Title: Blue No More

Rating: NC-17 for sexual content and hints of abuse.

Setting: Alternate Universe(AU)

Pairing: Dr. Henry McCoy aka Beast from “X-men” and OFC

Legal stuff:  I do not own the X-men, though I wish I did, especially the men…anyway I don’t own them, they belong to the great Stan Lee.  I don’t own Evanescence’s “Whisper” or Daniel Bedingfield’s “If You’re Not the One” though I really wish I did.  Storyline is completely mine, my character is mine and any other person who does not belong in the X-men Universe.  Please e-mail me if you wish to archive this fic so that I can link you on my website or vice versa.

 

 

 

Hank sighed for the fifth time that night, he was having trouble falling asleep.  He couldn’t diagnose the cause but whatever it was it needed to stop or else he will not be of any use to the team members.  He shook his head, he missed coffee, he made himself stop drinking the stuff the first sign of insomnia hit him and it did not stop it any way shape or form.

He heard a scream next door and was out of bed immediately.  He knocked on the door and a very shaken young woman opened it.  She smiled with relief as he stood there and a bit of remorse.

“I’m sorry, Hank,” she murmured still shaken from her dream.

“It is all right, my dear, are you okay?” he asked.

“Nightmare,” she shivered and opened her door more to reveal her bed sheets strewn about, “can’t shake it.”

He felt useless at that moment, not sure what to do with the beautiful woman before him.  He didn’t have much time to think as she flung herself into his furry blue arms and hugged him.  She sighed contentedly as his strong arms engulfed her uncertainly, making her feel safe and warm.

“It was just a dream,” He murmured above her head.

“More of a memory,” she said pulling away slightly to look up at him, her brown eyes looking at him solemnly.

“Want to talk about it?” he queried and she shook her head no.

“I just want to sleep, maybe later?” she paused, “If you don’t mind, over some beverages and its light outside…”

“Of course, my dear,” he replied with a nod and she hugged him again, he wondered why, She probably thinks of me as a teddy bear.

“Can I sleep in your room tonight?  Please?  I don’t think I’ll sleep by myself,” she asked looking up at him again.

“I—well—I don’t know…” he stammered, it was not a response he was expecting but her scared eyes made him relent, “yes, that will be fine.”

“I’m sorry to put you out,” she said pulling away from his safe arms, looking at his blue furry face, “just need to sleep a little or else Logan will kick my butt later on in training.”

“How is training going, Cindy?” he queried curiously, as he led her to the room next-door.

“I guess it is going well,” she shrugged and entered his room, “haven’t had any injuries, that’s always a plus in my book.”

“Yes, I would say that it is going quite well then,” he said with a grin and a nod.

Cindy saw the full sized bed and knew that they would be touching, no matter how hard the giant blue furry man tried not to.  She grinned inwardly, glad she could touch him some more.  She liked the way he felt, if she was really honest she would even say she loved him since she first saw him months ago, but there would be time for that later.

“Does it matter which side I sleep on?” she asked him and saw him looked a bit perplexed.

“There isn’t really a side to sleep on once I’m in the bed,” he muttered scratching his head, “I can sleep on the floor.”

“No, I don’t want to put you out, I’m fine sleeping next to you, Hank, unless you aren’t,” she said starting to get worried.

“No, I don’t mind, Cindy, I just worry I’ll crush you,” he replied truthfully.

“I trust you,” she said and grinned, “Now get in the bed, we have work to do in the morning and need to be in top form, Doc.”

“Okay,” he slid under the covers until he was against the wall, he was very uncomfortable with this.  It had been a long time since a woman shared a bed with him, six years to be exact and he was still hurting from that break up.  He changed beds too, just so the memories wouldn’t be there and the possibility of another woman ever wanting to be with him was minute anyway.

The petite Asian woman slid in next to him, shivering a little and snuggled against him, “Your room is nice and cool, I like that.”

“Thank you,” was all he could say as she moved his large arm to cover her and her leg draped around his own powerful one.

“Good night, Hank, thank you,” she whispered against the soft spot on his shoulder and quickly fell asleep, leaving him to wonder what the hell he was doing before he followed suit.

 

 

                                                ***************

 

 

Cindy looked like a normal twenty something woman, long dark brown hair stopping just below her shoulder blades, with Asian features, there was nothing too special about her except she was a mutant.  She had a kinetic ability, which allowed her to blast plasma energy in streams with her fingertips. 

Professor Charles Xavier, owner of the School for the Gifted, found her a few months ago fighting the deadly Sentinels on her own.  She was melting them; she was certainly a force to be trifled with when angry.  When she was using her incredible power, a power she had little control over, her eyes would take on an eerie violet glow.

He took her in when she collapsed.  She awoke to find a large, blue furred man, hovering above her taking her vitals.  She did the surprising thing and smiled.  Everyone, including Charles Xavier, expected her to freak out, like many mutants had before.  She just shrugged it off and said “It’s not my place to judge on appearances or people’s past” and that was it.

Since then, she moved in with the help of Remy LeBeau, who found her incredibly endearing, and found herself next to Hank’s room.  He was a recluse, spending hours upon hours in his lab or his room, researching or doing experiments.  She knew he had to be a lonely man, she could see it in his gentle blue eyes.

Yeah, Cindy was just an ordinary twenty something with strange powers and a strange desire to be with the gentle blue giant.  She didn’t find any other men on the compound attractive on a spiritual sense, in the sense of the heart.  No, they just wanted her for a good lay, that’s it, a fling for a few months and throw her away.  She knew enough about men to see it.  But Hank…he was different…he was loyal and she loved that about him.

 

                                    ************

 

Hank slept wonderful for the first time in months.  He stretched and stopped when he realized there was a body pressed against him.  That body stretched against him languidly like a cat and slowly sat up.

“Hi,” she said softly, rubbing her eyes, “you sleep okay?”

“I slept wonderfully for once,” he replied propping himself up on his elbows, “I trust your nightmares went away?”

“Yeah,” she smiled and looked at the clock on the wall, “I overslept, oh well, that will just be more fodder for Logan to beat me up.”

“Shouldn’t you hurry?” he asked her, surprised she shrugged the matter off,  Cindy proved to be a very dedicated member of the team, always on time and always eager to work, a trait that Hank could definitely appreciate.

“I should, shouldn’t I?” she mumbled and got out of the bed and shook her head and smiled at him again, “Thank you, Hank.”

“For what?” he asked unsure of what she meant, For being your large teddy bear?

“For protecting me,” she said and left his room quietly before he could respond.

“Yer, late,” Logan growled irritated ten minutes later.

“Sorry,” she shrugged, “nightmare and overslept.”

Logan shrugged indifferently and began their session, “Don’t do it again.”

“Aye, aye Captain,” she replied with a salute, ducking in time to miss his roundhouse kick, while punching him in the side.

She hated hitting him, it was like punching a wall.  All that adamantium made him as hard as a steel boat when doing things like that, but he was great for hugs, or so Jubilee mentioned one night they watched movies.  Cindy could tell the fellow Asian girl liked the old man and she couldn’t blame him.  Cindy liked his feral side, she wasn’t afraid of him like the other mutants except Jubilee.  Maybe it was an Asian thing, they were just too stupid and weird to care.

Cindy sent a zap of plasma at Logan and he dodged it, she growled and faked a right punch and hit him with her left hook.  He growled this time, grabbing her hand and flipped her, in the process breaking her wrist.  She didn’t cry out in pain, too shocked to do that, she just cradled her hand to her chest.

“Shit,” Logan growled and picked her up, “Yer going to be fine, babe, I’m so sorry.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” she murmured against his chest as he took her to med bay.

“Hank!  I need a little help here!” Logan shouted as he laid Cindy on to the examining table.

“What’s going on?” Henry McCoy asked rushing out of his office.

“Hiya, Hank,” Cindy said with a smile, “Logan broke my wrist so much for doing good, huh?”

“I’m so sorry, babe, what can I do to get you to forgive me?” the feral man asked, he didn’t really like hurting people he cared about.

“Take Jubilee on a date already, old man,” she said bluntly, surprising him.

“What?!” Wolverine asked shocked, along with Hank.

“Will you do it?  The whole nine yards, the Wolverine experience?” she asked him impatiently.

“She’s too young!” he finally responded.

“Oh whatever, listen, I’m in pain, and I know you love her like that,” she stated, “I see the way you look at her and she looks at you the same way.  Now if you want me to forgive you, you will quit pussyfooting around and ask her out on a date already!  Go! Do it now or else…or else I’ll zap you!”

“Geez, woman I’ll do it,” Logan said with a groan and shook his head, “I guess you aren’t feeling too bad to yell at me.”

“Nah, I’m in good hands, Hank will take good care of me,” she replied with a grin and looked up at a very surprised Hank, “now go ask her, she’s been trying to get tips from me all this time.”

“Why?” the feral man was confused.

“Why ask why?  Just do it, she’ll tell you,” she said with a wave of her uninjured hand and zapped him lightly, “now go so I can get some help.”

Logan growled as his skin burned a bit, he left them growling under his breath “women, can’t live with them, can’t live without them.”

Cindy giggled slightly, glad that her endorphins were pumping through her system, and shook her head to see Hank still shocked.  She shrugged and said, “I have a high pain tolerance.  So do you need to do surgery?”

“I’ll need to see how bad it is,” he muttered clearing his head.

“Okay,” she said and he brought out a gun type device and pointed it at her left hand.  A few seconds later, an image of Cindy’s bones were on a screen near the head of the examining table. 

She whistled and looked at her arm, “Well, at least he didn’t break my wrist, broke my forearm though.”

“You will need no surgery, it was a clean break,” Henry McCoy said going into his doctor mode.

“Well that’s a relief,” she murmured.

“Do you want pain reliever, Cindy?” he asked as he pulled out his supplies.

“No,” she shook her head, “don’t want that stuff.  I like the clarity of mind over a drugged up one.”

“But you are in pain, my dear,” he said as he took her hand gently into his large soft ones.

“Pain is nature’s way of telling you that you are alive,” she shrugged, “sometimes one needs the reminder, besides I have a high pain tolerance.”

“I need to reset the bone, you’ll be in terrible pain,” he was trying his best to convince her that she needed pain medicine.

“I don’t care,” she was being stubborn, he sighed and nodded grimly, “I’ll be fine.”

“As you wish,” he muttered and yanked at her injured arm and felt the pop of the bone falling back in place. 

Cindy made a soft whimpering sound as pain increased ten fold.  She bit her lip and closed her eyes, squeezing them.  She breathed deeply and let it out slowly, doing it over and over again before opening them to find Hank ready to inject her with pain killers.

“No,” she murmured, “medicine, I don’t like needles.”

“Is that why…” he started to ask.

“Part of it,” she said and he nodded.

He cleaned her arm with disinfectant before he put a plaster on her arm, “Don’t do anything strenuous, no more training, jogging is permissible though.  I can give you a pill.”

“No,” she said, as she got used to the pain, it was bearable now, “I will be okay.”

“You are being stupidly stubborn, my dear,” he said as gently as he could.

“I know, it is an Asian pride I think,” she muttered with a grin, “Jubilee is like it too.”

“Yes, but she never refused drugs,” he murmured looking her in her eyes.

She laughed and said, “I never liked needles, had a bad experience one time.  I tensed and it broke in me and I panicked.”

“Stars and garters,” he said, “that is horrible, that would explain the fear.  But I am a better doctor than that fool. You can trust me, Cindy.”

“I know,” she said with a grin, “I learned to bear the pain and by focusing my mind on other things.”

“Meditating,” he responded with a nod and she smiled.

“Thank you, Hank,” she said and hopped off the table, immediately collapsing, he held her up and placed her back on the table, “whoo, got to remember not to do that again.”

“My dear, you must rest, your body is still in shock,” he said brushing the hair away from her eyes.

“Okay,” she said relaxing against his touch, “care to keep me company?  If you’re not busy…”

“Of course, are you thirsty?  I have some wonderful green tea in my office,” he replied, “then maybe you can tell me about your nightmares?  It isn’t good to keep such things inside.”

“I would like that,” she smiled and watched him disappear.

“It’s lukewarm, I didn’t want you to burn yourself,” he replied as he handed her a cup, which looked ridiculously small in his hands.

“Thank you,” she smiled and took a sip of the tea, “It is very good, where’d you get it?”

“I have a colleague of mine send it to me from China,” he said, “Now tell me about this nightmare of yours.”

“Okay,” she mumbled taking a sip of the tea, setting it down beside her, “my dad was a monster, when he was high on crack, it was night and day with him.  He would beat my mother until she was black and blue.  Then one night I tried to stop him and he choked me. 

Next thing I know, I was in the emergency room with my mom.  I don’t know who called the police, never found out.  They had to give me an epidural, both of my legs were shattered and from what they said, I was screaming in pain then.  That was when the needle broke, not exactly a good spot to have that occur. 

Anyway, I healed, went through physical therapy and was taken out of the house per request of my mother.  She stayed with him and I entered the foster home circuits.  That was what my nightmares are about, usually, anyway.”

“That’s horrible!” he exclaimed finding he respected the young woman all the more, “what happened to your parents, do you know?  Are you still in contact with them?”

“My dad killed her a few months later in a rage induced by coke, then he killed himself with the stuff,” she said wiping a tear away, “so I guess it was good I got out while I still had a chance.  Can’t help but feel I should have stopped him some how, helped him but no point thinking about “should haves” now.”

He wanted to hug her, but was reluctant in doing so, fearing that his cumbersome strength and size would hurt her more.  She smiled up at him and said, “Don’t feel sorry for me, I’m a tough chick, especially if I can take Wolvie’s punches.”

“I don’t feel sorry for you, my dear, I admire your resilience,” he replied and placed a hand on her knee briefly, making her blush a bit.

“So, I can’t get this thing, wet, right?” she asked looking at her cast and then back at him.

“That is correct,” he replied with a nod, “You’ll have to take baths and put a plastic bag on your arm.”

“That sounds like a lot of fun,” she muttered and shrugged, “Oh well, that’s what I get for zapping Wolvie.”

“Why did you ask him to take Jubilee out on a date?” he asked her suddenly and she looked up and grinned.

“I have this penchant of match-making I’m afraid and I just have this strong feeling they would do well to be together,” she replied, “they already rely on each other.  She’s spunky and calming, he is feral and in need of spunk, both of them too stubborn and too worried about “what ifs” I decided to give them a push.  Just hope it doesn’t blow up in my face.”

“I think you were right in your judgment, Cindy,” he nodded, “if things do blow up, I will aid you to the best of my ability.”

“Thanks,” she grinned, “will you be around during dinner?”

“I don’t know, I might be working on something,” he replied absently scratching his head.

“Okay, well, I’ll see you later then,” she said and slowly got up this time, “thank you for the tea, Hank.”

“Thank you for being a wonderful patient,” he grinned, she left him, and he sighed, sudden loneliness filled his very soul.

 

 

                                    *****************

 

Hank was having another night of fitful sleep.  It was beginning to irritate him, that coupled with his loneliness made him very bad company.  Everyone else seemed to be paring off on the team.  Remy and Storm, Rogue and Iceman, Jean and Scott, Logan and Jubilee….that just left him and Cindy, but he was certain she didn’t like him.

She probably thought of him as a teddy bear, a mentor, a friend…nothing special like that.  So maybe she didn’t freak out when she first saw him.  So maybe they did share the bed once and he had the best sleep ever.  So maybe he wasn’t so lonely when she was in his presence…but that didn’t mean a thing, not a damned thing.

He heard her scream and before his sleepy brain could react, a soft knock came on his door followed by a whisper, “Hank?”

“Come in,” he responded, sitting up in the bed, blinking as glowing eyes reached his uncertainly.

“Can I sleep with you?” she whispered staying near the door incase he said no, his only response was to pat the bed.

She shut the door and walked to him, sat on the edge of the bed, “How do you want to sleep, pet?”

“I’ll sleep on your other side, will that be okay?” she asked as she looked at him, not thinking about the nickname.

Hank shifted so there was enough room for her near the wall and she crawled over him, placed his large furry arm around her, while she used the soft part of his shoulder to sleep on.  She snuggled against him, her broken arm weighing lightly against his firm furry stomach.  He pulled the covers around her with his free hand.

“You going to be ok like this, love?” he whispered his voice full of concern.

“I will,” she murmured as sleep started to take over her, “good night.”

 

 

                                    ***************

 

Hank woke up to find himself spooning Cindy from behind, his large hand holding her against him while her wounded arm was cradled against her petite body.  He also came to realize that he had an erection and began to curse his man hood.  He carefully inched his pelvis away from her, wishing nature wasn’t so cruel to him, and she stirred.

He looked at her sleeping form and found he could stare at her all day.  She was beautiful to him, despite the fact she would never love him.  Something did bother him though, the fact he could only sleep when she was around baffled him. 

“Morning,” she said as she slowly sat up using her broken arm to help, “yeah, I must be dumb, keep doing that.”

“Are you all right?” he asked her and she nodded.

“Just stupid,” she said with a grin, “did you sleep okay?”

“I slept fine, did you?”

“No, nightmares,” she said, brushing her hair out of her face, “thank you.”

“Thank you,” he said and she looked at him confused, “I have been experiencing sleeping disturbances for the past few months.  It seems that the only time I can sleep good is when you are here.”

“Oh, ok,” she replied softly, blushing, “same here.”

He blushed, he wasn’t sure what was going on and didn’t get to question, “Hank?  It is Storm, I need to find Cindy, do you know where she is?”

“Duty calls,” Cindy mumbled a bit sad, “I’ll see you later.”

She quickly got out of the bed and opened the door, surprising Storm, “I’m here, what’s up?”

“The children wanted to know if you could teach them origami with your broken arm,” the white haired witch asked not asking about why Cindy was in Hank’s room.

“Yeah, sure, just give me ten minutes to freshen up, okay?” she said.

“Yes, that will be arranged, thank you,” Storm replied with a slight bow, “sorry for the interruption.”

Cindy shrugged and closed the door and looked at Hank, smiling apologetically, “Sorry, have to teach the kiddies how to fold paper.”

“Don’t sound too enthused, Cindy,” he muttered trying to hide his smile.

“I was enjoying the bed,” she shrugged, “Oh well, a promise is a promise that I must keep.  Thank you, for letting me stay here, again…I’ll see you later.”

She left before he could reply, and he was glad that she did because he wasn’t sure what he would have said.  She doesn’t want you like that, Henry, he told himself as he got out of the bed, causing her scent to waft in his nose, stop torturing yourself like that.

 

                                    **************