i avoided writing about september 11 when it happened. you could say i'm avoiding it now by doing this survey instead of an essay. i don't care what you say.

1. Where were you when you heard about the attacks on the pentagon and WTC?

i had my televison/alarm clock set to go off at 9:20 since i had a 10:30 class. When it came on, all I heard was static on channel 11. i thought it was my antenna, but I went through all the stations and it was the same thing until i got to cbs. that was the day everyone found out their backup transmitter was on the empire state building. i couldn't believe what i was seeing. i dont know how i managed that considering that they kept showing the second plane crashing over and over. it didn't look real to me. i climbed up the ladder in my room to the roof to see for myself. there was thick smoke in the air and the towers looked like matchsticks.

2. What country or group did you suspect immediately?

i was too worried to think about who was responsible. it didn't matter at that point. i was actually thinking about how they were going to put the fires out and save people. i wasn't clear on what had happened to the first building for a few minutes.

3. Who were you with? How did you react?

i woke david up after i came down from the roof. my mother, alex and alberto had already left for school and work.

4. Who did you call first?

no one. the phones didn't work until about 1 p.m.. when they were back on, i got calls from family asking if everyone was all right.

5. What did you do the rest of the day?

i watched tv. once more footage, more angles came in i started to lose it. i remember the smoke was drifting over our house and how quiet it was.

6. Did you have any friends or family killed in the attacks?

the real question is: if i'd lost someone in the attacks, would i be writing about it in a damn ONLINE SURVEY?

7. Do you think 9-11 should be a holiday?

not at all. if we are serious about honoring the dead then it should legally be just another day. national holiday status always trivializes the person/cause it's dedicated to. i don't want to look in the newspaper 30 years from now and see an ad for the september 11th sale at macy's. the experience affected everyone differently, we should be free to mourn in our own way or not all.

8. Do you think even a % of the money donated really made it to the families?

sure

9. Did you feel an increased sense of patriotism? Did it last?

i accepted being an american after this happened. i can't imagine living anywhere else. you won't see me running around with a two by four or finishing matches with a knee drop, but i love america. and as an american, i now know that someone may try to kill me someday to prove a point. our rights are being taken away left and right and for what? to save me from them. who are they? it's the new cold war. now instead of communism, we have 'the terrorist' to be afraid of. a new ememy for the government to throw money and young lives at. a few weeks after it happened, recruiters were at my brother's high school. and he was actually thinking about it. i thought about going for a while. not because of some rush of patriotism. for a while it felt like i'd be safer with a gun in my hand somewhere far away than in front of this computer.

10. Have you flown since the attacks? How soon did you fly again?

hell..........no. i won't be flying again for a while.

11. Have you been to Ground Zero?

once last month. in retrospect, i shouldn't have gone down there. it reminded me of the last time i was there. last august, some relatives of mine were up here from florida and i showed them around. one day, we managed to get to the met, the natural history museum, the statue of liberty and ellis island. while were were at the base of the statue, my aunt looked at the towers and said she wanted me to take her and the kids there. i'd been up since 8:30 with my aunt, her children and two of my brothers. i was tired. she wasn't leaving for antother two days. i'd stuck her two little boys' heads up a replica of the statue's nose. what more did she want from me? i told her 'you can see them next time you come to new york. they're not going anywhere.' how could i have said something like that? while i was being arrogant, someone was planning to destroy those buildings and kill the people inside.