Scene: Sunny Afternoon. Kenshin's about 11, Hiko's sitting on a rock drinking Sake.
Kenshin's humming to himself, engrossed in the task he has for the afternoon.
He holds up a piece of white cloth. Snap. Snap. "Nice and white." A smile is on his face.
Hiko looks up from his cup (saucer thingee) and his face assumes a horrified expression as he examines the cloth and Kenshin's handiwork. "Nani! Where is the red trim?" He jumps over, literally too fast to be seen with out his cloak, grabbing the cloth from Kenshin and frantically examining every inch of it. He looks down at Kenshin and asks quietly, "Baka deshi, where is the red trim on my cloak?"
"Ack!"
****
Aoshi is fighting Suzaku
Just kicked Suzaku's face when interrupted by a call...
"Tamahome! Suzaku!... No! Suzaku..." a small girl runs into the scene... Her hair is done up in twin buns tied with ribbons. She looks at Aoshi and screams "How dare you?!"
Aoshi looks at her, glances back at the others who are there before turning back towards Suzaku. Saitou turns toward Miaka, with a sigh...
Miaka looks around and spots Saitou, who is preparing to attack her. "Tamahome..." she wails, "These people are wierd..." Miaka adds, reaching to her back and whipping out a large red bound book. She begins to frantically flick through the pages.
"Ack!!! I'm in the wrong show!!! AND I'm on my lunch break!!! ARGH. Wah!" She turns and runs off scene, trailing tears at the missed opportunity to be eating, just as Saitou's gatotsu goes through the air she had been standing in.
"Darn. I missed!"
****
Scene: Sunny Afternoon at the Dojo. Every one is sitting after lunch, although Sano is away on a errand.
The dojo gate flys inwards. Behind it's remains several people can be seen. They are all armed and dressed rather roughly.
Kaoru and Yahiko leap into action, falling into enguard positions, brandishing their bokkens. Kenshin sighs and gets up, walking forward to stand between the pair.
He looks at the intruders, for those who know, his eyes narrowing dangerously. "What do you want, de gozaru yo?"
"Nani? Where is he?"
Kenshin sighs again, and steps forward. "I'm right here."
"Who are you?" The response was general from the crowd.
Kenshin sighs yet again, in a very long suffering manner. "I was the Hitokiri Battousai. If you have a quarrel with me, could we please take it outside. The Dojo has already been rebuilt far too many times."
"The Hito... Who? That doesn't matter. We really don't care if you are some killer from the Bakumatsu! You're not Zanza! We want Zanza! It's his hide we want."
"Oro!"
****
Some More Skits - These ones are written by Sylvia
Imagine this: Shinomori Aoshi's new pasttime... (hehe) One that requires patience, skill, devotion and hours of sitting on your butt.
Misao, Aoshi, Okon and Omasu sitting in a circle and comparing their latest work.
"Look Aoshi-sama! I made you something!" Misao pounced on the passive man.
"Arigato, Misao... that is a beautiful design... of a worm..."
"Worm! That's supposed to be a dragon!" Misao's face then turned apologetic, "Demo... the design was too hard so I had to... heheheh... make a few modifications..."
"It's quite easy actually... let me show you," And with Aoshi proceeded to finish an absolutely breathtaking embroidery of a dragon as well as a red peacock (Eek! FY alert!!). The ladies squealed with delight and admiration at his needlework. Omasu and Okon begged him to make them one as Misao drifted off into a dream world after he gave her the work he had just completed.
"Aoshi-sama, I didn't know that you are so talented!" Omasu commented.
As calm as ever, he replied, "Embroidery requires patience and endurance..." As a demonstration, he picked up a big needle and pricked his fingers without even flinching. Everyone clapped and cheered whilst Okina, peering in through the crack in the door, developed a huge sweatdrop over his head...
Next Time on Scenes you never see in Rurouni Kenshin: Saitou Hajime and his house chores...
****
Imagine this:
Saitou Hajime, otherwise known as the mighty Miburo, stood in the middle of the living room of his Western-styled home. Saitou-sama is wearing his trademark police uniform but over it... he wore a big frilly yellow apron, patterned with BIG... BRIGHT... BLUE pokka dots. Of course, he was still puffing away at a cigarette.
He groaned.
<Why the hell did I forget to wipe my feet again?> was his annoyed thought. He stared dismally at the mess on the new carpet... gleaned out of his meagre salary... muddy footprints which were his handiwork. Or should that be footwork?
Tokio had screamed in horror when she saw what had happened in her immaculate living room. One look from her was enough to make the Wolf in him shiver.
And now it was time to pay for his crime...
Two hours later...
"All done!"
Tokio heard her husband as he congratulated himself on a job well done and flitted into the room... only to be confronted by another disaster.
She narrowed her eyes and glared at the hapless Saitou, who was clueless as to what was causing her agitation.
"Hajime... anata... look at those cigarette butts and ashes all over my new carpet!!"
Saitou followed her gaze. "Oh $%!@"
***
Rurouni Kenshin - special Super Horse filler episode.
With special guest: Vicious horse
The wet red-head, cladded in his samurai attire stumbled up the hill.
Our fearless hero was concerned about protecting his friends and innocent
passengers on the train from listening to the nonsensical tirades of those
filler pirates.... Kenshin spotted a horse grazing in a nearby field. He
joyfully bounded towards his potential mode of transport. After all, he
was human and couldn't possibly catch up to a train. The horse gave him
a disdainful look. Kenshin made a grab for the reins....only to be
greeted by a hoof to his stomach. As he laid gasping for air on the
ground, the horse smirked viciously (like Hajime-sama ^__^ ).......
DIRECTOR: CUT! Saitoh-san will not be appearing until Kyoto arc! Do
I need to repeat myself again?
SUDDENLY GLUMPY SYLVIA: NO FAIR!!
.....and stomped on the unfortunate rurouni.
Sometimes later on........... Sano had been knocked unconscious on the ground. Yahiko and Kaoru fought on bravely but it became apparent that their situations was indeed volatile as they were helplessly outnumbered.
The evil pirates advanced on the helpless trio when suddenly something flew over their heads.
PIRATE #1: It's a BIGGGGG bird!
PIRATE #2: No! It's a plane! (In Meiji Japan? You bet!)
EVERYONE: NO! IT'S SUPER HORSE!
KENSHIN (a huge sweatdrop): No.....it is your humble friendly rurouni,
Himura Kenshin.
SUPER HORSE snorted a disagreement and promptly gave a quick shake
which send our beloved rurouni into the water.
KAORU: KENSHIN! KENSHINNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All the pirates' eardrums were blown out by Kaoru's powerful screech
and they decided that the measly amount of
*censored b/c the author doesn't know Japanese currency* was not worth
a permanent damage on their hearings. They all turned on their heels and
ran for their lives.
KENSHIN (somersaulting stylishly out of water): Evil pirates! Your days
of being an extra is numbered....orooo? Where did they go?
KAORU (drooling over the sight of the wet rurouni, tee hee): My hero,
you save me again!
MISAO: Never fear Himura, Kaoru-san!! Kyoto Onmitsu Oniwabanshu is
here!!! (Aoshi, in his meditation robe, lurked in the background, staring
at the script in his hand).
SANO: Miss Weasel, you're not supposed to be here yet!
MISAO: NANI?! It said right here that me and Aoshi-sama rescue the
helpless Himura and Kaoru-san from the nasty pirates and then we kiss passionately.....(love
hearts for eyes).
SAITOH *appearing from the shadows*: Ahou. You're supposed to be wandering
around Japan looking for that zombie...(turned to look at Aoshi) and you're
supposed to be a lunatic in his trenchcoat.
Aoshi's eyes lit up and he put on his trenchcoat.
AOSHI (tenderly caressing trenchcoat): My love, we shall never be apart
again...
MISAO: My rival is...a...a...trenchcoat??! *banged her head on the
ground, OUCH*
Sano told Saitoh that he's a *censored*.
Saitoh happily puffed on his cigarette, satisfied that he had earlier
secretly eliminate an Aku by the name of Sylvia who told him that smoking
is not politically correct.
While all this was occurring, Kenshin gathered his beloved into his
arms. He gazed deeply into her familiar blue eyes, so full of love and
trust..... Kaoru laid her head on his shoulder......
KENSHIN: Kaoru-dono....
KAORU: Hai?
KENSHIN: Ai...shitte...ORO??!!
Kenshin's head jerked back violently as Vicious Horse started to munch
on his ponytail. The creature thought that it had found the world's biggest
carrot....
KAORU *steam rising from her head*: Why...you...little...
MISAO: Minna, Kaoru's MAD!
Everyone wisely scattered. Vicious Horse was sent flying into the blue,
blue sky by Kaoru's ultimate punch.
KAORU: Now, now, Ken-chan, tell your Kaoru where it hurts.
KENSHIN *grinned wickedly*: Now let's see.....
THE END... (For now. New skits are occasionally written.)