1) Why do they name hurricanes and not tornados?
Meteorology meets bathroom training. When you take a quick, violent shit, the blame is uaually cast upon bad food or bad timing. Rarely is this fiend given a name. However, when you have the shits for a week or so, the bitch is given a name, like "the stomach flu." The same can be said about the reason hurricanes have names and tornados do not. Tornados are quick and violent; hurricanes are slow and drawn out. Surely this must be the reason.
2) Question
How long will it take Clint to get to Columbia...the asnwer is 1:20 if he doesn't get a ticket.
3) What is currently taped to the side of my computer besides a pin-wheel?
A Durex, lubricated, extra strength, "strong and durable" latex condom. (This is a true statement)
4) How many women do you think James Bond has done in his lifetime?
40.5, the .5 is for the time when Q was feeling lonely, and Jame thought he owed it to him.
5) If it wasn't for that horse, would I have spent that year in college?
The end of the universe is in Houston, Texas. in Houston there is a Starbucks across the street from another Starbucks.
6) Pancakes, neither pan, nor cake, whats going on here?
The hotel de Maurer does not serve pancakes. The menu includes scrambled eggs on Saturday, and waffles on Sunday; there are no pancakes.
7) According to Rick Moranis, what is the relation of Lord Helmet to Lone star, in the movie SpaceBalls?
His father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate. "Whats that make us?" "Nothing."
8) Favorite narritive epic of the pre-neo Grecian era?
Grecian #5, hair color for men.
9) What the heck is gum made out of?
How the hell should I know? What I do know is if you blow another (censored) bubble with that gum, I am going to kick your ass.
10) If you ruled the world, what three things would you get rid of?
Brian McCally, *** *****, and Djibouti