70 above
Texans turn on the heat and unpack the thermal underwear.
Harleys start, but idle roughly.
People in *North Dakota go swimming in the Lakes.

60 above
North Carolinians cancel outside sporting events.
People in North Dakota plant gardens.

50 above
Californians shiver uncontrollably. Harleys have a hard time starting.
People in North Dakota sunbathe.

40 above
Italian & English cars won't start.
Harleys won't start unless jumped.
People in North Dakota drive with the windows down.

32 above
Distilled water freezes.
Harleys start leaking more than just oil.
Seniors citizens in North Dakota wear long sleeve shirts.

20 above
Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, and woolly hats.
God has to be involved to get a Harley to start.
People in North Dakota throw on a flannel shirt.

15 above
Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in North Dakota have the last cookout before it gets cold.

0
People in Miami Flee to Cuba...
North Dakota people wear hats when outside.

-20 below
Californians fly away to Mexico.
People in North Dakota get out their winter coats.

-40 below
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in North Dakota are selling cookies door to door.

-60 below
Polar bears begin to evacuate the Artic.
North Dakota Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it
gets cold enough.

-80 below
Mt. St. Helens freezes.
People in North Dakota rent some videos.

-100 below
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
College students in North Dakota get frustrated because they can't
thaw the keg.

-297 below
Microbial life no longer survives on dairy products.
Cows in North Dakota complain about farmers with cold hands.

-460 below
ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero in the Kelvin scale).
People in North Dakota start saying, "Cold 'nuff for ya?"

-500 below
Hell freezes over.
Schools buses in North Dakota run one hour late.
So True...
*Notice that you can replace North Dakota with Minnesota also...
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