Finding Himself, Part One
By Eric Smith


June, 1981

Reginald stepped into the living room. His father was alone in there, reading a map. His mother must have gone upstairs.

"Dad, the taxi's outside. I'm leaving now." said Reggie hesitantly.

His father looked up. "So you're really going through with it. You're going to throw your life away playing with flowers."

"I'm not throwing my life away." This was the last thing Reginald wanted. An argument when he was moments away from leaving for college. "I'm studying for my degree in botany. I'm going to be a scientist."

"You're going to be an egghead." replied his father. "Scientists sit in labs all day and play around. See if that puts food on the table."

"I might make a great discovery." said Reggie, trying to make his father show some interest. "Who knows where I might end up?"

"In the poorhouse." said his dad. "Look, Reginald, I can't stop you from doing this. I just wish you would at least try to be a man and do real work."

"A real man like your friends?" snapped Reggie, thinking of the loud, obnoxious and ignorant bunch his father went out to bars with. "No thanks."

His father's face flushed. "If you're leaving, then go. I'm getting ready for a long haul tomorrow. Not that you'd understand that."

"Have you ever tried to understand me?"

"I can't. I'll never understand a son of mine putting plants ahead of his own flesh and blood. Good-bye."

Reginald left the room. Arguments were useless. He went to the front door-and there stood his mother.

"Reginald, please reconsider. I don't want you doing something you'll regret the rest of your life." she pleaded.

"Mom...I can't. I have to do this. All my life, plants have been the most fascinating thing in the world for me. I want to learn everything about them. I want to get to know them better than anyone else."

She hung her head. "If you insist, son. I hope you'll be happy, and please be careful."

Reggie hugged his mother. "I will, Mom. I love you-and Dad. And I'll get in touch with you as soon as I get settled."

Tears were shining in his mother's eyes. "Goodbye, Reginald-and good luck."

Reggie's own eyes were stinging, but he managed a smile. "Don't worry, Mom. One day, you won't recognize me."

With that, he picked up his suitcase and went out the door, and into the taxi.

"Where to?" asked the porcine driver.

"To the airport." said Reggie. He took one last look back at his old house, realizing he'd probably never see it again. The taxi drove down the street, and Reggie didn't look back again.

May, 2000

Reginald stepped into the greenhouse. Spike was there, playing with a rubber ball. Eric must have gone home. It was nearly 12 midnight.

He looked around at the magazines scattered across the floor. "You guys look like you were having fun." he said sarcastically as he started picking them up. "All I was doing was running from one store to another looking for your special fertilizer." He set down a paper bag marked Scot's Nursery and pulled out a large plastic bag. "You know I hate going around a lot in public. What if someone..." He shook his head. There were too many bad memories associated with that.

Spike was running around, whining and rolling out his tongue. "Okay, okay..." Reggie poured some of the fertilizer into a bowl and gave it to Spike, who attacked it as if he were starving. Reggie gave him a sour look, then scooped up a handful himself and tried it. It was actually good, but looking at the receipt, he remembered it was also expensive.

"Enjoy it." he told Spike. "We can't eat it all the time. It costs too much."

He looked around for some place to set the bag. His eyes fell on an old table along the wall that he hardly ever used. Bushroot placed the bag on it-and his eyes fell on something else. Something brown and leathery, almost hidden under a fern frond. He reached in and pulled it out, and his heart skipped a beat.

It was his old wallet.

Bushroot looked at it in disbelief. He had forgotten he even had a wallet, and no wonder. He had last seen it the night he transformed himself into a half plant, half duck. Thinking back, he realized that he had probably placed it on the table after getting home from the university, and then came the accident, and for obvious reasons, it had been forgotten. But here it was.

He opened it slowly. Everything that represented his past life was in here. The first thing he pulled out was his old driver's license.

Bushroot looked at his 16-year old face on the license. It looked like a total stranger. Reggie suddenly realized that he had almost forgotten what he looked like as a normal duck. He stared at the license. Although it was still valid, it was also useless. His root-like feet would make driving a car difficult at best. And who would sell him a car, even if he could afford it? Plus, he couldn't use it as ID, for obvious reasons. Not that he'd ever reveal his appearance to anyone who'd want ID. He sighed...talk about a Catch-22. True, he had not long ago driven a truck during an attempt to sabotage Christmas, but a truck was bigger. There had been more room for him to operate the pedals. Reggie put those thoughts out of his mind. He hadn't been thinking straight then. That unfortunate part of his life was over.

He put the license back and looked through some of the other things. His SCU student's ID card. His staff ID card. A library card. Bushroot hadn't been near a library since his transformation. Other junk such as video store membership cards. All of it worthless now.

Reginald put the wallet back on the table. He sat down on his small couch. Everything in the wallet belonged to somebody who didn't really exist anymore. There wasn't even money in it, the one thing he still could use.

As he sat there, a terrible feeling of sadness came over him. He didn't want to forget who he used to be completely, difficult as his early life had been. But he was afraid he would, and be unable to stop it. And he was the only one in the world who really understood his situation. He knew that Eric would probably understand as a friend, but that was different. All the ID and licenses in Eric's wallet were still useable by him. People looking at it knew it was the same person. Not so with Bushroot. And again, he couldn't reveal his face to strangers anyway.

Bushroot lay down on the couch. He felt the tears coming and didn't care. He knew there was no way of getting back who he was, nor did he really want to. He was happy with his new life...he just didn't want to lose his old one.

END OF PART 1

Reginald Bushroot, Spike and St. Canard are the property of Disney. This document was created for non-profit entertainment purposes only. This story is (C)2000 Eric Smith.
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