Hannah replaced the receiver and turned to Wills with a look of desolation on her face.
“Not only has she buggered off to Scotland, but she's buggered off out of the house, too!” She moaned.
“I'm sure they just nipped out…” Will offered, diplomatically.
“Nipped out, my arse. She's gone to Gretna Green. I know it…”
“HANNAH!” A voice came from the crowds.
“What was that? Was that someone calling my name or someone talking crap in Spanish?” Hannah asked.
“Well, I don't know.” Will replied, fluffing his quiff.
“HANNAH!” Chris burst triumphantly through the crowd. “I've been looking EVERYWHERE for you!” Chris looked at Will. “Who's this?”
“My next husband.”
“What?”
“Willy – future King of England. Say hi to Chris – future divorcee.”
“What?”
“Shut up and shake the man's hand, Christopher.”
Chris and Will shook hands stiffly.
“Have you managed to find us some help?” Chris asked Hannah. “Or, have you been too busy.” He eyed Will suspiciously.
“I've been trying to get hold of Jess but I can't find her.” Hannah scowled. “And I tried Daniel.” She paused. “He's a useless BASTARD.”
“I tried to find some sort of foreign advise bureau, but there don't seem to be any.” Chris shrugged.
“Are you surprised?! You think tourists come here?!” Asked Hannah sarcastically.
“Well, we might as well do something good to pass the time…” Chris said.
Hannah grinned – they were in a market place, broad daylight in a foreign country with a weak currency – there was only one possibility - hijacking! No, only kidding, SHOPPING!”
“Let's buy, Chris.” Hannah smiled.
“Does he have to come?” Chris moaned.
“Look, I wouldn't submit anyone to the torture of this foreign country. Plus, he's the future King – look snappy.”
They wandered off through the stalls of hand-made jewellery, silks and spices. Hannah thought it was just like a geography video. When they were looking at a picture sale, Hannah leant over to Chris said: “At least you're not wearing those horrific cropped trousers and sandals from hell.”
“How did you know about that?” Chris asked. “That was 2 years ago after Rock In Rio!”
“Mmmhmm.” Hannah nodded.
“Did you used to stalk me?”
“You wish.” Hannah scoffed. “I saw the evidence – those pictures in the Llama Appreciation Society newsletter.” She picked up a nice looking picture of a beach and gave it to Chris to hold.
“That's for members only that newsletter!!” Chris cried. Then it suddenly dawned. “YOU'RE A FAN!!”
“Stop pretending you never knew.”

“WOW. Your house is huge!” Jess exclaimed, looking up at Elijah's LA home.
“Thanks.” Elijah unlocked the front door and they went inside. On the wall there were several pictures of Elijah, Sean, Billy and Dom surfing in frames.
“NOW I know where you get it from.” Jess muttered to Dom as they went inside.
“Right. Who wants drinks?” Elijah asked as they entered the kitchen.
“Me!” Everyone chorused at once. Jess walked over to the nearest window and stared out. She wondered where Hannah would be now…the Bahamas? Australia? Florida? Rio De Janeiro? No, thought Jess – that would just be stupid.
“Jess?” Jess turned around to see Elijah clutching a glass. “Drink?”
Jess took the glass.
“Thanks.” She sniffed it suspiciously. “It's not alcoholic, is it?”
“No.” Jess took a mouthful. “You're mad enough without being drunk.”
“What?”
“Nothing.”
Suddenly a deafening “RRROO!” sounded behind her and she turned to see Dom holding an air horn.
“Elijah, I love your house.” Dom went back into the spare bedroom, closed the door and another “RRRROO!” sounded.
Jess was almost bowled over by a really tiny woman who came in the front door and walked quickly across the living room and straight into Elijah's bedroom. After a few minutes rustling inside it she reappeared carrying a towering pile of dirty clothes, the top of the pile had a shirt with grass stains on it. The old woman walked out of the front door and shut it without a word.
“Who the hell was that?” Jess asked Elijah, who was calmly sitting on a long white sofa reading a newspaper. “Please tell me you didn't just get robbed by a minute old lady.”
“No, that was my mother, she lives next door. She's just doing the Monday washing.”
“Oh, right.”
“So when's your mad friend coming back?” Continued Elijah, moving on rather embarrassingly from his mother.
“When she's spent all her husband's money, probably.” Jess sighed.
The phone on the coffee table beside Elijah rang and he picked it up.
“Hello? Yeah, sure, just a minute.” Elijah looked up at Jess. “It's for you.”
“Who is it?” Jess asked, shocked.
“Some guy called Daniel?” Elijah handed an open-mouthed Jess the phone.