today, friends we will take a look at the wonderful world of mummies.
a billion dollar a year industry, the modern mummy
I'm sure you know what a mummy is, a preserved dead body. The egyptians made some pretty sexy ones, but did you know that you can snort them to get high. A friend of mine, James, came across a half dozen or so mummies at a garage sale and bought them for 2 dollars a piece. A steal! Anyways, we turned most of them into snuff using a coffee grinder. Those coptic cats give you the most heinous buzz.
But wait, that's not all mummies are good for, on friday my parents made me babysit my kid sister but i wanted to go see Emperor Moth, so i called James up and was like, "man, let me borrow one of your mummies." and he was like, "okay, dude." So i let the mummy babysit my little sister and went to the Emperor Moth concert. It was a blast, and when i came home, my parents weren't disappointed at all because there's nothing cuter than seeing a mummy changing a kid's diaper. 