I've been a Bagrut marker for several years now.  Though the marking is not terribly exciting, once and a while I get some pieces of writing which
liven things up.  I'd like to share with you some of the more, shall we say, creative, uses of the English language that I have encountered during my marking "adventures":
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REWRITES:

1.  Wendy hesitated and this was quite noticeable.

     ANSWER:  Wendy's noticeable was hesitated.

COMPOSITION TOPIC:  "YOU HAVE BEEN ASKED TO MAKE A SPEECH ABOUT ENVIRONMENTAL ISSUES IN ISRAEL:

"The problem is not solved by throwing our garbage to the pubic bin." (Read
carefully)

"The ozone layer protects us from the UV (ultraviolent) rays of the sun."

COMPOSITION TOPIC:  HOW TO MAKE PIZZA:

 "You should prepare the equipment:  a bowel.  In order to prepare a dough,
one should put the floud and water into the bowel and scrumble it with the
spoon."

"It's better to scratch the cheese."

"First of all, you have to take a bull and make a bettel.  This is very
important in order to succeed in doing pizza.  Now you have to catch the
tomato and to put it  into the bull."

"Lest but not least, it is patentally obvious that you sould buy a aggs and
oil and shougger."

COMPOSITION TOPIC:  WRITE A LETTER APPLYING FOR THE JOB OF COUNSELLOR IN A SUMMER CAMP IN ISRAEL FOR YOUTH FROM ABROAD:

 "I was in America several times so I speak fluency English."

"My English is very well, and I know Germany too."

"I am not  teaching English in Ramot H.S., and all my pupils come to insult
with me from time to time."

"I think I possess all qualities necessary for such a job - I'm yang,
intutinizing, and furthermore - I know English."

COMPOSITION TOPIC:  DESCRIBE A PERSON WHO HAS INFLUENCED YOUR LIFE:

 "My grandfather was a gentleman from sole to crown."  (Remember the poem "Richard Cory?")

"He lost his parents in the Holycross."

"She's my raw moder."

CHILDHOOD  DREAMS:

 "I don't have the time or the car to drive to the bitch and to do any
of my hobbies.  So my one and only dream is to live near the bitch but not
just an ordinary bitch, but a bitch in Eilat."