(The scene opens up just thirty minutes before show time and the
fans are beginning to file into the arena. With the building about half
full, a somewhat familiar tune begins to play over the PA system.
Immediately, fans recognize the theme and begin to boo. Their
worst fear comes to fruition as Jack Swagger steps from behind
the curtains and onto the stage. Feeding off the negative energy
from the New Yorkers, Swagger decides to taunt them a little bit by
performing several textbook push ups in front of a couple of obese
locals sitting in the front row. The All American-American slides into
the ring and demands a microphone. At first, when Swagger tries
to speak, he is drowned out by a massive wave of boos that only
gets louder as more and more fans pack into the arena to take their
seats.)
Jack Swagger
I'm Jack Swagger and I happen to be an All Amer...
(Unable to hear himself, Jack pauses and decides to wait for the
hostile crowd to settle down. It quickly becomes apparent that the
crowd isn't going to cooperate so Jack opts to take matters into his
own hands.)
Jack Swagger (yelling)
Hey! Can't you see I'm twying to talk?
(The fans revert from simply booing to a giant 'you suck' chant.)
Jack Swagger (still raising his voice)
I'm Jack Swagger and I'm an All Amerwican-Amerwican!
(Swagger halts once again and smirks before continuing all while
the New York crowd violently express their disdain toward him.)
Jack Swagger (even louder)
I'm Jack Swagger and I'm an All Amerwican-Amerwican-Amerwican!
(His triple pop earns him major heat. Jack then takes it up a notch
as he begins to belittle the New Yorkers themselves.)
Jack Swagger
Do you people understand that? Do you people know what it takes
to be an All Amerwican-Amerwican? Can you people even
compwehend what an All Amerwican-Amerwican is? No! And you
know why? Because you're all a bunch of stupid Yankees!
(Swagger's glowing ego and continuous bragging only further
infuriates the already emotionally charged crowd. Feeling like he
has the crowd in the palm of his hand, Swagger begins his rant
regarding his upcoming match with the Wock.)
Jack Swagger
You know, tonight is supposed to be a historwic night. I mean,
people are going to wemember PWE's debut show for years to
come. And you know what else they're going to wemember? Me
beating the Wock.
(Again, Swagger pauses to take in the atmosphere.)
Jack Swagger
You heard me wight, I said I'm going to beat the Wock and I'm
gonna do it in the center of this wing. Tonight is my opportunity to
make my mark in historwy by spoiling the Wock's big comeback to
Matison Scare Garden. Years from now when people wecall this
night, if they wemember anything thing, it's gonna be me pinning the
Wock one...two...thwee. Smell what I'm cookin?
(Then in addition to ripping Rock's catchphrase, Swagger attempts
to pose like him as well, sticking his chin in the air, and inhaling the
aroma. The antics only solidify Jack's status as the most hated
man in the arena.)
Jack Swagger
You know, on second thought, maybe I'll go easy on the Wock
tonight. I'll need someone to show me awound Hollywood when I
go to the Gwand Pwee and become the first ever PWE Champion.
Make that the first ever All Amerwican-Amerwican PWE Champion.
(With that said, Swagger drops the microphone, falls forward af nd
again begins a small series of textbook push ups, earning him his
farewell heat. The scene closes with Swagger heading back to the
backstage area as the countdown to PWE's first even resumes.)