The Best Thing ch. 9 -13{JB}

by Victoria L. on January 31, 19100 at 21:02:00:

Hey, all! I couldn't resist adding this chapter, for Janis especially since she left that big cliffhanger. LOL. Let me know what you think.
Victoria L.

Chapter 9

Brenda left the Java House 45 minutes after Jax left. Denise and Carly
were quiet, and Brenda knew what they must be thinking. As much as she
longed to correct them, she didn’t. Part of her didn’t mind that they thought
she was falling for Jax. At least she knew she wasn’t, and that was the
truth--wasn’t it?
That next evening, Brenda picked Jody up from daycare and headed
for the Port Charles Elementary School, so she could attend Victoria’s PTA
meeting. Even though her biological son wouldn’t be joining kindergarten
for another year, she was one of the most active mothers in the program.
Victoria usually introduced Brenda as her mother, and while the other
teachers knew that Brenda and Jax weren’t married, the relationship wasn’t
explained to the children in her class, and Victoria rather liked that. She saw
Brenda as her mother and couldn’t have loved her more.

Brenda gathered her things and went into the cafeteria for the
meeting. A few people were already there. The Donna Reed types, Brenda
mentally noted to herself, all standing around the punch table, exchanging
recipes and talking about nothing at all. Then her eyes fixed upon the single
fathers who had a little society of their own. She saw Jax standing among
them, Victoria sitting Indian style on top of his shoes, grinning up at her
father. As Jax leaned down to pick his daughter up, Brenda noticed that he
got several looks of approval from the Donna Reed types, across the room.
She decided to really give them something to talk about. She walked over to
Jax and slapped him lightly on the butt as he bent over. He straightened up
immediately, Victoria in his arms, laughing rather loudly.
“Hey mommy,” she said, waving at Brenda and sticking her tongue out
at Jody, who promptly returned the favor.

“What was that for?” Jax asked, as the group of fathers chuckled lightly,
slapped Jax on the back heartily, and gingerly made their way over to the
seething group of Donna Reed types.
“Have fun, Jax,” Charlie Sloane said, shaking Jax’s free hand and shaking
his head at the same time.
“I couldn’t resist,” Brenda said, smiling devilishly. “I had to give those
busybodies something to talk about.”
“Well mission accomplished,” Jax said, daring to turn around and look.
“You’ll be giving Mary-Ann Spencer and the rest of her friends idle gossip for
the next six months.” Victoria began to wriggle loose of her father’s grasp,
and he put her down on the floor so she could join her friends in a play
group. Jody toddled over to join them as well, while Brenda kept one eye on
him, and the other eye on Jax. “So,” Jax continued, “What’s going on with
you?”

“Nothing much,” Brenda said. “I’ve been getting a few more calls than
usual about expanding Java House. They want to go commercial and they
want me to do a chain.”
“Well how far reaching?” Jax asked.
“Right now they’re just talking upstate New York, and in a few years,
the Big Apple itself. Hell, I’m rumored to be the next Dean and Deluca.”
“Well isn’t that what you want?” Jax asked.
“I guess,” Brenda said. She really did love her shop, and she had gone
to business school to earn her degree, but right now, her one little shop was
enough for her. “Well,” Brenda sighed, “you know that Java House was
Daniel’s dream--”
“Yes, but you made it great, Brenda. You made it what it is today.”
Brenda shrugged, blushing slightly at his compliments.
“Well thank you,” she sighed. “And I’ll think about it, I really will. I just
don’t know if I need or want the responsibility. I’m not sure I can handle it.”
Just then, Amber Richardson, the head of the PTA, called the meeting to
order. Jax and Brenda took some seats kind of in the back and Jax whispered
in her ear, “You can handle anything.”

She smiled, her eyes cast downward. But when she looked up and noticed
Gwyneth Stonecypher standing among a group of teachers, and then noticed
Jax was noticing her too, Brenda wasn’t so sure she could handle anything at
all. Brenda was grateful when she saw Gwyneth and some of the other
teachers take seats in the front row, facing the parents. Gwyneth looked
stunning, as usual, but she had a casualness about her. Her hair was down,
hanging loosely on her shoulders. She wore a white turtleneck and a pair of
black slacks. Brenda also noticed that she barely had on any make up, yet she
still looked gorgeous. Brenda tried to control her feelings. She knew
Gwyneth and she would probably be friends if she hadn’t seen that kiss that
Jax gave her last night in the parking lot of the Java House.

The meeting droned on, and Brenda leaned her head on Jax’s shoulder. His
arm went instinctively around her and Brenda relaxed a little. Just then,
Amber Richardson piped up about an introduction of the new teachers.
“Everyone, before we adjourn this meeting, I’d like to take a moment
and introduce some of the new faces that we have. It is the middle of the
term, and some of these teachers have been with us from the start of the year,
and one of them is new to us this very month, but they are all new additions
to our teaching staff.” Amber pointed to a gentleman in his mid 30s. “This is
Mr. Reynolds,” she said. “He’s the new basketball coach at the high school, as
well as little league coach and new Geography teacher. This,” she went on,
pointing to a red haired woman, “Is Mrs. Langley. She our new first grade
teacher, and then there’s Ms. Stonecypher, our new kindergarten teacher.”
Gwyneth smiled and nodded slightly to the crowd. She spotted Jax and
blushed slightly, but didn’t continue to stare at him. Jax, however, did
continue to stare at her. Just when Brenda thought she couldn’t take it
anymore, her eyes rested on her son, Jody. He was playing with a toy
dinosaur, and all of a sudden, a memory rushed back to Brenda. Daniel had bought Jody a boat load of dinosaur toys when he found out Brenda was
pregnant.

Dinosaurs were Daniel’s favorite, and playing with that green one just now,
Jody looked incredibly like his father. It almost took Brenda’s breath away.
Then she decided right then that she was being silly and possessive over Jax.
Almost nothing had come of his relationship with Gwyneth, and it was quite
possible nothing ever would. It didn’t matter even if it did, however, because
Jax wasn’t hers for the taking. And right now, if someone, including Jax, had
asked her to give him a chance, she would have turned them down flat. As
much as she loved Jax, she didn’t love him that way, and their relationship
worked now perfectly. It was the most constructive, functional relationship
she’d ever had with another human being besides her son, and she cherished
the role Jax played in her life. She realized then that that was all she wanted
from Jax. She didn’t want more, and she didn’t need more, she just didn’t
want him getting involved with another woman to mean that she would get
even less. Brenda decided then that she would be happy for Jax and stop
worrying that he was going to be taken away from her. She actually liked
Gwyneth and couldn’t have picked someone better for him. Now that she
had time to think about it, she approved of a potential relationship.

When the meeting finally ended, Brenda got pulled away from Jax to
discuss the next meeting with a few moms that were single mothers like her,
and definitely not a part of the Donna Reed clique.
“Brenda,” Georgia Mayfield crooned, “When did you and Jasper Jacks
get so close?!”
“What do you mean?” Brenda asked.
“Come on,” Ruby Wainwright said. “We saw him with his arm around
you and your head on his shoulder. What’s going on between you two?”
“There isn’t anything going on between Jax and I,” Brenda assured
them. “He is my very good friend. Acting father to my son, you guys know
that already.”
“Yes we did,” Georgia said, “but I saw a look in your eye that I haven’t
seen in a long time.”

“And what look was that?” Brenda asked.
“Comfort,” Ruby supplied. “You looked very nearly perfectly content.”
Brenda was a little taken aback, but she supposed they were right. Still, there
was a perfectly logical explanation, wasn’t there?
“I was just tired,” Brenda offered. “It didn’t mean anything.” Brenda
saw their looks of disbelief, so to convince them, and partly to convince
herself, she considered telling them that Jax was interested in someone else.
But could she, should she, say that it was the new kindergarten teacher? Jax
getting serious with anyone brought out the daggers in all the ladies of the
PTA, and she felt sorry for the unsuspecting mother or teacher that won Jax’s
heart. Brenda smiled to herself, and then was about to speak when Tiffany
Edwards came running over to the group. She was dragging her son behind
her.
“Hello everyone,” she said, stopping to catch her breath. “Did you all
just see that?”
“See what?” they all asked in unison, but Brenda, just a little bit louder
than everyone else.

“Jasper Jacks just walked over to the group of new teachers and he
took that kindergarten teacher’s hand, and kissed it--in front of everyone!” A
collective sound of sighs and whispers and murmuring surrounded Brenda as
she stared over the crowd of women to see Jax standing with his arm loosely
around Gwyneth, talking to the two other new teachers. Jax and the
basketball coach, Mr. Reynolds, were having a lively conversation and Jax was
motioning as if he were sinking an easy basket from the three point line. Jax
was much more animated than Brenda had ever seen him, except for in
private with her, that is, and with his children. She decided to let him be, and
didn’t engage in the gossip.
“I was just about to tell you guys that he was seeing someone new,”
Brenda said.
“But I thought you and Jax were seeing each other!” Georgia and Ruby
exclaimed at the same time.
“Really?” Brenda shook her head and sighed. Another string of gossip
was about to be thrown into the lines of communication, and she figured that
by tomorrow morning, every eligible woman in Port Charles would be eyeing
new prospects with the news that Jasper Jacks had begun dating again.
When the meeting finally drew to a complete close, and everyone was
starting to go home, Brenda was putting Jody into his car seat when she
heard Jax’s distinctive laughter coming out of the building. She wasn’t
surprised to see that he and Gwyneth were the last ones out of the building.
Brenda and Jax had parked next to each other, the way they always managed
to do, so Brenda took an extra long time finishing with Jody and walking
around to her side of the car. Jax saw her out of the corner of his eye, and
rather than soothing Brenda’s hurt feelings later, he went over to her, pulling
Gwyneth behind him.

“Hello there,” Brenda said, opening her car door and glancing in at her
son. His eyelids were a little droopy, and she knew she should get him home.
“Hi,” Jax said. Jax searched his mind, trying desperately to come up
with some excuse to talk to Brenda. Gwyneth found a topic for them.
“I really enjoyed meeting all the parents tonight. And Mrs. Buchanan, I
have to tell you, Victoria talks about you all the time. She’s a real joy to teach.”
“Please, call me Brenda,” said Brenda. It warmed Brenda’s heart a little
to hear Gwyneth speak so fondly of Victoria. She really must be a good
teacher if Victoria hadn’t complained about her. Victoria was very picky in
the people she liked and disliked, and she had Jax’s ability to read people and
size them up. If Victoria liked Gwyneth, then there was no reason Brenda
shouldn’t either. Brenda made up her mind then to stop giving Jax such a
hard time. She engaged them in a lively conversation for about ten minutes,
and Gwyneth and Brenda both started to breathe easier once they realized
they had a few things in common. Both of them loved to bake, but Gwyneth
had far more talents in the kitchen than Brenda did. Gwyneth, however, gave
the coffee making prize to Brenda. Brenda found herself liking Gwyneth
even more. When the conversation eased a little, Gwyneth kissed Jax ever so slightly on the cheek, shook Brenda’s hand, and gave a little wave to Jody,
inside the car. She said goodnight, and walked away. Brenda’s eyes followed
her a little, but Jax’s stayed with her until she got into her car and drove out
of the parking lot. “You like her,” Brenda said.

“I do,” Jax confirmed, “But it’s important to me that you like her as
well.”
“Actually,” Brenda admitted, “I really was looking for any reason in the
world not to like her--” Jax chuckled-- “but I really do. Honestly. Yeah,”
Brenda said, smiling to herself. “If she’s got Victoria’s seal of approval, she’s
got mine. She’s a lovely person from what I know of her, and I think you guys
are cute together, so you have my blessing,” Brenda said, giving Jax a graceful
bow. He pulled her into a hug suddenly.

“And you know that means the world to me,” Jax said. “I love you so
much, Brenda. You’re so important to me.” Brenda was a little shocked,
being in his arms this way, and him saying he loved her. Of course, she knew
what he meant, and she wasn’t close to loving him in that way. But he was her
best friend, and if there was any man she loved on this planet, it was him.
“I love you too, Jax. It’s time you were happy. Really. Go for it.”
“I think I will,” he said, giving her a wink, and climbing into his car. He
honked the horn as they both pulled out of the parking lot and drove away in
different directions.

chp 10

Hey all! Wow, I got a lot of emails about this story and it seems you guys want a certain couple to hook up very soon. All I can say is patience is a virtue, and LOL, you won't have to wait that long! I promise!
Victoria L. Let me know what you think.

Chapter 10

The next few weeks went by easily for Brenda. She and Jax saw less of
each other, but neither of them had time to notice. Restaurant critics came
left and right, and Brenda was earning stars all across the board. She couldn’t
be happier with the Java House’s progress and was actually considering
opening up another shop in Clinton, a nearby town.
Brenda hadn’t really gotten a chance to talk to Jax much, but she had
spoken to Denise on a daily basis. As a friend to both Jax and Brenda, Brenda
always made sure to grill Denise thoroughly about the goings on in Jax’s life.
She found herself mildly disappointed. Denise had informed Brenda that for
the past three weeks, Gwyneth and Jax had been on more than 15 dates. To
the movies, the park, out to eat, and to the museum.
“Well,” Brenda had commented one windy fall afternoon at the Java
House, “she hasn’t passed the final test.”
“What final test?” Denise asked, putting the top on a cappuccino and
handing it to Brenda.
“THE final test. You say that Gwyneth and Jax have been all of these
places around town, but if you’ll notice, he hasn’t brought her back here
since the party, and--”
“That’s because he’s afraid you’ll eat her alive,” Carly chimed in, coming
into the shop and moving past Denise and Brenda to get to the back room.

Brenda rolled her eyes and continued.
“AND, the most important thing, she has not earned entrance into the
house.”
“What are you talking about?” Denise said, putting her hands on her
hips and smiling at Brenda.
“I’m just saying,” Brenda said, shrugging her shoulders, “that she can’t
be that important to Jax if he hasn’t invited her over to have dinner or watch
a movie at his house.”
“You’ve been thinking about this a lot, haven’t you?” Carly asked,
leaning in between them and placing a tray of bagels on the counter. Carly
looked up and gave Brenda a wink as she retired yet again.
“I haven’t been thinking about it all that much,” Brenda said, looking
away and putting on a pair of food gloves. “It’s just commonsense, that’s all.”
“Uh-huh,” Denise said, taking the money from a customer and giving
them change. “Common sense, huh? Well why don’t you share a bit more of
your logic with me, Brenda.”
“Fine,” Brenda said defensively, “I will. Well take Victoria, for example.
When she likes someone, she raves about them. When she met you, it was
‘Denise this’ and ‘Denise that.’ She couldn’t get enough of you.”
“And?”

“Well, I’ve spoken to her--” just then Brenda realized she hadn’t seen or
spoken to Victoria or Jasmine in an entire week. “I--I’ve spoken to her here
lately,” Brenda amended, “and she hasn’t mentioned Gwyneth to me once.”
“So, you know how children are. You can’t base all of your
assumptions on that.”
“True,” Carly said, coming from the back with a tray of muffins. Brenda
looked at her incredulously, and this time, Carly stopped to speak with them
both.
“What do you know about it?” Brenda asked, smiling softly.
“Tell her about it please,” Denise said, feigning fatigue. “Girlfriend is
not listening to me. She’s invested in a pair of blinders.”
“Brenda, you haven’t seen Jax or the kids in weeks,” Carly stated.
“I’ve been busy,” Brenda said.
“Right. When have you ever been to busy for those children? You’re
their mother, aren’t you, in every way that counts.”
“Oh, said that right,” Denise said. Carly turned and slapped her a high
five.
“Can I get a witness?” Carly asked in a booming voice.
“Amen, sister girl,” Denise said, laughing loudly and pushing the cash
register closed with her hip.
“The two of you are warped,” Brenda said, turning her back on them
and taking the bagels off of the tray and putting them into the display case.
“Brenda,” Carly said, “tell the truth. The reason you haven’t seen Jax or
Victoria or Jasmine is not because you’ve been so busy, it’s because you don’t
want to see how close Gwyneth and Jax are getting.” Carly was serious now.
Brenda knew she could count on Carly to give it to her straight. Carly didn’t
mince words with anyone. Carly’s ponytail bounced as she shook her head at
Brenda. “Poor baby,” she said. “Look, if you’re having such a hard time with
this, why don’t you talk to Jax about it?” Brenda stood and put the tray down
a little too loudly.

“I’m not having a problem, Carly!” Denise turned to look at her as if to
say, ‘No you didn’t raise your voice to one of your closest friends!’ Carly
looked a little taken aback, and she stepped back from Brenda a bit, but
Brenda immediately softened and smiled weakly at Carly. “I’m sorry,” she
said, sighing. “I didn’t mean for that to come out the way that it did. Look,
I’m not having a problem with Jax and Gwyneth, really, I’m not. But you two
seem to have a problem with the fact that I’m NOT having a problem with it.”
“No we’re not,” Denise said. “We just want you to be honest with
yourself about what you’re feeling--”
“I am,” Brenda insisted.
“And if you are,” Denise said, “then we’re behind you 1,000%.”
“Yeah,” Carly said, “and we promise to quit busting your chops, okay?”
Brenda nodded, and sighed to herself. Just then, the phone rang. “Oh, I’ll get
that,” Carly said. When Carly left, Denise took on another customer. Brenda
leaned against the counter as she worked.
“Carly’s here now, and you can take off, you know,” Brenda said. She
looked at her watch. “You know you can go home now, don’t you? I mean,
don’t you want to see Martin?” Denise’s hands stopped in mid air as she was
counting out change. Brenda noticed, but Denise covered and gave the
woman her change. “Denise, are you okay?” Brenda asked.
“I’m fine,” Denise said. “And I really don’t have to go home just yet, if
that’s okay with you.”
“What are you talking about?” Brenda asked. “You’re always itching to
get out of here early.”
“Not today,” Denise said softly.

“What?” Brenda asked, not quite hearing her.
“Nothing,” Denise said. “I can stay, but if you don’t have anything for
me to do, I can make myself scarce.”
“What are you talking about?” Brenda asked Denise. “You know we can
always use you around here--you’re a customer favorite, you know.”
“I do know that,” Denise smiled, pushing her long braids over one
shoulder. “Thanks for letting me stay,” she said sincerely.
“Of course,” Brenda said, putting a hand on her arm. She was about to
push Denise for further information, as it wasn’t like Denise to be acting so
strangely; She was one of the strongest women she knew. Carly came out,
though, and interrupted Brenda.
“Brenda, it’s Judy Stuart, the advertising rep Jax put you in touch
with--you want me to have her call you back?” she asked, when she saw the
look on Brenda’s face. Denise gave her a ‘let it go’ look, and Brenda took the
phone from Carly.

“Thanks,” Brenda said quietly as she watched Denise go into the back
and Carly take her place at the register. Brenda wanted to push Denise
further, but she let it go. She took a seat at a corner table towards the front of
the shop, and spoke softly, so as not to bother the other customers.
“Mrs. Buchanan, this is Judy Stuart. Jasper Jacks put me in charge of
advertising for your coffee shop, the Java House.”
“Yes, that’s right,” Brenda said, excitement growing in her. She’d
always had a successful shop, but things were starting to really pick up for
Java House, and she never thought that she’d have the strength to make
Daniel’s dream come true. But now she was beginning to.
“Well Mr. Jacks seems to think you should start off big, with a
commercial, and some radio ads--”
“Wait just a moment,” Brenda said, putting a hand up in the air, despite
the fact that Ms. Stuart couldn’t see her over the phone. “I really want to do
this, believe me, I do, but I think you’re moving a little too fast for me.”
“Mr. Jacks tells me that you’ve been considering becoming a chain and
that it’s almost written in stone.”

“Yes,” Brenda said, a little annoyed with Jax for handling so much of
this for her, “but nothing is concrete yet, I’ve just been looking at a few empty
places to rent. Listen, I don’t think I’m ready for the camera quite yet. I was
thinking more of some T-shirts, some caps, you know, maybe an ad in the
phone book.” Ms. Stuart was silent on the other end of the line for a moment.
“Mrs. Buchanan, I understand that it was your husband’s dream to
make the Java House a success.” The words stung, no matter how easy or
harsh Ms. Stuart had meant them. Had Jax let her in on that little piece of
information as well? Brenda tried to calm her nerves before she spoke. Her
voice was deathly quiet.
“Yes, it was my husband’s dream, but it’s mine as well. I DO want it to
be a success.”
“Well,” Ms. Stuart said, “I don’t want to sound harsh, but if T-shirts,
coffee mugs, and caps were all you had in mind, you certainly don’t need me.
I have clients that require time and attention. I don’t mean to be rude, but I
can’t afford to take you on if you aren’t going to use my services to the
fullest.” Brenda didn’t quite know what to say to that.

“I--I know that your time is very important to you, Ms. Stuart, but if you
could just give me a bit more time to think, I--”
“Unfortunately, Mrs. Buchanan, I don’t have time to wait for you. I did
this as a favor for Mr. Jacks. I really don’t have the time to take you on in any
case. The Java House has great potential. The market is ripe and ready, but if
you’re too scared to do anything about it, I’m afraid I can’t help you.”
“Scared?!” Brenda asked. “I am NOT scared--”
“Well then give me a call when you’ve made up your mind. Good
afternoon.” There was a click and dial tone on the other line before Brenda
could open her mouth and respond. She hung the phone up and sighed to
herself. Denise and Carly seemed to be handling things fine, so she sat back
and took a bit of a break. As they worked, Brenda watched them smile and
chat briefly with the customers at the tables and in line. Brenda knew how
much the Java House meant to the both of them. Denise was a silent partner,
but she’d backed Brenda with a lot of capital in the past. With Daniel gone,
this was just as much Denise’s place as it was Brenda’s. They’d taken Carly on
for extra help, but with the rising popularity of the Java House, Brenda
realized that they needed extra help. They could afford to hire at least two
other people, and she didn’t even want to think of the hiring she’d have to do if they became a chain. But how could she not do everything she could to
make it all happen?

It’s what Daniel wanted, it’s what Denise wanted, and Carly seemed to be in
for the long haul, as well. She was studying to get her degree in physical
therapy, but lack of finances had forced her to take some time off and devote
herself to earning the almighty dollar, just to pay tuition. They had all
sacrificed, and they were all invested in the Java House. She had to do what
she could to make it happen. Brenda decided that right then.
But before she called Ms. Stuart back, and before she told Denise and
Carly her plans, she was going to give Jasper Jacks the same treatment she
gave Jody when he got out of line--a darn good spanking! Brenda smiled just a
little through her anger at the thought of having Jasper Jacks over her knee.
She grabbed her coat and came to lean over the front of the counter.
“You guys, is it okay if I clear out of here?” Denise kept working, but
Carly looked up at Brenda.
“Sure, but what’s going on? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Brenda said through gritted teeth. “And I won’t be gone that
long, I just have to speak to Jax for a moment, and then I’ll be back later on
tonight to give you guys a hand.”
“Well it’s fine with me,” Carly said. They both looked at Denise who
didn’t bother looking up. She did look up though, when she realized they
were waiting for her answer.
“Hmm? Oh, yeah, sure whatever.” Brenda was about to say something,
but Carly just shook her head. Brenda smiled gratefully and hurried out the
door.
“I’ll be back,” she called again, over her shoulder. Once she’d left, and
the customers dwindled down, Carly spoke to Denise.
“I heard some of what she was saying about Gwyneth having not been
to Jax’s house yet,” she said.
“Mm-hmm,” Denise said, resting her chin on her knuckles.

“Well,” Carly said. “Did you tell her that he’s been to HER house.”
“And get my head torn off?” Denise asked incredulously. “I am NOT
crazy--unlike our boss.” Carly just chuckled and went on with her work.
Once Brenda reached Jax’s house, she was practically seething. She
knew that she shouldn’t let Victoria or Jasmine see her so angry with their
father, but once they were safely upstairs, she’d tear into him for all she was
worth. She slammed her car door, and in her haste to get to the front door,
she almost stepped out of her shoe. Stopping to put it back on, she had a
second to think--maybe she shouldn’t be as angry as she was with Jax. Ms.
Stuart was certainly a busy woman. Some of the most successful small
businesses in Port Charles had gotten their start in her agency, including
Luke’s Club and The Outback. Both places were chains in New York,
Pennsylvania, and Vermont. But thought didn’t stop the anger Brenda was
feeling at having Jax reveal so much about Daniel. But had he really revealed
all that much? He’d probably had to do a bit of selling to get Ms. Stuart, favor
or no favor.

Brenda knocked on the door, fully prepared to give Jax his, as Denise
put it, ‘Who did it and what for!’ Jax opened the door breathlessly and
seemed surprised to see Brenda. He glanced at his watch.
“It’s 6:30, shouldn’t you be at the Java House?” he asked.
“Never mind the time, Jasper,” she said, using his full name only when
she was angry. He recognized her tone and demeanor immediately.
“Brenda, I meant to tell you, but--”
“But nothing,” Brenda said, “I can’t believe you told Judy Stuart all of
that about Daniel and me!”
“What is it that you think I told her?!” Jax said defensively. Brenda got
the distinct feeling just then that Jax didn’t know what she was talking about.
Before Brenda could answer, Victoria came barreling past her father and
wrapped her arms around Brenda’s waist.
“Mommy!” she said. “I’m so glad you’re here! We’ve been having the
best time! Come in, come in!” Jax stepped aside and looked down at the
floor as Brenda allowed herself to be dragged inside. As usual, she wasn’t
prepared at all for what she saw. Gwyneth came out of Jax’s kitchen with an
apron on, and a dish towel in her hand.

“Come along, Victoria,” she was saying. “The cookies have cooled and
they’re ready to decorate--” Victoria stopped when Gwyneth came around
the corner. Gwyneth stopped short at the sight of Brenda. Brenda stood
speechless as well. Jax just cleared his throat, and slowly closed the door--this
was going to be a long evening.

chp 11

Hey, all, okay, here's the deal--I know that I promised you guys a lot of things would be happening in this chapter--BUT, I thought that these particular scenes deserved a chapter all their own. Now all of the things that some of you know will be happening in the next chapter I post--but I didn't want them to be attached to this. I'll keep plugging away, and you guys should have what you want by tomorrow evening, if you know what I mean. LOL, think you can hold on until then?
Victoria L. Let me know what you think.

Chapter 11

To say that Brenda was speechless was an understatement. Her
nostrils flooded with the smell of sweet sugar cookies. Her recipe, she
recognized immediately. Brenda’s recipes were all over Jax’s kitchen and
even though she didn’t cook at lot for herself at home, she did cook
sometimes for Jax. She had always joked that she cooked far too much at
work as it was, and she didn’t feel the need to cook at home. Jax always
teased her about Jody being malnourished, but he was happy, healthy little
boy.
Everyone stood motionless, waiting for someone else to break the
silence. Victoria did.
“Momma, aren’t you going to come and decorate with us?”
“Mother?” Gwyneth asked softly. Brenda looked up at Gwyneth, her
face paled.
“Well, uh, no not exactly. I mean I am, but not biologically, I mean Jax
and I, we--”
“Come on,” Victoria said, pulling Gwyneth’s hand, “I’ll explain it all to
you.” Victoria looked exasperated, as she hated explaining her relationship
with Brenda. It was what it was. Most knew the truth, but whenever
someone didn’t, it was a strange story to tell. Once Gwyneth and Victoria
reached the kitchen, Victoria pulled herself up on a stool, her blonde ringlets
spilling to her waist. She kicked her legs back and forth in a swinging motion and dipped her finger into some icing. Gwyneth brought the cooling cookies
to the island in the middle of the kitchen.
“So,” she said, “tell me about your mother.”
“Which one?” Victoria said, unfazed.
“Uh, well, Brenda I meant to say.”

“Oh, that’s easy. See, when my real mommy died, Daddy made friends
with Brenda. Best friends,” Victoria emphasized, leaning forward. “And then
she was around so much that Jasmine and I started calling her mommy. See,
Jasmine doesn’t remember our real mom, Marian, because she died when
Jasmine was just born. So she thinks Brenda is her only mom, but I’m going
to tell her when she’s old enough to understand, like I am.”
“That’s very good of you,” Gwyneth said. “You’re a wonderful big
sister.” Victoria giggled a little bit.
“I’m good sometimes, but not when Jasmine cries and Daddy won’t
hold me because he has her. That’s when I hide her toys,” Victoria said with a
smile. Gwyneth nodded a bit, and then she and Victoria continued
decorating the cookies.
In the living room, Brenda still stood with her back to Jax.
“If you didn’t talk to Ms. Stuart about me and Daniel, then what did you
mean when you said you should have told me?”
“I meant about Gwyneth coming over to the house. I should have told
you, I know, because this is a big step for us.”
“Yeah well,” Brenda said, annoyance on her voice, “you’ve been a little
MIA lately.”
“Me?!” Jax asked incredulously. “What about you? You haven’t called at
all! I haven’t seen my son in days.”
“Whose fault is that?” Brenda asked.
“All right,” Jax said, “I’m not going to do this with you right now. Sit
down,” he said, pulling her onto the couch with him, “and tell me what this is
all about. Why did you barge in here, swinging accusations?” Brenda’s
reasons didn’t seem too important anymore.
“I’m sorry,” Brenda said, waving a hand and standing again. She
couldn’t stand to be in this house a moment longer. “You’re right, I shouldn’t
have come here like this, just barging in.” I should have used my key, she
thought, but didn’t say.
“Brenda, I understand what you’re going through. It must be a shock
to see Gwyneth here when you’re used to being the only woman here. It’s a
territory thing, right? I mean with women, you like to be in charge of
things--I get that.” Oh, he was really talking out of his head now, she thought
to herself.

“Look, Jax, it isn’t that at all. I was surprised to see Gwyneth here, but
this is your house, not mine, and you can have anyone here that you want.
You know that, and you know that you don’t need my permission.” Jax
nodded, accepting her rationalization. “Just tell me you didn’t say anything to
Ms. Stuart, because I think that she thinks I have no idea what I’m doing. She
thinks I’m just trying to keep this alive for Daniel and that I don’t want this for
myself. I just--I couldn’t take it if she got that idea from you, of all people.”
“Is that what you’re doing?” Jax asked. “Are you just keeping the Java
House alive for Daniel?”
“No!” Brenda said, forgetting that Jasmine was upstairs and Victoria and
Gwyneth were just in the other room. “Look, I do want to make this work.
Yes, it was Daniel’s dream, but it’s mine as well. I went to school to get by
business degree, I’ve got my business. I’m exactly where I want to be.”
“You’re sure about that?” Jax asked, standing very close to her. So
close, she could feel the warmth coming from his body. His hands held her
arms slightly at the elbows. His eyes were boring into her soul. He was
reading her, she knew it, and if she kept staring into his eyes, she would give
herself away. But give what away? Hadn’t she and Jax settled this long ago?
She tore her eyes away and sighed.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she said, leaning her head back
against his chest. His arms went around her protectively and he rested his
chin on top of her head. “So much is up in the air, you know, the Java House
is going to take off, Jody’s growing up, you’re moving on, and I just don’t
know if I’m ready for all of this. It seems that everyone and everything in my
life is moving on and I want to stay the same, you know? I don’t like change, I
don’t want change. Why can’t everything just go back to the way it was?” Jax
wondered how far back she wanted to go.

He held her a few more minutes, and when she turned around to face
him, she saw an unmistakable look of love in his eyes. It scared her a bit, but
she was somewhat relieved to see it. “Jax, I--”
“Shh,” he said. “It’s all right, I understand.” He leaned down to kiss her,
but not on the lips as she found herself hoping. On the cheek. Perilously
close to her mouth. He lingered there for just a moment. “Look, why don’t
you stay?” he said. “We’re not doing anything, just playing around, making a
mess in the kitchen.”
“No, I can’t, I’ve got to get back, I promised I wouldn’t stay long. So you
didn’t say anything, right?” she asked once more.
“I asked Ms. Stuart to give you a hand, and because she’s an old friend
of mine, I told her to go easy, and that you may need some extra time making
decisions. Apparently she took that to mean she was to make the decisions
for you. I’ll call her tomorrow and straighten all of this out, all right?” Brenda
nodded. “And if you’re not ready for this, it’s okay. We don’t have to do this
now. But we do have to strike while the iron is hot, Brenda. The world’s
ready for you. Will you go and meet it?” He sounded more excited about it
than she did.
“If you’ll come with me,” she said breathlessly.
“You got it,” he said. Just then, Victoria called him from the kitchen.
“Daddy! Come taste mine! You too, mom!” Brenda smiled weakly.
“Can I go get Jasmine?” Brenda asked, suddenly feeling the need to hold
her in her arms.
“Of course,” Jax said, waving a hand. Brenda did a little happy dance
and bounced up the stairs. Jax went into the kitchen. Victoria had icing on
her face, and Gwyneth was laughing at her as Victoria made faces. Jax was
taken aback at the picture they made, a beautiful little family. When Brenda came downstairs, she saw the same picture Jax did. Before, when she
pictured her family, it was herself, her son, Jax and his daughters. But now,
she saw herself, and her son, fading from view.

Jax turned immediately when he felt Brenda’s presence behind him. He saw
the look on her face and started to say something, but she put up a hand and
shook her head silently. The look in his eyes emplored her to let him say
more. Brenda squeezed Jasmine a little and kissed her cheek, rubbing the
lipstick off the child. Jasmine smiled and patted Brenda’s cheek. Brenda
blinked back the tears and sat Jasmine in Jax’s waiting arms.
“Victoria,” Brenda called, “I’m sorry sweetheart, but I’ve got to get back
to the Java House, I’m working tonight. I do so want to taste your cookies, so
will you save one for me, please?”
“You got it, babe,” Victoria said, using an expression she picked up
from Denise. Brenda smiled weakly and started to leave. Jax grabbed her
shoulder.
“I want you to call me,” he said. She knew if she didn’t, he’d knock
down her door. She nodded.
“I’ll be home in a few hours. I’m closing up tonight.” Jax reluctantly let
her go. When he turned back, Gwyneth was staring at him, running her
fingers through Victoria’s hair. He shrugged and pointed at Brenda.
“I don’t quite know how to explain that,” he said. She looked at him
thoughtfully, and then removed her apron.
“Perhaps this was too soon,” she said. She wiped her hands on the
dishtowel and moved towards the door of the kitchen. She stopped and
patted Jasmine on the back. “I did so love the time I’ve spent with you,” she
said softly. “And your girls as well.” Victoria looked up from the sprinkles
that she had drowned a cookie in.
“You’re not leaving, are you?” Victoria asked. Gwyneth looked at her
and tried to smile.
“Yes, dear, I’m afraid I am. But I shall see you at school tomorrow,
won’t I?”
“Yes, but--” Victoria jumped down off the stool and ran to Jax, “Daddy,
make her stay, please. We’re not done with the cookies, and she has to stay
for dinner, right? Come on, please!” Jax looked at Gwyneth and begged with
his eyes.
“All right,” she relented. “I shall stay for dinner.” Jax was relieved to
hear this, but he didn’t really know why he was so happy. He and Gwyneth
enjoyed a wonderful evening with Jasmine and Victoria. Jasmine spent most
of the evening in her father’s arms, trying bits of this and pieces of that, and
happily sucked on a cup of juice. When Jasmine’s eyelids began to droop and
Victoria was moving the leftover peas on her plate in long, slow circles, Jax
knew that they were ready for bed.
“I’m going to put these little ones to bed,” he said, getting up. Gwyneth
stood to.
“All right then, I’ll get my things--”
“No, no, stay!” Jax said, a little loudly. Gwyneth laughed merrily and
smiled.

“All right then, I’ll see you in a few. Good night, dears,” she said in that
lovely British accent. She kissed Jasmine lightly on the forehead and gave
Victoria a small hug as she went upstairs trailing her father and baby sister.
When Jax came back down stairs, Gwyneth was taking a sip of her red
wine.
“I’m sorry about this evening, with Brenda and all,” Jax started to say.
“Don’t you dare apologize for her,” Gwyneth said. “You should be
apologizing for yourself, Jasper.” She didn’t really like using the name ‘Jax’
and somehow ‘Jasper’ sound nice the way that she said it.
“I should apologize? For what?”
“For letting me believe that there was a chance for you and I,” she said
plainly. He looked a little shocked and taken aback.
“But there is a chance for us, Gwyneth. At least I thought there was. I
mean our first kiss was--” Gwyneth held up a hand and closed her eyes
briefly.
“It was wonderful, yes, but that’s not really what we’re debating.
Jasper, didn’t you see the look on Brenda’s face when she walked in here?”
“She was just surprised, that’s all. She was upset about something else,
honestly, and this was just the proverbial icing on the cake. You know how
women are,” he said, dismissively. “This is like a second home to Brenda, and
she feels she should know everything that goes on here--”
“Shouldn’t she?” Gwyneth asked, thinking how very ‘typical male’ of Jax
to assume that Brenda was jealous just because another woman was baking
cookies in her stove. “Jasper, Brenda was hurt because your life is changing
in significant ways, and you haven’t let her in on it.” She paused and smiled
softly. “Jasper, I’ve enjoyed every moment I’ve spent with you over the last
month. I have a wonderful time with you, no matter what we decide to do.
But what I cannot and will not do is date a man that’s involved with another
woman.” Jax opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She gently
tapped the bottom of Jax’s chin. “Close your mouth please, Jasper, you are
not a cod fish.”

Jax walked into the living room and plopped down on the couch.
“I don’t know what to say,” he mumbled.
“You don’t have to say anything at all, dear. I understand, really I do.
I’m not sure what your relationship with Brenda is, nor is it any of my
business, but I can see that you care so very much for one another, and it isn’t
fair of me to stand in the way of that.” Just then, Jax looked up at Gwyneth.
“Is that what you’re doing? Getting out of the way, because I have to
tell you, I’m not sure if that’s what I want.”
“Which is exactly my point,” Gwyneth said, gently pulling her hand
from his. She knew she was growing closer to him everyday, and she hoped
against hope that he would chose her after all. It was killing her to be this
noble, but she didn’t want to give her heart to Jasper Jacks and have it thrown
back in her face. Or in Jax’s gallant case, handed back gently with the
sincerest of regrets. She smiled and chuckled softly. “You must think I’m a
sentimental old fool, don’t you?”
“I would never think such a thing of you,” he said, looking deeply into
his eyes and seeing, if nothing, a true friend. “You’ve done more than you
know for me,” he added.
“Yes, and I’d like to do more, but not at the expense of my own heart.
Will you do something for me, Jasper?”
“Anything.”
“Well I don’t think you know me quite well enough to promise me
anything, but I would like a guarantee on what I’m about to ask you.”
“Shoot.”

“Don’t give up on the things that you want,” she said, on the off chance
that what he wanted might actually be her, “and don’t let those beautiful girls
miss out on the mother that God meant for them to have.” As she said this,
and Jax looked into her eyes, he thought for a moment that he saw Marian,
and not Gwyneth. “I believe that you and Brenda have a chance for
something wonderful, magic, star-crossed, and all of that. I have a lot of faith
in you, Jasper. I know that you can make things happen. Make this happen
for yourself. Make yourself happy. You do so much for everyone else, and
you sacrifice because you think it’s the right thing to do. Well, the people in
your life who love you want you to be as happy as they are, and that’s because
YOU make them happy. You’re no good to anyone if you’re not happy
yourself.” Jax chuckled softly. “I do sound like a bit of a greeting card, don’t
I?” He nodded. “Well,” she said, waving a hand, “you may attribute that to my
mother--she was a wonderful old sap. She cried at everything, she had advice
for everyone--but I did learn some valuable lessons on the way.”
“Like what?”
“Life is too short. Say what you mean, and mean what you do. It’s not
worth it to be unhappy a moment longer than necessary, and I happen to feel
that it is NEVER necessary. Will you do that for me, Jasper? Will you make
yourself happy?”
“I’ll do my best,” he said. They both stood and he pulled her into an
embrace. It was gentle, yet soothing, and all the while she was wondering
what on earth possessed her to let this man go. But she didn’t want him if she
couldn’t have all of his heart. If it meant kicking herself around the block, it
was going to be a long walk home.
“I should be going,” she said, pulling slowly from him. “Please tell
Victoria that I’ll see her in school tomorrow.” Looking at her now, Jax could
plainly tell that Gwyneth wasn’t being noble at all--it was killing her to let him
go.
“None of this has been fair to you,” he said. “And this--this isn’t fair to
you, either.”
“Sure it is,” she said. “We never had anything all that special.”
“Don’t sell yourself short,” Jax said sincerely. “You’ve done more than
you know, for all of us. And what we had, if anything, was special. Know
that, and know it always.” Gwyneth kissed him quickly and then rubbed the
lipstick off with her thumb.

“Who sounds like a greeting card now?” she asked, through her tears.
“Oh,” she said, turning her face and throwing on her shawl, “I should leave
now. Good night, Jasper. I’ll see you around sometime.”
“Indeed you will,” he said, not letting go of her hand. He squeezed it
for emphasis, and then he led her out the door. Watching her go, he
wondered how right she had been--or if the woman for him, had just been
standing there, and he let her go.

chp 12

Well, things are finally looking up for these two, huh? I want to really tell a realistic story here, about love relationships, of all kinds, so I'm glad that you guys have stuck with me to this point, and I hope you'll all continue to let me know what you think, and be patient with me. : ) The emails of support and followups have been wonderful, please continue to let me know what you think. It means so much.
Victoria L.

Chapter 12

When Brenda got back to the Java House, she found the usual
customers there, having their evening coffee. She spoke to a few of them,
and headed toward the back. Denise was in front of the cash register, and
Brenda was surprised to see her there. She figured Denise would have gone
home by now. Brenda waved, but Denise didn’t seem to notice her. Brenda
then breezed into the back room. Carly was sitting there, her head down on
the desk, sobbing bitterly. She had her back to the door, so Brenda couldn’t
see her face at first.
“Carly, what’s the matter?” Carly sat up immediately, wiping the tears
from her face and sighing deeply.
“Oh, uh, nothing, Brenda, it’s all right, I’m fine.”
“You don’t look fine,” Brenda said, coming to sit behind her. Carly
plastered on a fake smile.
“You look like hell, yourself,” Carly mused.
“Thanks,” Brenda chuckled. Then she noticed the papers on the desk,
sprawled out in front of Carly. Bills, lists, Carly’s random calculations. “What’s
all this?” Brenda asked, as Carly struggled to cover up the papers.
“It’s nothing, I said, it’s fine.”
“Carly,” Brenda said, stopping her moving hands and taking up a piece
of paper, “this is not ‘nothing.’ These are your bills. Carly,” Brenda said softly,
“you’re in major debt.”
“Yeah, tell me about it,” Carly said, taking the paper back. “But it’s
nothing for you to worry about.”
“Of course it is, I’m your friend. Tell me, what is going on? How did it
get this bad?”
“Well, it’s that silly little institution called education. See, you need that
to be successful in life. And it’s expensive, and see those little nice men with
green bow ties who loan out much needed money--they expect you to pay
them back.” Brenda knew Carly was being sarcastic, but it was a defense
mechanism. She wondered how she could put this without hurting Carly’s
feelings or pride.
“How long has it been this way, Carly?”
“About six months now,” Carly confirmed. “I mean before it was just
bill collectors every now and then, but you know, they gave me a few more
weeks, I paid them off.”

“Right,” Brenda said, “so what’s changed?”
“Well you remember that car accident I got into last Spring?” Brenda
nodded.
“Well car repairs have been huge, I had no idea it would cost that
much--I took the bus for three weeks, Brenda. It was too much, I had to have
my car--so I went ahead and paid what insurance didn’t cover--which was still
a lot.”
“Okay,” Brenda said, “so what else? Is there more?” Carly nodded.
“Yeah, uh,” she laughed a little, “last night, my lights were turned off.”
Brenda gasped. “And I have about three weeks before my phone is turned
off, too. You know what’s funny? I was up, studying for finals before we get
out for Thanksgiving, you know? It’s only three days away, Brenda.”
“Yeah, I know,” Brenda said. “But we’ll deal with that later. Tell me,
come on, what else is there?”
“Uh, it looks like I’m going to be paying student loans until my own
kids are ready to go into college. Brenda, I am strapped thin. I don’t know
what I’m going to do, what I’m going to pay first. I mean, I already took off
this semester, just so I could earn a little more money. But everything I can
make goes either to paying loans, or paying bills. I don’t have anything. I
mean, I know it sounds stupid, but I haven’t bought myself anything new in
over a year.”
“Well maybe you could move back in with Bobbie,” Brenda said gently.
Carly tossed her a ‘yeah right’ look.
“Brenda, I’m 23 years old. I’m three years away from becoming a
licensed physical therapist. And I’ve gotten a used to a little thing called
‘freedom.’ I am NOT moving back in with my mother. Plus she’s got Lucas to
worry about, his diabetes isn’t doing good lately--the last thing she needs is
someone else to take care of, you know? And I’m going to have to pay these
bills no matter where I’m staying.” Brenda was racking her brain trying to
figure out something.
“How are you on rent?” Brenda asked. Carly snickered at that.
“I’m three months behind, isn’t that funny? But Jason, my landlord,
he’s pretty lenient. I think I have a place to stay for a few more months at
least. And I think I’m going to be able to make rent, at least.”
“Carly,” Brenda said, shaking her head, “why didn’t you tell anyone?”
“I don’t know,” Carly said, “you’ve all been so busy, you with Java
House, and Jax with the kids and work as usual, and Denise has been having
some problems with Martin, and so I--”
“Wait, wait, back up. Did you say Denise and Martin were having
problems?” Carly nodded.

“For a few months now. She didn’t want to bother you with it, and I
didn’t want to bother you either. That’s why we didn’t really talk to you, you
know because of Jax and all.” Brenda waved a hand.
“Well, that’s all over now, I want to focus on you. I cannot believe that I
had no idea what was going on with my two best friends. I’m going to make
it up to you right now, though.” Brenda stood up and went over to a strong
box she kept in the bottom drawer of a metal filing cabinet. She counted out $2,000 quickly to herself. She turned, and put the money into Carly’s hand.
Carly shook her head.
“No way,” Brenda, I can’t let you do this.”
“Why not?” Brenda asked. “I own 60% of this place, and if I say you can
have $2,000 then you can. Here, take it, please.” Carly held the money and
thought a moment. Brenda knew what she was thinking. “This can be just
between the two of us, if you want.” Carly nodded, smiled weakly, and burst
into tears, hugging Brenda tightly. “Go get your lights turned on, Carly. You
can’t live in the dark, you know.” Carly pulled away from Brenda.
“Neither can you, you know.”
“What are you talking about?” Brenda asked.
“You know very well, so don’t pretend you don’t get what I’m saying.
Come on, Brenda, you and Jax. The two of you are made for each other, and I
frankly don’t feel like watching the two of you dance around it anymore.”
Brenda’s jaw dropped.

“Carly, I don’t think you really know what--”
“Don’t I?” she asked. “I’m one of your best friends. I see you when he
walks in here--you light up like a Christmas tree.”
“I do not,” Brenda said, blushing a bit.
“You certainly do. And Brenda, it’s okay, because he does the same
thing. Come on, you love him, admit it, and let us all have some peace. You’re
hell to work for when you’re horny.” Brenda’s jaw dropped and she punched
Carly in the arm playfully. “You know what I’m talking about,” Carly said.
“Come on, Brenda. You love him, he loves you, what’s the problem?”
“Uh, he doesn’t love me,” Brenda said, shaking her head, “I mean, not in
the way that you think. He loves me as his best friend, you know, the mom to
his kids--not life partner kind of love.”
“Well do you love him that way?” Carly asked. “I mean, do you want
him to be your life partner?”
“I honestly can’t imagine my life without him.”

‘I’m coming, I’m coming home to you.
I’m alive, I’m a mess.
I can’t wait to get home to you,
To get warm, warm and undressed.
There been changes beyond my dreams.
Everybody wants me to sing.
There been changes beyond my grasp.
Things aren’t sinking in.
So keep me in your bed, all day, all day.
Nothing heals me like you do.
Nothing heals me like you do.’

“Then go after him,” Carly said. “There’s no sense in sitting around
here, debating things. I really don’t believe that he doesn’t feel the same way
about you that you feel about him.”
“But how is that feeling, exactly? I mean, do I really want him in that
way, or am I just jealous that things aren’t the same anymore? Would I even
be raising this issue if there weren’t another woman in the picture?”

‘When somebody knows you well,
Well there’s no comfort like that.
When somebody needs you,
Well there’s no drug like that.
So keep me, keep me, in your bed,
All day, all day.
Nothing heals me like you do.
Keep me, keep me, in your bed,
All day, all day.
Nothing heals me like you do.’
“I’m not sure if I have all the answers for you,” Carly said. “I’m a
grownup who can’t pay her own bills. But I know love when I see it, and I
see it when you look at Jax. Now I know you’re scared, you told me, there’s
never been anyone but Daniel. And that’s all right. You had a life, you have a
child with the man. I’d be concerned if you weren’t devoted to him. But
Brenda, he’s a memory. He’s gone now, and you know as well as I do that he
would want you to be happy, not loyal and faithful to the end. You’re
honoring his memory by moving on and saying, ‘You took good enough care
of me, Daniel, to let me go, and move on. To survive, in your absence’.”

‘When I’m home, curled in your arms,
Then I’m safe again.
I’ll close my eyes, and sleep, sleep,
To the sound of London rain.
So keep me, keep me in your bed,
All day, all day,
Nothing heals me like you do.
Keep me, keep me, in your bed
All day, all day,
Nothing heals me like you do.
Nothing heals me like you do.
Nothing falls like London rain.
Nothing heals me like you do.
Nothing falls like London rain.
Nothing heals me like you do.
Nothing falls like London rain.
Nothing heals me like you do.’
“So,” Carly said, taking Brenda by the shoulders, “are you going to go
for it? I mean, are you at least going to try? For me, please? I have to have my
vicarious pleasures, you know.” Brenda laughed and hugged Carly.
“You really think I should? I mean, my God, a relationship with Jax--I’m
scared it’ll be too much.”
“Not if you love him,” Carly said, shaking her head. “It’ll never be too
hard as long as you love him.”
“I already know I love him as a best friend,” Brenda said, “but,” her
voice got quieter, almost to a whisper, “I really think I can try and love him as
more.”
“Well it’ll sure be fun trying,” Carly said. Brenda smiled.
“You’re right. Okay, deep breath, I’m gonna give it a shot.”
“You are?! You are?!” Brenda and Carly jumped up and down and
squealed, and hugged each other.
“My goodness,” Brenda said, “you remember when we said we’d never
act that way?”
“Yeah, but love makes you brake all sorts of promises,” Carly said. She
had no idea how right she was.
Brenda left the Java House late that night after making plans to host
parties the evening before and evening after Thanksgiving in a few days. She
really was glad to be closed on Thanksgiving. Last year, she was one of the
few places open, at Jax’s suggestion, and while they made a killing, as he said
they would, Brenda was exhausted, and she, Denise and Jody had pizza and
watched old movies on TV. Not ideal, and although it had been fun, Brenda
wanted to go all out and have a family dinner. Lois, Jax’s sister, was coming,
Denise, maybe Martin, Carly, and a guest, and Jax and his girls, hopefully. As
Brenda walked to her car, she came up with the perfect excuse for stopping
by Jax’s house. Plans were basically finalized, but as she drove, she came up
with a few things that she could claim she’d forgotten.

But then she thought a moment. Why would she have to lie? This was
Jax, her best friend, confidante, the person who knew her better than she
knew herself. She never had to be embarrassed around him. A smile grew on
her face as she pulled into his driveway. A smile that she could do nothing to
curb. She checked herself in the mirror before she got out, something she
never did. She got out and walked to the door, half walking, half running.
She knocked swiftly, three times, before she could talk herself out of it. Her
heart was beating so fast, she thought she was going to have a heart attack.
She also knew that she had the stupidest grin and a dopey look on her face.
She hoped she didn’t look too silly when he opened the door.
Jax came down the stairs, looking at his watch. He’d had to end a
conversation with Jerry to come down and get the door. It crossed his mind
that it could be Gwyneth, but when he opened it and saw Brenda, all
thoughts of any woman, as well as coherent thought, went straight out of his
head.
‘Did you ever love somebody,
So much that the earth moved?
Did you ever love somebody,
even though it hurt to?
Did you ever love somebody,
Nothing else your heart could do.
Did you ever love somebody who never knew?’

“Hey,” Brenda said, breathlessly.
“Hey,” Jax said, pulling her inside. Brenda was about to say that she
didn’t know why she was here, but then she remembered her excuse, and felt
she had to use it. He was looking at her rather expectantly.
“I, uh, I came to talk to you about Thanksgiving,” she said. “You know
it’s only a few days away, and I wanted to know if you guys were joining us.”
“You came to ask me that at 10:30 at night, after you’ve been working
all day?”
“Well why else would I stop by?” Brenda asked, her eyes falling to the
floor. Jax stepped closer to her, and gently lifted her chin to meet his gaze.
“I have no idea,” he whispered. “Why don’t you tell me?”
‘Did you ever lay your head down,
on the shoulder of a good friend?
And then had to look away, somehow,
Have to hide the way you felt for them?
Have you ever prayed the day would come,
You’d hear them say they feel it too?
Did you ever love somebody who never knew?’

“Jax, I--I’ve been thinking, and after the way I came in here before, I--I
didn’t have the right. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” he said, pulling her into his arms. “If you hadn’t, I’d never
know how you really feel about me.”
“You know?” Brenda asked, feeling her heart beat even faster now, if
that was possible.
“Of course I know,” he said. “Did you really think you could hide it
from me forever? I’ve been feeling it too, Brenda, whatever this is that’s
going on between us, it’s electric, and I know you feel it too, otherwise, you
wouldn’t let me touch your hair like this,” he said, as he ran his fingers
through her dark tresses, making her eyes close. “And your skin wouldn’t be
this soft,” he said, tracing patterns on her cheeks and neck, “and,” he said,
nudging her eyes open, “your eyes wouldn’t be begging me to kiss you right
now.”
“Is that what my eyes are doing?” Brenda asked.
“Definitely.”
‘How do you do it?
Well, you know I’d understand.
I could, I would,
more than anybody can.
Did you ever love somebody?
So much that the earth moved?
Did you ever love somebody,
even though it hurt to?
Did you ever love somebody,
Nothing else your heart could do.
Did you ever love somebody,
like I love you?
Like I love you.
Like I love you.’
Brenda barely had time to realize Jax was going to kiss her, before he
did. Never, in her wildest dreams had she thought it would or could be like
this. His mouth roamed over hers, delicately, softly, and with agonizing
slowness. He tasted like icing, she thought to herself. His hands had been
cupping her face, but they fell now to her shoulders, to pull her even closer, if
possible, to his body. His tongue traced the seam of her mouth lightly, and
she opened willingly for him. He groaned as he finally got what he realized
he’d been wanting from the first day he laid eyes on her. Her. He was getting
her. Finally.

Her arms went up around his neck, and he pulled her into an embrace.
Without thinking, her legs went up around his waist. His hands lighted
momentarily on the backs of her thighs, sending shivers up her spine. She
deepened the kiss then, and surprised him with her aggression. She moaned
into the kiss and let her fingers intertwine in his golden hair.
“Jax,” she sighed, “I don’t think--”
“Shh,” he said between kisses, “don’t think.” She nodded mindlessly
and gave in to her passion. He carried her to the couch and laid her down
softly. He stopped briefly to look into her eyes, and when he did, he saw
reckless abandon there that fueled his fire for her even more. He took off his
shirt and Brenda was taken aback by the sheer perfection of his body. The
muscles in his arms rippled as he cast the shirt on the floor and took off her
coat. She had on a pink blouse, and underneath it, a thin white tank top that
did little to hide her arousal. She leaned back and held her arms out for him.
“I never thought I’d see the day,” he whispered, before he came down on top
of her, assailing her with kisses. Brenda thought she’d drown in the passion
of it all. His touch burned trails all down her body, as he lifted the tank top to
reveal a barely there white lace bra. “Brenda,” he said huskily as he unclasped
the bra, “I never imagined you could be so beautiful.” She smiled weakly, and
certainly wasn’t prepared for the tender assault he was causing as he brought
her left nipple into his mouth, and sucked, gently, causing her to cry out. He
immediately went to her mouth and kissed it, quieting the sound. His tongue
plunged deep into her mouth and sent her to dizzying heights.

Brenda couldn’t quite remember where she was, or how she had
gotten there as Jax left her mouth and trailed hot, sweet kisses down her
body. When he reached her belt and began to undo it, her hands clasped
gently over his.
“I want you so much,” she said gently, holding his face in her hands.
“And I want this, more than anything, but we haven’t said anything, we
haven’t talked--”
“What is it with women and talking?” he asked, as he unhooked her belt
and pulled off her pants. She let him, and then he pulled her into his lap. Her
breasts rubbed against his chest slightly, and he had to really focus and pull
back a bit to understand her. Brenda’s voice came floating into his ears like
fairy music, and he stared into her eyes, being further cast into her spell.
“You haven’t heard a word I’ve said, have you?” she asked. He chuckled
to himself.
“I admit, love, I haven’t been listening, but your body is definitely
speaking.” His tongue made slow circles around her nipples, and for a
moment, she couldn’t speak. She gathered his hair in her hands and pulled
his head back. He smiled at her sexily. “Jax, if you keep this up,--”
“That’s the idea,” he said, taking the opportunity to kiss her. She smiled
again and put a delicate hand over his mouth.
“You’re insatiable,” she said, shaking her head. “Listen, we have to talk
about this first. I really don’t want to rush headlong into things. There are
people to consider. And think about where we are right now,” Brenda added.
Jax couldn’t believe he let his emotions get out of control like this, but his
girls were asleep upstairs.

“It’s a big house,” he said, standing up, with her still in his arms. He sat
back down on the couch after righting himself and held her in his lap.
“That wasn’t exactly what I meant,” Brenda said, “though that is
something to consider.”
“Why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you, love?” Brenda couldn’t
believe she was saying this, so she closed her eyes and just said it.
“I--I’ve never been with anybody, just Daniel, only Daniel. I don’t know
how to be with--Jax, Daniel’s the only man I’ve ever made love to, and I’m sure
there were others before Marian, in fact I’m sure there were, you’ve told me a
lot of stories, and there’s probably been Gwyneth and others since Marian--”
Jax placed a kiss on Brenda’s lips to stop her torrent of words.
“Brenda, first of all, I understand your feelings about Daniel. It’s to be
expected, and I’m honored that you would give yourself to me. Making love
is a precious thing, and you’re right, we shouldn’t rush this, we have all the
time in the world. Also, to answer your question, or rather, to correct you, I
have NOT been with anyone since Marian’s passing. Yes, there were others
before her, but she had others before me. I certainly didn’t want to hear
about it, but I could accept that. And,” he added, lifting her face so she could
see the sincerity in his eyes, “Gwyneth and I never made love. We came close,
yes a few times, but we both knew that it wasn’t right.”
“What about Gwyneth,” Brenda said. “I mean, you’re not the type to
just drop a woman, even if you were interested in someone else. Something
must have happened, right? I mean, you said goodbye?”
“We said goodbye,” Jax nodded. “I mean, I honestly didn’t want to. I
really think I could have been happy with Gwyneth if you never came
around. But, I’m so very glad that you did, because I know that nothing and
no one could ever satisfy me the way that you do.” He pulled her face down
for another kiss, this time, it wasn’t hot or scorching. It was sweet, and slow,
and searching, as if trying to memorize her before she faded from him. The kiss ended in several short ones, and Brenda sighed, keeping her eyes closed
after it ended.
“Brenda, I---” She put a finger on his lips. She didn’t think she could
leave him if he said it, and right now, she needed to go, not forever, but for a
little while.
“Jax, I’ve been so wrong, and so blind.”
“You’ve been saying goodbye to your husband,” he amended. “Just as I
said goodbye to Marian. In little ways. Ways so subtle that I hardly realized I
was doing it until it was done.”
“Can you ever forgive me for taking so long to realize what was in both
our hearts?”
“Of course,” Jax said, kissing her gently.
“I’m not sure I’m ready for everything you’re asking,” she said, “and I
don’t know if I can give you everything you need, but I know I’d really like to
try.”
“That’s all I want, Brenda, is a chance, a chance to be with you, and to--”
Brenda knew what he was about to say, and she didn’t want to hear the
words---not yet, so she kissed him, so deeply and fully that he forgot he was
about to say anything at all.
“I have to go,” she said, getting out of his lap and putting on her bra.
He watched her a moment, a smile playing on his lips. She put on her tank
top and looked around for her blouse. He held it on two fingers, and dangled
it in front of her. She grabbed for it, but he held it slightly out of her reach.
“Come on, Jax,” she pleaded.
“Promise me you’ll come back,” he said.
“Tonight?” she asked.
“Yes, I mean, I assume that the reason you’re leaving is to relieve the
baby-sitter who is watching Jody, right?”
“Right,” Brenda said, not following his line of thinking.
“Well drop him off at Denise’s or Carly’s, or bring him back here and he
can sleep in Jasmine’s room, and then we can finish what we started.” Brenda
smiled at him, and allowed him to pull her into his arms again for another
tantalizing kiss.

“Well,” she said, “all right, but Carly’s place is out of the question, I’ll
explain later, but I can take her to Denise’s. As far as I know, Martin’s at his
own place tonight, so she can watch him for us. But she’s on the other side of
town, so it’ll take me a few minutes. Will you wait for me?” she asked
playfully.
“You know I will,” he said, looking at her seriously. “Brenda, I know
you don’t want to talk about it right now, and I won’t say the words, but I
really think this can work out.”
“I want it to work too, Jax, and I’ll try. I’ll do my best. That’s all I can say
or give right now, but--”
“That’s all I’m asking. Go and take care of Jody, and then come back
here, to me. Will you do that?”
“I will,” Brenda said, smiling prettily and kissing him on the cheek once
more, before gathering her things and leaving.
“All right,” he said, sighing. “All right.”
Brenda took Jody from the baby-sitters, and buckled him into his
booster seat. She drove carefully but quickly over to Denise’s place. She
didn’t see Martin’s car, so she felt okay to ask Denise to watch Jody. Brenda
knocked on the door, but got no answer. She knew Denise usually listened to
headphones at night, the sounds of whales, or the rain forest, or
thunderstorms, so she decided to use her key. Little did Brenda know, there
was a storm brewing inside. She opened the door, loaded down with Jody,
his overnight bag, and the teddy bear and baseball cap Jax had given him that
he wouldn’t be without. Brenda started to call out, but when she heard the
screaming, she stopped dead in her tracks.
“I can’t believe you, you stupid b*tch! I told you, no matter how late I
get home, went I get here, I want dinner on the table, ready and waiting!”
“It’s right here in the oven,” Denise screamed, through her tears. “What
difference does it make?!” Martin raised his hand and slapped Denise across
the face, so hard, it made her fall to the ground.

“I hate this food!” He screamed at her. “Why didn’t you make what I
told you?”
“They didn’t--have any at the grocery store,” Denise sobbed. “I told you
I’d make something else.” She was cowering in the corner, and Brenda
couldn’t believe her ears.
“I don’t want anything else! I don’t want it now,” he screamed,
throwing the food onto the floor. “It’s garbage now, Denise, just like you are!
Now I want you to get down there and clean it up and the only one around
here that’s going to eat that garbage is you, Denise! Do you hear me?! DO you
hear me?!”
“Yes,” Denise cried, shielding herself from Martin. Brenda’s face was
twisted up in pain as she listened to the fight. She held Jody close to her and
quietly closed the door. When she was sure Martin wouldn’t come to the
door, she quickly got into the car, tears streaming down her face, buckled up
Jody, and sped away into the night.

music credits "London Rain {Nothing Heals Me Like You Do} by Heather Nova and "Did You Ever Love Somebody" by Jessica Simpson both found on the Dawson's Creek Soundtrack and on Heather's CD Siren and Jessica's CD, Sweet Kisses.

chp 13

Hey all! I had intended to wait and post this later, but you guys were so sweet in asking for it, I had to give in. : ) Also, I have received a multitude of comments and emails on my other story, and I have to thank all of you for that. I'm sorry if I don't get to respond to each and everyone, but I read them all, and respond to all that I can, so I thank everyone who has sent an email or posted a reply. I can't tell you what it means. But on with the story, right?
Victoria L.

Chapter 13

“What’s wrong mama?” Jody asked Brenda. She glanced at her son as
she clutched the steering wheel.
“Nothing, honey.”
“Why didn’t we see Denise? I wanted to see her.”
“Because, Jody, it didn’t work out tonight honey, all right? Please, try
and take a little nap for mommy, all right, we’ll be home soon.”
“I want my daddy,” Jody said, his temper coming through in his voice.
Brenda groaned to herself and then realized that there was no where else that
she’d rather be.
“That’s a good idea, honey. We’ll go see your daddy.” Brenda drove
around for a few more minutes, trying to gather her wits about her. She
pulled into Jax’s driveway and sighed, resting her forehead against the
steering wheel, her knuckles shock white. She sat up and took Jody to the front door. Jax opened the door with a smile, but as soon as he saw Brenda,
he knew something was wrong.
“What’s happened?” he asked, pulling them both inside. In the back of
her mind, Brenda was glad that Jax had on a pair of blue jeans and a black
T-shirt.
“I want to put him down first,” Brenda said. Jax looked at her
quizzically for a moment, and then nodded.
“I’ll take him to his room.” He reached for Jody, who went willingly
into his arms, already starting to fall asleep. Once Jax came back downstairs,
he was really worried. Brenda had discarded her jacket but as she paced the
floor, she rubbed her arms frantically.
“I really shouldn’t have kept him out this late,” Brenda said, looking
upstairs through the ceiling to where she guessed Jody’s bed would be.
“He’s fine,” Jax said, putting a hand on Brenda’s shoulder. “Tell me,” he
said. “What’s got you so spooked?” Brenda stared into Jax’s blue eyes and
sighed.

“I cannot believe this,” she said. She held Jax’s hand and pulled him
down on the couch beside her. She curled up in a ball and nestled herself in
his arms. “I’m not sure I can make myself say it,” she whispered. Jax stroked
her hair and waited patiently for her to continue. “I--I went to drop Jody off
at Denise’s, you know, so I could come back here, and--” Brenda’s voice began
to shake with fear and crack with raw emotion. “He--Martin--I--he hit her, Jax.
He hit her so many times. He was beating her,” Brenda said, tucking her arms
even further into herself.
“What?!” Jax asked, holding Brenda at eye level. “Martin? Denise? Did
you call the police?” Jax said, getting up.
“No, and I’m not sure we should,” Brenda said, standing up and putting
a hand on Jax’s forearm.
“Brenda, where is the debate here? He was beating her. No man
should ever put a hand on a woman.”
“I just meant,” Brenda amended, “that if the police can’t do anything,
and if Denise won’t press charges--which I’m not sure she will, she loves
Martin so much--then it would only anger him more, and I don’t want to
endanger Denise any further.”
“Brenda, I see your point, but this man is dangerous. We cannot just let
this go.”
“I agree. That’s why I’m going to call Carly and have her come in early
tomorrow morning. When Denise gets there, I’ll tell her what I know, and
what I heard.”
“And then what? What is she supposed to do with that, Brenda?”
“Maybe she’ll leave him--maybe I can convince her to leave, press
charges, something--I don’t know, Jax, I don’t have all the answers!” Brenda
was shaking now, and Jax regretted challenging her.
“All right, all right, all right,” he soothed, pulling her into his arms.
“There now, love. We’ll figure something out, all right?”
“It’s not just that he was hitting her,” Brenda said, shaking her head and
practically sobbing. “He wasn’t just hitting her, he was humiliating her!”

Brenda fell to her knees and her body was racked with sobs. “I swear,” Jax
said through gritted teeth as he held Brenda, “If I ever see that man, I’ll kill
him myself.”

The next morning, Brenda and Carly sat at a table in the middle of the
Java House. They had taken the chairs down from the table they sat at, but
didn’t bother putting the rest of them down. They had put up a sign outside
announcing that they would be opening an hour later than usual. Brenda
couldn’t have cared less about her customers now, though. She just wanted
to do her best to convince Denise to leave her husband.
“What are you going to say?” Carly asked, her eyes darting back and
forth between the door and Brenda’s sad face. Brenda noticed her
apprehension.
“It’s okay,” Brenda said, putting a hand on Carly’s. “You don’t have to
talk if you don’t want to. I’ll say whatever needs to be said, you just make sure
Denise knows that you’re here for her. Can you do that?” Brenda asked.
Carly nodded. “You know,” Brenda said, sipping some coffee, “in group, Jax
sometimes said that death takes on different forms. I never really understood
that until last night.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well think about it--this has probably been going on for months--and
the Denise that we know and love--the spunky, tell-it-like-it-is friend that we
can always count on--she’s died somehow, you know? I mean being hit like
that--” Brenda shook her head and set her jaw line. “I’ll never get the picture
out of my head,” Brenda said. “Never, as long as I live.”
“But I thought this only happened to married, weak women,” Carly
said. “I mean Martin’s Denise’s boyfriend. Why can’t she just leave?”
“People have different reasons for staying,” Brenda said. “I just hope
that none of the reasons Denise has will hold up once I get through with her.”
“You seem to be doing a little better,” Carly said, rubbing her eyes that
were red from crying. “What’s going on with you?”
“Oh,” Brenda said, smiling softly. “I guess Jax and I made some
headway, last night--before I went to Denise’s--” Brenda was about to tell Carly
what had happened when Denise came in, dark sunglasses covering her dark,
yet bruised skin. Brenda looked up, and Denise came to stand in front of the
table.
“What’s going on?” Denise asked. Brenda squeezed Carly’s hand and
looked up at Denise.

“We just found out some really sad news about a friend,” Brenda said.
“Oh, is there anything I can do?” Denise asked, pulling down a chair
and sitting. It always was like Denise to think of someone else before herself,
Brenda thought.
“You can start,” Brenda said, “by taking off those sunglasses.” Denise
looked back and forth between Brenda and Carly for a few seconds. Her
mind was racing--how could they possibly know? Maybe she’d done a good
enough job with the makeup this morning. Besides, her skin was dark, so maybe it wouldn’t show up as well. Denise brought up a shaky hand to
remove the sunglasses and lay them gently on the table, a sign of defeat.
“Oh,” Carly said, covering her mouth with her hands. She closed her
eyes as tears sprung from the corners and bounced lightly down her cheeks.
Denise took a deep breath, and sighed.
“I guess it shows huh?” Brenda hadn’t been prepared for what she saw.
Both of Denise’s eyes were bruised and blackened. Her left eye was
practically swollen shut.
“Denise,” Brenda said with urgency, “how could you let him do this to
you?!”
“You don’t understand,” Denise said, putting up a hand.
“Well then explain it to me!” Brenda said, standing up and beginning to
pace, holding her arms around her waist. “Explain to me how my best friend,
the strongest woman I know in this world, the toughest, the most beautiful--”
Brenda was standing behind Denise’s chair now-- “how could you let him do
that to you?”
“It hasn’t always been this way,” Denise said in a shaky voice, trying
desperately to cling to any and every excuse.
“Once is more than enough, Denise,” Carly said, reaching out and
covering Denise’s hand with her own.
“Who else knows about this?” Denise asked, getting some of her
reserve back.
“What difference does that make?” Brenda asked, irritated that Denise
was either pretending to, or actually missing her point altogether.
“Just tell me please, Brenda. Who else knows, and how did you find
out?”
“Jax knows,” Brenda sighed, coming to sit in front of Denise. “And no
one else besides me and Carly--and Martin, Denise. MARTIN knows what he’s
doing to you, and he knows it’s wrong, and SO do YOU.”

“I don’t need a lecture on relationships from you,” Denise said quietly,
not really wanting to argue with Brenda.
“Why are you doing this to yourself?” Brenda asked. “You’re a beautiful
woman. You can have any man you want--how many dates are you asked out
on every week here at Java House? A dozen or more? You cannot tell me that
Martin deserves you more than any one of the nice guys that come through
here every day.”
“Well why don’t you go out with one of them?!” Denise asked, getting
up and walking to the back of the Java House. When she came back out
moments later, her coat was gone, and her purse, and she had on the thin
aprons they all wore. She ignored Brenda and Carly, marched over to the
‘closed’ sign, and reversed it, and then began taking the chairs down,
slamming them on the ground harshly. Brenda marched right back over to
the door and turned the sign once again, and threw the lock back in place. “I
do NOT want to talk about this anymore,” Denise said, moving about the Java
House, preparing for the morning customers.

“Well we’re damn well going to talk about this, Denise,” Brenda
insisted. “Look at you, it’s you, the real Denise--you’re getting angry about
this, as you should be. You know you don’t deserve this.”
“Why don’t you just stay out of this, please, Brenda.” Denise said,
turning her back to hide the tears that were flowing. Brenda placed a hand
on Carly’s shoulder for strength.
“You know that we can’t do that,” Carly spoke up. “We love you, and
we don’t want to see this happen to you. You’re better than this.”
“I love him,” Denise said shakily. “And he loves me too.”
“What kind of man who loves you hits you?” Brenda asked, anger on
her voice. She knew she wasn’t helping, Denise needed a friend, some
support. But Brenda already knew she could not watch Denise go back into
that relationship.
“I don’t know what else to do,” Denise said, sitting down, her shoulders
slumping. “I can’t leave now, not now.”
“Why not now?” Brenda asked. “What’s happened? How long as he
been doing this?”
“For a few months. He never used to be this way, I swear, Brenda, he
was so romantic. Don’t you remember? All the hearts and flowers--he used to
be so romantic.”
“Well he’s not that way now,” Brenda said gently, sitting beside Denise
and putting a hand on her shoulder. “And as much as you love him, you know
that this is not healthy, don’t you? I mean, you know that he wouldn’t put his
hands on you as a sign of affection, or attention. It’s wrong, Denise.”
“Don’t talk to me like a child, Brenda. I’m not some psychotic case. I
know that it’s wrong. But my mother told me that once you’re in a
relationship, you’re in it for the long haul. You don’t quit.” Brenda was about
to open her mouth and respond, but Carly stopped her. She got up, and
moved to sit on the other side of Denise.
“Denise, what’s changed for you? Why do you feel this way now? You
always told me how your mother told you that women should be strong, and
not depend on men for anything. Why do you think you need Martin, or any
man, so very much?” Denise looked down, and began to cry.
“Because I’m pregnant,” she sobbed. “And it’s Martin’s.”

“Oh my God,” Brenda said. She couldn’t believe it.
“I know,” Denise said, “I was as shocked as you are. I’m 3 months.”
“Well that does it,” Brenda said. “I don’t care if you need to hear this or
not, Denise, but you cannot go back to him now.”
“It’s just the alcohol,” Denise said.
“Will you listen to yourself?!” Brenda asked. “ ‘It’s just the alcohol’?!
Denise, it is not just the alcohol! The man is sick! And he’s going to end up
killing both you and your baby!” Just then, Denise stood up and faced Brenda,
rage in her voice.
“I would NEVER let that happen!”
“I don’t see how you could stop it if you’re dead yourself,” Brenda
countered, “which is exactly what you’ll be if you spend another night in the
house with that man.”
“Okay, okay,” Carly said, “we all just need to calm down, that’s all.”
“She’s right,” a voice said. Just then, Jax came through the door. “I hope
you don’t mind,” he said. “I used my key.”
“No,” Brenda sighed, coming into his arms and putting them around his
waist. “I’m so glad you’re here.” Brenda drank in the smell of Jax, his
closeness comforting her. Denise kept her back turned. Jax kissed Brenda
on the top of the head and squeezed her hand. He looked to her for
reassurance, and then asked Denise to turn around. When she did, Jax almost
cried.
“I’ll kill him myself,” Jax said, “where is he?”
“No!” Denise said. “You can’t.”
“Can’t I? I won’t let him get away with putting his hands on you,
Denise, I won’t.”

“I’m going home,” Denise said, “I can’t deal with all of this.”
“No you’re not,” Jax said, putting a hand on her shoulders. Denise was
about to argue, but Carly stepped in again.
“Look, I’m really tired of playing peacemaker here, but I have a
solution--”
“The only solution is for her to leave,” Brenda interrupted. Carly put
up a hand.
“Denise, why don’t you stay at Brenda’s?”
“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea,” Denise said, thinking of Jody.
“Jody and Brenda can stay at my place,” Jax said. “Martin doesn’t know
where she lives, and we can have the locks changed this afternoon on your
place. What do you say?”
“I’ll think about it,” Denise said, “but right now, can we please just talk
about something else?” Brenda opened her mouth once again to argue, but
Jax put a hand on the small of her back to silence her.
“All right,” he said, “I’ll tell you what--you agree to go back to my place
now, and get some rest, the girls are with the sitter, I’ve taken off work, I can
help out today, and Martin won’t come knocking on my door. If he does, you
just page me, I can be there in five minutes. We’ll work out later where you
stay tonight, okay? Fair enough?”
“Fair enough,” Denise agreed.
“All right,” Carly said, realizing that Jax and Brenda needed some time
to talk, “I’ll drive you, and I’ll be back here in a half hour, that good?”
“That’s fine,” Brenda said, walking stoically into the back of Java House,
not bothering to say goodbye to Denise. Denise’s eyes followed after her,
tears flowing.
“Try and explain it to her for me,” she begged of Jax.
“I’m not sure I can make her understand,” Jax said. “Because I don’t
understand myself, how you can do this. But it’s not my job to judge you
right now,” Jax amended. “I just want to be a friend. But Denise, I’m telling
you, if you go back to Martin, I can’t be held responsible for what I do. I’m
not letting him get away with it.” Denise nodded and hugged him tightly for a
moment. Carly put a hand on Jax’s forearm.

“If anyone can explain it to Brenda,” she said softly, “you can.” Jax
kissed Carly on the cheek, and held the door open for Denise and Carly as
they left. Once they were gone, Jax went over to the bar and sat on a stool.
“It’s safe to come out now,” Jax said softly. “They’ve gone.” Brenda
came out, looking at the floor, and put her arms out for Jax. He took her into
his arms and sighed, holding her tightly. She cherished the feel of his arms
around her. “I don’t know what I’d do if it was you,” he said, shaking his head.
“Thank God it isn’t you.”
“We can’t let this happen to her,” Brenda said, shaking her head. “I
cannot let this happen to my best friend.”
“I agree,” Jax said, “But we have to be careful with this, it’s a delicate
situation. And I know you’re angry, but you have to go easy on Denise. This is
hard enough for her, and if you criticize every decision she makes and shoot
down every suggestion of hers for a solution other than leaving Martin, you’re
only going to alienate her.”
“Wait a minute,” Brenda said, pulling out of Jax’s embrace. “Are you
suggesting that they can work things out? Is that what you’re saying to me
right now?” Jax didn’t answer, and Brenda took his response for an
affirmative once. “I do NOT believe you, Jasper! Didn’t you see her face
when she came in here?! She couldn’t SEE out of one of her eyes! There is no
room to work things out!”
“First of all,” Jax said, taking her hands in his and pulling her to him, “I
did not say that they could or should work things out---but Denise doesn’t
need to have to make any decisions about what’s best for anyone but herself
right now, and if she continues to worry about losing her best friend, then
she’ll lose her focus, and it’s going to make the hardest decision of her life, to
leave Martin, even harder.”
“Well,” Brenda said, thinking about what he was saying, “I suppose
you’re right. But you’re wrong if you think that Denise is the only person she
has to worry about.”
“What do you mean?” Jax asked.
“She’s pregnant,” Brenda replied. “Three months, it’s Martin’s. She
didn’t really say so, but I think it’s because of the baby--she blamed it on the
alcohol.” Jax got up, clearly annoyed.

“What kind of sick b*stard would hit a woman when she’s pregnant?!”
Jax asked. He tried to calm himself by taking deep breaths, but the bile kept
rising in his throat. “Where is he, Brenda?”
“I don’t know,” Brenda said, begging to be scared of Jax’s temper.
“Yes you do, where is he?”
“I don’t know,” Brenda said again.
“Oh come on, sure you do. Where is he always?” Brenda just stared at
Jax, scared out of his mind at what he must be thinking. “Fine,” Jax said,
moving past Brenda and into the back. He opened the door in the filing
cabinet marked ‘Employee Files’.
“Jax, what are you doing?” Brenda asked, struggling in vain to pull on
his arm. He snatched Denise’s file and held it out of Brenda’s reach. It only took him a glance to find Martin’s workplace and address before Brenda
snatched it from his hands.
“What are you going to do?” she asked, standing in front of the door.
“I’m going to teach our friend what it’s like to get his face busted in!”
Jax said, gently shoving Brenda out of the way.
“Jax, you’re not going to help anyone by getting yourself arrested!” Jax
ignored Brenda as he continued to the front of the store. He turned back.
“Just what are the police going to do? They haven’t been any help to
her so far!”
“That’s because she hasn’t chosen to include them before now. Jax,
come on, please, don’t do this, I don’t want you to get hurt.” Jax could hear
the apprehension on Brenda’s voice. He turned back once more and kissed
her so passionately, it made her toes curl. It ended in several short pecks. As
Brenda wiped the lipstick from Jax’s lips with her thumb, he rubbed his
hands down her arms.

“I’m going to be fine, Brenda,” Jax assured her. “Do you doubt my
manly strength?” he joked.
“No,” Brenda mused, “But the police are not going to find this very
funny.”
“I can’t let this go,” Brenda. “I can’t. I’ll be back shortly, all right? After I
teach our friend a few things.” With that, Jax stormed out, Brenda staring
after him.