to maintain."
it confuses the shit out of me because i don't know what to think, or how i should be thinking. simply because i can't understand him. i don't know what to make of the things he said because hey.. who the hell KNOWS what he's damn well thinking. i get the feeling he's just trying to jerk me around, or it's all just one big cruel joke devised by him and his buddies because they have nothing better to do with their time. everytime i get a msg from him, this image pops up in my head of him and his noisyfucker buddies crowded around, snickering and scoffing as they peer over his shoulder at his mobile.
i hate it.
i'm still stumped. i think maybe because he's an international student, his choice of words came out a little *cough* WRONG. maybe he doesn't realise how extreme those kind of words are.
and then i get that image of him laughing up his sleeves at me and my blood starts to boil again.
oh well. he'll be pissing off back to malaysia pretty soon enough anyway.
.__.
wow. what a horrible thing to say. oh my. i really am a nasty biatch.
well.. i really had hoped that we could end our "acquaintanceship" [if you can even call it that] on somewhat of a positive note since he's leaving after the end of this sem.. but i suppose after today, that's not feasible anymore.
i think i might end this blog here. need sleep before tomorrow's group meeting. *sigh*

Little Miss Blog-a-holic...
~~>Thursday 20.10.05<~~
it seems i've become addicted to blogging now.. *sigh*
right now, i'm sitting in the library with gary, tamara and rebecca, rushing a last-minute effort towards our group assignment that's due tomorrow. i'm only blogging on here because i've finished my part and i think it's entirely legitimate for me to do so since all them guys have been doing for the last half hour is sit around and talk in cantonese -__-
it doesn't really matter though.. somehow we'll end up scraping it together, even if it takes us all night.. *sigh*
i'm soo not in the mood to be here right now =( my head hurts, i'm hungry and unbelievably tired at the same time, and i just wana curl up and sleep right here, right now, in front of the computer.. bathing in the warmth of its fan and the glow from the monitor.. =(
and on top of that, been sending messages back and forth with somebody this afternoon, who's been nothing but confusing. some of the things said have totally blown out of proportion what i perceived to be something of an acquaintanceship. if that makes any sense. probably doesn't. too tired to read/think straight right now. i'd really like to tell them what i think of them, but i don't think i can or will. i don't know if they're lying either. just trying to jerk my strings around like how i should've been wary about to damn well begin with.
mm. i wanna crawl into a hole and collapse right now. -__-

Little Miss Cheat-a-holic...
~~>Wednesday 19.10.05<~~
hmm.. today was my very last lesson of jap.. =( this week is the last week of classes, next week the REAL cramming begins. i feel somewhat sad, because i really have grown to love jap class.. like i've said before, it's definitely the best unit i've done since i started uni.. *sigh* and sadly, i didn't even stay for all of it -__- i cut class early with conway, because i didn't have my workbook, and there wasn't anyone to talk to after maria left. tay and yeejiun who'd been sitting on the other side of me were just talking and talking to each other in crazy asian as usual. that, and right after the test, they ran outside for a cigarette break and came back reeking of smoke. it was kind of hard to stomach, being right next to them and having to breathe in the fumes radiating off their clothes. i'm kinda regretting leaving early now though. i feel bad for the teacher, [alot of people just got up and left after the listening test in the first 20 minutes], and also i didn't say goodbye to some of the people that i would've liked to. *sigh*
so.. listening test ay.. lol. today i was surprised when tay came in and sat down right next to me instead of sitting one seat away like he usually does. [we all seem to have taken to sitting in the back row now.] but then it all made sense when five minutes before the test tay was like, "ah later can you let me copy your answers?" >__> my first reaction should have been to grab a chunk of his hair in my fist, snap his head back at a lethal angle, and snarl, "what the fuck did you just say punk?!" but i think i was too shocked to actually DO anything, and i ended up just blinking at him and saying "uh.. okay.. but if the answers are wrong it's not my problem."
maria, who'd attended our class today because she can't get to hers tomorrow [due to working at the indy.. w00t!!], was on the other side of me going, "what the fuuuuck!!" [she's been opposed to cheating ever since she caught some chick in her thursday class cheating on the katakana test.]
... heh. i guess if you look at it on the positive side [if that's even possible.. it's more like positive irony..] at least he asked beforehand, unlike yejiun who'd just helped himself to my answers last time without me even knowing.
but in the end i guess it kinda worked out, because the test was shit hard! [let me just repeat how bullshit the whole ordeal was.. that practice test we ran through yesterday was NOTHING at all like the real one. jeez, and we thought they spoke too fast yesterday.. today was like WOAH.. slooow down, fatty!] yeah.. in the end it worked out alright because when i was stuck on some of the questions, tay would have his sheet shoved conveniently close to mine with the answers. at one point i was even filling in answers on maria's sheet for her. in fact, i think pretty much the entire back row was cheating off each other.. answers were being passed up and down like a chain of people playing chinese whispers. later on conway told me that even benny had been in on it [sitting next to jolly], which was somewhat of a comfort. sounds whack, i know.. but it's comforting to think that even one of the brainiest guys in the class had found the test so hard that he'd had to resort to cheating. makes me feel a little better because i'm sure i did really shittily in that test.
after bumming with conway for a bit before he left to play DDR with that beckie chick from class, jimmeh and i went for our traditional korean ice cream.. mmm.. *drool* lol. it's a tradition that i'm definitely sorry to see come to an end.. *sigh*
mmmmYEAH i can't WAIT till the holidays.. *sigh* i'm definitely sorry to see this semester come to an end, but let's face it.. the stressing and panicking and slitting of wrists over these end of sem exams and assignments isn't really much fun now, is it.. and although my exam schedule is an absolute biatch - 3 exams in 3 days, dang-nammit! - there IS an up side.. at least it'll be over quickly. not necessarily painlessly, but definitely quickly. which i suppose is good. everything will be over in one quick, swift motion.. sort of like ripping off a bandaid.
i'm looking forward to a niiiice long 3 month break.. yeeeah.. a nice solid, block of relaxation, endless pearl teas, and killing time with friends.. mmm.. it'll be niiice.. *drool*
hmm.. enough dreaming i suppose. back to work sons.. =( toodle-oo!

Procrastination is bliss... [as is ignorance]
~~>Tuesday 18.10.05<~~
w00t!! so guess what i did today!! *ding ding ding* that's RIGHT.. as the title of this blog suggests, my sons, i PROCRASTINATED the day away.. i'm feeling a little guilty atm, but i'm in a pretty good mood right now, so for now the endorphins will override the feelings of extreme shame and guilt =P
today i finally bought myself a tub of kimchi, and when i got home i proceeded to sit down and devour as much as i could fit into my already full stomach.. which is probably why i'm in a good mood. people say chocolate gives you endorphins, but i think in my case kimchi does.. hahaha >__<
after jap today i wandered around the city with conway for bit, trying to suss out madtongsan's competition in the elizabeth street arcade and surrounding areas for my marketing assignment - at the last minute i decided throwing in a positioning map wouldn't go astray. it was somewhat interesting looking at different food places.. gives me an idea of places i'd like to try eating at in the future. mmm.. cheapness.. *drool* LOL.
after dropping off krystle's resume at her place, we went to garbo to kill more time. conway was working on this sort of photo documentary [haha yes, somewhat like mine except more PRODUCTIVE - his is actually getting somewhere. and as far as i know, he's not going to just give up after day two like i did =P] basically he was trying to get photos of anything and everything he could poke fun at [i.e. skank chicks, tryhard wannabe guys, stereotypical asians, and the like..] we made it just in time to catch the flood of mac high people come pouring through the doors of garbo, and i think some of the shots he got of them [that incidentally i took FOR him, because i have no shame and if i feel like doing something, i WILL] were pretty good. VERY good example of some "typical" stereotypes if i do say so myself. i also saw marki, that i'd ran into at the bus stop a few weeks back. shoulda got conway to get a snapshot of him and his asianised hair keke =D
i was reading some of conway's blog before.. hahaha once again, it cracks me up. i thought i was good at expressing myself blatantly with total disregard for what people think.. but i think conway puts the icing on the cake. i copied and pasted this [conway if you're reading this, hopefully you won't mind lol. and if you do, then too bad!! you should've used anti-select and anti-rightclick scripts in your site =P]:
I started to get cold and wanted some curry to warm me up good so I headed for winter garden the gathering places of Asian (I really want to stop going there but the food is quite cheap there and the store I usually go to in the dymocks building ran out of rice lol). Got my lunch and noticed 2 guys from my Japanese class was there, I�ll refer to them as Noisyfucker 1 and Smart Noisyfucker and I was surprised Noisyfucker 2 wasn�t there but there were two other fobbies there to actually replace them which I will refer to as IT geek and accounting addict (I�m really being biased)...
oh and in response to that.. i actually thought conway meant he saw yejiun and tay, but "smart noisyfucker" kind of insinuates otherwise.. cuz yeah.. *cough* smart is probably a word better suited to benny rather than either one of those two. but anyway. if he meant that tay wasn't there, i think it's cuz he was in the library, quite possibly doing work! [i'm pretty sure i saw him there.. that cold day in hell must be freezing over again -__-]
last night i ate at madtongsan with tammy.. i finally got to try their kimchi fried rice [which i've been hankering to try for aaaages now!! >__<] lol.. needless to say, i enjoyed it.. because hey.. it's KIMCHI!! need i say anything else? =P
i'm kinda surprised at how easy tammy is to talk to.. not that i'd thought she was stuck up or anything in the first place, but i find in general it's alot easier to talk to guys than it is to girls.. on account of most girls being way too bitchy. so yeah.. i guess i was surprised. of the chicks i've met this sem at uni, i'd say only a few are REALLY the kind that are easy to talk to.. every chick that i've met is nice.. but usually the conversation stops awkwardly after about five minutes, and we'll just sit in silence waiting for some kind of god-send interruption to kill the awkwardness. [actually this sem, i've found that i've opened up a lot more and started talking to more people randomly. quite possibly a result of taking japanese, because most of the people in my classes seem really nice and approachable, and jap is the unit in which i've met the most people. as a result, i make attempts to talk to more people in my other subjects too. i'm surprised at myself, since i used to be extremely introverted, but i think it's a good thing? i like talking to nice people and making friends, i suppose .__.] but anyway.. with tammy i found i could actually say things without feeling like an idiot, or without her shooting me a look of disapproval like so many other females tend to do. so yeah.. it was nice =] it's awesome being able to talk and laugh over silly things without the other person looking at you in disdain.
hmm.. that being said.. tammy said she'd gotten a christmas casual position with myer, which was kind of a painful jolting reminder of my unsuccessful application. they haven't contacted me about it since the interview, so i'm going to assume it was unsuccessful. although tomorrow i think i'll give them a call just to check up on it anyway. no harm in trying i guess. earlier i called this guy who's opening a cafe in sunnybank to apply for a position there. i'm not too sure how that went down. i feel like i kinda made a fool of myself by saying things wrongly, and also because i don't really have the right coffee-making credentials to brag about [i don't think donut-shop milkshakes and instant coffee really cut it in the cafe industry =P]. but he seemed nice enough and asked me to email my resume in.. so yeah.. *fingers crossed*
well.. i suppose it's time for me to start cramming for tomorrow's jap listening test. argh. i'm still in half minds as to whether i should try to wreak revenge on yejiun for cheating off me on the last test.. lol. guess i'll see what kind of mood i'm in tomorrow. let's hope for his sake i stock up on kimchi before i get to uni =P
fare thee well, sons.

uncle yenny LOVES her k-pop.. yes, she does.. YES she does!! lol =P
~~>Sunday 16.10.05<~~
so.. another day come and gone, it's just past 4pm and i'm sitting on my bum in front of my computer, as i have been since 10 this morning. and what do i have to show for the last 6 hours? well.. nothing really.
i typed up my final part for that services marketing assignment, and tomorrow we'll hopefully be stringing it all together. oohhh maan there's guna be a looot of editing going on after tomorrow's meeting. >__> *brings dictionary*
i'm glad to announce that my portfolio for PR is now three-quarters finished [although before i started on it today, it was nearly three-quarters finished anyway, all i did was put the finishing touches on the media release]. unfortunately, the same can't be said for my proposal to accompany the portfolio, because THAT, my sons, is nothing but a heap of jumbled up, bumbly, rubbish sentences strung together haphazardly because i had no idea how to express what i wanted to say eloquently. i believe the proper name for that is "brain dumping", although that's probably just my attempt to make myself seem more productive than i really am.
throughout the day, i managed to maintain my sanity by watching a combination of music videos and little clips of shinhwa [and to a lesser extent, kangta] doing random and silly things. lol that probably in part [or perhaps ENTIRELY] contributed to my immense wasting of time.. *sigh* but one clip i stumbled across that i really like is this one.. lol i find it rather amusing, especially when dongwan, [or perhaps it's eric - i still haven't grown accustomed to distinguishing among them. the only one i recognise on a regular basis is minwoo *drool*], attempts to pop open the bottle cap with his eye socket. how disturbing -__- i'm also intrigued by .asx files, which i previously had held some kind of phobia of. for some reason, .asx files are capable of compressing good quality media into something very, very small.. the clip linked above is apparently only 4kb..?? O_O how is that logically possible?? =O
ah well.. that's a mystery i'll have to solve next time.. for now.. back to watching my video clips and progressing veeery, veeeeery sloooowly on my proposal. and mark my words, by tonight my proposal AND my portfolio will be finished. FINISHED!!! >=(
later days, sons!

~~>Saturday 15.10.05<~~
I refuse to give in to my blues
That's not how it's going to be
...
I'll get over you.. I know I will
I'll pretend my ship's not sinking
And I'll tell myself I'm over you
'cause I'm the king of wishful thinking..
...
w00t.. *deflated cheer* i think that passion for/obsession with japanese that i had so brightly rekindled at the start of the semester is rapidly dwindling. i am SO over jap right now. i can't be stuffed studying for the listening test on wednesday, although i know that i'll end up having to cram it in alongside my hectic services marketing study regime somehow..
after tomorrow, we're down to week 13 already.. eeep >__< can't believe how fast time has flown huh. *sigh*
and you'd think that with only 2 weeks to go until my exams start, i'd be fully cramming for everything. but noo00o0o0o. why the fuck hasn't my brain switched to study mode yet?! gaaargh who bloody well knows!! by right i should be devoting every breathing moment to cramming. no time to waste. can't afford to squander my natural resources. -__- i don't have the energy to be angry anymore. i'm over the whole yejiun/listening test thing, and regan's lack of gratitude for the things we bought for her baby [btw i heard from krystle her baby was born.. today! hmm. i suppose that calls for a celebration of some sort, but i think i'm entitled to refrain from it if i damn well feel like it, on account of her lousy friendship, or should i say LACK thereof], and chan and his blatant fucking lies. rather than be angry, i think it's best if i just remain indifferent and neutral on these things. yeah. my energy is too scarce to waste right now. jeez. as if i'm not already tired enough during the daytime. i seem to be crashing alot in my classes now. maybe i should up the caffeine intake.
there's this constant pressure i feel that won't leave me alone. it's like having a 300 pound fire-breathing dragon standing right behind me, flexing his claws and breathing raspily down my neck. impending doom. i think that's the feeling pretty much summed up in two words. i feel totally screwed. screw-diddly-ewed. i have until the end of this week to cram the rest of my services marketing exam material into my brain, so that i can spend 5 days of next week cramming in 10 weeks of business law and ethics. on top of that i've somehow gotta juggle that jap listening test this wednesday, the jap oral/interview the tuesday after that, that massive PR assignment due the friday after, and somehow study for the jap exam. it's fkn retarded. the jap exam is on the same day as the business law exam, which is the first step in screwing me over. the business law exam is at 8.30 in the morning. i mean JEEZ. 8fucking30.. who the hell gets UP at 8.30, let alone makes it to uni by that time?! that exam goes for 3 and a half hours [yet another factor in the screwed-up-ness], so by the time i finish i'll be fkn exhausted. then i get to wait around for 2 hours for the jap exam at 1.30. yay, lucky me!
*sigh* ah i guess i should stop bitching and just get on with it. i'll just have to bite the bullet and deal with it. on the bright side, in only 2 and a half weeks, i'll be free... free-diddly-EE!! w000t!! *drools in anticipation*
but till then i guess i'd better knuckle down and actually get some work done. wish me luck >__>
*uncle yenny signing out*

Time is running out...
~~>Wednesday 12.10.05<~~
Don't stray, don't ever go away
I should be much too smart for this
You know it gets the better of me
Sometimes when you and I collide
I fall into an ocean of you
Pull me out in time, don't let me drown, let me down
I say it's all because of you...
And here I go
Losing my control
I'm practicing your name so I can say it to your face
It doesn't seem right to look you in the eye
And let all the things you mean to me
Come tumbling out my mouth...
...
there's so much i want to tell you, so much i want you to know..
beneath my shield, my exterior, the weak defence i put up... and beyond all the swearing, and the cruel things i say about you... i want to tell you that i really do care about you.
the things i say to you are meaningless. they're just words i would say to anyone. but the things on the inside are not.
more than anything, i wish i could have a chance to explain myself. the reasons why i do the things i do, and why i say the hurtful things i say. i want the chance to assure you that the actions you see and the words that you hear are nowhere near a reflection of the way i think and feel.
i wish i could tell you that i'm sorry.
knowing how things could be between us causes so much pain. just imagining the way things could be now brings on nothing but heartache.
i want to be there for you. i want to be your friend. i need you to be my friend. i need to know that you care too, that i'm not just in this alone. i need to hear your reassurance, that all the wrongs that happened between us in the past don't matter anymore.
so many things i want to say... but can't.
...
And there's no cure, and no way to be sure
Why everythings turned inside out
Instilling so much doubt
It makes me so tired, I feel so uninspired
My head is battling with my heart
My logic has been torn apart
And now, it all turns sour
Come sweeten every afternoon...
...
Say you'll stay, don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
I need to know all about you...

~~>Tuesday 11.10.05<~~
how do i do it? how do i manage to befriend all these kinds of.. people..?! jeez. it's like i have a giant neon sign planted on the top of my head that says "USE ME, i'm na�ve". a sign which lights up and flashes especially fast when manipulative people are within my vicinity.
today we got the results of our jap listening test back. okay okay, conway's already told me it's really not a big deal, but i feel like having a bitch up, so i'm damn-diddly-amn guna do so!
i scored 18.5 out of 20, which i was really surprised and quite happy about [not bad considering i fluked my way through most of it huh]. then i saw the results of yejiun's test. and wouldn't you know it - 18.5 as well. since he didn't come to class, i took the liberty of grabbing his and comparing it with mine. and hey, what do you know.. he'd gotten the same marks for each question as i had, he had the exact same answers as i did, right down to the exact same ones i'd gotten wrong. go figure. coincidence? a pretty fucking big one if you ask me, considering he was sitting right next to me in the test.
okay so i'm not really in a position to go bitching about people cheating, because hey.. i did sit that test having been given some prior information about the questions and content of some of it. it's not the cheating i'm pissed about, but more so the feeling of being used, or preyed upon. that sinking, hollowing feeling you get when you know you've just been duped, or sucked in, or ripped off. and that's what's irking me now. also, i have no idea how the hell he managed to copy everything off me. admittedly, he looked kinda stuck and desperate and i felt sorry for him, so i flashed him a really brief glimpse of one of my papers right before i handed it at the end. however, that was only ONE question, and that was right at the end of the test. i never consented to letting him see my answers before that. so what the fuck.. how did he manage to get all the answers to the previous 4 questions?? as far as i can recall, i had my head down really low, so much so that my hair was grazing the top of the desk. how he managed to see the answers through my curtain of hair is simply beyond me.
it just shits me off that he gets a nice, big, fat 7 next to his name for the listening test [because it IS a 7.. 92.5%!] when he did shit all in preparation for it, and the only reason he got that 7 is because he stole answers off someone who had no idea about it. it's just so sneaky! i can think of numerous other people who could have done with that 7, that i would rather have shared my answers with!!
gaargh! well that's my gripe for today. i think i'd better start thinking positively or i won't be able to study for tomorrow's kanji test. it's hard to study when you're in a lousy mood. -__-
last night as part of our group meeting for marketing, gary, rebecca, tammy and i went to eat at that little cafe thing that's just one block away from uni. [LOL doesn't that sound productive.. "hey guys, it's meeting time, but let's go EAT instead!"] the food was alot better than i'd expected, although i hadn't eaten there in a long time. at least not since they'd apparently changed management or something. tamara ordered me this chicken and mushroom crepe thing, because she refused to let me eat nachos on account that nachos are "too greasy". lol. it was pretty good.. a little soggy though. but not bad. i might actually consider eating there again .__. but what really surprised me was as we went in rebecca came up behind me and kinda slung her arms around me. LOL that's right, crazy asian style. [good GOD, am i turning into one of THEM??!?! noo00o0o, NEVER!! =P] i was genuinely surprised that she was readily displaying so much affection towards me, especially since gary and i have done nothing but bitch about her and her tardiness to meetings since day one. but yeah.. it was nice =] i like being hugged. keke =P
after dinner i walked back to uni with rebecca and we went to work on the assignment in the library - another surprise. she actually wanted to help me with the blueprinting, which surprised the crap out of me. if i'd been her, i probably would've been like "pffft, nuts to that. do it yourself you lazy slag!"
*sigh* how nice. i guess that'll teach me not to bitch about people so much. -__-
well.. that being said, it's time for me to get a crack on with tonight's workload. later days, sons.

~~>Sunday 09.10.05<~~ *happy bday to holly for yesterday =]*
well hasn't this weekend been productive..? =S socially, perhaps. work-wise, definitely not. *sigh*
my fahjah actually consented to lending me his car on saturday night [w00t! *dies in shock*] and somehow i managed to get conway to come to romeo's birthday party with me. i'm kinda surprised, because if i'd been in his position i probably would've responded with a big, fat "NO". [i'm not big on going to events where the only person you'll know is the person who's dragging you along, but that person will know the majority of the other people there -__-] we didn't stay long though, which can be a good or a bad thing.. depends on how you look at it i suppose. i only have a couple of decent photos to produce from the party though.. dang lousy camera. well.. i'll post them up in a bit [keep your eyes on the album].
before the party, i caught the bus from sunnybank to the city to meet conway. on the way to the bus stop, i passed this hmm.. middle-aged, i suppose, white guy, who was just sitting on the bench. as i walked past, he mumbled something at me. i guess he'd just assumed i was one of those brainless, asian bimbo chicks who don't know how to speak english, or who are used to having derrogatory comments thrown at them as they walk down the street. so i stopped, turned to face him and said, "i'm sorry?" partly because i wasn't sure i'd heard him correctly, and partly because i wanted to make him squirm.
when he realised i was perfectly capable of speaking english, he sort of cringed, but forced himself to repeat what he'd said, this time alot more humbly. "uh i said i'd sure like to take you home."
...
men should NOT be allowed to degrade women and get away with it.
i bared my teeth in the bitchiest smile i could muster, and sat down. at which point he got up and walked away.
yenny, one. chauvanist freak man, ZERO.
and that, my sons, was my lousy start to the night.
LOL things picked up a little in the city though. conway and i pretty much just wandered around aimlessly, then as we passed by replay this lady in a pink dress came stumbling out of a doorway. i thought she'd tripped because there was a little step there, so i stopped to ask her if she was okay. turned out she was pissed off her face. her hair was all wet, she was clutching one pink stiletto in one hand, and she was after my shoes. apparently she'd "lost her other shoe in a taxi" and she needed a pair of shoes to get into the place she'd just stumbled out of. at first i thought she was joking, until she began to follow us, offering a hundred dollars for my thongs. LOL. it was kinda scary actually.. most of the time, she was directing her words at my feet, like as though she was talking to my thongs, or getting ready to lunge forward and rip them off my legs. she kept pursuing us and finally we just RAN. >__< freaky city people!!
eventually we headed back to sunnybank and i drove to romeo's place. yeah. like i said before, we didn't stay long. basically in the short time that we were there it was just a bunch of guys, with the exception of myself and little kimmy dearest, of COURSE, standing around the pool table, drinking. you could literally smell the testosterone and *cough* macho-ness flying around the room. at the end, just before we left, i attempted to make polite conversation with one of the guys that i didn't know, who was tagging around bevan. what a waste of time.
me: "so.. do you go to QUT?"
him: "no."
after that he didn't bother to say anything else and even started to turn away, so i just said goodbye to bevan and walked off in disgust. fucken oath.
hmm.. went to this nice little dessert place in the valley with jaclyn and conway, it was really nice. i'm just sorry i didn't know about the place earlier! lol =P it's definitely somewhere i'll be going back to in the future. they specialise in these really pretty [and probably tasty too!] desserts. i took photos of the desserts jaclyn and conway ordered [will post up soon].. seriously.. they're like a work of art..
hmm.. there's a fair bit more that i'd like to blog about, but it looks like i'm running out of time. i really need to start work on my assignment. damn. i took some photos of holly and jaclyn at holly's place today, i'll attempt to post them up too.
later days, sons =]

~~>Friday 07.10.05<~~
*sigh* yeeap. i did it again. i managed to make a dickhead of myself in front of the one person i swore i wouldn't. why the hell do i keep trying.. why?! i'm such a loser. gargh. i think i need some homemade prozac. too bad we're out of paddlepops in the freezer =(
soo.. yesterday it was something like 35 degrees in brisbane, which pretty much made time slow to a crawl and made you wish you could just keel over and die. i guess that cold day in hell must be continuing.. all the heat from hell must be rising up into middle earth -__- jeez.. how long are the days in hell anyway?! like 72-hour long days?! >=( it's barely a week into october, which means we're not even halfway through spring yet! so you can just imagine what summer's guna be like.. oohhhh yeaaarh.. summer's guna come with a vengeance this year =(
last night i spent some quality time with krystle and her family [pfft.. yeah.. like i'm not already over at their house often enough, now i'm intruding on their family dinners too. hey, gather round everyone, it's like free for all! -__-] we went to eat at the casino, marco polo to be exact, which is somewhere i've never eaten before. ah.. to be honest, i didn't think the food was that fantastic, especially not for that price [i'd say i thoroughly enjoyed eating at blackjack's more, but then again maybe because that's buffet =P].. casino food is overrated, and definitely overpriced. but yeah.. it was nice. the atmosphere and everything. i like spending time with my "bubby". buahahaha.. *cough* inside joke *cough*
hmm.. i just went and re-downloaded some music on limewire that i used to have on my comp but, for whatever reasons, got deleted. most probably the result of oomrar re-formatting my comp earlier this year. there's nothing quite like a spree of illegitimate filesharing to raise your spirit. remember this song - "why don't you and i" by santana and chad kroeger of nickelback? mm.. that was one of my favourite songs in high school. lol. brings back good memories.. =]
*sigh* ah yes.. memories, memories.. oh to be a wizard and turn back time... -__-

~~>Wednesday 05.10.05<~~ second entry for today -__-
yeeap well i'm back.. twice in one day, HAH i bet you're sick of me now.
i'm in a slightly better mood now, despite the fact that my eyes feel like they're dying, my brain wants to curl itself up in my skull and sleep, and i've gotten myself into a position that i think i'd like to get out of - i said i would attend a certain function, but now i'm having second thoughts about it.
anyways *cough* so yeah. i read some of conway's blog before hahaha it cracked me up. i guess that's why my mood is slightly more healthy now. what's that saying again.. um.. laughter is the food of the soul, or some crap like that?? behh.. no idea..
conway's blog: "tuesday.. what surprised me is that yenny showed up 30 minutes early today. (must be a cold day in hell)"
LOL.. yeah that cracked me up to no end. i guess it IS a change. a welcome one, though. and even more astonishing.. today i was half an hour early again as well. lol i went and sat in the classroom by myself for half an hour.. how sad. ah well. i'd actually been an hour early, but i decided to go collect my PR tute piece off my tutor. i was quite happy with the result, she gave me all 6s, with the exception of one criteria, where i scored a 5.. but hey.. it's not so bad i guess =] you gotta learn to be happy with what you get, or what you already have.
so yeah. i sat in the classroom doing work - practicing for that blasted PR editing test that's coming up in a couple of weeks. argh.. i hate editing.. there're faaar too many symbols in my opinion, i mean jeez.. why can't they just stick to using a good old-fashioned red pen to go through, cross out, underline, or write in comments. nuts to all those stupid little symbols! it's crazy! they resemble the kind of symbols you find in maths B textbooks or physics prac write-ups.. like what the faaaaark!!
haha i guess that "cold day in hell" must've continued into today too. cuz today, for the first time, i saw tay doing work. LOL! unbelieveable.. he even made it to class EARLY too. he sat down a seat away from me, took one look at my sheet of nasty little algebraic-lookalike symbols then pulled out his own book and began working on something. hahaha i was shocked. shock-diddly-ocked =P
benny came in later and sat next to me, which was a relief. i like sitting next to benny, cuz he motivates me to work. this sounds really whack, but he motivates me to do work because i feel like a dumbass sitting next to him. i catch one glimpse of his unbearably neat, scrupulous notes, and i feel lousy for not working harder, and so i attempt to do so. for the remainder of the lesson anyway haha. and working with him is a real bonus cuz he seems to be one of the few people who actually TRY.. when we have to pair off to practice dialogues, he actually practices speaking the sentences in jap, so i'm motivated to do the same. it's good shiznit. whereas if i were sitting with, hmm, maria =P, i'd usually just blunder my way through the dialogues in english. yeap. the only thing i've come out of yesterday's lesson with is "donna tabemono ga kirai desu ka?" [what kind of food do you hate?] which is something we learnt back in like week 3. yeeap.. pretty sad.
unfortunately today i was feeling like shit. on top of feeling lousy about assessments and stress and whatnot, and tired from lack of sleep, i managed to get something in my eye not long after the lesson started, which prompted me to make a run for the bathroom [WHICH btw is conveniently located downstairs.. our class is on the second floor, and they have male toilets on that level, but not female toilets.. when you get down to the ground level, they have male toilets there again too! unbelievable huh!]. and hey, wouldn't you know it, the toilets were closed for cleaning, so i had to run out to the toilets in the next block >=( i kept having "mini-crashes" throughout class, where i just needed to put my head down on the table and close my eyes.
i dunno what the hell is wrong with me. it really blows.
well i guess that's my day in a nutshell? oh. i also bummed with jimmy after uni, which was cool. something we haven't done in a looong time since he's started working at the optometrist and he had a bunch of interviews for weeks before that. we went to the wintergarden and stocked up on greasy, greasy new york fries.. kakaka >=) saw benny and tay there too.. lol. *note to self: wintergarden must be like the international student area*
well yeah. THAT'S pretty much my day in nutshell. oh.. except for the group interview before uni.. but let's NOT talk about that -__-"
and that's my cue to exit!

more lessons of self-discovery...
~~>Wednesday 05.10.05<~~ *happy birthday ping =]*
so here's another thing i now realise - i just can't help myself. i am hopeless, completely lacking in willpower, my resolve is so damn insufficient.
i just can't help being nice to people even though i've warned myself not to. the people that i know only too well i should be cautious around. increase the waryness, my cognitive brain says, but the affective side of my brain does the opposite, and lowers the guard.
it sucks. i just can't help sinking back into old ways.
how sickening.

thank the stars for k-pop!
*ah.. after much ranting and raving, and stewing over things, i decided to edit this particular entry. well.. read away, if you will. =]*
~~>Tuesday 04.10.05<~~
lol.. that's right.. thank the stars for k-pop.. tacky, tacky k-pop.. =P i'm usually opposed to most forms of pop music, and music by the sechskies is BLATANT pop.. but i'm listening to one of their silly, boppy songs right now and it seems to have improved my mood quite significantly.. =}
i'm functioning on about 4 hours sleep right now.. i slept at 1.30 last night, woke up around 5.30, and after that tossed and turned like a whale in a fishing net, but still couldn't get back to sleep.. not good because we had a jap test today, and i had no intention of failing due to lack of brain power and ability to stay awake.. =(
i can't really explain how i feel at the moment. i've had this weird, fluttery kind of feeling in my stomach for the last few days, and through the holidays too.. =S i dunno what it is, or why it's there, and it irritates me to no end.. i don't know if it's because of hunger, or dehydration, or fatigue, or nerves.. it's frustrating.. i wish it would go away, or at least let me figure it out so i can damn well DO something about it.
i guess i can sort of put my finger on it, to an extent. i haven't really eaten properly for the last few weeks, i didn't manage to catch up on sleep during the holidays, and the nerves.. well i'm assuming the nerves are present because of all the assessments and stuff that've been going on lately.. such as the jap test today. although now that the test is over, i don't know why i still feel weird. i guess i'm kinda secretly hoping i can put it down to the job interview tomorrow. i dunno. if it's not that, then well.. i just don't know what to think. -__-
last night i bummed around sunnybank for a bit with that yejiun dude from jap [okay, so i've now learnt that his name is spelt yeejiun, and hey, i was only one letter off.. that's not so bad, right? but i'm guna continue to spell it as 'yejiun' because i like my own weird little bohemian interpretation of it better.. and also because i damn-diddly-amn feel like it! =P]
i actually thought it was alright killing time with him. okay, so i had fun. i guess i'm afraid to admit that because, like so many other things, i worry that the other person doesn't think or feel the same way as i did. but yeah. i thought it was pretty fun. purely because i'd expected him to be one of those lousy, crazy asians and it turned out that he wasn't. or it SEEMED that he wasn't anyway. i'm not willing to make any concrete statements right now, because i'm going through this period of self-doubt and i've lost all confidence in my ability to make accurate judgements.
and it was also fun because i thrashed his ass at air hockey. muahahaha.. challengers, apply here please! =P
i have said this before, but i'll repeat myself again hah: i'm really surprised at how good his english is. it kinda scares me. hmmm let's see.. i'll try to think of an example. mm okay. while walking around market square, i pointed out a honda in the parking lot and asked, "i guess you like honda?"
him: "yeah, they're okay."
me: "oh hah. i think they-'re o-ver-ra-ted."
[note that at this point, i'd just assumed that his english wasn't all that flash hot, since he IS an international student, and i made sure to speak reeaally slowly, and enunciate every syllable, in the hope that he might understand]
him: *speaking in totally normal speed* "yeah, they are overrated." then he shot me a funny look, like as though a few speech therapy sessions wouldn't have gone astray right then.
hah. and before that, while wandering around plaza [which was closed and hence there was nothing to do except wander around aimlessly just looking at random things], we stopped at every one of those giant fish tanks they have in the centre. in one tank there was this really bizarre looking creature, that looked as though it had many tiny, tiny, frilly little legs, or needle-thin spikes on the sides of its thin little body.
me: "wow.. check out that uh.. worm-looking thing. how freaky-deaky."
him: "oh yeah.. it's like a centipede."
so there you have it. he most likely speaks english even better than i do. i mean jeez.. "worm-looking thing?" O_O
[hah yeah okay, in case you couldn't tell, that comment above about speaking english better than me was a joke. sort of. the next day, krystle was like, "hahaha what the hell.. shit what's a centipede? i don't even know what a centipede is, and i'm not even one of those crazy asians!"]
i guess i've gotta admit i didn't really want to go because some stuff that conway said a while ago kinda got to me. but last night i decided to just forget about it, cuz fuck.. i'm always letting other people think for me, or plant ideas in my head. or i take things people say and stress and muddle and mull over them, and read into them the wrong way. but after today, and now that i think about it, maybe i should've listened to conway in the first place.. oh well. i suppose in time we'll see how things pan out.

w000t!! extension!! w000t!!
~~>Monday 03.10.05<~~
w000t!! here's something to surely lift anyone's mood: an assignment that i'd previously thought was due on friday of week 13 is actually due on the friday of the week AFTER week 13.. lol no, that's not week 14, because there's no such thing.. buahahaha.. hmm. -__-
i guess that's not REALLY an "extension" as such, since i'm the one who wasn't aware of the correct due date in the first place.. haha how misleading.
mmm.. so.. my PR tute finished a little early today.. which is a good thing i guess? i dunno.. it just means even more time to kill before i go home, since i'm not going to my marketing lect. i think the tutor wrapped up a little early cuz she had to go through all of jo's work before the next tute. LOL i bet she regrets offering her services now!! =P
yup.. hmm. well. hmmmmm. so it's just yoooou and me now, mr computer. >=)

~~>Sunday 02.10.05<~~
hmm so there i go again.. it doesn't take long, does it.. stupid, naive, idealistic me. always willing to take chances, always taking people by face value, never looking deeper, never looking past their pretences.
i suppose there's nothing you can do if you don't know they're just being fake. but i should've been more wary. "wake up and smell the coffee", as the saying goes. not everyone out there is genuine.
and it makes me angry. makes me angry because i just play right into their dirty little traps, their stupid, petty games, like a fool. it makes me angry that i'm so blind.
it's all very well to say "well, i've just gotta be more careful from now on." that's so much easier said than done.
never should've let my guard down in the first place.

Wow, you've really done it now, Uncle Yenny...
~~>Wednesday 28.09.05<~~ *happy bday to tuan-iE for yesterday*
lol so.. following that disasterously short hair cut from a week or so ago [which seems to have somewhat grown out a little now, praise be to pantene =P], i decided i would rectify the mess by putting random blonde streaks through my hair, to take the attention off the length. -__- needless to say that didn't work out all too well, and i ended up a patchy, blotchy freak for a while. finally, donning a hat, i set off to garden city in search of something to cover up the patchy blonde - and i decided to fudge my hair pink.
the result? well... i now have vivid fushia dandruff and nails stained pink, not unlike the colour of a drag queen's, and apart from gaining the midas touch for a few hours [everything around me to feel my touch turned into magical pink gold], i guess overall i'm pretty happy.
wow that sure was a long sentence. hahaha >__> did you digest it all?! =P
hmm.. well i've learnt a few lessons today. so, come, gather round sons, as uncle yenny teaches you a few lessons about fudge paintbox.. [lol not that you'd need any.. i'm sure no one is stupid enough to mong their hair up as bad as i manage to]..
1. fudge STAINS. fudge will stain anything and everything [except maybe glass or metal] it comes into contact with that has a porous surface.. today i managed to stain my nails, the nail polish ON my nails, my skin, the bathroom tiles, the grouting BETWEEN the tiles, and the bathroom sink.. w00t.. that's quite a record! it's a shame that fudge stains everything except your hair! and for something that's so temporary [fudge only lasts like 2 weeks in your hair, tops] it's damn hard to remove! i've been scrubbing and scrubbing but the evidence is still there -__- be especially careful with your skin. from behind, i think i could pass as an american red indian - my neck is stained that well.
2. IGNORE the directions on the box. well not all of them, of course. just the part that says "processing time takes 15-30 minutes." LIES!! 15 to 30 minutes is how long you leave it in if you want it to fade out after like 2 days! since it's not a potion that needs to be mixed [ie. mix colourant AND developer cream and then shake like crazy, for example with feria or garnier] leave it in your hair for as long as you can stomach. today i managed 5 hours [from 11 to 4], i would've left it in for longer but i got up late and i have only a limited number of hours before my mom gets home from work and starts the interrogation. i did read a case of someone leaving it in for 14 hours overnight, which i hope to pull off next time. stick your hair in a shower cap and sleep on it. [they recommend you use a shower cap or glad wrap to help the colour processing along anyway..]
3. that being said, try not to smush the fudge against your scalp. it is damn hard to get off! [i guess that's kind of hard to avoid though if you're guna be sleeping on it, as the weight of your head will smush the fudge against itself anyway]. i learned this the hard way when i sloshed the fudge on thickly, massaging it into my roots and consequently my scalp. the result is a thick layer of paint [which of course would figure - it IS called paintbox. kudos for fudge for not indulging in false advertising =P] covering your scalp. this can result in horribly bright coloured dandruff flakes that take on a texture similar to paint. i scrubbed at my head with my nails for a long time, but there're still quite a few blotches here and there. guess i'll work on those another time.
and finally, 4. when they say "bleach your hair beforehand for best results", they MEAN bleach it. i'm not kidding.. bleach that biatch GOOD! if you want standout results, your hair should be bleached white, if not extremely pale blonde, otherwise what you'll end up with is a gothic version of what you saw on the swatch sample. wow.. think of all that bleaching damage.. *shudder* it's not something i would recommend, unless you want split ends up to your ears, or unless you have it done professionally so as to minimise damage.
well yes. that concludes my lessons. more tips include: use a blowdryer after applying the colour - the heat will help the process along. and shampoo your hair beforehand [which they tell you to do anyway] to get rid of excess grease and dirt coating each strand of hair that will stop it from absorbing maximum colour.
w00t! this is uncle yenny, signing out. =P

~~>Monday 26.09.05<~~ *happy bday ngoc-iE ^__^*
LOL ooookay.. my eyes are like disintegrating from fatigue, and i feel like collapsing and never getting up, but BIG news! keke just kidding.. [i ripped that line off from that anime, gravitation.. K, the manager, tends to explode into a room going "BIG news!" hehehe -__- yes, yes, okay i'll shut up.]
so anyway.. i stumbled across something tonight that's guna keep me amused for many, many hours to come.. if anything, it's already stuck in my head and i can't shake it out.. damn annoying jingles! >=(
lol so what is it, you may ask?
hmm... hmmmmmm.. i dunno if i should tell you...
muahahaha!
no i'm kidding i'm kidding..
click *here* to find out ^__~
oh but i must warn you if you're not running on cable or adsl, or some form of remotely fast internet connection, then you might be waiting for a looooong time... =P and by clicking on it, it'll most likely chew up all the bandwith my geocities account has to offer.. also, it might help if you're a fan of korean boy bands [possibly even the manufactured kind]. haha but i'm willing to bet that 90% of people clicked on the link without first reading this warning part below.. lol. oh well.
alternatively, if that link doesn't work cuz the bandwidth has been exceeded, try here.
LOL and if THAT doesn't work, and the curiosity is really, really, REALLY killing you, you can email me and i'll send it to you.. ^__~
later days!

~~>Wednesday 21.09.05<~~
wow what an awesome day! don't mind me now while i sit here and space out about it =P i saw a bunch of people today, many of whom i haven't seen in aaaages.. which was a nice surprise ^__^ i thought it would be just another mediocre day but yeah.. guess you never know what'll happen =]
the kanji test went okay.. i'm secretly hoping for a good mark lol.. but you know how it is.. when you think you did well, you usually end up doing crap >__>"
omg and while i'm on the topic of jap.. those two malaysian guys in my jap class.. shit they can be so annoying -__- out of their little group of three, i swear, benny is the only one with brains cuz he keeps his mouth shut in class and actually tries to learn. the other two, tay and yejiun [okay.. i don't know how to spell either ones' names, so too bad, i'm going to spell them how i see fit =P actually, today i sat next to yejiun so i asked him how his name was spelt, and he was like "y, e, something-something-something-something..." lol i couldn't really catch it all at once and i couldn't be bothered asking him twice so i just smiled and nodded wisely.] hmm well that succesfully cut my sentence short and made me lose my place. hmm. oh yeah. tay and yejiun.. faaar out.. all they do is talk and talk and talk all through class in crazy asian. in cantonese to be exact. i could understand some of what they were saying, and at one point i butted in. they looked shocked that i could understand. LOL and of course their first reaction was to mutter amongst themselves in asian about it. yeah that's right, better be careful what you say around me punks! -__- and tay is one smartass motherf*cker.. he was mocking the teacher a fair bit, which almost made me wana smack him. but when it came time to practice reading kanji sentences out loud, i guess their lack of attention finally paid off cuz they were both struggling when it was their turn. it was just like that scene from billy madison.. "t-t-t-today, junior!" LOL cindy and i just sat there going .__. and hissing the answers at yejiun cuz he kept getting stuck. i mean don't get me wrong, they're nice guys, but i absolutely loathe people talking through lectures when you're trying to listen..
after uni i started walking back to the city with conway and beckie, i think her name is? i guess i was kinda rude and didn't introduce myself, even though we were talking and stuff -__- *mental note.. do so next week* somehow yejiun caught up with us, and we ended up going to the gaming place at the top of the myer centre cuz conway and beckie wanted to play DDR. didn't get to stay long though cuz i was supposed to meet jaclyn at 3.40 so i headed back to the bus stop with yejiun. on the way he was like "so will you be coming to the city or the valley anytime during the holidays?"
i was like .__. "err.. what, you think i'm guna spend everyday of the holidays at home??"
"well you said you wanted to study."
>__> study as in catch up on stuff, like japanese, moron! which is something you should be doing too!
i'm actually kinda surprised that his english is that good. like not being racist or anything.. but since he's an international student and all crazy asian [well not technically, but might as well be], i figured his english would be all fobby =P surprisingly it's not though. which is cool. i also noticed he has really nice teeth, for someone who smokes. LOL.
haha moving right along. just as i got to the bus stop i saw conway go pelting onto the 130; he was supposed to go to sunnybank to pick up his mom or something like that. he's a funny one =P
i picked up jaclyn from sonny's house and we went back to plaza and ate -__- lol
well anyway.. here's the uncanny part: yesterday when i ran into babyface he was like, "so.. have you seen shannon or denise lately?"
me: "nuh.. not since chinese school" [which i quit in grade 10.. yeeears ago =P]
and then.. who did i see today at plaza but shannon and denise themselves! O_O i contemplated saying hello but i saw shannon look straight at me without a hint of recognition on his face, so i thought better of it.. it would've been just plain awkward.. *sigh* i guess some things are just better to let go of...
hmm... that's not even half of what i wanted to blog about today.. =( *sigh* but i think i'm running out of time so i might cut this short. lol. yeah. abruptly. like this. =P
later days =]

Another useless day in the life of yenny...
~~>Tuesday 20.09.05<~~
today i attempted resume that "photo documentary" thing i was supposed to finish like two weeks ago. haha i think i did a fairly lousy job. [see the meagre results of today's photo taking here...] today i took about 3 photos, and pretty craptacular ones at that, so i've decided to combine them with the previous [failed] efforts that i've made at this whole thing. dang. >__>
i keep thinking of all the missed photo opportunities, which is quite like post-purchase remorse, you know, that feeling you get after you've just gone out and blown a sizeable paycheck, or your lifesavings, on something and you have that strange sensation of regret gnawing away at your stomach.
during lunch with maria and conway today [lol i think this is becoming a regular thing.. huzzah!! next time i hope we eat korean.. i think i'm developing a hankering addiction to kimchi 0_0] i finally met this dude, will, in person, that i'd "met" on the net hah. he went past our table so i stopped him and said hello.
twas an interesting meeting, i suppose. but regrettably a wasted photo opp. =(
after that i went to sunnybank to meet krystle [oh, and ran into babyface on the way back! lol there's ONE photo opp i didn't waste =P] and we finally went to regan's place to drop off some stuff we'd bought for her/her baby.
it was nice driving to her house, in a nostalgic kind of way.. i haven't been there since like high school, so it was sort of like a trip down memory lane.
i don't think her mom remembers who i am though. when we got there she was like "oh, it's regan's friend!" lol >__>
mmm.. i think my mood is suffering from my lack of energy atm. i had insomnia AGAIN last night, which drove me up the wall because i had to get up early today.
and also, on a completely unrelated note, the bus system at sunnybank plaza in the mornings really SUCKS! >=( this was the second week in a row i was late because the 130 that was supposed to come at 9.36 just somehow conveniently disappeared off the charts, and the next one didn't come until 10 to 10. and of course by then, they had the "SORRY, BUS FULL" sign up, because they'd had to accomodate all the people who would have been on the earlier bus. fucken oath it shits me off. how can the public transport system be so damn-diddly-amn unreliable?! i think the delay was only made worse by the fact that it's the school holidays at the moment, and the bus was full of little kids and parents who wouldn't usually have been there [but of course have every right to be there, it's just the damn BCC's fault for not scheduling their stupid transport system right!!]
argh i'm so screwed for the kanji test tomorrow.. *sigh* of course it's noone's fault but my own, since i'm the one who lets myself fall behind all the time -__- i sat next to benny again today, which probably isn't the wisest thing to do if you're already glum about your current progress with jap. benny is like the prodigy of the class. he knows all the answers to all my questions, and he is waaaay ahead with his kanji. not to mention his writing is unbearably neat!! and this is a guy we're talking about! it's almost disturbing.. =P
gargh i'm so buggered. i think i might retire early tonight -__- zZZzzZz

~~>Sunday 18.09.05<~~
LOL i was just looking at that hi5 website earlier, the craze that seems to be sweeping the world by storm, although God knows why o_O
yeah anyway.. i was just browsing through photos and shit.. LOL and it's fucken hilarious how a bunch of vain peoples' photos are all blurry and distorted [for reasons OTHER than lousy picture quality].. they think it'll make them look better or something if they blur the picture, or airbrush everything to the point where it's indistinguishable. like a distorted photo will prevent the world from seeing all their hideous features. hah. although i guess i shouldn't be complaining - maybe they're doing the world a favour by doing so, because if they're that freaking fake then who really wants to see them anyway!
well. wasn't that quite a bitchy start to today's blog.
i've been thinking lately.. [something that doesn't happen too often i suppose. oooh, she's making digs at herself.. the bitchiness continues! -__-]
do you believe in karma?
i think i do. but at the same time i have to kinda hope it's not real. because if what goes around, comes around, then all the lousy things i've done will surely come back and send me straight to hell.
i'll probably wind up in a prison cell or something, where Satan himself will influence me to commit more evils and i'll be hit even harder by karma returning for a second round.. -__- [hah oh well at least i'll be joined by Blair. if anyone's willing to go to hell, it's Plush Toy himself! *no insult intended, he just genuinely enjoys being satanic*]
hah. i guess i can only hope it doesn't come back threefold. 1:1 is plenty enough i think.. <__< or maybe i'm just talking crap again and confusing everything. back in the days when i used to practice witchcraft [yes. unbelieveable huh. i used to think i was a witch. someone lock me up and burn me on a stake -__-] i remember one of the golden laws in witchcraft is that everything comes back threefold. fear not though people, i've only ever "practised" white magic. [note the sarcastic " " marks.. because it's not really practising anything if none of your damn spells ever work!]
hmm. well.. let's just hope karma isn't as vengeful as i am.

~~>Friday 16.09.05<~~
yesterday on the way to the comp room i got stopped by these two asian guys who were asking for directions to some place that i figured was in Y block.. i was in such a good mood after my business law tute that i even walked them all the way there =D lol no not really, it was just a shitload easier to walk them there than give them wishy washy directions [because i suck at directing people, and they were already having enough trouble understanding my english anyway =P].
so going along with the spirit of being friendly, i introduced myself and asked them where they were from. when i discovered they were korean i literally had to restrain myself from lunging at them and declaring my undying love for shinhwa, and kangta, and fried pancakes from madtongsan... keke >=P
i think i kinda freaked them out a little cuz they'd started off making polite conversation then eventually went back to whispering between themselves in korean.. -__-"
haha yes, yes i'm quite sad =P i would love to meet more korean people right now, considering the only korean people i know are hannah from high school, [not that i really talked to her much], and those two korean chicks in my jap class that i haven't ever spoken to before, except to ask "are you okay?" after one of them tripped up the stairs -__- =P
hmm.. too bad the world isn't such a friendly place =(

Damn those stupid uni campaigners!!
~~>Wednesday 14.09.05<~~
argh what a dismal waste of time this week has been! i haven't done anything productive at all � there're assignments piling up left, right and centre which i haven't started on, i'm up to my ears in hideously confusing Japanese adjectives, and i feel so, so, sooo terribly sleep deprived.. T__T
today on the way into uni i got cornered by some weird asian guy who was campaigning for his party [the uni elections are on this week or something -__-"]. i think his name was michael, i didn't really catch it because he didn't speak loud enough. [and furthermore he shakes hands like a girl -__-] he's actually in my PR lecture too. which would probably explain a lot of things. *cough*
i was in a rush to get to my group meeting, but noo00oo0o.. he held me up for 10 minutes blabbing on and on about his stupid party, Go, and how they were newcomers, but they really thought they had a chance to win this year against Focus.
Initially he asked, "do you have time?"
Me: "Well, I've gotta get to the library for a group meeting."
Weird asian dude: "Oh. Where are you from?"
My brain: Dude.. leave me alone already!
Me: "I'm Malaysian."
Weird asian dude: "Oh, me too!"
My brain: Would you like a medal?
Weird asian dude: "I was thinking you look very familiar."
Me: "Yeah. I have a lecture with you in B Block."
My brain: You sat behind me last time and talked non-stop all the fucken way through!
Weird asian dude: "Oh okay. This will only take a minute. Where are you going now?"
Me: "I have a meeting in the library!"
Weird asian dude: "Oh okay, I'll just guide you to Y block. That's where the voting booth is." he then proceeded to start walking in the direction towards Y block, making sure I was still following him.
[Note that Y block and the library are nowhere near the same buildings, and Y block is totally out of place]
Me: "Um.. I KNOW where Y block is dude."
Weird asian dude: "Oh okay. So where have I seen you before?"
Me: "I'm in your lecture! On Mondays in B Block!"
Weird asian dude: "Oh.. I thought maybe I'd seen you at Klub Kandy. But I guess you're not into clubbing are you?"
My brain: What the fuck is that supposed to mean, punk?!
Me: "No. I don't like clubbing."
Weird asian dude: "Okay, I'll guide you to Y block. Along the way you may get stopped by our competitors......."
jeeeez.. damn asians! they just don't take hints!! gaaargh!! just for that, i'm voting Focus!! >=P
when I finally got to the library and explained my lame reason for being late, Gary in his fobby accent was like, "why you not say to him 'fuck off'!" LOL which cracked me up.. as he so often does =P and so my mood improved slightly.
i was so hungry by the time i got to jap class. i figured since i was early i could sit in the classroom and eat with no one else around, but i guess people like to turn up excrutiatingly early to class because simon, conway and cindy had already beat me there.. o_O
so i just sat there stuffing my face in front of everyone lol i'm such a pig! poor conway was starving too, but he didn't have any food, so he ran out and came back with one of those giant cookies from the vending machine. *drool* they're pretty good, them cookies!
so yeah. that was probably the best part. just sitting around before class started, talking with simon, conway and cindy. especially since i haven't really talked to simon since like week one, i'm surprised he even remembers my name lol.
i asked them if they planned to continue with jap next semester, but like the majority of people i've talked to about it, they said no.
i'm fully starting to feel that way too. jap is really overwhelming. there's so much to learn, it's daunting! i'm really screwed with the kanji right about now >=( writing the actual characters is okay [all those years of chinese school are finally paying off hehe =P], but it's tricky in the sense that every word has several pronounciations to it so it's hard reading it or writing it in the correct context.. grrr.. also, while i learnt a fair few characters at chinese school, i was learning characters from the new chinese system, but japanese requires characters from the old, complicated system - the same one that hong kong and taiwan use. -__-" it's just confusing..
apparently in japan to be considered literate, you have to know at least 2000 kanji. supposedly you can get by comfortably knowing 900 or so kanji but you wouldn't be able to read a newspaper or anything of the sort.
*sigh* yes. daunting. -__-
lol.. by the time class started, i was fenced in between cindy and clara. benny came in a bit later and took the seat on the other side of clara [there was nowhere else to sit, the room tends to fill up very fast] and they both just kinda sat there going.. hmm.. yeeeeaahh.. --> .__. lol =P
so i turned to them and said loudly, "SO... you're BOTH from singapore right..??" *nods head encouragingly*
and after that they were both like "oh! you're from singapore? me too!" and i think they hit it off reeeally well.. muahaha ^__~
and i guess that's my cue to exit! =P

~~>Tuesday 13.09.05<~~
i was forty minutes late to jap today >=( i'm kind of annoyed at myself for being late, especially as japanese is the one class that i actually make an attempt not to skip -__-
hmm. while i was waiting at the bus stop, shanny's friend, matt, was there and we started talking. while we were sitting there these asians drove past, and of course being asian, they stopped right in the middle of the road so they could drop off one of their passengers at the bus stop. the driver right behind start blasting them with their horn [and rightly so! =P] for holding everyone up. haha and matt was like "damn asians!!"
LOL. hmm okay i guess that isn't so funny. but it's reassuring knowing there's other asians out there that think the same way i do =P
when i finally got to class i sat next to gary who, incidentally, had his nails painted a puuurdy glittery pink, by his girlfriend, or so he claimed.. keke =P. we had a nice little bitch up about a certain.. *cough* group member.. hahaha it's fkn hilarious listening to gary swearing when he's angry! lol cuz sometimes his choice of words doesn't really come out right, and combined with his fobby accent.. it cracks me up =P haha but yeah.. he's good person =]
had lunch again with maria and conway, lol this time we wound up at maccas cuz maria had a craving for them cajun mcnuggets [which by the way are actually quite spicy surprisingly =S]. i guess i kinda went nuts and started inviting anyone and everyone that i passed on the way out of the lab to come along to lunch, maybe cuz i was in such a good mood? lol not that anyone else came along anyway -__-
went back to sunnybank after lunch and bummed around with conway for a bit. conway is kind of intriguing in that he doesn't seem to talk much, but once he does get started he can talk and talk and taaaalk.. which is cool, cuz he's full of bizarre little pieces of information haha.
after that i killed more time at sunnybank with jaclyn, and i helped her to select an mp3 player =D w00t! *feels somewhat useful*
she eventually bought this cute little samsung player, which i thought was a really good deal actually. and me being the greedy sod i am, i instantly wanted one too, so i decided i'd go back and get one next week. heh -__-" but now that i've thought about it for a while i think it's probably better if i don't. i'm not exactly the richest person in the world at the moment, and plus it doesn't always pay to act on impulse. [i've learned this because i am the queen of spontaneity.. -__-]
hmmm.. i'm so hungry.. i think i might go make myself a sandwich or something.. *drooool*
later days! ^__^

~~>Sunday 11.09.05<~~
there's some stuff that's been on my mind for a while now. it's sucky, because i can't seem to wipe it out of my head.
and my infatuation with some people of late.. i wish it would end!
they're barely acquaintances, but i want to know more, i want to know all about them, their lives, the things they do, how they live, what makes them tick..... is that normal? =3
i haven't been getting proper sleep lately. sounds horribly neurotic, i know, but it annoys me >=( all last week i couldn't get to sleep till about 1 or 2am, even though i was tired AS and would go to bed at about 10 or 11. i'd end up just lying there for hours, staring at the ceiling and hating whatever invisible force it was that was keeping me awake. 1 or 2am probably isn't a big deal for some people, but it is for me if i have class the next day because i'm one of those sleep dyslexic people that need like 10 hours sleep a night. hmm. guess i should see someone about that and get it fixed -__-"
maybe it's my conscience. maybe it's keeping me awake as a sort of punishment for the lousy things i've done. argh i dunno.
well. at least it's sunday afternoon now. i never thought i'd say this, but i'm kinda glad the weekend is over... o_O *shock* keke. cuz it means i'm one day closer to tuesday and wednesday... yeah, yeah. i'm way too hung on japanese for my own good. -__-
on friday i finally went to a japsoc [one of UQ's numerous student clubs that surely puts QUT's clubs to shame.. =P] event - the sushi-making day! ^__^ i've been dying to go all year.. i dragged jimmy along, and i guess it was fun. probably not as fun as i'd thought it would be. i dunno.. something about UQ people.. [not all of them of course!] but i get the feeling the things people say about UQ being bigger and snobbier might be kinda true?
of course to every rule there's an exception =P and i did meet some nice people, and also some of jimmy's state high friends that go to UQ who were really nice too.
well... time to get a move on with my PR tute exercise for tm.. gargh i hate PR >__<
"later days" people...

w0000t =D
~~>Tuesday 06.09.05<~~
wow.. what the odds of this.. another fantastic day in a row! *sigh* my endorphin levels are at an all-time HIGH kekeke >=D
had that japanese oral assessment today.. twas quite nerve wracking, and to be honest i could've done better.. i guess lack of memorisation and nerves got the best of me once again -__- i ended up mostly just looking down at the list of cues on the desk, when really i would've liked to have been looking everyone in the eye. but still.. i'm hoping i did okay.. and it was really cool hearing peoples in class introducing themselves =]
today started off a little shoddily, like for starters the bus came dang late and, silly me, i decided to get off at mater hill and walk across the goodwill bridge because i figured it'd be faster. as if i wasn't already late enough, [and of all days, the day when we had assessment!] it turned out the goodwill bridge was CLOSED.. i was like "aaarrrghhh nooo000o0oo0o!!" and my entire life flashed before my eyes in sea of ravaging black and white images... hahaha no i'm exaggerating lol =P but yeah.. i started to freak out and probably would've started hyperventilating [lol.. no.. another exaggeration.. i tend to do that when i'm in a good mood huh! =P] if one of the people also stranded nearby hadn't turned out to be this guy, benny, from my jap class. turns out i'd sat next to him yesterday lol, although i hadn't really said a word to him previously =P lol and call it selfish if you will, but i guess it was kinda comforting not being the only one late to class with a crummy excuse like "the bus came late." or "the bridge was conveniently closed." =P
oh and FINALLY i talked to the two crazy asians whom i've been saying hello to for the last six weeks but don't actually know haha. they seem really nice, especially for crazy asian people. well.. maybe because they're not technically crazy asian, cuz it turns out they're both malaysian. which is awesome! i had no idea there were so many malaysian/singaporean people in my class =D
one dude is from kuala lumpur.. my mom's hometown =D and i was stoked to find out the other guy is from perak, or more specifically, ipoh.. because ipoh is really close to my dad's hometown of taiping. hehe it's mad! cuz for once someone actually knows where i'm talking about when i say it =]
oh and i managed to meet someone again in the toilets LOL. this kawaaaiiii taiwanese chick with a really pretty name, although i have no idea how to spell it so i'm not even guna try. hahaha it seems the toilets are a great place for meeting people.. *rubs beard* LOL =P
well.. that's been my endorphin fix for the week. i guess i wouldn't be surprised if tomorrow proved to put a bitter end to this good feeling, but i really hope it continues... =]

~~>Monday 05.09.05<~~
so... today was an AWESOME freaking day! =D there's nothing quite like a dose of japanese to cure what ails ya ^__~
we didn't plan it, but after class, we - maria, myself and these two dudes from our class, conway and agga [hahaha i have a sinking feeling i spelt that horribly wrong] - ended up going for lunch. ooohh.. the spontaneity of it all, i love it.. kekeke =P
we ate at this nice little jap restaurant in the elizabeth street arcade [haha NO, not the one with all the dodgy insects]. it was really nice to just sit down with some people and get to know them better. and as an added bonus, over FOOD =P
previously i'd kinda thought conway was a real snob, cuz he's in both my tuesday and wednesday classes, but never bothered to make eye contact even though i'd talked to him once before. and it's not like it's that hard.. i mean hell.. there's two crazy asian dudes i've been saying hello to for the last six weeks but don't really know their names or anything haha. i even remember saying to maria "what a fkn snob!" but i guess you just need to get to know people a little better before they really open up? maybe? i dunno. haha -__-
on the way back to the bus stop i ran into sna too =] twas a nice surprise and good catching up with him ^__^
haha oh yeah.. after that i desperately needed to pee so i headed to the myer centre toilets. as i was washing up, this asian chick was trying to dry her hands but the dryer didn't seem to be working. i started to point her to another one on my left but at the last minute it suddenly kicked in so i ended up just smiling at her. i guess she must've seen my textbook that i'd put down on the counter while washing my hands cuz she suddenly said, "oh! are you japanese? i'm japanese! ^__^"
lol then her friend came out of the cubicle and they both stood around admiring my book and going "ohh.. yookoso.. welcome!" LOL ^__^
i'm kicking myself now for not asking for their msn or contacts or something, cuz they seemed really nice, and i would love a language partner right about now.. one chick was called sachiko and the other one eiri i think? o_O they go to griffith uni, nathan. hopefully one day.. maybe.. i'll run into them again.. =]
also bummed around with krystle for a bit at sunnybank. lol. i think we're getting to be bad influences on each other when it comes to doing unlawful things. *cough* haha. hmm. -__-
oh! and i caught up with togi today finally.. i feel sad that she's gone for a whole year again, and i didn't get to see her one last time before she left =( but this scholarship thing that took her away is a fantastic opportunity for her.. so i'm really glad for her! ^__^ but still.. *miss you lots sis! T__T*
hmm.. yeah.. i'm also feeling quite good now because.. well.. there are some things i've seen that a week or so ago would've made me quite angry and reduced me to feeling like shit.
but surprisingly i'm not angry. not at all! in fact, seeing them actually made me smile. sounds whack huh?? =P i guess the fact that i'm not getting worked up about these things is a sign that i've finally moved on.. and that's something that makes me happy.. it makes me feel a better person for not being so petty as to let these things get under my skin. especially things that simply do not matter. =]
yeeeaaah... i like this feeling alot.. =]

the yo-yo effect...
~~>Friday 02.09.05<~~ ..happy birthday to jenny =]..
so.. it seems i'm suffering from a severe case of the yo-yo effect again. my mood and happiness goes up and down like a yo-yo.. this time it's a bout of rapid downswing again.. -__-
today i finally handed my mouse over to carlos.. and i guess that's what triggered the start of the lousy feelings. to begin with, i didn't get to say a proper goodbye to her [yes, yes, i am fully aware of how tacky that must've sounded], which made me feel horrible because i've become quite attached to her, even though she probably didn't reciprocate my feelings -__- when i got there with krystle, carlos took the box off me [i'd decided to let her remain in her big storage crate thing, but had taken out the water and food so it didn't spill on the drive over], put it inside and that was that. i didn't get to see her new home she'd be living in, or her new friends she'd be living with, and worst of all, i didn't get to make sure that she was put safely into her new home.. ordinarily i wouldn't mind, but this is my mouse we're talking about. no one knows as well as i do her inability to be handled by humans, and how cable she is of escaping when the lid is opened on her box...
so yeah.. all day i've had this horrible, sinking kind of feeling. i'm just worried. i'm worried they may have left her in the box, thinking it wasn't necessary to take her out immediately, without realising there wasn't any food, and more importantly, water [because it was really hot today and on the way over the temperature inside her box would've heated up significantly]... i'm worried that they won't have been able to get her into the new cage, and she'll have jumped out of their hands and escaped outside, only to meet the likes of the three cats next door.. =(
*sigh* so many worries...
and i miss her already. even though she makes a racket on her wheel, and stinks up my room with mouse smell, i miss her terribly =( i wish i hadn't gotten so damn attached!
byebye, tenten... =(

thank GOD tomorrow is tuesday!!
~~>Monday 29.08.05<~~
w00h00! haHA i think it's safe to say my mood has improved significantly in the last 24 hours.. w000o0o00t! =]
just finished my exam =D well a while ago actually. it took like 10 minutes -__- i wish i hadn't stressed so much. lol and i hope i'm not jinxing myself by saying it, but damn.. it was PISS! they gave us 10 minutes perusal which pretty much in itself was enough time to answer the questions.. this chick finished like after 8 minutes after the official start.. that's right.. 8 minutes!! sugoy desu ne!! ^__^
i'm hoping i did half alright. i just checked my results for the business law and ethics exam and i'm kinda disappointed.. but oh well. i'm in too good a mood right now to care.
i caught my mouse last night, which i guess has contributed to my current good mood. but carlos hasn't replied to my msgs yet so yeah.. guess i'll be holding onto her for a little longer.
i'm so glad this stress crap is over.. and better yet.. tomorrow is TUESDAY!! w00t!! *sigh* i live for tuesdays and wednesdays.. spend all week hanging out for them, waiting impatiently, twiddling my thumbs in anticipation.. and then tuesday and wednesday come and go so quickly..
*sigh* i think i'm enjoying japanese for all the wrong reasons -__-" i love my teacher, classes, all the mad peoples in them.. but yeah.. if i take jap again next sem, unless i got like the same people in my classes to make them that enjoyable i think i'd probably hate the subject -__-
i think i'm guna head back to the city now. a little early, yes, but i'm going to indulge in greasy, salty kfc chips.. *drool* ohhhh yeeeaaarrrhhh...
later days =]

~~>Sunday 28.08.05<~~
hmm.. i thought the grudging feelings would've passed by now, but clearly they haven't. i'm angry over quite a few things, and i suspect that's the reason why the weekend has been so shitty.
i have an exam for services marketing tomorrow, for which i have attempted to study, but once again failed miserably. i'm finding it extremely hard to concentrate, and quite often i find myself churning over all the things that are making me angry, instead of studying.
i'm angry at my mouse [yes, i'm angry at her. angry at her GOOD >=(] for running away all the time and refusing to be caught.
yesterday carlos provided a solution to my mouse problem by offering to take my mouse in =] his sister already has two of them, so i'm sure she'll make an excellent caretaker.. but unfortunately i can't hand my mouse over to them until she's actually been caught. which irritates me to no end, because i'm worried about her, about what she's doing and where she is, and so on. this agitation, i think, has caused a great deal of restlessness on my part. i wish it would just END! the sooner i give her to carlos, the better.. everyone will be better off.
i'm angry at myself too for the lousy job i've done with studying over the weekend. i've had sufficient time to prepare for this exam, but no. like the dumbass i am, i left it all to the last minute and as a result there's this constant pressure, this feeling of time running out, of impending doom, that's been lingering over my head like a nasty storm cloud. i wish it would go away.
so.. bottom line? i haven't studied enough, and i know i'm going to do quite shittily on the exam tomorrow. you can tell too, since i'm here typing up my blog like an idiot instead of spending more time revising. even though i KNOW i need to study some more, i can't seem to bring myself to do it. the motivation is just not there.
i guess in the back of my mind i've already kinda moved on.. my brain has probably already prepared itself to let this one slide, and promised itself that it'll work uber hard on the next assessment to compensate.. and just as long as everything that's making me angry goes away, things will work out just fine in the end. that's the way the theory goes anyway.
i'm also angry at people. yes. people. people that i (and several others too) have told myself aren't worth the time of day anymore. i should damn well get over it already. but i can't seem to. my brain, yes the same lazy brain that refuses to study any further for tomorrow, is telling me that it demands vengeance. i want desperately to wreak revenge on them, but can't. i want them to understand how lousy they've made me feel, what it feels like to be in my position. but i can't. i guess because i don't know how to, and also because my pride refuses to let me have anything to do with them, and so i can't go about trying to resolve the issue like a mature person would.
*sigh*
hopefully all this crap will go away soon. cuz after tomorrow's exam there'll still be a flurry of tests and assignments due.. i really don't need this shit right now. -__-

I hate the world today...
~~>Friday 26.08.05<~~
famous lyrics by meredith brooks.. remember that song? 'bitch' - 1997. that one line sums up exactly how i feel right now.
i was having such a fantastic week but now it's all gone down the plughole. i hate it.
my mouse escaped again today. just a couple of hours ago actually. i'd managed to catch her last saturday night, and put her into the new home i'd bought for her. *sigh* it's so damn frustrating! i'd left the lid on her box and all, with enough space for air to come in. admittedly i left it open a little wider than usual, i didn't think she would jump. i thought she was getting used to living in her own little home now, but i guess not. when i came back an hour later, she was gone. and stupidly i'd left the door to my room wiiiide open, because i hadn't thought there was any need for it to be closed, seeing as i didn't think she would try to escape.
stupid, stupid, stupid me. honto baka desu. -__-
so now i don't know where she is. she could be anywhere in the house and i'm worried sick about her. if i catch her again, i think i'll have to give her away.. *sigh* T__T
...
yesterday was a crock of shit too. well, some parts anyway.
yesterday evening i discovered that the past is really not worth holding on to. i might like to think it is, and in the past i certainly thought it was.. but now i can see that i'm wrong.
there's another song that kind of sums up how i feel right now, well, this one line of it anyway:
"it's time to cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in..."
sadly, i can't remember the name of the song, or the artist. but at least i've woken up to it now. it's time for me to cut ties with the past, with everything that seemed so right back then, but has turned out to be nothing but a crock of shit and lies.
i want nothing to do with any of them anymore. i don't want anything to do with them, their little stooge girlfriends, or anyone even remotely connected to their circle. well.. maybe with the exception of one person. that person, and that person ONLY.
you just never know who you can trust. it's sad, isn't it? trust isn't something that you can just freely give away, and it certainly doesn't grow on trees. it doesn't exist in abundance. why? because it's sacred. trust is only worth giving if it's given to those who deserve it. if only i'd known that earlier. well.. i guess i can't say that i didn't. because i did know it. and to think that i'm so stupid as to let my guard down, time after time. yeah. not just once, but time and again. unbelievable. i'm naive as anything. my stupidity drives me to hate myself.
real friends are few and far between. but thank God for the ones i do have.
i would've been in a very unhealthy state yesterday if krystle hadn't been with me. if she hadn't been there.. well. yeah.
it's always nice to know who your real friends are, isn't it...

~~>Thursday 25.08.05<~~
w00t!! here i am still at uni like a hobo.. well at least i managed to pull together a rough draft for that case study due next week.. i guess that's somewhat productive, so it's okay if i take a break for now lol -__-"
earlier today shanny and i crashed another gathering for international students muahahaha >=) this is getting to be a habit =P we noticed a bunch of asians standing around outside X block so we went in to see what all the fuss was about. turns out today is International Student Fair Day or something o_O
when we got inside we were greeted by freebies, and even better, chocolate cake!! *drool* upon seeing an indian guy and an asian girl walk in, the people there practically shoved the cake upon us.. and hey.. who are we to complain? =P "oh alright, don't mind if i do!"
hmm.. i really wanted to donate blood today.. the red cross van is outside our uni again =D i saw it on tuesday on the way to the computer lab but we didn't have time to stop. this time i actually got close enough to see what it's like ^__^ but unfortunately i couldn't qualify because it turns out the minimum donor weight is 45 kilos.. unbelievable huh.. discrimination!!! >=( -__- lol. on tuesday i discovered that maria was a regular donor. she's donated 6 times already i think.. mad huh. one day i'll be able to do it.. ONE day!! =P
this has been a fantastic week at uni.. but time is flying so damn fast =( it's already week 6, which means we're already half way through the dang semester.. T__T nooo00o0o.. i love the holidays, like any normal person does =P, but i don't want this semester to end.. it's been the best semester yet.. =(
i'm loving Japanese as much as ever kekeke >=) the more i learn about the teacher and the people in my classes, the more it becomes enjoyable.. it's mad!
yesterday i learnt that our teacher's husband is actually Dutch (our teacher is fully Japanese) and she has a little two year old daughter.. oooh kawaii desu ne!! ^__^ *beams* it's really cool seeing different ethinic combinations i reckon. hehe like monkey son here, who's half greek, half indonesian. and sela, who's half aussie, half fijian, and his korean girlfriend... =]
and yesterday one of the chicks i met in my jap class was really cool.. she seems unbelieveably nice! her name is jolly.. it's such a cute name ay, i think it really suits her. she was actually in my accounting tute last sem, and cuz i'd never talked to her before i didn't think she'd remember me, but she did =D
i was sitting with this chick called clara, and neither of us had a textbook. after about 10 minutes jolly realised and she was like, "oh! you wana share my book?" then she proceeded to apologise for not having noticed earlier that we didn't have a book to look at.. incredibly nice huh! *sigh*
uh oh i just realised the time. i'd better start heading to the bus stop. will continue this blog later!! =]

~~>Thursday 18.08.05<~~
and so the world is falling back into its usual swing again...
i'm in a shithouse mood atm, but then again i suppose i nearly always am. i'm not sure why though. i just came out of my ethics lecture, which i thoroughly enjoyed.. and this morning for the first time i walked across the goodwill bridge to get to uni, rather than the usual mundane city way.. the walk put me in a good mood. cuz yeah.. it was faster than taking the city route [emroze was right after all.. huzzah!], and the view is really nice [yes, ben skeggs was right too.. huzzah!]. but now i'm in a bad mood. i feel like smashing something into someone. gaaaargh!!!! >=(
i still haven't caught my mouse yet -__- i set up the trap, which consisted of this box with a trap door.. when the mouse goes in the trap door snaps shut, thus trapping her but in a nice, humane way.. and hey what do you know, it actually did work on the first go. it caught her, but then she jumped. she jumped and took out the lid of the box, and so she escaped.
so i've come to the conclusion that my mouse really is superman. not only does she run like the wind, but she can jump, and quite strongly too. -__- i feel quite discouraged about the whole issue - even if i do catch her eventually i'm not sure what i'll do with her.. i feel like she'll be so used to living on her own in the wardrobe that she won't want to live in a box next to my bed and be tamed, and hand trained, and she won't even want to be my friend =( *sigh*
went to denise's iceskating thing yesterday. 'twas quite fun, although we ended up leaving early.. which is something i've never actually done before. i guess 4 hours of it is just too much to bear these days. in the past i would've relished it though.. =(
i'd better get to my tute. maybe later when i'm in a slightly healthier mood i'll come back and blog some more. =3

~~>Sunday 14.08.05<~~
mm. okay so i guess things aren't looking so bad after all.. my mouse is still alive!! =D last night and the night before i left out some food and water, and each morning the food was gone.. which proves she's still alive!! huzzah!! i feel so relieved.. ^__^ unless cockroaches have a taste for cheese, barley and unshelled sunflower seeds =P in which case my theory would then be flushed down the drain.. =S hmm..
heh.. i can't believe it's come to this but i'm guna have to resort to using a mouse trap to catch her... *dum dum duuuummmmmm...*
muahahaha if that shocked you into thinking i'm heartless when it comes to pest control then sorry =P
i meant a humane live mouse trap of course! =P i've been looking at some designs on the net and hopefully the one i use will WORK..
initially i was happy to just let her wander around my room [fear not, i've blocked off all exits so she can't get out], and that worked fine because hey.. out of sight, out of mind right? and i'd leave her food and fresh water every night before i go to sleep.. but now i'm worried she'll start chewing away at the electrical cords and wires and stuff, and OMG my cable, my preeeciouuus cable!! >__< *bubble wraps internet cable* hehe
i'm actually feeling quite happy now, i guess i'm letting my hopes ride too much on this mouse trap thing.. better not get my hopes up, cuz we all know what happens when you get your hopes up... you're in for a biiiiig disappointment.. so yeah.. guess i'd better not say anything more until i've actually managed to catch her.. assuming that i actually can.. =S *sigh*
anyways.. moving right along.. i tried to study for business law and ethics today. it's high time i got a move on, seeing as the exam is next saturday =S i sat down and opened up the first page, and my GOD it was boring.. boring like you wouldn't believe! i guess that's just my own personal opinion, frankly i care not for the westminster system, constitutions, delegations, her majesty the queen ruling over all, and whatnot.. i think i'd really enjoy studying criminal law, or something with a little more substance, but i suppose to get to that level you'd have to start off with all basic stuff huh -__-
i love my ethics lecturer though! her first lecture was on thursday. it's such a shame we only spend a couple of weeks on ethics in this unit cuz quite frankly it's a hell of a lot more interesting than the law side.. she's really passionate about the topics she speaks on, it's fascinating listening to her talk. but then again, maybe i'm just biased since i KNOW that i don't enjoy the law side at all. on thursday when she was talking about unethical behaviour, she delved a little into psychology, trying to explain why people behave the way they do. stuff like psychopaths, split personalities and the like. it was fascinating! times like that make me wish i'd opted to study psychology like i'd originally wanted, instead of business -__-"
haha okay, this is the third time i've used the word 'fascinating', but right now my lack of brain power is forcing me to be repetitive with adjectives.. yeah anyway.. i find my ethics lecturer just fascinating. her name is xanthe.. even her name is charismatic. she's not the kind of person who's charismatic in the typical well-dressed, charming sort of way.. in fact she's rather quite a geek.. LOL oh man that musn't have sounded good =P the way she dresses isn't going to get her on the world's best-dressed list anytime soon, but that's what's so appealing about her! instead of fussing over the superficial things, like her hair, or make-up, or clothing, all those trivial little things, she's out there focussing on the worldly issues, like morals, ethics, you know.. the things that society REALLY needs.
lol i think i said this to shanny the other day, but i bet if she weren't a lecturer at uni, she'd probably be an advocate for something like greenpeace, wspca, or falun gong. some good cause where the pay is low or non-existant, but the satisfaction derived from changing someone's life is extremely high..
haha maybe if she were our age, she'd be one of those anti-VSU protesters.. ohhh yeahh.. i can see it now.. =]

The worst caretaker in the world...
~~>Friday 12.08.05<~~
hmm well after looking at sheannal's photos from last night's bbq i feel slightly better.. but still kind of awful.. why? well before i explain that, it's time to announce the winner of the award for the Worst Caretaker in the World.. and once again, for the third time in a row, the award goes to yenny!! that's right, yenny herself!
naaargh so what did i do this time? *sigh* let's start from the beginning..
today i went to the pet shop with krystle. i'd woken up with the idea that owning a mouse would be incredibly awesome, and so i went to buy one. i began to have second thoughts, but after mulling over the decision for a good couple of hours i eventually decided, HEY, let's go for it.. needless to say, that was a baaad idea.
i bought the equipment and the mouse, a little black female, and headed home with krystle, who wanted to help set it all up. everything was going fine-diddly-ine until it was time to put the mouse in its new home...
getting the darn thing out of the cardboard box was hard enough cuz it kept scrabbling around. i'd seen the guy at the shop pick it up by its tail, and i tried that, but she dug in her claws and i was scared of hurting the little thing so i gave up that idea =( eventually i got the mouse in my hand but of course the worst thing that could happen DID happen... the mouse squeezed out of my grasp and began to run around my room.
faaarken oath.. krystle and i spent a good half an hour trying to catch it but it kept eluding us and running to the darkest corners. of course you can't blame the mouse for being scared, but fuuuuck.. we tried to scare it out from under the bed, but that didn't work. not even trying to lure it with food worked.. >__<
at one point, it came out and was under the computer table but there was nothing i could do =( if i made any movement towards it, it would turn tail and run.. so i just crouched there on the ground staring at her, and she stared at me.. then she turned and ran towards the wall with the built-in wardrobe, and vanished.. i have the worst feeling that's she crawled under the door and into the wardrobe, which is the worst thing she could possibly have done.. she'll never find her way back out of that wardrobe because it's so crammed full of my mom's junk.. i'm not kidding hey.. everything that my mom buys when she goes on one of her lunatic sprees ends up in that closet.. it's just all piled onto the floor, bag after bag on top of each other.. right now the height of the pile is about up to my elbows.. it's just fkn insane..
but yeah.. by this time i had to drive krystle home, so i blocked off the gap under the door to my room so it couldn't escape from the room. when i came back, there was no sign of the mouse..
so.. bottom line? the mouse is still somewhere in my room. there's no way it could've gotten out, but i have NO idea where it is, whether it's in the wardrobe, or quivering somewhere under the furniture.. i can't take the stuff out of the wardrobe cuz there's just too much of it and it'd clutter all the available floor space.. if the mouse suddenly did appear and started running, it'd be hell trying to catch her amongst all the bags and boxes of junk.. i just don't want her to starve.. because ultimately that's what's guna happen if i don't find her..
i put out a little dish of food and a dish of water for her, just in case she's hungry and can find her way to it.
i'm totally happy for her to romp around my room, and i'll just leave food and water around for her.. she doesn't even have to come out when i'm in the room!! i just don't want her to starve!! >__<

Finally.. something goes right on a Monday, for a change!
~~>Monday 08.08.05<~~
Y: I wish he'd come back already, I miss him.
C: Yeah. It's weird. He left before Christmas, he's been gone for so long, I don't even know when he's coming back.
Y: He was supposed to come back in January. That was seven months ago...
C: What?! Sh*t, I'm getting worried now...

18 hours later...

C: You know how we were just talking about him yesterday? ... He's back!!
Y: No way...

sound like a corny soap opera? mm i guess it does.. but i'm too happy to care.. cuz Don is back!! =D *massive grin*
after seven freaking months.. =( missed him like crazy. now i'm really looking forward to meeting his fiance/wife.. not sure which is it, cuz i don't even know if they're married yet or not.. shiiit i don't even know what's going on.. but sadly, won't get to see him for a while cuz tomorrow he's off to adelaide apparently =( *sigh*
but still.. it was good news while it lasted =] i can't believe something good has happened on a monday.. =]
lol but WAIT, there's MORE! [more good news, i mean =P]
the tute presentation went off without a hitch >=) muahahaha better yet, it turns out we're all individually marked, which is a fantastic piece of news that i wish i'd known about earlier so i would've stressed less about my group members' lack of ability to speak english =P
i'm pretty happy with how it went though, most people in the tute were really good sports and participated =] and i think gary and rebecca did pretty well too, so fingers crossed we all get optimum marks =D
and now to focus all energy on the jap writing test on wednesday.. i hope i'm not getting cocky but it should be okaaaay.. hopefully.. lol. the teacher emailed us the other day saying the test would only go for about 15 minutes [out of a two hour class], so the proportion of test-lession is giving me a sliver of hope.. hopefully not false hope though.. =}
anyways.. better get to my next class.. services marketing lecture at 6pm. apparently this week we have a guest speaker so hopefully the lecture isn't going to be 2 hours of monotonous crap like it usually is.. =D
later days, sons!

I can predict the future...
~~>Sunday 07.08.05<~~
hmm well not really, i guess i'm just prone to unlucky coincidences. =P
yesterday i took my mom's car to go to sunnybank with krystle, on the way there i told her i had a feeling the car was going to break down. for the last few days there'd just been something wrong with it when trying to start it up. it felt really scratchy and strained...
krystle: "you mean it could break down right now?? when we're driving?? what do you do when you break down?? who do you call??"
haha i didn't want to scare her anymore, so i said, "don't worry dude, not like RIGHT now.. but sometime soon.. maybe a month or so. i just don't think it's guna last."
how true. although it happened alot sooner than i expected, so there goes my theory about my being a psychic =P
today after church the car just wouldn't start. simple as that. it didn't even sputter anymore, it just sat there silently refusing to respond. my mom ended up having to call the RACQ to come to the parking lot, and finally the mechanic decided it was the starter motor that was causing the problem. since the car refused to start at all, it had to be towed.. what an experience.. -__-
hah and now to begin my usual griping. yeah.. my mom forces me to go to church every week, it's something she's done since i was in third grade. i'm definitely not a christian, and it's pretty damn sad that she can't see that. she just forces her beliefs onto me and i have no choice but to attend. the one time (just recently) when i tried to approach her about not wanting to attend church anymore, she just totally brushed me off. it made me so angry. the whole issue still makes me seethe with rage when i think about it. part of the reason is because i hate christianity. right now, i can't ever see myself having respect for that religion. i guess i sound horrible, like some kind of terrorist.. but it's just so full of shit. the way i see it, the majority of christians are a bunch of humbugs and hypocrites. [note there that i said MAJORITY, not ALL, so if you're guna get all fired up, make sure it's for the right reason and not because you think can you accuse me of generalising..] how can people preach things like "love thy neighbour," yet go out and discriminate against single mothers and homosexuals?? if that's not hypocritical, then tell me what is..
i guess there's no point ranting anymore, the point i really wanted to make was.. while we were stuck there in the parking lot with the RACQ van flashing beside our car, my mom's friend [so-called fucken friend] came to get into her car and was like "aw, what happened? ... did you leave your headlights on?" she said that as she got into her car and then just drove away. didn't even say goodbye. she was asian, of course.
i'm like.. riiight...
a few minutes later, an aussie lady came to her car. she obviously realised we were having problems, and she was nice enough to ask, "are you guys guna be alright?"
so there you go.. classic example of how not ALL christians are truly nice people. some, like that aussie lady, are considerate.. and some are just full of shit. no need to point out who i'm referring to there.
there was one other thing that really shit me off today as well. when we came to the church parking lot, we saw a 4WD that had double-parked. luckily, the spaces there are relatively wide so i figured rather than be inconsiderate and double-park over the next spot, i'd squeeze a little closer to the 4WD so someone else could park next to us. guess who the driver of the 4WD turned out to be? yeap, that inconsiderate "friend" of my mom's. trust an asian person to double-park -__-. it made me angry, and impulsively i muttered, "maybe you should tell your 'FRIEND' not to park over two spaces."
straight away my mom whipped around and snapped, "why don't YOU tell her that? don't mind other peoples' business! you're getting to be very bitchy and bossy."
pffft.. right. well at least i'm not afraid to admit that i'm a bitch, unlike SOME people. at least i can actually admit it. and unlike SOME people, i don't have a tendency to think that i'm God's gift to the world, that i'm just the salt of the earth.
my mom's hyprocrisy just really gets to me sometimes. cuz she's a really nasty piece of work, if you ever did meet one. she makes friends just to use them, because she wants something off them, and she has no qualms about poisoning other peoples' minds with her tactless comments and bitchings about my dad and any other person unfortunate enough to land themselves in her bad books.
of course, what is an accusation or a statement like that without any evidence to back it up? well.. in the parking lot later that morning as we waited for the RACQ to arrive, my mom bitched the whole time about my dad, and the people at her work; how "nasty" she thought they were, and how they were "stupid" just because they do things in a way that she doesn't approve of, and how "stupid" my dad is.
still not convinced? need more evidence?
when we finally got home, my mom started to cook lunch. my dad came into the kitchen to tell her he didn't want too much for lunch, to which my mom replied in a nasty voice, "i'm cooking this for yen, not for you."
how do you respond when someone says something like that to you?? the only thing to do is mumble something like, "oh.. okay.. well.. i won't have any then." and pretend like you're not hurt. i saw my dad go outside and sit by himself, and i felt awful. i certainly hadn't asked my mom to cook food for me, and me only!
so i asked her, "aren't you cooking any for him?"
"no. he doesn't want any."
...
then what did she do two minutes later? sit down at the table next to me with a bowl for herself, while my dad sat by himself outside.
..the HEIGHT of petty nastiness...
so there you go.. there's part one of my dysfunctional family down in writing. maybe i'll tackle part two tomorrow. -__-

~~>Tuesday 02.08.05<~~
.... i'm back.. this half-decent day has turned out to be rather craptacular =(
gai-sensei is gone T__T when i checked on him this morning, he was alright.. well, not 'alright' as in super-dooper fine, but he was alive at least.. but i guess sometime during the day while i was at uni he passed away. T__T
i guess it was only to be expected.. he hadn't eaten anything in the last two days, no matter how much i pushed the food down in front of him. *sigh* my dad says at least he's not suffering anymore.. cuz he'd been sick for a while.. r.i.p. gai-sensei..
at least my other fish are alright.. for now anyway. the two in the main tank are starting to show signs of the same condition gai-sensei and all the previous fish had. i don't know what to do!! >__< it starts off with them occassionally sinking to the bottom of the tank and resting on the gravel for a few seconds at time, then it becomes more frequent, and for longer and longer.. then their scales start to puff and flare out, giving them this horrible bloated kind of look.. eventually they stop swimming altogether and just lie on the gravel at the bottom, ocassionally struggling up for food. it's like some invisible parasite manifests itself in their bodies and lies dormant, waiting for the exact right time to spring up, and then completely zapps them of their energy and will to live.. when they stop eating then you know it's pretty much the end.. =( aaarggh i just don't know how to fix it! i've tried fungus treatment AND doses of broad spectrum but clearly nothing has worked if they're still showing signs of it.
i'm hoping sharingan-kakashi is okay.. i separated him from everyone else and put him in his own little tank a while ago because he started to show signs of fungus growth. so hopefully sharingan-kakashi hasn't contracted whatever it is that everyone else has, since he's been in his own little tank.
shit, i must be like the worst carer in the world. all my fish have problems T__T
i think i might go lie down.

Kudos to me...
~~>Tuesday 02.08.05<~~ w00t!! it's my anniversary ^__~ *love you lots hunni*
yes, that's right. kudos to me [if that's even the right spelling..] for teaming up with a bunch of fobby asians for my marketing assignment. w00t. there go my marks down the drain.. -__-"
yesterday in services marketing, we had to team up into groups of 3 for an assignment. it didn't seem so bad at the time, but i ended up in a group with 2 other asians, both of them international students. [yes, you can pretty much see where this is going..] the assignment consists of a tutorial presentation, 10 minutes per person, where you attempt to answer questions on your allocated topic, while encouraging participation from the rest of the class. fun-diddly-un. you'd THINK that it'd be good that we're the first group presenting, if you assume the whole 'get it over and done with' view.. but i'm beginning to realise it was a baaaaad idea. our group is the first, so we're up for next monday [it's one group per week].. we're soo not ready. as a group, we're not cohesive, and in terms of answering the questions.. lol.. well.. i don't think we're very solid in that area either.. the guy in my group is hell bent on doing everything as an individual, and neither of them seem to understand what's meant by the requirement "choose a convenience restaurant to OBSERVE"... -__-" hmm well.. i guess there's no point griping about it now.. i'll just keep my fingers crossed for now..
on the bright side, japanese was alright today. i managed to meet a new person again ^__^ i also managed to make an idiot of myself but hey.. that's something i should be used to by now.
for the second half of jap, i was walking to the computer lab with ella and this chick who was walking near us asked us what exactly goes on in the lab. [a very good question actually, and the answer to that would be... a whole lot of nothing.] so i turn around and the first thing i say is, "eyyy... you have contacts!" no shit yenny, way to make a dick of yourself.
she had blue contact lenses.. veeery nifty.. =P
but yeah.. i ended up sharing a computer with her, her name is maria.. she's viet i think? most of her classes are based at carseldine though.. poor soul!!
after i finished for the day i wound up at.. you guessed it.. good old sunnybank, with krystle. i was looking for an optus sim card, but me being the stooge i am, i went everywhere to look for it except optus world -__-
saw frank and his girlfriend walking around [lol who knew he HAD one =P], and images ran through my head of me running through the carpark and whipping out my car keys, or any remotely sharp object, with a satanic grin on my face.. muahahaha.. but don't worry, no such thing happened =P theoretically, i'm the most evil person in the world, but in practice i'm just a big wuss =P
after that krystle and i decided we needed some way to boost our endorphins - by this point we'd landed ourselves at sunnybank hills shoppingtown. and God only knows [or perhaps i should say Satan], one of the easiest ways to do that is to commit some illegal activity and get away with it.
hmm.. oh look at the time, it's time for the simpsons! no further comment. muahahaha

"Time is of the essence..."
~~>Wednesday 27.07.05<~~
hmm.. essence of WHAT, exactly?? well no matter i guess.. right now i feel kinda pressed for time.. there's a million and one things to do before tomorrow.. sometimes i wish there were more hours in a day! but then.. that'd probably mean less hours sleep and more hours of being awake and tired.. hah -__-"
so what productiveness did i get up to today? well.. not much really. once again.
today i had every intention of going to class, since it was only one class after all, and japanese is definitely one of the best classes i have this sem.. it's actually remotely enjoyable.. hell.. it's been one of the best classes i've taken since i started uni, and i can say that with assurance even though it's only the second week!!
so anyway.. ngoc-iE showed up at QUT again when i was in class, and i was racking my brain to come up with some way of sneaking him in without the teacher pouncing and kicking us out lol. my brain isn't very creative, obviously, so instead of sneaking him in, i ended up grabbing my stuff and running out the door when she wasn't looking. kind of a shame though, as she'd instructed us to revise on yesterday's speaking phrases amongst ourselves.. which included practising how to ask someone for their phone number with the other students sitting around you.. and there's quite a few interesting guys in my class >=3... hahahaha jk jk =P
in the end, instead of 2 hours of mundane chanting ("a i e u o, ka ki ke ku ko, sa shi se su so......" lol) i spent the afternoon getting a dose of accelerated learning from ngoc who, conveniently, speaks japanese very well.. much more productive, if i do say so myself! he even taught me kanji for the phrases we would've been learning in class.. which would otherwise have only been in roomaji.. w00t!! huzzah for wagging, which leads to accelerated learning!! >=P
last night i lay in bed for a while just listening to my MD in the dark.. it was kind of comforting, cuz i was in one hell of a crappy mood. i stuck in my old disc of chinese songs, from back in the day when i actually used to listen to jay chou baaahahaha. hmm i guess i shouldn't laugh. i'm not a big fan of jay chou, and never really have been, but i have to admit some of his music is pretty good. i like the slower or more mellow songs of his, they help me to relax.. and they make for some gooooood driving music [hahaha but then again, so does asian kung-fu generation, and we all know how different those two genres are =P]
listening to jay chou made me feel kind of nostalgic. it reminded me of hanging out with togo, ping and ash that day aaaages ago.. yeah.. i remember togo and ash coming to pick me up.. and the whopping big lie i had to tell my parents about going to a "workshop at uni" just so i could get out lol. it was the first time i met togo.. which may sound strange, cuz she IS my 'vegemite sis' lol.. but yeah.. togo actually lived in china for a while, so even though we talked heaps on msn i'd never met her until that day.. it was so much fun.. =]
i remember how ecstatic i was when ash actually let me drive his car, even though i didn't have my licence yet back then.. especially when he'd said i drove better than bevan. muahahaha >=P
we drove to ping's house, cuz ash wanted to play basketball at griffith uni with him. lol.. then ping put us all to shame when he jumped into his sexy mazda 6. daaaarn... *shakes fist*
yeah.. that was a good day.. after basketball ping drove me to togo's uni [which is where she boards] and i spent a while running around her dorm and living areas with her, like a crazy, giggly little hyperactive schoolgirl..
ahhh *sigh* good, good memories...

What makes candy taste so good??
~~>Saturday 23.07.05<~~
is it the sugar?? or perhaps the 100% UNnatural flavourings, preservatives, colours.. *drool* ohhh coloooours...
whatever! the point is.. candy is soooo gooood.. and sweeet candy eeeases the pain.. =P
soo.. first week of uni huh.. it wasn't as bad as i'd thought.. well overlooking the fact that i skipped half the designated classes.. [and bearing in mind the classes scheduled for week one are only half of the total classes - the tutorials begin in week 2...] in each of the classes that i DID attend i managed to meet one new person, which i feel is somewhat productive *grins* considering that i don't really make friends easily -__- that's right.. beware of the biatch! =P hehe that's a joke.. sort of.. well i dunno.. *cough* hah moving right along..
as usual, my PR subject looks to be the crappiest, mainly because i've developed a loathing for public relations and the classes at QUT. there IS an explanation behind that, but let's be honest. nobody really CARES now, do they.
so far, japanese looks to be the best ^__^ i'm really glad i'm taking it as an elective this sem. i need some relief from the usual craptastic marketing and public relations units. the people i've met so far in jap seem really nice.. ella, and simon, if i recall correctly. actually, they're the white people =P the rest of the asians taking the class seem just plain weird. lol i'm not sure i'm allowed to make that kind of statement and have any chance of not getting beaten up. well they ARE! they're the kind of crazy asians who speak no english and rush around in hordes talking at the top of their lungs in their own crazy asian language going "narrrh nargh narh naaaargh"... thaaat's right, we all know the kind =P
well.. those were the only two classes i attended this week, so i guess that's as far as this little analysis/prediction/attempt-to-make-myself-feel-better for semester 2, 2005 goes -__-
tutes begin next week, which is something i am DEFINITELY not looking forward to =( the only reason the first week of uni was bearable is probably due to skipping half the classes and going out on nights when i should've been safely planted in a seat in z411.. *sigh* so yeah.. the REAL fun begins next week.. so brace yourself.. i expect there'll be QUITE a few gripes and moanings posted up by the end of next week.. =(
so what did i do on the nights when i SHOULD have been learning, learn-diddly-earning? =P monday night.. went to jaclyn's pool gathering at super8. i didn't go for the pool because, as anyone knows, i SUCK =P rather, i was there for the atmosphere and, as thong says, "the chat". ironically thong didn't end up going, which is a shame. "the chat" would've been QUITE interesting =P
eventually, after denise handed over her keys [she'd left her headlights on in the carpark so i offered to turn them off for her, and promptly nicked off with her keys after that], i was in the mood for driving >=D maybe not the smartest idea since i'd been drinking, but hey.. that drink was consumed was TWO whole hours ago! =P jimmy came along, but on the way towards the exit shanny suddenly popped up and began to bitch about super8's lack of pearl tea service, so we recruited him to come along as well. further along the way towards the exit we got sprung by jaclyn who demanded to know where we were going. LOL in the end the four of us made off with denise's car and went "cruisin" to the mt gravatt lookout purely because we didn't know where else to go on a monday night when everything would be closed =P
thanks again to chan for allowing me to force him to go out of his way and transport me home when i was in desperate need. =] photos from monday night can be seen in the 'recent photos' in the album.. lol and thanks once again to shanny for photo-sharing! >=D

Noooooo!! semester 2!! the fiasco begins again... >__<
~~>Friday 15.07.05<~~
*sigh* there it goes, all my winter holidays.. only 2 measly days remaining and semester 2 is fast bearing down upon us >=( i was looking forward to the holidays so much, then they came, they went, and i don't know where all the time has gone.. it feels like i've only been on holidays for a few days.. i want more, mooore, MOOOOORE!! haha like the greedy sod i am.
and i miss my hunni terribly, now that he's gone back to melbourne =( which makes swallowing the bitter uni pill harder.. i desperately don't want to go back to uni!! but everything has to go on.. *sigh* the only thing i'm looking forward to this sem is using up one of my electives.. ahhh preecious electives *drool drool* =P
went to jaclyn's house last night, i guess my parents are slooowly growing more lenient about this kind of stuff. well my mom anyway. my dad's just a big wuss and does anything to try to please with my mom -__=
we had dinner with jaclyn and her parents, hehe it was most delicious ^___^ i didn't know thong and kevin were there too beforehand but it was heaps fun! i saw a side of jaclyn's parents that i'd never seen before.. well because pretty much the only times i'd really seen them were back in high school when we used to carpool, and the only things i'd really say to her dad were "good morning mr duong" and "thank you mr duong" lol.
even though her parents don't speak perfect english, they still tried to make conversation with us, and laughed and joked and talked. which is more than can be said for SOME... -__- the fact that they tried in itself was just really nice, and it made the dinner fun.
an inability to speak perfect english shouldn't be a barrier, and it's certainly not an excuse to act like a snob...
we eventually ended up at.. lol you guessed it.. gooood old craptacular sunnybank, after going in circles from jaclyn's house to kevin's house and carindale.
it was nice to be able to kill time with friends on what would have been an otherwise boring thursday night, instead of being locked up at home in a cage like usual... *sigh* wish i could do it more often =(

~~>Sunday 26.06.05<~~
lol not that anyone will care about this, but i just discovered last night that my guestbook had been wiped. dang bravenet!! they didn't even have me registered as a member anymore lol. i didn't realise i was that invisible heh -__-" so anyway.. i created a new one last night, which means it's completely from scratch with no entries in it, nothing.. =( *feels sad* ... *HINT HINT* lol
yesterday my throat started going all demented >=( i guess i'm getting sick again. it was painful trying to sleep last night especially with the winter air being so cold. it really irritated my throat even further but i started on the lemon water and lemon and honey drinks today hah. fingers crossed it will cure my cold before wednesday.. although there's only so much citric acid a person's stomach can handle in one day =P *sigh*
getting sick is a craptacular start to the holidays huh! shanny is awfully ill as well.. hopefully he'll get better soon! get well soon shanny =]
hmm.. well.. the next thing to look forward to is wednesday! ^__^ when my hunni will finally be here =D w00t!! lol
well i'm off to burn my insides with more citric acid now *bleeeah*
*ends blog*

~~>Friday 24.06.05<~~
w00t!! yeah!! it's finally the holidays!! BUAHAHAHA i feel sleep deprived yet somehow so alive.. *grins*
well i'm off to attempt to start on a website for my underboss m0eie =P lol let's see how far i actually get! w00t omg and my 'one' key is finally working again so i have exclaimation marks back! w000t!! !!!!!!!!!!!! =P
toodle-oo sons!

It wastes our days...
~~>Saturday 21.05.05<~~
*sigh* yeeeah.. i should really be alseep.. but as usual, i'm not.. and then i wonder why i'm so sluggish in the morning. mehh.. it's on my to-do list, i'll deal with it later. -__-
hmm i just realised i haven't dated the last couple of blog entries.. haha oh well not like anyone reads them anyway. it seems pointless posting them up, but it seems to help clear my mind. somewhat. hah -__-
lately i've become obsessed with my preeecious copy [burned, needless to say =P] of 'initial D vocal battle special feat. the takahashi brothers' [jeez what a name!] i don't know what it is about the songs, but i can't stop playing them over and over and over. well most of them anyway..
it makes for great driving music.. cruising down the freeway in the dark with 'suggestion' [track #7, for anyone who's curious =P] turned up loud and not a care in the world.. it makes me feel so free.. =] wish things could be like that all the time.. -__-
hmm well anyway.. i think it's just the image of ryosuke and keisuke singing together that brings a smile haha yes, even though i KNOW they're just the anime characters and the REAL people doing the singing look completely different. but also the whole "togetherness" thing.. especially when they do the cover version of 'kiseki no hana'.. after snooping around, i learnt that the guys who do the voices of ryosuke and keisuke [takehito koyasu and tomokazu seki] have actually worked together on heaps of other series.. and seki tomokazu is fast becoming my new hero LOL =P i love his voice, it's so versatile. and plus he can actually sing half decently too.
if you're wondering why i'm so wrapped about it all, it's actually because he did the voice of kyo from 'fruits basket', one of my all-time favourite characters.. so i find the whole thing somewhat enchanting. haha silly, idealistic me.
but yes. anyway. went to jaclyn's birthday last friday night [and she kindly shared some photos from it with me.. which i will eventually get around to posting up in the album..] it's remarkable what it's like without my mom around.. not trying to be nasty or anything.. but it seems to bring out the best in my fahjah. he was so much more easy-going and agreeable.. ordinarily i would never have been allowed to go.. i'm still reeling from the fact that he actually let me drive to jaclyn's party out in woop-woop at night.
well.. i've successfully filled up a whole heap of space by ranting about absolutely nothing.. i'll be back to fix up this post later so it's not so full of meaningless crap.. =_-

wh00o0o my head's spinning >__< lol must be lack of sleep, or perhaps too much of it.. today i nearly fell asleep in the accounting lecture even though i must've slept like 10 hours last nite -__- i must be the biggest sloth =(
well 3/4's of my mid-sems are over and am i hell glad they are!! didn't fail any, although i could stand to have done better. meh. just one more one left - economics =S and damned if i understand any of it! bah!!
sucks that it's so late in the semester too.. mid-sem exam my ass.. more like 3/4 sem.. cuz it's only like 2 months till the end of this bitch ass semester anyway!! h00t-h00t-h00t ehhhehe
my mom's going back to malaysia for a week, which is sort of a good thing cuz at least i'll have some freedom.. lol. hopefully. maybe. -__-" depending on my fahjah. *sigh* freedom for one measly little week.. it's not like much can be done in just one week. and plus at the end of that week there's that blasted eco exam so most of it will be spent studying *angry face*
hmm okay none of what i'm typing seems to make any sense to me so i'm guna head off and watch some naruto. lol. because that's just totally the solution to everyone's problems. hah hah hah.
toodle-oo, sons.

Must be that time of the month again -__-"
*sigh* what a long and somewhat hideous day. i have an exam tomorrow for which i have studied, yet seem to remember nothing about.. =S tried the practice questions on the website and the OLT and i did alright, didn't fail any sets of the quizzes.. but i just know that once i walk into the exam room [which will most likely be overcrowded and everyone will be digging into each other with their elbows and reading over each others' shoulders], i'll forget absolutely anything i may have retained in my memory about that subject. -___-
i'm feeling somewhat useless atm, it seems like my life is half up, half down, and a messed up confusion of everything scattered around everywhere.. sort of like my room.. o_O i feel like i'd be much more comfortable if i just dug myself a pit, crawled into it and didn't come out for a while, and didn't try to make any contact with any other forms of human life. hmmm. must be that time of the month again.
today on the way back from sunnybank [krystle and i went to hand in application forms at this crazy asian pearl tea place.. needless to say i highly doubt that either of us will get a job there anyway.. darn crazy asians], the traffic along mains road was absolutely hideous. it was only 3.30 in the afternoon, yet the road was so crammed full of cars. i remember commenting to krystle "why the hell is it taking so long.. i bet there's an accident somewhere" which now that i think about it is somewhat uncanny.. because a few moments later i slammed on the brakes to avoid hitting the car in front of me which had stopped for the red light, and seconds after that we heard a loud noise and we realised that the cars behind us had crashed. >__<
oddly enough, to me it didn't sound like i'd thought a car crash would sound. it sort of just sounded like a big "POP", or like as though someone had slammed down the boot of their car in a fit of rage. yeah, i distinctly remember thinking someone was driving with their trunk open and after they'd braked at the lights, it had snapped itself shut or something.
for a while krystle and i sat there thinking "omg did we CAUSE that accident?!", the logic being that if i had braked gradually at a distance further back then they would have done so too, and not had to slam on the brakes so hard after i did.. i saw the driver of the tarago behind us get out and head for the car that had crashed into her, but no one approached us and so i continued driving once the light turned green, even though we felt horrible all the way home.
maybe i'll give up on driving for a while. -__-

A revolutionary plan! yes! finally! i've found some direction for my life... -__-"
today was the last week for that business advantage workshop.. i'm kind of sorry it's come to an end so quickly.. lol and not JUST because they served food every week =P at the end we all got big envelopes with certificates and letters of completion in them.. hehe *feels honoured*
this asian chick sat next to dian and i, and we all talked a fair bit. she was really nice but unfortunately the nice people that you meet and talk to are usually the people that you'll never see again. *sigh* it's a big lonely world out there.
one of the things we talked about was work experience and future employment *eep, there's that hideous E word again* lol but we came to the conclusion [well dian stated this anyway] that if we couldn't find jobs we'd just move overseas and teach english in one of those asian countries. ehhhehehe my plan all along! well.. after seeing that foreign correspondent program on ABC about the ever-present demand for english teachers in korea anyway.
it's a maaarvellous solution if i do say so myself! i'll get to travel, REALLY experience a country first hand, and break free of the current square that i live in WHILE doing something worthwhile.. lol and if i have to get paid while doing it, then SO be it that's what i say! =P haha and avoid repaying my HECS debt!! w00t!! ehhhehehe just kidding just kidding. i have every intention of paying it back, but i don't think it'd kill little johnny howard and his government to wait a couple of years for it.
right now, i have my eyes on japan *drool * drool* heehee. it's almost like a delayed reaction from knowing someone like blair.. lol back in the days, year 11 or so, when he used to be like obsessed with japanese things.. hmm..
it works out rather nicely, i reckon. i highly doubt i'll be able to study overseas afterall, although the exchange program looks soooo good T__T and since i doubt i'll be able to afford that huge travelling spree to celebrate the end of uni like i'd originally planned, i guess teaching overseas straight after will be one way of solving the travelling issue =]
i can't really think of anything else to do right now. when i graduate i'll be 19.. yeap.. 19 with a bachelor degree in business that i'll have no idea what to do with, and i just know.. i can feel it right now.. that i'll be out of place. too young to settle into an office job properly.. lol mainly because i have this complex where i feel like most people don't take a young person seriously.. bah.. lol.. and working for a firm, even just a small one, is not something i want to do when i'm 19. i want to travel, and see things, experience things, do things while i'm still young.
mmm. i guess i'll just end this post rather abruptly here, since i'm raving again. i should've started my work when i got home but instead i got distracted on the computer. time to continue studying for mid-sems =(
fare thee well till then. hehe =P

Fan fics are a deadly drug...
~~>Monday 21.03.05<~~
*sigh* it's 12.02am.. yes. monday morning.. i should've gone to sleep ages ago considering i usually crash from exhaustion halfway through the day.. but for some reason i've been sitting at my comp for hours and hours, unwilling to go to sleep.
LOL well actually i do know why. i've been sitting on my bum for the last few hours ..heh.. reading Fruits Basket fan fics... lol yeah, am i sad or am i sad.. -__-"
i know, i know.. i've seen the series oogles of times before but i've just recently rekindled my love for the anime [yeah.. i'll always have a soft spot for that show, say what you want =P].. i was devastated when it ended after episode 26, being an avid fan i'd hoped it would go on and on, like some kind of unrealistic dream.
hehe but the solution, of course? fan fics! suuure, reading isn't the same as watching cartoon movements on your screen and letting your eyes glaze over, nor is it the same as reading the manga [they may be still, but at least they're pictures!!].. but fan fics allow imaginations to run wild, and if you're obsessed enough with the characters [like me ^__~], you can even imagine each character saying and acting out what's been written in the story. w00 fan fics are so addictive!!
haha that, and i was killing time while trying to mass-download the anime itself. yeeeeees, that's right.. i'm now only 7 episodes away from having the series myself.. mmm yeah.. in the past i'd been watching ngoc's copy.. [thanks ngoc-iE! =P]
yeah so now it's just a matter of obtaining myself a burner and burning the preeecious, preeecious episodes onto disc.. *drool* *drool*
ooh i can't wait! >__<

Ten things i hate about her...
~~>Friday 18.03.05<~~
yes, that's right. we all know who she is. she's the kind of person who thinks she's cool, the kind who tries to make "friends" with everyone, but the instant your back is turned she's got her dagger poised and ready to stab.
it's unfortunate. but that's the way she is.
how someone such as herself has survived for so long is simply beyond me.
by right, she should be the most lonely person in the world. by right, she should not have a single friend left. why should she, she'd only abuse them anyway.
it just really gets to me.. really strikes me as unfair.. as to how she treats other people.
to me, she's not a human being.
how can anyone so treacherous and conniving be considered a human? someone so devious and scheming that in order to be so nasty they must surely be devoid of any feeling, of any emotion, of any conscience or morality!
that's why to me she's inhuman. all her tears, her acting, her pretentious breakdowns, they're all fake.
i just don't understand why no one else can see that.....

Stupid juvenile deliquents.. burn! burn!!
~~>Sunday 13.03.05<~~
bah!! on friday night around 2am [well technically saturday morning..] there were these two guys hanging around my street. i was half asleep at first but i could hear their voices - initially i thought someone had their TV up really loud, then i figured it must be the neighbour since they always have young visitors over.
it actually turned out to be these losers completely unrelated to anyone in the street [well at least i think so anyway], who had sat themselves under the neighbour's mango tree down the road and were talking really, really loudly. [i figured this out after becoming frustrated that the fuckers would not shut UP and went to give them death stares from the window].
and pardon my swearing, but FUCK.. were they annoying! i don't know if this is the way all teenage guys talk these days, but every second word out of their mouth was "oi" or "nah".
"nah nah nah, oi, it's your turn cunt."
...
"oi, i want to do this. nah, cuz oi. nah. oi. just listen to me."
...
"oi. oi, nah. oi why'd you fucken invite her"
...
it seemed like they were just saying "oi" for the sake of it, or because they had no other words to fill up the gaps in their sentences - a result of their extremely limited vocabulary.
it just really, really irritated me. i mean what the fuck were they doing there in first place?! it was like.. 2 fucking am, pissing down rain, and i live at the top of the hill so if i could hear their voices from all the way up, they must've been talking REALLY fucking loud.
i couldn't sleep until the fuckers pissed off, eventually they just wandered away to another street i suppose.
what am i trying to say here?
well.. you fucking juvenile delinquents, if you're going to be inconsiderate enough to wake everyone up at 2am with your inane conversations and annoying voices, at least learn to build your vocabulary so you don't sound like complete and utter fucking dimwitted idiots.
... well. "peace out" people.

I love dangerous guys. so. =P ahhhhahaha i've just discovered another website wonderfully dedicated to naruto, with so much stuff on it, it'd take you like 3 days to work through! subarashiiiiii!! *faints in delight*
take their naruto personality tests, it'll crack you up =P
scroll down to the bottom of this frame for the link.
the one with uchiha itachi.
aaaall the way down.
that's right. =D

Saturday 12.02.05 ~~>Because I Love You | Shakin' Stevens<~~
lol long time no see huh?! ehhhehe yeeeap that's right.. i'm finally back and doling out bucketloads of craptacular ranting for all.. plenty for all! >__<
haha yeah.. soooo.. how the time flies huh.. there's only like 2 weeks before uni starts *cries* T__T don't wanna go baaaack!!
i guess i should be out making the most of what holidays i have left.. but i'm stuck at home with no transport.. my mom took her car, fair enough because she left her weekly train ticket for me to use, but then my dad decided he wanted to go out, took the ticket AND on top of that, took his car as well. jeeeez how greedy can someone get?! so.. no transport for me.. looks like it's just you and me, mr computer.. *evil grin*
ah well.. at least i have my studio ghibli dvds.. *clings to boxed set* you can't take my baaaby, noo0o0ooo0o!! >__<
ehhhehe ooookay i'll shut up now.. haven't blogged in ages, i guess i'm getting off track quite a lot. well since i'm sitting on my ass now, i guess i might as well try to fix up my site.. bah!! that's what i said like 8 weeks ago ahhhahaha -__-
well.. better get to it then.. toodle-oo!

now playing: 'Reprise' | Spirited Away OST

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