The News for those few who play real croquet! August 7, 2005
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| The Two Steves of Steve-Aid 2005, Steve Roberts (fifth place) and Steve Unfred (Champion) |
Steve Unfred shows better pop shots skills than Nathan and Mike winning his own Steve-Aid
By Brandon Lasher"Steve Unfred winning Steve-Aid? It is rigged," said Alena Woicicki. Steve-Aid returned for its second time on a very hot August day at the Unfred Course. The event took nearly four hours as played slowed down in the backyard. It was a combination of dogs, heat and three very difficult final wickets. The league was looking for ways to speed up play for future events.
Steve-Aid quickly broke the record-tying field of nine in half quickly. The second wicket on Steve Unfred's wooden porch split the leaders from the pack. Nathan was in his normal lead followed by a surprising Steve Roberts. Steve Unfred, Brandon, and Jennifer were close behind. Ben, Alena, and Keri continued to roll down the deck. Mike Cough got stuck in a corner near the deck for almost all of his twelve turns. The hole was quickly dubbed "The Mike Hole".
Nathan and Steve Roberts were racing thru the fourth wicket when something surprising happened. Nathan, resident nice guy, sabotaged the rookie player. We warned him of karma affecting him, which it seemed to do. Nathan got thru an easy fifth wicket and proceeded to hit a bizarre shot which hit a bicycle and went out of bounds. This allowed the Steves and Brandon to catch Nathan. This begun a race to a dirt mound shot.
This was were the play started to slow down. With the exception of Steve Unfred, the dirt mound slowed down all the leaders. It even let Mike and Jennifer back into contention. Steve Unfred cruised thru Hell Hill wicket as the rest of the players struggled on that hole as well. Steve looked certain to win Steve-Aid!
However, the ninth wicket proved hard. It required a pop shot onto a green box and then the hope that it rolled thru the wicket. Only three players (Mike, Nathan, and Ben) finished it without using the twelve shot rule. It proved beneficial for Mike and Nathan as both had shots at the end stick for the win. However, Steve Unfred used the twelve shot rule and hit a beautiful pop shot to hit the end stick first. Mike hit it next for second and Nathan a rare third. Steve Unfred had won his own Steve-Aid.
The rest of the players complained about the heat. Ben used his speed thru the final wickets to inch past Steve Roberts for fourth. Brandon took a disappointing sixth. Jennifer, playing in a dress, cut herself and finished an angry seventh. Keri beat out Alena to claim eighth. Thus ended the eighth event of the year and the league headed off to hydrate themselves.
| Rank | Attended | Total Money | Average Takings | |
| 1 | Nathan | 6 | $ 27,500 | $ 4,583 |
| 2 | Mike | 8 | $ 21,900 | $ 2,738 |
| 3 | Brandon | 8 | $ 19,300 | $ 2,413 |
| 4 | Steve | 7 | $ 16,500 | $ 2,357 |
| 5 | Ben | 8 | $ 14,100 | $ 1,763 |
| 6 | Alena | 8 | $ 7,300 | $ 913 |
| 7 | William | 2 | $ 3,800 | $ 1,900 |
| 8 | Steve R. | 4 | $ 2,800 | $ 700 |
| 9 | Keri | 4 | $ 2,100 | $ 525 |
| 10 | Jennifer | 3 | $ 1,900 | $ 633 |
| 11 | Brenda | 2 | $ 1,300 | $ 650 |
| 12 | Kyle S. | 1 | $ 700 | $ 700 |
Scott Balthrop Memorial Tournament, the second major, will makes its return. We will remember the legendary Scott Balthrop at the IMC's only match play event at the Lasher Course starting at 9:30 a.m. on August 28th. Who will sign the legendary baby chair in 2005?
The Upcoming!
Mike's Marvel Open Invitational
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| Steve Unfred, the man Mike is picking on, in front of the difficult ninth wicket at Steve-Aid 2005 |
By Mike Cough
10. Any day now.
9. Put down the anime.
8. It's like watching a human snail.
7. Look out! (Alan only)
6. Time can go backwards.
5. It's a level seven nerd!
4. That's a big mallet, compensating?
3. There is a time limit rule and it's called "Go Unfred"
2. This is what your doing (talking), this is what I want to do (shooting).
And the Number One thing overhead while Steve Unfred shoots....
1. Nice Ass!