AWAKING


              His bare feet were comfortably resting on a closet pole that I carefully place from the edge of the window sill to a high side table at the end of his bed.
              We were alone in his room.  The smell to alfalfa fields was filling his room, fresh green steins painted his khaki pants.
               Sergio, my cousin, was lying down, relaxing on his bed. He used to work for our uncle Alfredo since he was fifteen, three years ago after his father death. April is alfalfa season, time where the dry desert soil cover itself with flowers and grass, if the rain  is right.  I am still remembering  flowers and alfalfa aroma mixing with the smell of men, and watching those strong torsos soaked with sweat and stained by grass and alfalfa from my uncle's fields.
               I was playing with Sergio's toes, I was about eight years old at that time and my hands were far too small compared to the huge size of his feet.
               -Wait, I'm going to get more comfortable- He said, and then he unbuckled his belt, opened his pants and took them off.  Under his briefs I was able to see his black pubic hair contrasting dramatically with the whiteness of his underwear. I waited patiently until his pants went all the way down and out of his legs.  Only then my fingers went back to his toes.  His body odor pushed me closer to his skin and then, I started to sniff him eagerly.  I ran my fingers over his legs, playing with his short and curly hair, my hands and then my tongue playing and tasting him. I couldn't see my cousin's face, his legs were tensed letting me feel his strong muscles. Although I was quite young my blood was racing faster inside my veins like a hot wave underneath my skin. My whole body was boiling inside.  It was my face on his feet, my fingers against his legs, my tongue licking his toes, his salty skin impregnating every little space inside my mouth.
               My hands reached up looking for the elastic band of his underwear, followed by my face and tongue.  I started to taste the edge of his brief and I felt the thickness of his pubic hair tickling my tongue.  I wanted to go further, my hands were under the white cloth and touched slowly his aroused manhood, caressing it, worshiping it. I felt drunk with pleasure, it was me and his dick.
               Suddenly I felt a punch on my face, a lighting bolt making  me fell on my back, my face was burning. I stare at him, he did not move. No one else was around.  Silent tears rolling down burning, hurting. Shame or anger? I did not know.   He stood  up, fixed his underwear, walked closer to me. I was terrified, what did I do?  He hit me.   He stretched his arms to reach me I raised mine to protect myself.  He sat by my side, put his arm around my shoulder and tenderly hugged me. I sob softly.
               - I'm sorry, this is wrong  we shouldn't have done it.
               - Why?
               - Because- it was his answer.
               I love him, I wanted to touch him, to feel close to him, Why was it wrong?  He might have read my mind
               - I don't know, but it's wrong.
               Silence, the room felt empty, we stare at each other. Words did not come out of our mouths, but I felt an energy passing from his body into my body.   His hands grabbing me pressing me against his chest and his lips kissing me on my cheek.   I let my hand rest on his tight, he tensed, the smell to alfalfa was filling up the room again.  His fingers running trough my hair, while with his other hand he was sweeping away my tears.  I lifted my eyes, his lips were red intense, full of life, his skin slightly tanned and his hair bleached by the sun.
               -Don't tell grandma- he said no more, we were shaking, we were out of breath, he hugged me stronger, kissed me on the mouth while I placed my little hand over his aroused crotch.