Chapter one hundred:

Jenna was standing in the kitchen, looking out the window.
She had put on her bathing suit and stood in the kitchen wearing a sun dress which was at least two sizes too big for her, even though she had worn it the summer before.

She sighed, wrapping her arms around herself and tugging the fabric tighter to her skin.

Outside, Becky and Zac were frolicking in the water, splashing each other and playing around.

Jenna felt suddenly very self-conscious of herself in a two piece bathing suit.

Normally it didn’t bother her, but all of a sudden, no matter how much she tried to ignore it, she still felt fat. She knew it wasn’t true; after weeks of crash dieting, she was finally somewhat happy with her weight, even if the scale read that she was at least twenty pounds below the average for her height and age.

She was the same size as Becky, but Becky looked much better in a two piece, and Jen suddenly didn’t want to be out there. She didn’t want to put herself in any kind of a social situation where she was nearly naked and on display. Especially in front of Luke.

She shook her head roughly.
Normally it wouldn’t bother her. Normally she was comfortable in any surrounding, fully clothed or not. Normally she felt normal with her weight, having never been viewed as particularly overweight. But for some reason, all of that had changed.

Her stomach gurgled sickly, and she drew in a deep breath to combat the sharp pain shooting through her stomach. She knew it was unhealthy, but she hadn’t eaten anything other than yogurt in over a week.

She felt two arms slip around her, nesting just below her own.

She jumped slightly, backing into a warm body. “Luke!”

“Sorry,” He said softly, his voice near her ear. “You looked pretty deep in thought there; I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“That’s okay… I was just thinking… I don’t really feel like swimming today…”

“Oh. Okay, well, I’ll stay in here with you, and we can hang out. Watch TV or something, you know?” He suggested.

“No! No! You’ve already got your swim suit on, go outside and have a swim. I’ll just watch from in here, okay?”
”Are you sure? It won’t be like I’m abandoning you to hang out with my buddies or anything?”
She smiled. “No, of course not.”

“Alright.” He gently kissed her cheek. “See you in a bit?”

“Okay.”

He disappeared out the sliding door and jogged down the back yard.

Jen closed the door behind him, and watched for a moment, before turning around.

Taylor came into the kitchen, carrying two cases of beer and a box of miscellaneous liquors.

“Whoa! What on earth are you doing?” Jen asked. “Are you going on a binge or something?”

“Not me, no. I’m having a little party here tonight.”

“Little?”

“Alright, a big party here.” He shrugged, noisily setting down his alcohol collection on the counter.

“Does anyone else know?” She asked.

“Not yet. They’ll find out when everyone gets here, though.”

“Great.”

“Oh, and don’t tell Ike, right?”

“Right.” She nodded, and reached a bottle of vodka out of the top box. “Can I have this?”

“Of course.” He shrugged. “That’s what it’s there for. Want to help me bring more in?”

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After spending countless hours standing in Christy’s father’s garage, nursing a beer and listening to her father and brother talk about Christy and various drunken outings, he excused himself to find his fiancé.

He wandered into the house, past Christy’s step mother who had passed out on the sofa, shortly after dinner and after two or three bottles of wine.

He found Christy sitting alone in a tiny bedroom at the very back of the house.

“C? Everything okay?”

“No.”

He crossed the room and sat next to her on the edge of the bed. “What’s wrong, honey?”

She drew in a deep breath, and hugged her knees tightly to her chest. “I really didn’t want to come here. This is such an awful place… and listening to my father and step-mother describe me as a whore all night long…” She stopped and drew in a deep breath, clearly attempting to suppress tears.

He reached over and gently stroked her spine. “Honey, its okay…”

“No, it’s not okay!” She dropped her hands into her lap. “This is my family and they’re so… god, they’re awful, awful people. I would like them to be at my wedding, but not if they’re like this! I’ve spent all night feeling like crap, and in front of you, the only person who’s ever loved me or ever showed me any kind of happiness.”

“Maybe at the wedding they’ll be different…”

“They won’t. This is who they are. Sober or not, they’re horrible people and that will never change.” She sobbed.

Isaac quickly put his arms around her and let her cry into his shoulder. “Honey, its okay… I feel awful. This is all my fault, I made you come here… And they… they aren’t that bad. They don’t really know you either. They don’t know the part of you I love, they just know the way you were on the outside, not the kind and loving person you are inside.”

She sobbed louder.
”I’m going to leave it up to you on whether or not we invite them to the wedding. It’s your decision. They’re still family, though.” He paused and stroked her long dark hair until her sobs subsided significantly. “Do you want to go back to the hotel?”

She nodded and slipped from his arms. “Yeah. Let’s go.” She pushed her tears away with a deep breath, and led the way towards the front door.

 

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