About this site
It took me quite a long time to decide whether to put this site online or not. There are several reasons.
As you might have noticed, there are no links from my other websites to this one, because this is a very private subject for me. I'm very embarrassed that I can't accept myself as I am, even though I tried to do that for so many years. I'm embarrassed that I have to care so much about weight and good looking when it is just a normal thing for others. I wansn't even so sure about showing my weight, but in the end I did it because everyone in the chat group has the same problem and is very open on their website.
Another reason that I'm still not sure if it was a good idea to create this website was that I'm not sure if I'm accepted by the weight loss community becaue I'm not over-weight and might not need support. I'm afraid that people will say that I shouldn't change anything and that I'm much luckier than other people. I thank G-d about everything He gave me, but still I struggle since the age of 12 that I'm always the "monster". Here in my country nearly everyone (and I'm not exaggerating) my age is quite skinny, the type of people who can eat lots but never gain weight. I feel that even though I've tried for so many years to accept me, I still couldn't be a day without thinking that I look different. So I decided to do something because I didn't want to be the one that always gets the biggest size available in shop (yes, my size here is the biggest in normal shops!). I decided that losing weight would make me feel better and I started a diet. It's quite difficult for me to lose weight, I have to be very strict that something changes. I had months of my diet when I really didn't eat much but nothing changed, really nothing. Now it seems to work better, but as you might know, no matter how many kilos you have, each and every one is a huge struggle. Again, maybe my goals are different, but I'll be happy to lose at least 1kg a month. It's not much, but my experiences show that usually it was even less in the diets I made before.
