Disclaimer: Please Save My Earth belongs to Saki Hiwatori and a bunch of other people whose names I don't know. These characters don't belong to me, and I in no way claim them. (Except maybe Issei, he's such a sweetie and I think he gets jipped, at least in the anime) So Please Save My Okane! Don't sue me, ne? ^_^

Oh, and before I forget. . . this fic was inspired by the song "Song Without a Song" on the domestic image soundtrack, but the name just didn't fit the fic. I'd heard someone translate the title of the song as "The Song You Don't Sing", and that made more sense, since I was going for an "unspoken words" feel. Also, if you like, hate, or whatever this fic, I beg you, e-mail me!([email protected]) All comments and criticism will be appreciated (and I'll try to write you back, too) although flames will just be used to burn my Geometry book.

And one more thing before we get this show on the road, this fic has a mild SHOUNEN AI warning attached to it. So if you're uncomfortable with a guy being in love with another guy, you probably won't appreciate this much. (And you're a silly person! Biiida!)

The Song You Don't Sing

A Please Save My Earth fic By Issei no Miko

Sahjareem, it was a beautiful day.

Issei stared up at the sky, almost too intensely blue to look at. The air was crisp, warm but with the lingering coolness of the receding winter. He closed his eyes. Perfect. Only one thing

missing. . .

"Oi! Issei!"

He smiled without opening his eyes. Speak of the devil. Or not, he'd sensed the other boy's approach long ago. He turned around to greet him, still smiling. "Ohaiyo, Jinpachi."

Even here, in the crowded schoolyard, the name was sweet on his tongue, with a faint shadow that whispered of another name in another time--

Gyokulan. . .

Jinpachi raised an eyebrow. "You're in an awfully good mood for so early in the morning."

The dark-haired boy shrugged, gestured into the blue eternity above them. "How could you be in a bad mood on such a beautiful day?"

Jinpachi stuck his hands in his pockets as they began to walk toward the building. "I dunno. I guess I didn't really notice."

Issei eyed his friend carefully, reading but not probing. He could feel sadness, jealousy, longing and knew what it meant. "Sakaguchi-san again?"

When the other didn't respond, he sighed. Sometimes he really disliked that girl.

Well, not really, he thought that she was actually very sweet. Like Mokulen. It wasn't her fault that Gyokulan had loved her in their past lives, and now Jinpachi loved her in this one. . . but sometimes it just didn't seem fair.

But now that he thought about it, it really wasn't very fair to Jinpachi either, since she belonged to Shion in both lives.

He frowned. So many things. . . . Another lifetime later, and nothing had changed between any of them. Too much carried over from the past into the present.

When he'd first started having the moon dreams all those years ago, Enju had slowly become a part of him. Until he couldn't tell anymore where Issei left off and Enju began. Until he could no longer remember what it was like to be just Issei.

Until their feelings for Jinpachi and Gyokulan were one and the same.

"Now who's in a bad mood?" Jinpachi teased, breaking him out of his reverie.

Issei glanced at him, almost annoyed with him for spoiling his perfect morning mood. Almost, but then Jinpachi grinned at him, and he felt himself melt a little inside, and smiled back. "I was just thinking."

"'Bout what?"

Issei watched a group of upperclassmen playing basketball out of the corner of his eye, and felt a pang of sadness. There was a time when he would have, could have told Jinpachi anything, and he'd have answered the simple question in a flash. But that was before, when he'd been just himself, and now he was also Enju, and his heart held Enju's secrets.

Sometimes, he hated her.

"Nothing," he replied quietly, looking down at his shoes.

He didn't see the sideways glance that Jinpachi gave him. Issei's been like this ever

since. . . but he said that was a joke. You didn't stay upset over jokes, did you? But if it wasn't a joke, that meant. . . .

Jinpachi's sudden flash of nervousness and uncertainty had Issei looking around for Sakaguchi-san. Odd, usually he could feel her approach; beneath her shyness, she radiated Mokulen's love for the Earth. Just one more thing that hadn't changed.

But now, thinking of it, he wondered: just how much had changed? Mokulen was still beloved by Shion and Gyokulan. Shukaido was still quiet, and resentful of Shion. . . though perhaps more afraid of him now. Hiragi was still the leader, and still the one who was detached from the whole thing. Shusulan remained his confidante in things concerning Gyokulan. Shion was still the same, just in a younger body, and he still held Mokulen's heart, still guarded it jealously. Gyokulan still loved her anyway.

Issei snorted sardonically. Certainly his feelings for Gyokulan remained infuriatingly unchanged.

So. There it was. Seventeen years later, and not a thing had changed. Strange, how they had dragged their past lives into their present ones almost without realizing it. He wondered if everyone did that, even if they didn't know what their past lives had been.

Jinpachi glanced at his friend nervously. Issei was lost in thought, frowning faintly, crossing his arms in that particular way he had. Funny how he'd never noticed how much he moved like Enju. Had it always been like that?

Why hadn't he ever noticed before?

"Issei. . . ."

"Hai?" Issei swung his head to look at him, and Jinpachi caught his breath.

The face, the body, the hair was all Issei's. But the eyes. . . and the nervous, sorrowful hope that filled them. . . .

"Enju?"

"Gyo-Gyokulan!" Enju jumps to her feet, long hair swinging around her shoulders. "What are you. . .I mean, what. . . ." she trails off, cursing herself and the tears on her face.

Gyokulan stands in the doorway uneasily. "I thought I heard someone crying. I came to see if you were all right."

She cannot quite suppress the look of hope that spreads over her face, like the sun after a rainstorm. "You. . ." she seems to shake herself. "I'm fine. Really, it's nothing."

"But-" he begins, and she cuts him off with an airy wave of her hand.

"I just. . .well, you'll need to get back to your post. Mokulen will need your help." Gyokulan can't hear the edge of bitterness in her voice any more than Enju can keep it away. Blind as he is, however-

"I'm worried about you," he murmurs.

She looks up again, tear-filled eyes sad and hopeful all at the same time. "Oh, Gyokulan."

"Jinpachi?" Issei was looking at him curiously, head cocked to one side. The moment passed. Jinpachi started. "Oh, uh. . . ."

A faint smile flitted across the darker boy's face, the whisper of happiness that could only die-

why did it always end in sorrow. . . ?

"You looked like you were somewhere else for a minute."

"You could say that," he muttered. What he had left unspoken lay in the air between them, weighing it down.

"Jinpachi. . ."

"A. . . ano. . ." They both started, and turned. Sakaguchi-san stood looking up at them uneasily, squinting slightly in the bright sunlight. "Ohaiyo," she said in her soft voice, a slight smile hovering over her lips. Her essence broke over Issei like a wave, filled with love and light and innocence. . . he had a sudden mental image of her cradling the Earth and all the creatures on it in her arms, as though she could heal all the world's problems with the glow of her smile.

Sometimes it was easy to see why Jinpachi loved her.

---<---@

The part of him that was Enju kept turning to look in Jinpachi's direction and Issei had to struggle to keep his eyes on the board. More often then not, the teacher would catch his eyes wandering and immediately ask him a question on whatever they were studying, and since he hadn't read the assignment the night before he wanted to avoid that. Of course you didn't read the assignment, baka, you were to busy daydreaming about-

"Nishikiori-kun? Did you hear what I said?"

"Se-sensei?"

And on it went until the end of the day, when he somehow found himself walking home with Jinpachi. There didn't seem to be much point in it, because they walked in silence, but Issei clung to the small comfort that the other boy was still willing to walk with him. Something was bothering Jinpachi, he didn't even have to be a telepath to tell that, but he didn't know what it was or how to ask.

He wondered how things could seem so hopeless on such a beautiful day.

---<---@

He was dancing.

[Who is there? Who?]

He'd never felt so light before. The world was awash with gold and blue, and it was jubilantly beautiful.

[Voices without sound, do you hear?]

His heart was full of music that he'd never heard before. Perhaps his partner knew it. She was foreign and utterly familiar, and she smiled without looking at him. She seemed to understand. . . .

[Are you ready?]

He smiled back at her.

[Not yet.]

They spun and plummeted from the golden sky, entwined like lovers.

[Falling star]

He'd never danced like this before. It wasn't even dancing, was it? He kept catching snippets of things, bits of conversation and memory. But each time he tried to pursue them, she pulled him back.

[Are you ready? Are you ready?]

[In your hands. . .]

He turned away from the elusive memories, dancing jewel-like beyond his reach.

[Not yet, not yet]

And they soared upwards. He was. . . flying. . . . The sheer joy of the sensation made him dizzy.

[The song of stars

Drifting in deep mind

Tells you the time.]

They broke apart and twirled away in separate directions.

[Dreams to be found

On which stars?]

He could feel the images there, they flashed through his mind like lights. But they filled him with an aching sadness, so he pushed them away.

[Tears fall down. . .]

She reached out to him and their fingers laced together, tingling with the shock of the contact.

[Purely reaching to you. . . the song

Remember this color, don't you?]

She took off, pulling him along, and they ran without touching the ground or even breathing.

[Are you ready?]

He swung her around in a circle effortlessly, and they whirled together, heads thrown back.

[Not yet.]

When they slowed, they embraced warmly. She looked up at him at last and he wasn't shocked to see his own eyes in her face. Enju smiled gently.

[Yes, you knew. . .]

She put hands to his face, questioning.

[Are you ready? Are you ready?]

He grinned, understanding.

[Yes, I remember.]

[I'm ready, I'm ready.]

She closed the distance between their faces and their lips touched chastely.

[Wandering alone, these days

Searched for everywhere]

The memories exploded inside him, a flood of images that threatened to overwhelm. He was saturated in emotions; sadness, joy. . . and a love that overpowered them all.

[The song of dreams from

That shining star]

Enju wept, and Issei understood.

[Not alone, anymore.

The time sings

Cuddling you in its arms.]

They clung to each other, rotating slowly in the air, so close that it was difficult to tell where one left off and the other began. She raised her face, and he felt her essence. . . .

[Beyond your memories you can see]

His heart stung with her broken dreams and. . .

[You can hear the song that you don't sing]

She faded, falling into him, became part of him.

They were one and the same.

---<---@

Issei woke up abruptly, drenched in a cold sweat. What was THAT? It hadn't been like any moon dream he'd ever had before. He'd seen everything, Enju's entire life and being in an instant. No wonder he was shaking. It had been sharply real and sweetly dreamlike at the same time, which only made matters worse because the two didn't make any sense existing so closely entwined.

Calm down, he told himself. It was just a dream.

But it hurt. . . .

He wondered if he could tell Jinpachi about it. He didn't think he could describe it. He looked up at his bedroom window pensively. The sun was already shining brightly, and with a start he realized that it was Saturday. But before he'd had time to contemplate this new fact, the phone downstairs rang.

"Issei! It's for you!" his mother called. "Are you up?"

"Hai!"

---<---@

"Hello?"

Sahjareem, you sound just like her. How could I have missed it?

The soft, musical voice took on a puzzled quality. "Hello?"

"Oi, Issei?"

Issei blinked. "Jinpachi?"

Jinpachi gritted his teeth. He could hear the echo in his mind. . . same tone, same feeling: Gyokulan?

"Jinpachi? Are you there?"

"Ah- yeah." He tried desperately to organize his thoughts, or even to understand why he had called in the first place. It had been like an automatic reflex; the moment he'd woken up he'd headed for the phone. "Well, uh-"

But Issei beat him to the punch. "You know, I had the strangest dream last night."

Blink. Jinpachi took in a deep breath. "A dream? So did I." He laughed nervously. "Actually, that was why I called."

Issei was silent for a moment, stricken. Then, "about Enju?" He already knew the answer, and his voice was quiet and heavy.

"Yeah." Jinpachi wondered why he was suddenly so embarrassed for Issei's sake. That dream. . . it had been intimate, a deeply personal glimpse into Enju's soul. . . but it was still just a dream. And his best friend, he was Issei now, not the strange sad woman that--

--that still haunted his blue eyes.

And suddenly, he understood, and he nearly threw the phone down.

God, Issei. . . why?

But he already knew why. He had seen the distorted reflection of himself, of Gyokulan in Enju's memories. He had felt the intense emotion that had flooded her.

And Issei. And Issei was. . . .

"Jinpachi?"

Gyokulan?

Oh, Sahjareem-sama.

"Issei," he said, but his voice was choked. Suddenly, there wasn't enough air in the room; he couldn't breathe, couldn't recapture his sense of self in a swirl of thoughts and emotions that weren't his at all. He needed to get out of there. He needed to think.

"Issei-- I need to. . . can you. . . ." He floundered and felt himself drowning.

"I'll meet you at the bridge in the park." Issei's words sounded rushed, almost breathless, but Jinpachi clung to them for dear life.

"H-hai."

There was a click, and Jinpachi was left alone in the strangling silence.

He rested his forehead on one hand, and tried to force away the sudden awareness that had burst onto his psyche. There was no way to do so, however. The floodgates had been opened, and every thought and idea that he had so carefully suppressed since Issei had. . . kissed him on the roof that day was coming back in full force.

He understood, and all hell was breaking loose.

Oh god, oh god oh god oh god oh god. . . .

Issei was waiting for him. What was he going to say? What could he say?

No, the real question was, could he even face Issei now?

It didn't matter so much what he said, Jinpachi thought dimly. After all, he'd been talking for weeks now and really saying nothing. It wouldn't be so hard to continue doing the same as if nothing had changed.

The problem was, now he realized that he'd been saying nothing. Now he realized that what he'd really been doing was avoiding an actual conversation with Issei, since such a conversation might lead to them talking about what had. . . .

Jinpachi swallowed, and could suddenly taste Issei's lips on his.

. . . about what had happened between them. He had felt the distance growing in their friendship. Had even been grateful for it at the time. After all, real friends had conversations.

So that distance was as much his fault as Issei's. More so, because he had muted every thought of the change in their relationship. And now, looking back, he realized that every time he had looked into Issei's eyes after that, he had seen glittering awareness beyond them.

Issei was waiting for him.

He couldn't face that awareness now.

---<---@

Issei stood on the bridge for a long time, staring into the water. He knew, had known after the first fifteen minutes had passed, that Jinpachi was not going to come. But he waited anyway. There was always a chance, after all. No sense in being pessimistic about it.

The minutes ticked by, turned into hours. Issei watched the sakura petals drift on the breeze. One wafted down, pitching gently from side to side, and landed delicately on the water; ripples shimmered outward from the point of contact.

So many ripples for such a light touch.

"It was too much to hope for," he whispered, and wondered why that should hurt so much.

---<---@

Jinpachi watched him for a seemingly eternal moment, watched the sakura petals sweep around him, showering him with ignored caresses. Leaning against the railing of the bridge, Issei posed a picture that was both poignant and startlingly beautiful. Jinpachi was transfixed, his whole attention anchored on the way the dark hair fell just barely over his eyes, the finger that traced random patterns on the railing, the sky-blue eyes that stared down into the clear water below them, filled with something that reached so deep it made Jinpachi's heart ache.

He forced himself to turn away, leaning heavily on the trunk of the tree he stood under. Had he ever really seen his best friend before this?

No, came the whispered reply. Because before you did not really want to see.

Jinpachi started at the touch in his mind, as light as the caress of the sakura petals. He jerked his head up and his eyes met Issei's in a contact that seemed almost electric.

"How long. . ." he breathed, finding himself unable to finish the phrase.

"Since you arrived," Issei murmured, so softly that Jinpachi wouldn't have caught it if it hadn't have been echoed in his soul. "I felt your approach."

"Then why-"

"I didn't think you'd stay."

The words stung all the more because Issei didn't mean them to. Because they were spoken with such absolute honesty.

"Issei. . . ." Jinpachi tried to collect his scattered thoughts. "I. . . I dreamed of her. . . I saw her mind."

Issei smiled a strange, fragile smile. "I know."

That's all? "I know?" That's all he's going to say? He felt a rise of irritation that was more habitual than anything. He didn't like feeling this vulnerable, as if Issei was hearing his every thought when Jinpachi had no idea what Issei himself was thinking.

"So. . ." he ventured, having no idea what to say at this point.

Issei bit his lip. He didn't know what he had hoped to gain from this. There was nothing he could say short of spilling his heart out to the other boy. He feared that if he started talking, he wouldn't be able to stop.

But you already know, don't you? Otherwise why would you have that look of understanding in your eyes?

"Why did you wait?" Jinpachi asked suddenly, his throat tight because he already knew the answer. "I'm almost two hours late."

Issei looked down a bit, almost shyly. "I thought maybe if I waited long enough, you'd come even though you didn't want to."

Jinpachi could only stare at him for a second, feeling a prickle of fear run down his spine. Fear and something else that he suppressed with an all-too practiced ease. . . . "But you. . . you stood here for two hours?"

Issei turned away, back toward the river, and Jinpachi felt the moment of honesty slip away. "It's a nice day to be outside, after all," the dark-haired boy said stiffly.

No, don't, something in Jinpachi protested. Don't pull away yet!

"Listen, Issei-"

"You don't have to worry about it, Jinpachi." Issei had turned back to him, his eyes sad and accepting. "Just. . . just forget you ever had the dream. It's okay."

Jinpachi blinked. But it's not okay. . . . he thought weakly. "Just like that? Forget about it just like that?" He shook his head. "I don't get it, Issei." That familiar anger was rising in him again. "Why are we here, if you just want me to forget about it? Why did you wait?"

The empath looked almost stricken. He'd thought Jinpachi'd be relieved to be alleviated of the burden of worrying about it. Like last time. . . I thought it would be like last time. I thought he'd. . . .

Why doesn't he want to forget?

"What's all this for, then? Don't you think that damned dream served a purpose?!"

Issei's eyes went wide. "Jinpachi. . . ."

Jinpachi almost choked on his words. Served a PURPOSE?! What the hell are you saying?! I mean, sure, this's the first time we've actually talked in. . . . Realization struck him. A purpose. It did serve a purpose. Jinpachi, you idiot. . . .

At the same time Issei absorbed this information, and his heart began to pound. The dream!

They stared at each other, amber locking on pale blue.

It made you see.

"So." Issei said softly.

"So." Jinpachi replied. He took a step closer, his breath catching in his throat. "How long have you. . ." he couldn't finish the sentence, but he didn't have to.

"I don't know," Issei admitted. "I don't know when it happened. It just. . . snuck up on me, you know?"

"Yeah." Jinpachi's voice was rough. "I know." It was the same way for me, with Sakaguchi-san, after all. Somehow, that just disconcerted him more.

Issei watched him for a minute, feeling the confusion radiate off him. "I'm sorry," he offered feebly, knowing that it wouldn't do any good. "For what it's worth, I never meant for this to. . . ."

Jinpachi nodded slowly, brushing hair out of his eyes. "It's not your fault. If I hadn't have been such an idiot about the whole thing-"

"No," Issei cut him off. He seemed to be doing that a lot. "I never should have forced it on you the way I did."

"Well, still. . . you did try to brush it off. . . that must've been hard for you." He couldn't believe they were having this conversation. It felt so damn weird. . . but then again. . . . It's nice to talk to him again. Jinpachi was suddenly besieged with the recognition of just how much he had missed his best friend.

Issei swallowed hard. Jinpachi. . . Jinpachi was finally understanding. Thank you, Sahjareem-sama. "I-I thought that if I didn't. . . you wouldn't. . . ."

Jinpachi saw the hurt in Issei's eyes and felt guilt wash over him. "Issei. . . ." he said softly. "I'm the one who should be sorry."

Issei's eyes widened again and for a horrifying second he thought he would cry. He's. . . he's apologizing?

"For all that I freaked out. . . I've really missed you," Jinpachi continued quietly.

"Jinpachi," Issei whispered, and suddenly they were in each other's arms without either consciously realizing that they had moved.

"I'm sorry, Issei," Jinpachi breathed fiercely into the other boy's silky black hair. "I'm as blind as a bat and I. . . I never meant to. . ." to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you, not you. Not when I cared this much. . . .

"It's okay," Issei murmured, his voice muffled in Jinpachi's shoulder. I think I understand now.

They stood there for a long time, bathed in silence that wasn't really silence. They didn't need to speak the words to hear them after all.

Owari

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