10 minutes later, Brian walked into his modest sized trailer to find 60 people crammed in. As he entered through the door, everyone turned and cheered: “HURRAY FOR BRIAN!!”.
“Bet that bloody Kiwi has something to do with this.” Brian moaned, spotting Zane slipping �10 notes to several people on the way in.
Brian pushed his way to a small fridge and grabbed a bottle of beer for himself.
“Want a drink?” He asked as Jess and Hannah jostled their way in behind him.
“I don't drink.” Jess replied, eyeing the lady next to her who looked suspiciously like a man. “Have you got any soft drinks?”
“You mean mixers?” Brian asked, confused by the idea of not drinking.
“Yeah.”
Brian found her a diet coke in the fridge and passed it to her.
“You?” Brian turned to Hannah. “Oh, I don't drink either,” She said politely. “But I will have a Strongbow, if you have one.”
Brian handed her a bottle.
“Could some of you leave, please?” Brian asked, quite pissed off. “I haven't got room to FART in here.”
A few people reluctantly headed for the door.
“Thank God for that!” Laughed Zane. “Didn't want THEM here. I wonder what STUPID pratt invited THEM?!”
Brian upended a bottle and smashed the end on an annoying camera man's head. He lunged towards Zane with it, jabbing.
“Wow man! This part has got way too radical for me!” Zane cried, trying to keep his dignity whilst running out, whimpering.
“Great!” Brian put the bottle down as several people exited the trailer very quickly. He sat down on a chair and relaxed.
There was a tapping on the trailer door and Hannah got up eventually to answer it.
“Hello?” She peered out and went rather still.
“What's the matter?” Jess inquired, standing up and looking over Hannah's shoulder. “Oh…” Jess looked over at Brian. “Mind if Keanu Reeves comes in your trailer?”
Brian laughed until he cried. Then stopped. “Yeah, sure!”
“Is she ok?” Keanu, actor and star of The Matrix asked as he slipped past the rock-solid statue-like Hannah.
“Yeah. Just a bit star-struck.” Jess explained, pulling her in and sitting her on a chair.
“Right.” Keanu Reeves regarded Hannah with suspicion before sitting down next to Brian.
“I didn't know that you knew each other!” Jess exclaimed.
“Yeah.” Said Brian, taking a swig of his drink. “Keanu was in The Matrix, with Hugo Weaving who was in the Lord of the Rings with Orland Bloom, who was in Black Hawk Down with Ewan McGregor, who was in Velvet Goldmine with me.”
“Oh.” Said Jess, feeling stupid. “Of course.”
“K-K…Keanu!” Hannah toppled over to the floor.
“You'll have to excuse her.” Brian grinned. “This is Jess and that's Hannah.”
“Natalie.” Came a voice from the floor.
“Sorry – Natalie.” Brian corrected himself.
“Cool,” Said Keanu, taking a coke from Brian (he's a Buddhist, you know). “You're not psycho Matrix fans, are you?!” He laughed.
“…Uh…heh…NO, of COURSE not…” Jess started, thinking of the 2 Agent Smith posters and several Matrix DVDs she had at home.
Hannah finally got up from the floor.
“'Ello.” She said, smiling at Keanu. “Keeeeeanu!”
“Oh, dear God.” Jess smacked a hand to her head.
“Eep.” Hannah sat back on the chair and tried to regain some composure. What she needed was for someone else to make a fool of themselves to detract attention. “I just have to make a phone call…” She slipped out.
“So, what have you been up to old chap?” Brian asked.
“Nothing much.” Keanu said. “I'm angry because someone who had a New Zealand accent rang up and said Dogstar had a headlining slot today as long as I did an interview for them…” Keanu trailed off and grumbled.
“Ok!” Hannah burst into the room. “Jess! Not to surprise you or anything…but here are some old friends!!” She opened the door and allowed several people to walk in.
“ELIJAH!” Jess's mouth fell open. “DAD! I mean…DOM!” Jess leapt up. “BILLY!” She clutched onto the sofa for support. A final person entered the trailer. Jess fainted.
“Oh, hi, Sean.” Hannah smiled evilly. Her plan was going PERFECTLY – Jess was making a total tit of herself.
“So, Keanu,” Hannah looked at her newest fancy man. “How YOU doin'?”
“Erm…ok.” Keanu replied. “How about you?”
“Oh, I'm great. I'm fine.”
“So, do I call you Hannah or Natalie?” Keanu asked.
“Natalie. I AM Natalie.” Hannah replied.
“Oh.” Keanu looked at her. “Aren't you going out with Daniel Johns from Purple Sofa?”
“You can call me Hannah.” Hannah said suddenly. “And it's SILVERCHAIR.”
“Heehee!” Jess giggled from the floor.
“Oh, thank God! I was worried about you!!” Dom petted.
“You were?” Jess inquired, looking up and fluttering her eyelashes.
“Just what is their relationship?” Keanu asked, confused.
“God knows,” Hannah said, sitting down.
There was another knock on the trailer door.
“If that's the Kiwi, he dies.” Brian said, picking up the bottle.
“You shouldn't show so much outward rage.” Keanu advised.
The trailer door opened and a security man popped his head in. “5 minutes until you're due on stage Mr Molko.
“Bloody hell,” Brian exclaimed. “Time flies…” He got up and pulled on a jacket.
“Do you lot want to stand at the side of the stage and watch?” The security man asked looking at the disarray of people in the trailer.
“Eeeeee!” Hannah leapt up and clapped her hands together. “Yes! Yes-yes-yes!” She paused and looked at Keanu, who had raised an eyebrow. She cleared her throat. “I mean…yes.” She regained her composure. “Yes, I'd be delighted.”