Season 1

 

 

Episode No. 1

Episode Title: JAG: A New Life pt.1

 

Quote:

 

Kate:   Those wings look good on you.  (points to the gold wings on the uniform)
Harm:   Well, you know what they say about gold wings and dress whites. They'll get you in bed anywhere.
Kate:   Except here.

 

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CAG: She still married to that used car salesman?

Harm: yes sir.

 

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Kate: I thought that you said that your mother was married to Senior VP at Chrysler.

Harm: She is.

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 3

Episode Title: JAG: Shadow

 

Quote:

 

 Harm is leaning over Meg's shoulder

Meg: Don't you have something to do sir?

Harm: I'm doing it.

Meg: By bugging me?

Harm: I'm lending moral support.

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 4

Episode Title: Desert Son

 

Quote:

Harm: There's no way your guy...

Meg: How do you know it’s a man?

Harm: ...could possibly restore something on that tape that was never there.

Meg: And who said anything about restoring? There are more things in the heavens and the earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy. Especially in the heavens.

 

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Meg: I'll need to borrow the humvee for an hour, sir.

Harm: What's up?

Meg: I think I have a way to restore what was on that tape.

Harm: When I suggested sending the tape to Kate, you said it couldn't be done.

Meg: I know, sir. And Lt. Pike couldn't have done it.

Harm: But you can?

Meg: I think so.

Harm: How?

Meg: I'll have to plead article five of the officer's code of conduct, sir.

Harm: Name, rank, serial number, and date of birth?

Meg: It's the closest thing to a "I can't tell you how I'm gonna do it" article, sir.

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Ollie: Hi Meg.

Meg: Do you have it?  (Ollie hands her a tape)  Thanks. (Kisses him on the cheek)

Ollie: (motioning to Harm who is waiting in a humvee, further down the road) Who's that?

Meg: That's my partner.

Ollie: He's gonna think I'm a boyfriend.

Meg: That's the idea!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 5

Episode Title: Brig Break

 

Quote:

Kate (referring to Harm): The Lieutenant been giving you any trouble?

Meg: Nothing I can't handle.

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 6

Episode Title: JAG: Déjà vu

 

Quote:

Meg: Sorry I broke up the party. ~

Harm: We were just talking. ~

Meg: Harm, you and I are just talking. You and she were tangoing across the dance floor, half naked, one foot in the nearest bedroom. ~

Harm: You got all that form a 'Pleasure to meet you Lieutenant'

 

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Meg: (on the phone with Harm) I'm on my way to meet Det. Axelrod.

Harm: Using your human approach?

Meg: That's right.

Harm: Meaning you're wearing a dress.

Meg: Look, don't think you know me that well, because you don't. I'll be so subtle that by the time I work my way round to asking for the file he'll barely notice.

Harm: Is it a red dress?

Meg: *wearing a red dress* No! How's my car?

Harm: Fine. Better yet, no one at the embassy recognized it.

Meg: Look, I just made my first payment, so don't...

Harm: I'll be careful. ~ Meg: Good Luck Harm.

Harm: Aren't you the one who's getting lucky tonight?

Meg: Over and Out. *ends the call and dumps the phone onto her bed.* *both grin*

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 7

Episode Title: Pilot Error

 

Quote:

McKee: Do you find Lt Rabb attractive?

Meg: Uh, Yeah.

McKee: You work together, see him off duty occasionally?

Meg: Uh Yeah.

McKee: Do you sleep with him?

Meg: *obviously slightly embarrassed* Hey, I'm asking the questions.

McKee: Fair's fair Lieutenant ... Let me put it this way, do you think you'd sleep with him?

Meg: Anything's a possibility. 

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 9

Episode Title: Scimitar

 

Quote:

Harm: And Lt Austin?

Lt Dumai: Women are not permitted in Al Matahal.

Harm (to Meg): Sorry

Meg: The hell you are ... Sir.

 

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Harm: I can't protect you.

Meg: I'm an officer in the United States NAVY - I'll protect myself.

Harm: The Colonel thinks date rape is an accepted social practice...

Meg: I've been handling Texas cowboys since I was fifteen, I'll handle Colonel Barzan. Besides it's Corporal Anderson's only chance and you know it.

Harm: I can't let you do it.

Meg: I can.

Harm: Lieutenant...

Meg: Don't give me an order I won't obey, Sir.

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Meg: Are you comparing me to a prostitute Corporal?

Corporal Anderson: Uh ... no Ma'am, I didn't say that.

Harm: I was ... and I meant you were spunky - like her.

Meg: Spunky doesn't cut it, Sir.

Harm: How 'bout pretty?

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 11

Episode Title: JAG: Sightings

 

Quote:

 

Harm: I'm not sure how to write this one up, Lieutenant.
Meg: By the book, sir.
Harm: You really want me to say that you thought it was little green men?
Meg: Just shut up and drive. Sir.

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 12

Episode Title: JAG: The Brotherhood

 

Quote:

 

Harm to Meg: You know, if you date one pilot ...

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 14

Episode Title: Smoked

 

Quote:

Harm (introducing his pal): Lt. Cmdr Jack Keeter, my roommate at the academy and the second best naval aviator I know.

Meg: The CAG being the first, Sir?

 

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Krennick: I'll eat his liver!

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 15

Episode Title: JAG: Hemlock

 

Quote:

 

Krennick: You haven't slept in two days.

 

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Computer Hacker to Krennick: Er, are those real or did you buy them.

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 16

Episode Title: High Ground

 

Quote:

Harm: You still don’t remember him do you?

Gunny: Gunny don’t tell a two star he don’t remember him.

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Meg: Big plans for the weekend ma’am?

Krennick: Not any more.

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 18

Episode Title: Survivors

 

Quote:

Trevor: Do you know what to do if a bear attacks you?

Captain Bradley: Climb a tree?

Meg: Get in your car & drive?

Trevor: Play dead. The bear won't eat you if he thinks you're dead.

Meg: I think I'd have a better chance in my Mustang.

Captain Bradley: Or my tree.

 

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Harm - "... the video ... you did get the video, didn't you, Lieutenant?

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 19

Episode Title: JAG: Recovery

 

Quote:

Meg: Do you fly like that every time you go up Sir or were you just showing off?

Harm: Your first time supersonic Lieutenant?

Meg: No sir, just my first time with a lawyer. 

Harm: How do I rate?

Meg: Could have done without that snaphold.

Harm: I had to leave an impression.

Meg: You could've used a little more of runway.

Harm: You wanna long roll-out, fly the Air Force.

Meg: Uh careful, we're in their territory.

Harm: There are a lot of friendlies around here Meg, the Space Program likes NAVY pilots, we make their best astronauts.

Meg: Right, I think I read that somewhere in Kepler's laws of planetary motion.

Harm: Hey all I need to say is that the first American in outer space was not an Air Force jock, they've put up a man who knew how to make his traps.

Meg: Then why was the first man in orbit a Marine?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 21

Episode Title: JAG: Ares

 

Quote:

 

Kate: Why are you so curious?

Harm: It's my nature

 

 

 

 

 

Episode No. 22

Episode Title: Skeleton Crew

 

Quote:

Lt. Lamb: You think she was being paranoid?

Meg: No.

Agent Turkee: And why is that Lieutenant?

Meg: Because she was murdered.

 

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Admiral: you are very devious Alison…

Krennick: Thank you Admiral

Admiral: And you sat in my chair…

 

 

 

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