Now, when asked what the Meaning of Life is, the correct answer is, of course, 42. However, most normal, well adjusted, emotionally stable people don't understand this response. Instead, they think that the Meaning lies somewhere in family, religion, honesty, love and other such rubbish. No. I'm sorry, but you are terribly wrong. However, I want to help. Here you will find guidlines and advice that will keep you well within the established Meaning. Go on then!
*Wave your penis around (men only)
*Spit alot
*Laugh at stupid people
*Use lots of waffel irons
*Frogs. Involve a frog in everything you do
*If you aren't already, pretend to be gay sometimes
*Don't waste time on socks. If they don't match, who the fuck cares?
*People would rather buy chocolate than wallpaper
*You always hurt the ones you love, but that doesn't mean you can hit 'em with your car
*Poetry is artistic, not sound advice for living
*Stop pretending you don't like at least some parts Pop Culture! We all know you do!
*Curse. Go on, it's fun
*If you ignore actors, they go away
*Don't use fabric softener
*If you have kids, everyone else HATES hearing about them
*The strongest foundation of love is a bitter power struggle
*Remain calm most of the time. That way, when you finally do explode, people will really notice
*Find something else to get angry at besides authority
*Stop wasting my time with your stupid drama
*Extroverts die early
*Being left handed doesn't make you special
*Nobody wants to be alone, but if you are, deal with it!
*Spend more time in the sunshine
*Horses are ugly smelly animals who are not deserving of your obsession
*Math...yes you do actually sometimes need it so quit whining, damn it!
*Drug use is an undeniable sign of mental and emotional weakness
*No, sorry. Some people are just plain ugly.
*You are only allowed to enjoy one out of seven Disney movies
*Don't send food back, just eat the bloody Shimp Lo Mein
*I've changed my mind. Use fabric softener. Just lighten up on the bleach a bit, OK?
*Don't underestimate the power of cereal
*Throwing yourself in the Pit of Despair is bad, but you can look over the edge a few times if you want
