.Promises, Promises (chapt 35) (JB)

by Sydney L. on January 09, 19100 at 20:57:50:

Hey everyone!

WOW!!! It's been a REALLY long time on this one! This chapter just 'struck' me this weekend! Hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think...your feedback is ALWAYS appreciated!!!

Hugs,
Sydney
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~ chapter 35 ~

Jax's eyes locked on Jerry's as he tried to gauge the amount and type of emotion he saw there. He'd bet his fortune it was guilt…and it was overflowing. Maybe even… "It was a simple question, Jerry. I mean, you were the one who stayed with Miranda after the explosion. You kept in contact with her all of these years. If you could keep a secret like that who knows what else you might know. Did you ever stop to think if you feel that you're being accused of something maybe there's something for you to be accused of…"

"I am so tired of this…this constant lack of trust. I'm trying to help you here and all I keep getting is my past mistakes thrown back in my face no matter how many times I apologize. In fact, you know what?" Jerry asked as he jumped off the couch. "I've had about all I can take of you tonight." He turned to Frisco with a nod. "If you'll excuse me, I've got to get out of this…" Jerry turned back to Jax with a pointed look. "…this judgement hell."

Jerry slammed out of the door as Jax turned a silent, even gaze back to Frisco. Jax swallowed hard then asked a question he wasn't sure he wanted the answer to. "So when did it happen?"

"What?" Frisco asked not sure what Jax was getting at.

"When did my brother sleep with my wife?"

Frisco's expression never wavered though his eyes took on a guarded look. "What do you mean?"

Jax sighed as he leaned forward and locked eyes with Frisco. "I mean…when did Jerry sleep with Miranda? Was it during those lost years when she was supposedly in recovery? While she and I were together? When? Look, you can tell me. It's ok. I don't love her anymore. Hell, I can't even stand being in the same room with her. And I really don't care that it happened. As far as I'm concerned, it's all ancient history. I just need to know if it'll compromise Jerry's loyalty to me in any way. I will not risk Brenda's life, or Jordan's, by putting blind faith in my brother."

Frisco shook his head in amazement. "I would have thought you'd be more upset…"

Jax shrugged his shoulders before standing to move toward the fireplace. "Like I said, I don't love her. And I know Jerry well enough to know he would never purposely do anything to hurt me. Who knows? At one time I might have felt differently."

He paused a moment and fingered the yacht on the mantle before picking it up and gazing down at it lovingly. "But that time is long gone. I love a woman now who is more to me than Miranda ever dreamed of being. Brenda's everything…my life, my love, my best friend…everything. My only concern now is for her and our future…and that we actually get to have one." Jax replaced the yacht and turned back to Frisco. "To do that, I need to know everything. Now, tell me what secrets my brother's been keeping from me and how are they going to affect my plans to give Brenda and I the future we deserve…"
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"Oh my God." Brenda repeated as the full impact of what she was holding in her hands began to finally sink into her. "If this means what I think it does…" Brenda's eyes began misting with unshed tears. "If it's true…that must mean…I'm a…"

Brenda hastily replaced the charm and looked up at Joe and Rae. "I need to go home. Now. Please take me back to Lois'…"

"Brenda, what's going on? What have you found?" Joe asked as his curiosity about Brenda's reaction began to skyrocket.

Brenda shook her head unable to speak. Her hand kept gliding over the top of Jordan's box as if it were the most precious thing in the world to her. "Please. Just take me home."

Joe's eyes narrowed when he saw the look in Brenda's eyes and watched her hand find the ring hanging around her neck. The way she held onto it so tightly that her knuckles turned white gave Joe an idea of which 'home' she felt she needed to get back to. Turning to Rae, Joe nodded. "We're heading back. So, get out of here. Go home and…let's just keep this between the two of us, ok? I really don't think the department would appreciate their officers breaking and entering."

"Got it." Rae nodded her head before reaching out and putting a restraining hand on Joe's arm. "Joe. Please be careful with all of this." The request was a simple one but for the concern that laced each word it sounded like a last plea offered to a soldier entering battle.

Joe's gaze locked with Rae's and for a moment time seemed to stand still. "I will." He whispered as a slight smile touched his lips before he simply nodded, then opened the door. Rae sat and watched Joe and Brenda slip out of the car to follow the shadows of the trees toward their own before closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. "I hope you don't end up hating me for this, partner…"
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"It was before you and Miranda met. It only lasted a few weeks and Jerry was the one to end it." Frisco filled in the details of Jerry and Miranda's relationship as Jax handed Frisco a drink then sat down opposite him on the couch.

"So, when Jerry met me in Australia…"

"Your bride was a complete shock to him." Frisco finished. "Jerry left her thinking he'd never see her again. And she…" Frisco paused and looked away unsure of how his next words would affect Jax.

"She what?" Jax prompted quietly.

"She married you knowing she was carrying your brother's child." Frisco's eyes moved to Jax's face in time to see surprise and anger register in his blue-green eyes.

"She…was…pregnant?" Jax's voice was barely a whisper as he shook his head in disbelief. The more he heard the more he realized he never really knew Miranda at all. "I…how was she…"

"She was going to pretend the child was yours." Frisco shrugged his shoulders. "Then again, it's not that much different from now, is it?"

Jax ran his hand through his hair and got up from the couch to pace in front of the fireplace while his mind began to whirl. Everything he'd known…everything he'd believed in was crumbling around him like the walls of an ancient city. His first wife…pregnant before they even said their 'I do's'. Pregnant with his brother's child, no less. Suddenly those old feelings came racing back. The feelings of confusion. Of being completely lost. Not knowing who he was or where he was going or who to believe.

It was at that moment his eyes fell on the picture of he and Brenda, their arms around each other. Their love and support for each other so evident in their eyes. Despite the seriousness of the information he was being given and the implications of it all, Jax's eyes lit with a smile as the fog in his mind began to instantly clear. Everything in his past was a lie. But his present was an entirely different matter. Brenda was different. So was their love. He knew her like he'd known no other. There were no secrets. No lies. No doubts. Nothing anyone ever did to them would change that. Nothing.

Jax suddenly turned to Frisco, his mind once more focused on the situation facing him. "Does Jerry know? About the baby?"

Frisco nodded and let out a sigh. "He just found out. Miranda is telling him Jordan is his now."

"But…she's not even…"

"You're right." Frisco interrupted. "Jordan's not even her son. She lost their baby in the aftermath of the explosion. Jerry doesn't know that."

"God. What he must be going through…" Jax paced a moment more before stopping. "I should tell him, shouldn't I? I should tell him about…"

"Laurel?" Frisco added when Jax stopped his sentence abruptly realizing that maybe even Frisco didn't know the details of Jordan's parentage.

"You know."

"Yes." Frisco nodded before releasing a sigh. "I think you'd better sit down, Jax. There's more. There's a lot more. Only this time it has to do with Brenda…"
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Brenda stared off into the distance as the trees and buildings passed by. She wondered how all of it could have happened. What it all would mean for her future. Where she should go from here. If only she knew specifics. If only the details of her parentage were readily obtainable. If only she knew whether her mother was alive…

There were too many 'if onlys' and not enough facts. Her eyes misted with tears she'd been trying to hold back. The biggest 'if only' in her life was 'if only Jax were here'. She knew she could face any truth that waited for her if only he were by her side. But he wasn't. Because of Miranda and this damn plan of theirs…

Joe watched Brenda out of the corner of his eye as she sat in the front seat of the car and held onto Jordan's box. He pulled into the driveway and put the car in park before turning to address her for the first time. "You know, don't you? Something in that box tells you what you needed to know about your past."

Brenda swallowed hard then nodded.

"Well? What is it?" Joe's impatient voice broke the silence in the car. "Come on, Brenda. Whatever is in there that's telling you about your past, it can also tell me about Laurel's. Maybe it's something we can both use to find her…"

Brenda held up her hand as a tear began to trickle down her face. "I will, ok? Just…not now. It's too much to…" Brenda bent her head over the box as silent tears began to fall. "I need to…"

"What? Tell Jax?" Joe's voice took on an edge that shocked even him. He knew by the look in her eyes that's what she wanted most. If it were Jax sitting beside her, she wouldn’t have trouble speaking. Her tears may not be as heavy and her heart wouldn't be breaking so loudly right now. If he were Jax, she'd be healed. In that moment, he wanted nothing more than to be Jax. To have the power to take away her tears and be the one she opened her heart and secrets to. That's all he'd ever wanted with Laurel. Now, maybe he'd have the chance with Brenda…

Joe reached over and touched Brenda's shoulder. "Brenda…please. Talk to me. I know you'd rather have Jax, but in case you haven't noticed, Jax isn't here. From what I can see, he isn't going to be any time soon. I don't think you should be going through this alone." Turning forward again Joe muttered under his breath. "I don't even see how he can do it."

Brenda's eyes flashed fire as she turned on Joe. "Do what exactly?"

Joe sighed when he realized she'd heard him. Oh well. In for a penny…in for a pound. "Let you deal with all of this on your own. I mean, really. You just found out you have a twin sister and that she might be alive somewhere. That your mother might still be alive and what does he do? He runs back home to take care of his ex-wife. I know if you were mine, I'd never let you go through this alone…"

Brenda's head snapped up and her eyes blazed with the fire of anger. "Well, I'm not yours! Got it? You think I don't see the way you look at me, huh?" Brenda queried angrily before turning to look out the window and taking a deep breath to calm down. "Look. I know this has to be hard for you. It's hard for me too. I know I look like Laurel and I know you probably wish I were, but I'm not. I'm Brenda and I belong with Jax. Believe me, if he thought for one second that I needed him, he'd be here in a heartbeat. He wouldn't even think twice."

"Then call him." Joe challenged. "See what he does."

"Don't you dare tell me how to handle the man I love." Brenda's voice was low with determination and anger. "I know him better than anyone and if I say he'd come…he'd come. He just…can't right now."

"Fine." Joe shot back sullenly. "Then go to him. Or talk to me...or Lois. Do anything it takes. Just don't handle this alone."

"Oh, don't worry about me, Joe. I don't intend to…" Brenda responded hotly before opening the door and slipping out into the house.
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Helena grabbed up the phone as soon as it rang. "Yes?"

"Yeah, it's me. There's been a change of plans."

Helena's cat-like grin spread over her face while her voice remained matter-of-fact. "What change?"

"She's leaving to go back to him. She'll be there tonight."

Helena's smile reached her voice. "Job well done, Joseph. Because of your help, you'll be seeing your Laurel very soon. Very soon indeed…"
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"Brenda? Where ya goin'?" Lois' sleepy voice called out to her from the couch in the living room as Brenda slowly made her way to the door with bag in hand.

"I'm going home." Brenda replied simply as she approached Lois. "I…know who I am now, Lo."

"Who you are?" Lois sat up further and rubbed her eyes. "Hon, what are ya talkin' about?"

Brenda shook her head and let out a sigh. "I found something tonight. Something that gives me a pretty good indication who my father was." Brenda raised her hand to stop the question that sprang to Lois' lips. "Please understand. I…just need to be with Jax right now, Lo. I need him to be the first to know this. I need him to hold me and tell me everything is going to be alright."

"But…what about your plan? The one with Miranda…"

"This is important enough to risk it." Brenda stated firmly. She took a deep breath then before looking away then back again. "If he calls…just tell him I love him and I'll be home soon…"
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"Hans. It's me." Helena spoke into the phone after hanging up with Joe. "It's time to put my plan into motion. She'll be leaving soon. I want her taken before she gets on the flight. Oh, and one more thing…see that Joseph is escorted to his suite as well…"
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Brenda stepped out of the taxi and pulled her bag from the seat. She bent forward to pay the driver then turned toward the airport terminal. Her eyes searched for the sign to her airline never once noticing the car that pulled up behind her or the tall man in a dark coat that stepped up behind her and covered her mouth with a chloroform-covered cloth…
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Joe watched from his car as a man stepped up behind Brenda and wrapped his arm around her neck to cover her mouth. As her petite body slumped back against the man, Joe's hand flew to the door handle and he threw open his door. Before his foot hit the pavement, a blunt object hit the back of his head. The last thing he saw was Brenda's body being stuffed into the backseat of the car…
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After hours of talking with Frisco, Jax and he had parted with a viable plan formed and the first steps taken to thwart Miranda's schemes...and then some. Jax had next gone to the Outback and picked up a very tired little boy whose eyes were shut tight in peaceful dreams by the time his head hit the pillow.

Jax let out a weary sigh as he stepped into his bedroom and closed the door behind him. Except for a small light on his desk, the room was bathed in darkness. Jax reached up and undid his tie as he began to descend the stairs. Pulling his shirttails from his pants, he began to undo the top buttons of his shirt when a familiar voice coming from the direction of the bed stopped his hands in mid-air.

"Why don't you let me do that?"

Jax's eyes widened and a slight grin spread over his lips before his eyes narrowed with concern. "Brenda? Sweetie, what are you doing here? I thought we'd agreed…"

She was in front of him before he could blink. Her hands moved his to the side as she continued to unbutton his shirt, her long dark hair falling around her obscuring his view of her face before she ran her hands up his chest then down again and whispered sexily. "I missed you, that's all." She wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his chest pulling him close to her as she breathed in his scent. "I couldn't bear to spend another night without you in my arms."

"Brenda…" Jax's eyes narrowed and his voice held a slight warning though his arms wrapped around her waist betraying the real desire of his heart…to hold her near and never let go. "A lot has happened that I need to tell you about. There's danger…you really shouldn't be here…"

She began placing baby kisses across his chest despite the warning in his voice. "Do you really want me to go?"

Jax closed his eyes and ran his hands up her back then slipped his fingers through her hair as an intense sigh escaped him. "God, no." He pulled her face to his and connected their lips in a mind-numbing kiss before pulling back and hugging her to him fiercely, his eyes becoming distant. "I was just getting ready to shower." Jax informed the dark-haired beauty in his arms huskily. "Care to join me?"

He felt her smile against his chest. "I'll follow you anywhere…just lead the way…"

Jax pulled back and silently gazed into her eyes as he ran his hands down her arms before capturing her hands in his then turned to lead her toward the bathroom. He flicked on the light, pulled her inside and captured her lips once more as he slowly closed the door and locked it behind them…
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"No…Jax…no…" A tear slipped down Brenda's face as she watched the scene in Jax's room play out before her on the tv screen in front of her. An evil cackle filled the silence of the room as Brenda's head shook in pain and disbelief when the screen went black.

Brenda's head snapped up at the sound of the laugh and she blinked her eyes against the tears that threatened to fall. Her eyes immediately began scanning the small white room where she'd been placed searching for any sign of her captor. "Who are you? Why are you doing this to us?"

"Brenda Barrett. Always were the dramatic one, weren't you? Fortunately, your Jax is a very willing party to this little play I have staged for you. As for you…I'm merely equipping your new home with entertainment I was sure you would enjoy. I am a bit disappointed they didn't remain in the bedroom though. That way nothing would be left to your imagination. As it is, you'll just have to picture what's going on behind that closed door. Then again, it shouldn't be too hard for you. I'm sure you've experienced all the pleasures she is right now. The heat…the steam…the long deep kisses. They are his trademark, aren't they?" There was a pause then another laugh. "So, tell me. How does it feel knowing your twin sister is reaping the benefits of his love for you?"

"You're sick! You'll never get away with this!" Brenda yelled to her unseen abductor as she struggled against her restraints. "Jax will never believe...!"

A loud laugh filled the room once more. "Ahh, but my dear…he already has…"

The tv flicked back on and repeated the scene Brenda's mind would never forget as an evil laugh continued to mock her tears…

To be continued….