Inomi sat in the grass and watched the sky. She had been doing this for several hours now and so far it had shown no signs of changing. Before that, she had watched the grass. That had been equally boring, but she found it kept her from doing something she very much didn't want to do.

It kept her from thinking.

Inomi didn't like to think. She tried to avoid it as much as possible, in fact. She especially hated thinking when she was upset.

She had the feeling that if she started thinking about this situation, she'd get very upset. So she watched the sky instead.

When she'd first found herself here, she'd ranted and yelled at the empty field a lot, until it became clear that it wasn't doing her any good. So she'd cried instead, which didn't really do her any good either except that it made her tired enough to sleep. But when she slept she kept dreaming of hearing Vale call her and not being able to answer him or find him, and when she woke up she felt worse than ever.

She dropped her eyes from the endless sky in defeat. She was scared and lonely and she didn't know where she was or why or how long she'd been there.

And she was alone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hours passed. At least, it seemed like hours. Actually, it seemed like days, months, an impossibly long time, but she guessed that it was hours. She got up and started walking. This damn field had to end eventually, right? Right. Sure. She couldn't be that far from the hotel. She'd just keep walking until she got back. . . .

Unless she was walking in the wrong direction.

She stopped very suddenly and looked back the way she'd come. It looked exactly the same as every other direction: desolate and monotonous. She sat heavily in the grass. Maybe walking back wasn't such a good idea after all.

I'm going to die here. . . of starvation or thirst or. . . .

Or what?

She stopped thinking about that. That was stupid. She wasn't going to die here, people knew she was gone, they would find her and rescue her from. . . wherever she was.

Suppose they couldn't find her? Suppose they didn't care?

No, she argued, of course they cared. They were her friends. Seibrum-san and Fue-chan and Bella and Kate and Sami-san and. . . they were her friends, they wouldn't leave her here.

Vale wouldn't leave her here. He loved her, they were going to get married, he would never leave her alone in some field until she starved to death or went insane or. . . .

Any minute now, she thought, turning her face back up to the sky. Any minute now he's going to come for you and then won't you feel stupid for doubting him?

Yeah. Any minute now. . . .

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was starting to get dark. Inomi shivered, even though it was pleasantly warm.

Dark. She hated the dark. A lot. She really hated being outside when it was dark. She watched the sun go down in a strange sort of half-desperation, trying to will it to stay light. This did absolutely nothing, of course; the sun could care less whether she wanted it to shine on her or not. She thought that was rather unfair of it. Then she wondered why she was thinking about the sun as if it were a person, and then she realized how very dark it was getting and concentrated on being very still and not thinking.

Maybe she could build a fire or something. She looked around. There were no trees that she could see at all, just never-ending plains of stubby grass. Grass was burnable, wasn't it? Yeah, yeah, it was really burnable. No problem, she could gather up some grass and. . . .

She had absolutely no way to light a fire, she realized. She got up and paced around, then sat again because it was really getting dark out now and standing made her feel very nervous. She dug half-heartedly into her pockets, and came up with her wallet, some random slips of paper, and quite a bit of lint. Nothing that even vaguely resembled matches. She hadn't expected to find any anyway.

She stared up into the sky as it darkened, first to lavender, then blue, then black and glittering with stars. A familiar nervous restlessness crept into her, making her shift and shiver in the warm air.

I don't have my medication, she thought suddenly, dread settling on her like a layer of dust. What happens if I stop taking it? She tried to remember what that little peice of paper had said, the one that came with the perscription. She remembered the label, the one that had bothered her so much at first: "This medication is used to treat depression or other mental/mood disorders." Try as she might, however, she couldn't remember what it said to do if you missed doses. Maybe she'd become immune to it, although that didn't really make any sense. She shut her eyes and layed down, blocking out the image of the small yellow pills that sat on her bedside at home. She would sleep. Sleep would make her forget about all of this, and surely when she woke up she'd find it had only been a bad dream.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Inomi opened her eyes with a start, shivering violently on the hard, prickly ground. What had woken her?

Carefully, trying not to move, she cast her gaze around her. She saw nothing but the dark endless field, still and silent. But there. Was that a rustling? The sound of footsteps? She jerked up and looked behind her, but there was nothing. Had she been imagining it? Of course. Of course she was imagining it, she was just hearing things the way she usually did. No problem, nothing to worry about-

There it was again. She jumped to her feet this time, heart pounding a wild tattoo in her chest. "Who's there?" she cried. Her voice seemed very small and tinny in the vast plain, and no response came. She strained her ears for any sound, and the replying silence only served to make her even more tense. "Who's there??" Please, she thought despretely, please someone answer me. . . .

The wind was picking up, and she shifted, brushing hair out of her eyes, and as she did she heard a crackling sound and shrieked, dropping to her knees. After a moment of wild terror, it dawned on her that the sound had been her putting her wieght on the dry grass, and she tried to catch her breath before it ran away with her.

Don't be stupid, you're just paranoid. Stupid girl, freaking out over nothing, stupid clumsy--

She couldn't breath, she realized, and it scared her even more. No, no, not here, not here where you're all alone, don't, stop it, stop it, stop it stop it stop it stop it--

"STOP IT!"

She pressed both hand over her mouth, gasping, jumping at the sound of her own voice, and fear grabbed her and shook her until her whole body was quaking like a leave in the wind. There, now you've done it, they'll know where you are now, there's no where you can hide or run because they'll find you, no matter where you go they'll find you and then and then and then and then. . . . She could feel it building, the roaring in her ears and the pressure that welled up deep inside her chest and she had to run, she had to get. away. now. because if she didn't they would catch her and find her and it would be too late and then no one would save her and who would save her anyway because she didn't really deserve to be saved and then and then and then and then and then oh god she couldn't stop it now stop it stop it please god somebody anybody. . . .

She struggled frantically to her feet and ran and ran until her heart felt as though it would burst out of her chest, stumbling, falling, rolling, and then she screamed. Over and over and over again, her voice howling petulantly above the roaring in her ears until at last she was able to stop and breath, deep gasping breaths. "Please. . ." she whimpered. "Please make it stop. . . ." She didn't know or care who she pleaded with anymore, tears rolling slowly down her cheeks and onto the ground. "Please. . . please someone come. . . someone. . . someone please answer me!!" This last was shouted into the still night air and she pulled herself upright, trembling.

The darkness offered no reply.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When the morning's first light came, it found Inomi lying on her back in the prickly grass, staring into the sky with a passive, blank expression. She was very tired, as she always was after one of those episodes, and she was singing quietly and rather absently.

"Wir kommen alle. . . alle. . . alle in den Himmel. . . ."

The sun rose as uncaringly as it had set, but she was vaguely glad to see it, anyway. ". . . weil wir so brav sind. . ." He would come get her today for sure. He wouldn't let her stay here through another hellish night. No way. ". . . weil wir so brav sind. . . ."

Her elbows and knees hurt where she had fallen on them. She might have ripped her clothes. She should check. "Da schleisst uns der Petrus ein er sagt. . ."

She didn't move. She didn't have the will to move. I'm going to lay here till I die, she thought. ". . . ich lass gern euch rein. . . ." Strangely, she couldn't make herself care about that. Her head hurt, though. Maybe that was why. "Ihr wart auf Erden. . . ." She should get up. She needed to eat.

She didn't move.

". . . schon die reinstein Engelein. . . wir kommen alle, alle, alle. . . ."

Any minute now. . . .

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