Caroline
(Epoch Four: 1989-1999)
I wanted you to stay.
That didn't mean
To imply
You should remain frozen.
While I define
Unmercifully,
How you've gone astray.
If I chased you away ,
It was only because
I have been poisoned
By an immense fear.
Seemingly free
To your every tear.
While longing to be yours.
Caroline
Many a time
Wishfully
I thought your name.
Waiting, though you never came.
Wondering why
I don't deserve
What can only be given form above.
Even if you decide
In your engaging heart.
I could never be chosen.
In my renewed soul
You will not disappear,
We will never be apart.
Why try to throw my fate
Out in the cold.
Isn't it better not hate
The one you love?
Your beauty
The one inside
Will not be in vain.
When my darkest hours
Turn to days,
I will look your way.
It will serve
As my internal flame.
Ladies and gentleman, place your bets.
While I stumble back to start again.
Weighted down by new regrets,
Not mine or yours but ours.
Maybe one of these days
I will learn how to play
This disconcerting jumbled game.