Hutch’s Inner Thoughts


SCARED
(Missing Scene Sweet Revenge) 



The waiting is killing me. You're lying in a hospital bed and all I can do is 
think about myself. I'm sorry Starsk. I...I just hate seeing you lying there, 
helpless, nothing like the Starsky I know. Where's the Starsky that can't 
sit still for a minute, or the Starsky that used to annoy me? He's the 
Starsky that I want back in my life. 
I look at you now, and I want to cry. I can hardly tell you're breathing. I 
want to lay my hand on your chest to make sure, but I'm afraid to touch 
you. What if I put my hand there, and you stop? I don't think I could take 
it. It's hard to believe that we were talking and joking around just a few 
hours ago. You scared me, partner. For a minute there, I thought you'd 
had enough of this life, enough of me. You're still scaring me. Please wake 
up, Starsky. I don't know what to do or what to say to you. I'm not sure 
you can hear me. If only you could let me know that you do. Move your 
hand, if you can hear me. Move your finger. God, just move something! 
Let me know I'm getting through to you. What if you don't come back to 
me? I know, I know, we've talked about this before. We both knew it 
might happen someday. It goes with the job, but I can't help feeling the 
way I do. Jesus, Starsky, I'm scared. For the first time in my life, I'm 
really scared. 
 
 
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Written by Sonja H. van Schalm 
Edited by Patricia Lockard 
December 2001
Netherlands