Author: Elizabeth
Rating: PG-13 or higher
Category: J/A, L/G
Summary: One way or another someone�s always late. The outcome could either be serious or lucky
Disclaimer: I own no one.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Adam was sitting on the porch trying not to think of the possibility that Jane�his Jane was gone. They had gotten in touch with Will, who said he wasn�t sure how many people were in the clinic at the time. He was choked up trying not to think about the fact his only daughter could be in the clinic.
Adam put his head in his hands. He couldn�t cry. If he cried then it would be real. If he lost one more important person in his life, he�d scream.
�Adam?�
Adam looked up in shock. Joan stood there with a grocery bag in her hand.
�Jane.� He said shakily. Adam slowly stood up. He looked into her eyes and over her figure. He looked back at her face.
�You�ve been crying. What�s wrong?�
She walked towards him but he met her halfway and gathered her in his arms. Joan jumped a bit but let him hold her as he cried.
�Adam shh it�s okay, it�s okay. I�m here. I�m here.�
�Sh please don�t talk. Just let me hold you.� He breathed in the scent of her hair.
�Okay.� Joan stroked his back and let him hold her, unaware of what could have happened to her.
Adam finally let go and stroked her face. Joan didn�t know what was making him act this way.
�The clinic was bombed.� Adam finally let out.
�I�what!� Joan�s eyes widened in shock.
�We thought you were there. You�re mom�s really scared. Luke, Kevin, Grace�we all��
�Oh my God.� Joan ran inside and she almost started to cry when she saw her family watching the television, horrified looks on their faces. �Mom!�
�Joan!� Helen quickly gathered her daughter in her arms. �My baby. My baby girl.� Helen held her tightly not daring to let go. Kevin and Luke�s bodies slumped in relief on seeing their sister. Joan let go of her mom briefly to hug Kevin and then Luke. She finally looked at her mother and saw how pale she looked. Hating that she caused this, Joan held her hands tightly.
�I�m here mom. Mom, tell me what happened.�
�Look.�
Joan turned to the TV and listened to the report. Witnesses reported seeing a man wander in with a long trench coat on. Joan was aware of Adam and Helen both holding her close as Kevin took her hand and Luke put a hand on her shoulder. Grace was sitting next to Adam.
�I�I can�t watch this anymore.� Joan ran upstairs. Adam followed her. Grace looked up at Luke.
Adam got to Joan�s room and saw her sitting on the bed holding a pillow to her chest. He went over and sat next to her.
�Jane?�
Joan looked at him. �I could have died Adam.�
He took her hand. �But you didn�t. You�re here with us. Where were you?�
�The store. I had to get something for mom but it took me longer than I thought it would. I saw what time it was and decided not to go to the clinic.�
�You decided not to go?� Grace asked.
Joan turned to see Grace and her brother standing there. Luke seemed deep in thought �It�s been on my mind. I just didn�t know how to say it. I just knew it was the right thing to do.�
�Maybe God had other plans.� Adam suggested.
�I don�t�I really don�t know what He wants.� Joan said softly. Adam looked at her curiously. �What do you think I should do?�
�It�s not about what I think. It�s your body, your decision.� Adam replied.
Joan looked at Grace, who put her hands up.
�Freedom of choice, Girardi. I�m just glad you�re still around.�
Joan let out a sigh and looked at Luke who had yet to say anything.
�Luke?�
Luke looked at her for a few moments. �It doesn�t matter. I couldn�t care less right now. I almost lost my sister. So whatever you want is fine.�
Joan sighed. She had the feeling that he wasn�t telling her the full truth but she knew he needed time to adjust. �Thanks guys.� Joan got up and went over to the mirror. She put her hands over her stomach. This time she didn�t flinch.
�So what are you going to do?� Grace asked.
Joan looked at them. �I�ll tell you when I figure it out.�
Adam got up and hugged her.
Grace and Luke looked at each other.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Joan was sitting outside her house when the mailman walked up.
�Here�s your mail, Joan.�
Joan took it and looked at him.
�You really do work in mysterious ways.�
He smiled. Joan looked away. She listened to the sounds of nature before looking at God.
�What would have happened? If I had gone?�
�You�d be dead. Your father would have found you and he�d be in a trance for the rest of his life. Helen would end up leaving. Kevin would never be the same. Luke would have run away. Grace would have gone after him, both never to return and Adam would never work on his art again.�
Joan stood up. �Take that back.�
�It�s not your time, Joan. And it�s not the baby�s time either.� He walked away giving her His wave.
Joan watched him go then put her hand on her stomach. She left her house and found herself going to see Adam. Adam was welding and she smiled watching him do his work. Adam looked up and spotted her. He put down his things and pulled up his safety gear.
�Hey Jane.�
�Hey. I made my decision.�
Adam looked at her. �About what?�
�The baby.�
Adam nodded. �And?�
�I�m going to keep it.�
�You don�t look so sure.� Adam said.
Joan sat down. �I know. But, he�s a part of me. I thought getting rid of him would be the right thing but now�I can�t imagine it.�
�I�m here. I�ll help you out.� Adam gave her a smile.
�Thanks. So what are you making?� she stood up to look at his newest piece, which just looked like melted wires.
�Uh�no idea. But I was planning on a memorial for the people who died in the explosion.�
�That�s really sweet, Adam.� Joan kissed him. �Do you have any pickles?�
Adam sighed. �Here we go.�
Joan playfully smacked him in the arm.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Grace sat across from Luke on his living room couch trying to figure out what was going through his mind. They had just found out from Joan what her decision was and Luke had showed no emotion.
Grace folded her legs beneath her and looked at him.
�Okay, what are you thinking? Are you mad?�
Luke shrugged. �It�s not my place to tell Joan what to do just because of how I feel.�
�And that would be�?�
�Why are you pushing this?� Luke asked.
�Hey you pushed me with my mother, now it�s payback.�
Luke looked at his hands. He looked behind him towards the stairs and cringed. He turned his glance over to Grace.
�I don�t want Joan to know what I think.�
�About what?�
�The baby.�
Grace nodded. �And how�s that?�
�You feel the same way!�
�Yeah, the difference is I�m trying. I mean I don�t like that this happened but I�m not going to tell her what to do. She made a choice but she could have died, Luke. Her decision almost killed her.�
Luke realized she had a point that he didn�t want to see. He wasn�t ready to face the truth.
�I�m trying too. I just don�t want her to know.�
�She has to.�
Luke shook his head. �I�ll tell her. I�ll tell her once I can get my emotions under control.�
�Fine.� Grace got up and grabbed her bag. �I have to go. See you tomorrow?�
�Same time, same place.�
Grace kissed him quickly before going towards the door. She heard footsteps and Joan say her name. Grace turned.
�What?�
�Can I talk to you for a second?�
�Sure.� Grace followed her up to her room. �What�s up?�
�I just wanted to know how Luke�s doing.�
�Oh um�he�ll be fine. Just give him time to get used to�this.� Grace didn�t know how put out the words �the baby.� She wasn�t fully ready to comprehend everything.
Joan nodded. �And what about you? What do you think?�
�Why should my feelings be any of your concern?�
Joan smiled nervously. �Because you�re my best friend�and I�oh nevermind you�ll kill me.�
�No, what?�
�Nothing.� Joan shook her head.
�Spit it out, Girardi!�
�I want you to be the baby�s Godmother.�
Grace�s eyes widened and she laughed. �Who? Me? I�d screw the kid up for life!�
Joan rolled her eyes. �No you wouldn�t.�
Grace smiled. �I can�t believe you�re asking me this.�
�You don�t have to. If you can�t stand the idea of me having a rapist�s baby�� Joan froze.
Grace walked over to her. They stared at each other for a few moments. �It�s your baby. If you ever refer to him that way, I will torture you. I will also, as his Godmother, torture anyone who calls him that. You can count on it.�
Joan grinned. �Grace I�thanks.�
�Yeah well�� Grace headed for the door but stopped and turned. �I didn�t want you to keep the baby. But after that day I realized�he didn�t do this to you. He�s just�there. He�s growing and I�m sure that in your own weird way, you�ll help him grow into an okay kid.�
Joan nodded, trying not to cry. Grace was doing the same thing. Grace left the room and stood in the hallway for a moment trying to build up her composure. She wiped her eyes to get rid of the tears before going downstairs and leaving the house.
Joan stood in her spot thinking about what Grace said. She sat on the bed and held a pillow close to her.