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The Rules of Chocolate




  1. If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands,
    you're eating it too slowly.
  2. Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices
    and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many
    as you want.
  3. The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home
    from the store in hot car. The solution: Eat it in the
    parking lot.
  4. Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll
    take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.
  5. A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily
    intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?
  6. If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer.
  7. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?
  8. If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top
    of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they
    will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.
  9. If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate,
    is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?
  10. Money talks. Chocolate sings.
  11. Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.
  12. Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
    A. Because no one wants to quit.
  13. If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control
    top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated.
  14. Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today.
    That way, at least you'll get one thing done







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