VOICE OF ANGEL

 

As I was alone in a dark room, waiting to destiny do it’s work. To leave me alone without you. I never thought I would like to stop the time and do it all again. But I can’t. Now it’s all over. Never had you in my arms, to hold you. Embrace you with all your heat. I can’t hear anymore beat of my heart. Can you? My darling, I lived only for you, and now I’m dying only for you. Don’t feel bad because of me, the way you loved me it make this exit more better. I don’t feel fear of dying. I hope you could forgive me someday. There is blood all over this room. It will never go off. Why did I do this? I can’t find right reason…there is so many. But not of those aren’t your fault, believe me. I lay down with single tear. It is for you…only you I regret. Only your love kept me this long on life. I’m thankful for it…I thanked God everyday for you, it is truth.

You brought me from dead. Breath life in me. But you can’t stop this. I’m only alive for a moment. Moment of regret. Moment of fear. Don’t cry for me, my love. Save tears for somebody that is worth of you. I wasn’t…never. I see…I see you now, beside me. Holding me in your embrace. It is a feeling that could bring me back…but it can’t bring me back. I’m aware of thing that I’ve done now. I’m aware of consequences of my action. I don’t want to go away. But I should think of that before.

Sirens…I hear sirens. Did you called somebody to rescue me? You know that is impossible. I will try to live as long I can…for you, my love. I love you, I loved you in the past, I will love you forever. To the end of the world, and beyond.

I don’t feel my body anymore. I see them working on me…the doctors. But as I know they can’t do much. They are aware of that too. I made of body an artwork…shivered with blood of my veins. I’m beside of one of doctors. He’s swaying something…trying to get me back to life. I leave him with that thought. Open the door, I pass trough the hall. I see you, crying. I sit next to you, seeing you, comforting you with my words that you can’t hear. How I wish that you can feel me now, that I can feel you now.

Something is searching for me to return. And I go to complete darkness.

I wake up, I see you beside me. Did they rescued me? I know that they didn’t, they just make my life a little longer. It’s is enough that they could do to me. You are sleeping, tired…like you are here for days. I make a slight move, trying not to wake you. But I did just opposite. You are awake now. Surprised to see me alive you ran to the first doctor telling him that I’m awake. They get inside this room like in hurry. I’m not hurrying anywhere. Doctor asks me how do I feel, and I answer him alive. It’s not an answer that he expected but he knows what I mean. I’m kind of glad that I get some more time. He checks me, check my wounds that I did to myself. He knows. He knows that I wont live till sunrise or maybe less. Wounds are rather than painful. But they stitched me back, like I’m some broken puppet. Doctor seeing that there is nothing that he can do anymore leaves me alone with you.

You doesn’t know what to say, so you remain silent. Not asking me anything. You come closer to me, sit back on chair, holding my hand…looking at me. No, don’t look at me, please. I look away. You don’t understand why, and I can’t tell you why. I came too close to darkness I think. Without you, I went to darkness myself, not knowing is it right or wrong. I still don’t know is it good decision. But if is this my last chance to say goodbye, then I won’t miss it. I feel you watching me, feeling sorrow of your heart. I start crying, and I look at you. Still silent, not understanding you embrace me. I accept it all. Whisper in your ear words “My love, don’t wait for me. I must go in strange land, where destiny waits for me. I will wait for you there forever…but on this land I have nothing more to do. I loved you in a way that I never loved before, and now I’m setting you free. My love, be free, for me…”The wounds were too heavy, and with that words I went off this world. I had my chance, I took it…and now I can peacefully go…

 

THE END

by Fallen One

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