to Daniel Radcliffe... For saying that no-one in space likes you.

to Jamie Oliver (MBE)... For making you ever-so-slightly pompous over your MBE and also for being nasty to you; forcing you to make 10,000-odd curries.

to Grant Nicholas... For making you an object of Hannah's "desires".

to Natalie Imbruglia... For being very b*tchy to you. You don't deserve it at all...but if you do continue to read (not sure why you would), things get better between you and Hannah...

There are more apologies to come...you didn't think we'd offended this few a people, did you?!