4.1.2k1: 3:50 am-  Live from the studios of BWAI in New York City, it's the first Niteshift of the new millennium. Your hosts this week (and every week) are Mike Sargent and Byron Saunders. After an excellent 20 minute retro intro (25.2.99),  we're ready move on to a brand new show.
 
Segment One: Open Phone Lines

-Yoda and The Iron Horse, Jeff keep their streak of consecutive show appearances alive.

-According to the new new Niteshift Agenda, the show will feature classic Niteshift clips and 20th century Life Is Like Science Fiction.

Some Drunk Woman tries to give her assessment of the current situation at the station. Mike mercifully cut her slurred ramblings short.

Segment Two: Life Is Like Science Fiction

-East German dissidents labeled with radioactive chemicals, allowing Stasi secret police agents to track them using Geiger counters.

 -3.4 billion dollar NASA spacecraft Cassini has made it's flyby of Jupiter

-A mysterious monolith has been spotted in Seattle. Last time I checked, he was averaging just about ten points and eight rebounds a game for the Sonics.

-The Chilean government objected to the passage of a ship carrying French processed nuclear waste (76.8 tons of vitrified spent fuel)  to Japan via Cape Horn.

-The Indian Point nuclear plant leaks radioactive coolant just hours after reopening. The facility had been closed for 11-months closure to repair.....radioactive coolant leaks.

Best Of: Russian scientists develop high-speed superboots. Hydraulic shoes that allow the wearer to make 4-yard strides and reach a top speed of 25 miles per hour. Why?

-Zakia, a listener from the pre-Byron era of Niteshift calls in to touch base.

-An anonymous caller goes from spewing profanities to singing the national anthem of the Soviet Union. Nikolai Volkoff, eat your heart out.

Best Of: The nearsighted may soon be able to get tiny, transparent rings implanted into their corneas to improve their eyesight without laser surgery.

-Researchers find that one or  two daily drinks of wine, beer or liquor cuts your risk of stroke in minorities to half that of non-drinkers.

-A glass and a half of wine could help stave off neuro-degenerative diseases such as Alzheimer's and Parkinson's disease. A natural chemical produced by grapes and concentrated in wines increases the effectiveness of an enzyme that stimulates and regenerates nerve cells.
 

Present:

- Ten percent of American children suffer from some sort of mental illness, but only twenty percent of them are getting treated for it.

-Dozens of endangered sea turtles have been stricken with a mysterious virus.

-In India, more than 800 turtles were seized from a gang suspected of trying to smuggle them to Southeast Asia.
 
- Toxic industrial waste, overfishing and massive infrastructure development threaten the future of the Pearl River Delta Dolphin.
 

-The specialized teeth that allowed ancient shrew-like creatures to flourish and give rise to all modern mammals evolved independently in two animal groups living continents apart.

-Man attempts to kill his son for having sex with a dog.

-I call in to check my notes and to tell the bestiality joke I’d planned to put in this recap. Something about conjugal visits with the dog.

The show closes with a cameo appearance by andrea and Byron giving shoutout to his angels of the Black Spectrum Theatre.

-Joseph412