The News for those few who play real croquet!                                May 19, 2001

The Frog! And Nathan as well.

Nathan wins event as Alan gets distracted...again

The 2nd Frog Tournament marked Nathan's return to the victory circle. He led the Frog Tournament the entire time followed closely by Alan and Ben throughout the event.

The tournament was quite close until the Trench Run shot separated the field. This shot slowed down Steve, Mike, and Brandon. They finished fourth, fifth, and sixth place respectively. Mike was found to say, "I took the day off for this?" This is as if winning more Frog Dollars would make up for the money Mike lost by not working.

This tournament marked the first time three females were at the same event. However, the tournament had only two who actually played. Amy returned to finish in seventh place despite the fact she was distracted reading Ben's role playing game strategy guides most of the event. Holly Gregg, brother of IMC player Ricky Gregg, finished in eighth place after she withdrew early. She received a last place "prize" of a Backstreet Boys video.

Nathan was helped by Alan Manka. Manka was too busy dancing and wrestling with Holly along with another unnamed female spectator. While they cheered on Alan, it gave a constant distraction with might have cost him the game. Nathan was able to get over the tough Wood Pile Shot and go thru the Tire Surround end stick. This won him the honor of an Internet picture with the Frog. Alan and his rally squad took a respectable runner-up finish by the defending champion.

Ben took third place in this close three player race. He summed up the event well. "We actually had women for once?" We did indeed and it might have given Nathan the Frog win.

Holly Gregg, part of the Manka Squad.

By Brandon Lasher

The Frog Memorial Tournament marked the debut of the Manka Squad. They are croquet groupies to support Alan Manka in his quest to repeat as Player of the Year. Holly and an unnamed female groupie supported Alan at the most recent tournament.

"I can't believe it!" exclaimed Mike Cough, "I have been trying for years to get women and Alan gets multiple supporters along with a cheerleader girlfriend." Mike proceeded to run off to church to ask God some serious questions.

Manka has a long history of losing events because of being distracted by women. At the 2000 Midnight Rose Open, Alan was leading until a young women in a hot tub caused him to fall to fifth place. In the original Mike's Marvel, neighborhood girls distracted Alan enough that he finished in last place. Despite Alan's history of hitting on younger women, he was able to get supporters for his Manka squad.

Nathan Cole looked at the positive of this shocking new faction. "As long as Alan is distracted by his rally squad, it will make it easier for everyone else to win." Nathan, the elder statesmen, is quite right.

We asked Alan why he thought a rally squad is important to his game. "Who cares? They are women. Woo!" yelled Alan before taking off to dance with a member of his rally squad.

Will the rally squad screw up Alan game at his own event, the Midnight Rose Open? Will new members show up to increase Alan's distractions? With Alan, you should always expect the unexpected.