Today I am going to tell you a story. The thing is, this is not just any ol� story about school. This is not �Johnny went to school, and learned a lot today! Yahoo for Johnny.� No, that is not what this will be about. This is about a different Johnny, a teenager Johnny.
Johnny is in the eighth grade. Not only is he in the eighth grade, but he is also 13 years old. This is a big turning in a boys� life. He is no longer a little kid any more, he is a teenager! From now until the day he turns twenty, the world will treat him differently. He will not be treated as an adult, not as a mere child, but a �teenager.� Companies around the world will spend money advertising to poor Johnny, they will try to get him to buy their brand of clothing, eat their food, to drive their cars�.
Today Johnny goes to school. It is a Friday. Everybody loves Friday�s, I don�t see how anybody could not love Friday�s. Johnny sure feels this way. He proceeds to his first period quite casually, high-fivin� the boys, huggin� the girls with a giant smile on his face, knowing that after today he will be enjoying a weekend!
When he reaches his math class, he sits next to his friend Dan as usual. They start discussing their homework when they are abruptly interrupted by shouting in the hallway. They look out side the door only to find out that the principle is shouting for Johnny from the hall. Johnny thinks to himself why such an honorable man like the principal would be shouting violently in the hallways, and more importantly: why would he be shouting for Johnny?
Johnny gets up, not to the teacher�s noticing, and proceeds out the door to find Mr. Switchenbaoughen approaching him rapidly. He shouts out, �Johnny! Where were you at 5:42 this morning!?�
And Johnny, stifling a laugh for such an absurd question answers rather sarcastically, �In my bed where most people typically are at 5:42 in the morning.� After that remark he realized the rebelliousness in his tone, but forgot about it with the principal�s next remark.
�We have substantial evidence that places you in my office this morning committing terrible acts of vandalism!� Said Mr. Switchenbaoughen. Of course Johnny believed this to be ridiculous, and quickly replied with �What kind of substantial evidence do you have to try to frame me as a teenage criminal?�
Mr. Switchenbaoughen explained that they found a textbook with his name in the cover (which Johnny guessed was one that he lost a while back), a hat with his name in the brim (which was of course the hat that was confiscated by Mr. Switchenbaoughen himself because Johnny persisted to wear it inside), a piece of paper with his name and handwriting on it (which was some homework that had slipped out of his pocket while in the office with a meeting with Mr. Switchenbaoughen), and last, and most curious, a penknife with Johnny�s full name inscribed into the side (which was given to him as a gift from his grandfather which Johnny had no idea how it got there.) Mr. Switchenbaoughen took Johnny�s silence as a sign of guilt, and proceeded to take Johnny into his office, and insisted on calling his parents once he got there. Johnny was at least pleased to know that at least his parents would prove his whereabouts at 5:42 this morning, but when Johnny was asked to come into Mr. Switchenbaoughen�s office after the phone call was made, Mr. Switchenbaoughen had a very curious smile on his face. Johnny, feeling a sense of foreboding was first to break the silence asking what was discussed with his parents. Mr. Switchenbaoughen contently smiled at Johnny, while waving his hand around his desk freely: �Do you see this trophy?� Johnny nodded. �This was a golden apple given to me five years ago for my great service as a principal, because I was able to solve so many different cases of juvenile deliquesce around the school.� Johnny wondered where Mr. Switchenbaoughen was going with this. �As you can see I have cleaned up most of the wreckage that somebody made this morning, but I left this trophy. You will notice if you look closely that it has been smashed, presumably slammed down onto the desk. I am guessing that you want to comment on this?� The upward tone of the tail end of this remark was the only inviting symbol that Johnny had, to discover that this was a question. �Yes,� said Johnny a little nervously, �I would like to comment on this.� Johnny could almost feel the thoughts running wildly in his head, what he could say to try to butter up Mr. Switchenbaoughen. He was still wondering what was discussed with his parents, but he was sure that he could muster his way out of trouble this time. �I notice that somebody, obviously deceitful and clever, was able to do this to your office. But what I also notice, a different motive then the one that you may be examining is that they not only disturbed some of your mere things, but something far more important to you: your pride. You said that you earned that trophy for catching students for various crimes right?� Mr. Switchenbaoughen gave a small grunt of agreement. �Then you obviously should realize that somebody, most likely not a student, has broken into your office to agitated the very thing that you hold onto, the fact that under your leadership, nobody has gone unpunished for a crime that they have committed.� Mr. Switchenbaoughen moved as if he were about to speak, but kept his mouth shut and waved his hand to proceed. �Then, I perceive that you jumped to the quickest conclusion that your mind allowed you to: that it was me who vandalized your office. You know that I have some possible reasons: That hat for instance, that you took from me, the way that I am not always obsessed with keeping rules, but the one that I�m concerned about, is the mere fact that I�m a teenager. Yes, you heard me. There are plenty of people that could have done this to your office, but immediately you pressed towards me, the rebellious, adolescent, immature and juvenile teenager. I�m not sure what you talked to my parents about, but my guess is that you tried to acquire some reason for them to turn against me. Some reason in which you might sway them into telling you what you wanted to hear. Am I correct?�
�Well,� said Mr. Switchenbaoughen, �they merely explained that you were sound asleep this morning, and when I explained the knife they pointed out that your friend Dan had borrowed it and it had never been returned. You are dismissed. Have a great Friday!�