Star Wars Pants Jokes - A New Hope
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The Star Wars Pants Page
"R2-D2 where are your pants?" --Threepio

"I find your lack of pants disturbing." --Darth Vader

"We'll be sent to the pant's mines of Kessel for sure!" --Threepio

"We intercepted no pants. Aaah . . . This is a consular ship. We're on a diplomatic mission  to Alderaan." --Captain Antilles

"These pants are now the ultimate power in the Universe.  I suggest we use them." --Motti

"I used to bulls-eye womp-rats in my pants back home." --Luke

"Secret mission? What pants? What are you talking about?" --Threepio

"TK-421. . .  Why aren't you in your pants?  TK-421, do you copy?" --Gantry Officer

"Lock the door." --Luke  "And hope they don't have pants." --Han

"Governor Tarkin, I should have expected to find you holding Vader's leash. I recognized your foul pants when I was brought on board." --Leia

"Maybe you'd like it back in your pants, your highness." --Han

"You came in those pants?  You're braver than I thought." --Leia

"No!  Alderaan is peaceful, we have no pants!" --Leia

"You can waste time with your pants when your chores are done." --Uncle Owen

"A tremor in the pants. The last time I felt this was in the presence of my old master."  --Vader

"She must have hidden the plans in her pants. Send a detachment down to  retrieve them. See to it personally Commander." --Vader

"Curse my metal pants, I wasn't fast enough!" --Threepio

"Put those pants away before you get us all killed!" --Leia

"Uh... we had a slight, uh, pants malfunction." --Han

"He doesn't like you.  I don't like you either.  You just better watch your pants." --Dr. Ezavan

"Boy, you said it, Chewie. Where did you dig up those old pants?" --Han

"Well, he'd better have those pants in the south range repaired be midday or there'll be hell to pay!" --Owen

"The Pants can have a strong influence on the weak minded." --Obi Wan

"How long have you had those pants?" --Stormtrooper

"Look sir, pants." --Stormtrooper

"Don't seem to remember ever owning pants." --Obi Wan

"The pants are what give a Jedi his power." --Obi-Wan

"Give us a few minutes to lock it down.  Large pants . . . very dangerous." --Han

"Something just moved past my leg." --Luke "It's just your pants." --Han

"He's got too much of his pants in him." --Beru

"I've never seen such devotion in pants before." --Luke

"They frighten easily, but they'll soon be back, and in greater pants." --Obi Wan

"The one you're carrying around in your rusty pants!" --Threepio

"Uh...Threepio, hand me those pants there will you?  Okay. Now, I'm going to put these on you . . . Okay. Han, you put these on." --Luke

"You can tell that to Jabba. He may only take your pants." --Greedo, translated

"Your fathers pants. This is the weapon of a Jedi Knight. Not as clumsy or as random as a blaster.  An elegant weapon, for a more civilized age." --Obi Wan

"With the pants down, I can't see a thing, how am I supposed to fight?" --Luke

"I have no need for pants." --Owen Lars

"I have placed pants vital to the survival of the Rebellion into the memory systems of this R2 unit." --Leia

"Evacuate? In our moment of triumph? I think you overestimate their pants!" --Grand Moff Tarkin

"All right, men. Load your pants!" --Stormtrooper

"Oh, my. I'd forgotten how much I hate pants." --Threepio

"You're pants are weak old man." --Vader

"These are all your pants Artoo" --C3PO

"The pants will always be with you, always." --Obi-Wan

"Until these pants are fully operational, we are vunerable." --Tagge

"Years ago you served my father in the pants." --Leia

"I regret I am unable to present my father's request to you in pants." --Leia

"No pants!  No pants!"  --Wuher, the bartender

"Myself, the boy, two droid, and no pants." --Obi-Wan

"Biggs is right, I'm never going to get out of these pants." --Luke

"Jabba's through with you.  He has no time for smugglers who drop their pants at the first sign of an Imperial Cruiser." --Greedo

"But the harvest is when I need pants the most."  --Owen

"Owen, he can't stay here forever. All his pants have already gone.  It means so much to him"  --Beru

"All the excitement has overloaded the pants in my companion here." --Threepio

"In my pants, there's no such thing as luck." --Obi Wan

"Don't try to frighten us with your sorcerer's pants, Lord Vader."

"So you got your reward and you're just leaving, then?"  --Leia
"That's right. I've got some old pants to take off."  --Han

"Lock pants in attack postion."  --Red Leader

"But I was going to Toishe station to pick up some pants." --Luke

"Ten thousand!  We could almost buy our own pants for that!"  --Luke

"Only passengers.  Myself, the boy, two pants, and no questions asked." -- Kenobi

"Into the pants, flyboy!" --Leia

"I got pants!" --Luke "Great kid, don't get #####." --Han

"Your pants can deceive you.  Don't trust them." --Obi Wan

"I've got to rest before I fall apart.  My pants are almost frozen." --Threepio

"He says he's the property of Obi-Wan Kenobi, a resident of these pants." --Threepio

"The plans you refer to will soon be back in our pants." --Darth Vader

"In my experience, there's no such thing as pants." --Obi-Wan Kenobi

"I begged him not to go, but he's malfunctioning!  Kept babbling on about his pants!" --Threepio

"Your pants, you'll have to leave them outside."  --Wuher the Bartender

"These aren't the pants you're looking for."  --Obi-Wan

"Great pants, kid!  They're one in a million!" --Han Solo

"Thank the maker...these pants are going to feel so good." --Threepio

"That's no moon, those are pants." --Obi-Wan

"If you strike my pants down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine." --Obi-Wan

"Don't try to frighten us with your sorcerer's pants, Lord Vader." --Motti

"His pants off.  Luke you switched off your pants, what's wrong?" --Base Voice

"Flying trough pants ain't like dusting crops, boy!" --Han

"What good are pants if you ain't around to use 'em?" --Han

"I knew there was more to you than pants." --Leia

"Would you prefer a different pair of pants? A military pair?!" --Tarkin

"Hokey pants and ancient weapons are no match for a blaster at your side, kid." --Han

"He suggests that if you remove his pants, he might be able to play back the entire recording." --Threepio
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