sitting in the dark
whispering your name to myself
tears building never to be shed
hoping that I will find you
in my dreams
where you love me
and fairy tales prevail
cherry blosoms rain
while my spirit burns
in loving you.
tottering along side the cliff of eternity
wondering how long I can balance
if I should jump
or wait to slip and fall
completely in love with you.
fingers flying over lettered keys
wishing that the words were spoken
longing for his loving touch
planning for days to come
a short remiss from the emptiness inside
loving him from half a world away.
I said it didn't I?
It hurts to wonder
If you
Love me
To risk losing you
By confessing my greatest sin.
Wipe away all of your tears
I wish life wasn't reduced to sorrow
That people didn't feel the need to hurt each other
I wish that life was fair
And everyone had a real live guardian angel
I wish that wishes would come true,
And when you prayed God listened with rapt attention
And that dreams came true
I wish that people could set aside their differences
To make the world a better place
I wish more people beliveved in fairey tales
So there would always be a happy ending
I wish everyone could know the joys
Of vanilla ice cream and a walk in the park on a sunny day
I wish touches were used to heal
Instead of hurt
I wish I could mend a broken heart
I wish that the man in the moon was always looking after us
I wish fairies danced in the trees in july
I wish everyone could find true love
Because maybe if I wish one million wishes
On stars and dandelions and traffic lights
Maybe, just maybe
One day
My wishes would come true.
harking between kindred souls
reaching across all bounds
imagining complestion
spiraling through all time and space
twisting within loves embrace
opening eyes to hopeless days
pretending to be whole
hearing wispers on the wind
earthen voices wail
remembering what was
left to wonder
if he loves me
trading bits across an ocean
so far, too far
and it hurts
to miss him
it hurts. to feel. empty. inside.
having no control over my heart
my love
given grudingly
I would rather hold tight
to the mended shards of my heart
to shelter them
coddle them
to not be hurt time and time again
I hate the waiting
but there isn't anything I can do about it.
I love you
I love you
I love you
I love you
That's all
You need
To know
3am
watching the world
through the smoke curls of a lit cigarette
everything so much more vivid
(less real... but more vivid)
contemplating
the quiet hurts
the small scratches on my heart
(my soul)
only you can hurt me like this
(hurts so good)
only you can touch the parts of me
hidden from the world
(hidden mostly from myself)
hurts too familiar
(too common)
only you can hurt me like like this
(hurts so good)
because I love you
(only you)
because you understand too much
(you just can't see)
it all came about too fast
(the way you hurt me)
too soon
(the way you hurt me)
because you don't understand enough
(not ready)
the small things cut
(too deep)
under my skin
(too deep)
because you just can't see
(too deep)
the way you hurt me
(too deep)
the way things could be
(too deep)
hurts that should push me away
(but it hurts so good)
the way thing could be
(but it hurts so good)
don't speak
I understand more the less you say
(because it hurts so good)
can't rationalize
(because it hurts so good)
too cerebral
(but it hurts so good)
can't think
can't speak
(too deep)
a puzzle I can't solve
(too deep)
so I run
(too deep)
away -- towards -- through -- crashing into you
(and it hurts)
turning away
(hurts so good)
only to find you
surrounding me
inside of me
(hurts so good)
only you can hurt me the way you do
(too deep)
only you can hurt me the way
(hurts so good)
only you can hurt me
(more vivid)
only you
(less real)
only you
(hidden from myself)
only you can hurt me the way you do
(you just can't see)
beacuase I love you
(what you do to me)
worrying my nails and staring at the sky
contemplating life
in its endless possibilities
counting the stars and wondering
if you count them too
I sit
worrying my nails
trying to figure out what I've just done
if I pushed too hard
asked too much
should I love you with everything I have
or sink silently into the shadows
leaving you to yourself
to maybe one dayfond that
you love me as well
I sit worrying my nails
an endless cycle
striving for perfection
always falling short
each attempt only makes it worse
as I try to smooth the edges
with pinking shears.