And then you come home, high on lentils
Arrgh! The Darts! Annoying cluncks in sets of 3! Ahhhhhhhhh!!
Look at that dress, it looks like an explosion in a plum factory
I want a fucking marachino cherry
Please stop talking. And breathing. Yes, you really need to stop breathing
I am aware of the ramifications of stealing ghosts
You only have an electric shaver to annoy the rest of us
I joined this church, and God gave me a toaster oven
I am Vishnu the Destroyer! Date me or perish!
I am a Buddhist. A Buddhist who needs to do laundry
Quit kissing my horse goodbye!
Why is the internet so porn-filled? Not that I'm complaining
No one is nicer than me! And if you disagree, I'll kick your ass!
Bald people are inherently evil
Mystical Hopscoth!
Be like Buddha! Close your eyes a lot!
Well, if you think me talking to my roommate's ass about bacon is weird, then prepare for extreme psychological warfare
Drink now - backstabbing can wait
You can be a Puritan if you want, just don't expect your sex life to take off
I thought there were too many potted plants in here for this to be Hell
Shoot something! Anything! Not that!
It's a special kind of Black-Hole that only steals staples.
Raw Sewage is fun!
From now on, I promise not to dip sacred artifacts in the toilet
If you leave 'em in too long, a small fire starts and kills all the disaffected college students
