THE
FATE OF HUMANITY
in Red Dwarf
After
playing a long maybe even semi-serious campaign (as serious as any Smeghead can get in Red Dwarf) the A.I. may want to bring it all to a
climatic conclusion. Indeed your
characters may wind up answering the Ultimate Red Dwarf Question (no the answer is
not Forty-Two ya Goit). Whatever happened to Humanity & Mother
Earth? Submitted here for the AI’s
approval are some ideas & suggestions on how to incorporate that theme into
the campaign.
Fate
One) -SUPER EVOLVED GODLIKE HUMANS
Rimmer- “Lister, can you imagine what Mankind has
become? Look what Evolution has done to
a household pet in three Million years!
If you return to Earth you will be to them the equivalent of the slime
that just crawled out of the ocean!”
Lister- “I could smarten m’self up a bit.”
Imagine after three million
years Humanity evolves into a Super Energy Being Race of Pure Thought! Like the “Q”, or the Organians
from Star Trek, or that Super Evolved Energy Human in the last episode of Season
Four of the TV series Babylon 5 that took place a million years into the
future. You know the one I’m talking
about!
Today we have Homo Sapiens Sapiens, but in the far, far, far, far, far, far, far, far,
far, far, far, far, future we could have Homo Sapiens Apotheosis (i.e. humans
becoming god-like).
So if the Smegheads
get back to Earth how will that play out?
Well, since evolved Super Energy Pure Thought Humans would have godlike
powers there isn’t much a Smeghead could do. So an AI might have a SEPTH (i.e. Super
Energy Pure Thought Humans) act either in the role of “Q” & torment the
characters by forcing them into various tests or the AI might have such beings
act as Jiminy Cricket & show up as the Player Characters “conscience” whenever
the Smegheads do something they shouldn’t have done.
OTOH this IS Red Dwarf! The Boyz are often
a Cosmic Nexus point for the Impossible.
As I recall in the fairy tale Puss N’ Boots. The main feline character was able to defeat
a very large & powerful magic Ogre by playing on his vanity. He expressed doubt the Ogre could turn
himself into a mouse. The Ogre in order
to show him up transformed into a mouse upon which Puss N’ Boots ate him! Just because your Smegheads
are dealing with near omnipotent godlike power doesn’t mean they can’t find an
angle. Make one for them! Otherwise what’s the point in playing? After all a Super Energy Pure Thought Human
may have advanced intelligence, knowledge & power but he could also have a
godlike fragile ego that can be exploited.
Imagine an Ego that could prevent his vast intelligence from even
conceiving that such lowly creatures, like the Red
Dwarf Smegheads, could in anyway get the
better of him. Also let us not
forget. The following analogy, germs are
to modern Humans what Humans are to Super Energy Pure Thought Humans. Germs can still make us sick! Get it?
Fate Two) -SUPER EVOLVED NON-GODLIKE HUMANS
Of course the AI may want to
take it down a notch. Imagine far future
Humanity is now a race of dwarfs 4 to 4 ˝ feet in height with huge bald heads
like the Talosians from Star
Trek. These far future humans have
evolved super intelligence but at the expense of physical strength. Thus these Super Evolved Humans would have a
STRENGTH score no greater or less than 2.
However their INTELLIGENCE score would be either 8 or 9 & a WILL
score would be around 6. Needless to say
they would be vulnerable to conventional weapons IF the Players could get off a
shot. For like the Psirens
& the Talosians they would have the power to
create mental illusions. Also like the Talosians, their illusions can be blocked by certain strong
emotions (AI’s choice of one or more) Hate, Anger, Lust, Hunger, Bitterness or
Love of Curry. The player characters
might be captured by the Super Evolved Humans & treated as animals or pets
to be put in a zoo but the Boyz from the RED DWARF might
just have other ideas & plan a fantastic escape.
The big problem with the Super Evolved Humans
is they feel empty because they are all logic with no emotions. Maybe the RED DWARF crew might try to assist
these hapless decedents of Mankind by helping them discover how to feel
again? What better way than to escape
& throw a huge kegger, curry & Pizza party
for the whole planet! With videos,
dancing & a Slip N’ Slid. Of course
if you want to make it even more Epic, as well as silly, have an army of Psirens invade the Earth & place your characters in the
middle of an illusion war!
LISTER: “SMEGGIN HELL! Just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse!”
Fate Three) SLIGHTLY EVOLVED HUMANS
Of course in three million years the Human
Race could have only made a few modest evolutionary improvements as opposed to
some form of extreme apotheosis. Such as
INTELLEGENCE scores between 6 & 7. Evolved Human height would be around 7
to 8 feet, completely hairless, no appendix, ultra immune system & a very
efficient digestive system that can live on any organic matter. Plus in general they should get a +1 for most
of their other ability scores. They have
created a working utopian society & these evolved humans might just look
down their noses at the RED DWARF crew in much the same manner the Crew of
the Holoship ENLIGHTENMENT did. OTOH their arrogance would make the crew of
the ENLIGHTENMENT look humble.
Conflict with this future society could be
based on who can deliver the most cutting insults to the other. The AI could incorporate the plot of EARTH
the un-filmed last episode of Season Eight.
(See the RED DWARF SEASON VIII guidebook) After returning from the Mirror Universe the
Gang brings some anti-matter with them to power the RED DWARF which flies out of control
at super fast hyper-light speeds & crashes into the Earth. They flatten the Whitehouse,
Fate Four) ZARDOZ
The Boyz make it back to
Earth & find there is a race of normal looking immortal humans with
somewhat advanced psychic powers who want more than anything to die! (Not unlike that movie with Sean
Connery). The problem is Earth is bathed
in an ETERNITY ENERGY FIELD brought to you by the same gimboids
who created the JUSTICE FIELD. Nobody
can die. If a person tries to commit
suicide the ETERNITY ENERGY FIELD just heals & rebuilds him, from scratch
if necessary. Knowledge of how to
deactivate the EEF has been lost for tens of thousands of years. The Boyz have to go
on a mission to assemble (use very important item generator) a device made from
items originally found in the Twenty Third century that will short circuit the
EEF & allow the Immortal Humans to finally die. However after this is done with the ability
to die restored to them Humanity’s long dead self preservation instinct kicks
in again! As if there hasn’t been enough
bad luck a vast army of Rogue Simulants is about to
invade & wipe the Human Race out once & for all. Now the same people who were begging to die
are begging the gang to save them because they lost the ability to fight. Can the Boyz
transform the anti-EEF machine they just built into a massive DNA Modifier
& transform the Simulant Army into a bunch of
harmless Hamsters? One last hope! One last stand! One last battle to save everything in the
most conceivably ridiculous way possible!
Fate Five) SIMPLE EXTINCTION
The gang reaches Earth & finds it
uninhabited by any intelligent life.
They find only the ruins of past human civilization. Mankind is gone. Now all that is left is the hope that any
human playing characters of the opposite sex might find a way to repopulate the
planet. Or if the Human player
characters are all the same sex (& straight) they might find some ancient
cloning equipment that can be used to generate opposite sex clones (adds new
meaning to the praise “Go screw yourself” don’t it?). Granted after millions of years the equipment
might be a little faulty & the opposite gender clones could wind up with
cow ears, the odd octopus tentacle or some other bizarre deformity. Or the Boyz (Girlz?) could simply strike out in search of the lost nanobot resurrected crew of the RED DWARF &
lead them back home.
Fate Six) THE DAY OF THE COCKROACH OR DOLPHIN OR
(insert appropriate animal here)
Humanity has died out long ago & evolved
intelligent cockroaches/dolphins/whatever (insert animal of choice here) have
taken over & created an advanced civilization & now rule the
Earth. OTOH if you REALLY want to be
unoriginal here is an idea I’m thinking PLANET OF
THE GRAPE APES. That is you have
the standard Apes rule the World classic bit, but they are the color purple not
brown or black. So what is the
difference between this scenario & the famous Hestonian
classic Gorilla flick? Hey did I mention
the Apes are purple?
Imagine
this scene with Lister in front of a half buried Statue of Liberty or with him
maybe it would be more appropriate for it to be a famous Pub in
LISTER: “YOU SMEGGING MANIAC SMEGHEADS! DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU ALL TO SMEGGING HELL!”
RIMMER: “God Lister!
Could you possible say something less original?”
LISTER:
“Smeg-off Rimmer! I’m just trying to get into the spirit of
things. Ya got
no soul man.”
Fate
Seven) WIZARDS
Long ago there was a cataclysmic world wide
nuclear catastrophe. After millions of
years the radioactive clouds cleared up & what was left of humanity has
devolved into Mutants or evolved into post humanoid “Elves” (pointy eared long
lived psychic post-humans) & “Faeries” (large or small post-humans with
insect wings) . It helps if the AI has
seen the animated movie WIZARDS. This scenario
affords the opportunity to mix Deep7’s ARROWFLIGHT
game with EARTHAD (by
Politically Incorrect Games) into a Red Dwarf
RPG setting.
Fate
Eight) ICE WORLD
The Boyz might return to
Earth only to find it’s in the middle of another Ice Age. They could then adopt one of the other scenarios
with this as an added twist. OTOH the Boyz could visit an Ice World Earth & find the World
ruled by a race of Evolved Polar Bears or Seals or even a gene spiced Race of Transhumans with Polar Bear & Seal DNA. The Player Characters should remember to
dress warmly.
Fate
Nine) WATER WORLD
The Polar Ice caps have melted & the
remnants of Humankind sail the World looking for dry land……..On second thought
this idea bites! I mean the movie was
terrible! Forget I said anything.
Fate
Ten) MACHINE WORLD
The Boyz return to Earth & find Humanity is long extinct
& now the Mechanoids have taken over.
There are several factions of Mechanoids living on Earth at this time. Mechanoids from Faction Alpha are built to
resemble Humans & live & act just like real Humans. They believe since Humans where their
Creators they owe it to them to carry on in their name. So Units of this faction have created a
society that looks & almost acts like real humans. This has lead to some interesting
innovations in android technology. The
Human looking Mechanoids are programmed to adjust their physical features as
they “age” & at a randomly computer selected date they “die” of old age. There are “male” Human Mechanoids &
“female” Human Mechanoids who fall in love & marry. The “females” build new “baby” Mechanoids in
their tummies using nano-technology. The “males” of course contribute half the
“baby’s” programming & nanobots. It’s touching & bizarre all at the same
time.
Faction Omega believes humans are gone so
Mechanoids are no longer obliged to carry on their original programming. They figure humans had their time now they
must find their own destiny. Faction
Omega lives in giant metal cities where thousands of very robot
looking Mechanoids live & work to create their own Machine Culture. Faction Delta is a small faction of
Mechanoids that are rejects from both societies. They are either too human like for the
Omega’s or not human enough for the Alpha’s.
So they live underground & scavenge for used parts.
Fate
Eleven) GARBAGE WORLD
See
the Red Dwarf Novel BETTER THAN LIFE. Earth was abandoned long ago &
transformed into a giant garbage dump for the rest of the planets in the solar
system. That is until an unfortunate
explosion sent the trash covered Earth hurling into deep space. The Boyz could
stumble across Garbage Earth & try to find a way to tow it back to the
solar system. They better make sure they watch out for the Giant Cocroaches & Polymorphes.
After about the 43rd century Human
Scientists more or less proved Earth was the only planet in creation to
originally evolve life. Today three
million years later the Human race no longer inhabits the Universe. During the Era of Interstellar Travel almost
200,000 terraformed S3 planets had been created
radiating outward from Earth over the next dozen millennia. A few settlements
even went as far as the Magellanic Clouds & some
modern day Evolved Animal archeologists speculate the ancient Humans even went
as far as the Andromeda Galaxy.
Various
Human civilizations it is estimated may have existed here and there for about
110,000 years. There must have been at
least four or five Galactic Empires during the entirety of Human history &
also a lot of lost & forgotten History.
In fact after the year 15,000AD most of the Galaxy forgot they came from
Earth. By the year 30,605AD Humans,
genetically uplifted Animals, GELFs, & genetically modified near humans
(i.e. Genies) Scientists all across the Milky Way were postulating that Intelligent
life in fact evolved on separate planets then merged when they discovered space
travel. Indeed the “theory” that all
life in the Galaxy came from one planet has been dismissed by most academics as
a mystical romantic belief held by religious fundamentalists. Though by the year 30,615AD (i.e. year 987
Second GALACTIC EMPIRE ERA) most scientists “proved” the Milky Way was in fact
the only Galaxy in the whole Universe to evolve life. Only the ancient inhabitants of one obscure
pale blue dot knew better, but they lost interest in the Galaxy at large & turned
inward on themselves. What happened to the Humans who lived on other
planets? The majority over time became
extinct and a tiny minority evolved or mutated into a new species of humanoids. None of the Humans outside of Earth ever
evolved into Super Beings. Nobody knows
why. The present Galaxy now belongs to
the GELFs, Genies, Mutants, post-human humanoids, AI's, Androids, Simulants & Evolved Animals that
Humanity the Prime Sentient Race left behind. That is until
one day some Gimboid slovenly Relic of a bygone Era
arises from stasis on a derelict Mining Ship & once again walks
amongst the stars! (Too Dramatic?).
Welcome to the future that is RED DWARF!