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| Fan Fiction Archive |
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| Diseased Transcribed by StarvedChoccobo |
[Scene opens with a shot of the school bus, and shots of the street where Darien and Hobbes are.] DARIEN: A rebel with a cause named Susan Sontag said that, "Society needs an illness which can be identified with evil." Now, our society has more than one. To that end, I quote Sly Stallone from his seminal film, Cobra. "Crime is a disease. I'm the cure." [Hobbes loads a clip into his gun and cocks it]. HOBBES: He's late. DARIEN: You're sure this is the right place, right? HOBBES: I'm sure. Why do you do that? DARIEN: Do what? HOBBES: You doubt me. DARIEN: What are you talking about? HOBBES: You're doubting me. DARIEN: How am I doubting you? HOBBES: You're second-guessing me. I know how to do my job. Don't do it. DARIEN: Please. HOBBES: Don't forget, you're the amateur around here. DARIEN: You're absolutely right. It's your job to second-guess me. HOBBES: Exactly. [Yuri walks around a corner down the street and heads towards Hobbes and Darien.] HOBBES: All right, here he comes. DARIEN: You're sure that's him, right? HOBBES: Didn't I say? What'd I just say? DARIEN: I just want to be sure� HOBBES: Yuri! Gregorov, my friend! [Yuri walks over to Hobbes and hugs him, then kisses him lightly on both cheeks.] YURI: Comrade Hobbes, previet. HOBBES: Nice to see you. Life is good, no? YURI: Good. Da. HOBBES: Good, good, good. My friend, Darien Fawkes. DARIEN: Nice to meet you. YURI: An honor. HOBBES: So, we on? Everything good? YURI: Meeting is set, should be here soon. DARIEN: Let me ask you a question, uh, why are you helping us? HOBBES: Fawkes� DARIEN: No, I'm just curious, I just, why are you helping us? YURI: Because to Hobbes, I owe favor. And because this mudak, this man they call Telefon, he sells death weapons. This is not good for us. DARIEN: Oh, right, yeah. You guys are fine with just regular old guns, huh? HOBBES: Fawkes, please. This is my friend here. (laughs) Fawkes knows you're just a concerned citizen, Yuri, don't worry about it. He's a union guy, da? YURI: Da. Union. HOBBES: (laughs) Okay. [An ice cream truck drives down the street, playing "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star. Yuri, Darien, and Hobbes dart behind the school bus]. YURI: It's him. Telefon. DARIEN: In an ice cream truck? YURI: They drive through all gang turfs. The police never bother to check. That's why Telefon uses this. DARIEN: Hold on, let me, let me clear something up here. We're talking about Arnaud, right? YURI: Who? DARIEN: Arnaud. HOBBES: Arnaud. The guy you call "Telefon", we call "The Phone". DARIEN: Yeah, well, actually, his last name is "de Fehrne." HOBBES: De Fehrne, de Fehrne. It's Swiss, you know. DARIEN: Close. Swiss-German. His first name is Arnaud. Yeah, but, believe me, selling biological weapons to organized crime is so him. HOBBES: All right, here's what you do, Yuri, you go out, you make contact. You ask to see the merchandise, right? If it gets hot in there, run. YURI: Da. HOBBES: All right. [Yuri heads out to the ice cream truck.] DARIEN: Good advice. HOBBES: Thank you. DARIEN: Da. Let me ask you something, do you really trust a guy in the Russian mafia? HOBBES: Don't worry about it, he's ex-KGB. DARIEN: Oh, I�I didn't know that. Sorry, forget I said anything. [Darien quicksilvers and heads after Yuri]. HOBBES: Fawkes, what are you doing? Where are you going? Fawkes� [Yuri walks up to the ice cream truck, and addresses the thug inside.] YURI: I'm craving something�sour. [Hobbes watches through binoculars as Arnaud steps out of the front of the ice cream truck.] ARNAUD: Yuri. DARIEN: Arnaud. HOBBES: Uh-oh. ARNAUD:(in Russian) Good day, my friend. (shakes Yuri's hand) Nice to see you, Yuri. [Arnaud looks skyward.] ARNAUD: It's a bright day. [Darien watches in quicksilver vision as Arnaud puts on sunglasses, then looks directly at him.] ARNAUD: Hello, Fawkes. [Arnaud pulls a gun as Yuri runs.] ARNAUD: Fancy seeing you here. [Seen through Arnaud's glasses, Darien bolts as Arnaud fires. Arnaud chases Darien down an alley as Hobbes moves out towards the ice cream truck. The thug inside pulls a gun and pins Hobbes down. Scene shifts to Arnaud's heat-vision glasses. Arnaud chases Darien into a chain link fence, where Darien sheds quicksilver and turns around slowly.] ARNAUD: Whoo. Tag. You're dead. [Arnaud pulls the trigger, but the gun is empty.] DARIEN: See? Now I'm always going to know you said that. [Darien grabs Arnaud and throws him up against a wall.] DARIEN: Hmm? ARNAUD: It's alright, I'll save us both the embarrassment. DARIEN: Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah? [Arnaud raises a canister of gas, and triggers it. He drops it as the scene shifts back to the firefight between Hobbes and the thug. Arnaud walks out of the gas with a gas mask on. The ice cream truck pulls up, and Arnaud walks in. The ice cream truck drives off as Hobbes fires at the back, hitting the speaker in the process. Hobbes runs to Darien as he walks out of the mist, coughing heavily. He falls to the ground.] HOBBES: You all right? You okay? [Darien looks up, and glares at where the ice cream truck sped away.] DARIEN: I hate him. HOBBES: Let's go. [Hobbes helps Darien up, and slings one arm over his shoulder.] Fade to static and intro. DARIEN: (VO) There once was a story about a man who could turn invisible. I thought it was only a story, until it happened to me. Okay, so here's how it works. There's this stuff called quicksilver, that can bend light. Some scientists made it into a synthetic gland, and that's where I came in. See, I was facing life in prison, and they were looking for a human experiment. So, we made a deal. They put the gland in my head, I walk free. The operation was a success, but that's where everything started to go wrong. Fade to commercial. [Scene returns in Darien's apartment. Used tissues are everywhere.] DARIEN: The three wise men known as the Beastie Boys once shouted out, "It's time to get ill!" [The camera then moves to Darien in bed, where he grabs a tissue just in time to cover a sneeze.] DARIEN: Hey, screw them. [Darien hears knocking at the door, and gets up, covered in a blanket, to answer it. Darien coughs as he opens the door a crack and peers out.] DARIEN: Hey. [Darien opens the door, and Claire walks in.] CLAIRE: Good morning, Darien. DARIEN: It is? CLAIRE: How are you feeling? DARIEN: Ugh�crappy. [Claire sits down and opens a carrying case, filled with equipment.] CLAIRE: Well, that's the desired effect of the "Helena" virus. Type A virus, big fave with the terrorists due to its airborne infection rate. [Claire sticks a thermometer into Darien's mouth.] CLAIRE: Leave that in. [Darien takes out the thermometer.] DARIEN: Hey, hey, hey, wait a minute. Are you gonna give me antibiotics? Cause antibiotics make me nauseous. [Claire turns back to Darien and holds up a can of chicken soup]. CLAIRE: I've got something much more effective. [Hobbes walks in with a can of disinfectant and a medical sterilization mask. Hobbes starts spraying the area around him with the disinfectant.] DARIEN: Hey, Hobbesie, what's going on? HOBBES: How you doing, Fawkes? [Darien coughs as the disinfectant hits him. Hobbes keeps spraying and backs up to where Claire is.] CLAIRE: What�hello, Bobby. HOBBES: Hey, how are ya, Keep? How are you doing? CLAIRE: What are you doing here? HOBBES: Just came to see my partner, that's all. DARIEN: Actually, I asked him to come by. Hey, Hobbes, what's, what's the update? HOBBES: Score's Arnaud, 1, the Agency, zero. Our position's compromised. He knows we're on his trail. DARIEN: Yeah, I was there. What's our next move? CLAIRE: Our move? Darien� [Hobbes keeps talking.] DARIEN: Yuri got spooked, so he split, alright? So I figure, we hit up some of the other potential buyers, see if we can get a line on his whereabouts. DARIEN: Good, good, good. We'll start tomorrow, I'll go with you. [Hobbes and Claire start protesting, but Darien cuts them off.] DARIEN: No, no, please. Come on. I-I don't want to hear, "Darien, you're, you're too sick, you're in no condition." Believe me, I'm feeling better just thinking about Arnaud's� [Darien stutters, then lets loose an explosive sneeze and crashes into something behind him. Hobbes grabs Claire and draws them both back from Darien, as the Official and Eberts walk in the door.] OFFICIAL: Gesundheit! HOBBES: You okay? DARIEN: Oh, god, what are you guys doing here? OFFICIAL: I came by to check up on my most valuable agent. Offer him emotional support. DARIEN: Sick pay would have been better. OFFICIAL: Hmm. What's the update on Arnaud? [Claire walks over to Darien.] CLAIRE: You know, if you're going to go outside, I'm going to get your temperature. [Claire sticks the thermometer back into Darien's mouth.] CLAIRE: Now, leave this in this time� [Hobbes walks over to Eberts and the Official.] HOBBES: When you say "our most valuable agent"� [Everybody starts talking at the same time] OFFICIAL: I mean Fawkes. HOBBES: What're you smiling at, Eberts? CLAIRE: Okay, it's 5,000� OFFICIAL: Don't antagonize him. CLAIRE: One thousand, two thousand, three thousand� HOBBES: What're you smirking at, Eberts? HOBBES: Nothing, Robert. [Darien drops the thermometer.] DARIEN: Hey! [Everyone looks at Darien.] DARIEN: Guys, please, would everyone just shut the hell up, or leave? I mean, this place is� [Darien gears up for another sneeze.] HOBBES: Another sneezure, take cover! [Everyone but Eberts moves away and takes cover. Eberts is used as a shield for the Official. Claire moves over to Darien and helps him.] DARIEN: Oh, thank you. [Darien looks at the tissue he was holding. The tissue is covered with quicksilver, which quickly fades most of the tissue from view.] CLAIRE: Did you just�sneeze quicksilver? DARIEN: Is that bad? [The scene shifts to the Keep, where Darien, sitting in the chair, lets loose another sneeze as Hobbes quickly moves out of the way. Darien groans as Eberts takes the tissue with a long pair of tongs and hands it to Claire, who examines it under a microscope.] DARIEN: Could I please go home to my bed now? CLAIRE: Nope, not until I figure out what's going on. DARIEN: Come on, you already said it, some quicksilver got in my mucous passage. So what? [Hobbes is visibly disgusted by this, and moves off.] HOBBES: Please, do I have to listen to this? DARIEN: God, where did you get this chair anyways? This thing was built by a demented dentist. OFFICIAL: How serious is this? CLAIRE: I, uh, I need to draw some blood� DARIEN: Oh, no, come on, please? CLAIRE: And check for an infection. Be a big boy and quicksilver your arm for me. [Darien holds out his arm and coats it with quicksilver, but instead of becoming invisible, the quicksilver turns black and stiffens. The quicksilver also gives off a bad smell, as Claire turns away quickly.] CLAIRE: Whoa. [Darien looks alarmed as the Official and Hobbes groan.] OFFICIAL: Ugh� HOBBES: Oh, man, Fawkes�oh, man, that is rank! [Darien moves his wrist, cracking off some of the diseased quicksilver. The Official turns to Claire, who is obviously confused.] OFFICIAL: What does this mean? CLAIRE: The gland has the flu? [Darien picks off some of the quicksilver.] DARIEN: What does that mean? CLAIRE: I don't know. HOBBES: I know what it means, and it is not good. That is, like, nasty. Put that arm away. DARIEN: When I find Arnaud, I'm gonna take that smug smile of his and stuff it right down his throat. [The scene shifts to a handwritten sign labeled, "Dr. Halliday". The camera pans up to reveal Arnaud in a chauffeur's uniform.] ARNAUD: Dr. Halliday. [Dr. Halliday walks over to Arnaud, and leaves his suitcase with him, then walks to the car. Arnaud appears irritated at having to carry the suitcase, but takes it anyway.] ARNAUD: I got it. [Arnaud opens the trunk to reveal a dead chauffeur, as Arnaud tosses the suitcase on top of the body. Arnaud closes the trunk and gets in the back seat with Dr. Halliday, taking his cap as he enters.] DR. HALLIDAY: What do you want? ARNAUD:We need two things, Doctor. [Arnaud pulls a gun out of his coat.] ARNAUD:Your fingers�and your eyes. [The scene quicksilver fades to a food court. Darien coughs, and the camera pans to him and Hobbes.] HOBBES: You shouldn't be here. DARIEN: Thanks, Mom. HOBBES: You have orders, wait for the results of your blood test. DARIEN: Let me explain something to you, okay? I'm not gonna let a little touch of the cold get in the way of me catching that Swiss Miss motherf�f�f� [Darien sneezes violently as Hobbes moves out of the way quickly.] DARIEN: Ahh. Come on. [Darien recovers, and moves towards Hobbes, who throws his hands up and backs away.] HOBBES: I appreciate the spirit, just keep your distance, please? Please? DARIEN: What the hell are we doing here anyway, huh? HOBBES: Keep it down, all right? DARIEN: For who, huh? For that guy? HOBBES: Shh, shh! Would you stop it? [Hobbes leans in towards Darien.] HOBBES: You know how organized crime uses restaurants as fronts for their operations? DARIEN: Yeah. HOBBES: This is the food court version, got it? [Darien blows his nose.] DARIEN: Hobbes, what are you talking about? HOBBES: All right, look around. DARIEN: I am. HOBBES: All right, you see all the counters? Those are outposts for different crime syndicates. [The camera moves to a shot of a sign for the "Kiev Kitchen"]. HOBBES: You got your Triads here. [Camera moves to men in black suits eating together.] HOBBES: You got your Russian mafia at the KGBistro. [Scene moves to a closer group of men in suits, eating and arguing.] HOBBES: Even the Cosa Nostra's got a joint. This place is no-man's land, Fawkes. Neutral zone. Geneva convention of the underworld, my friend. [Darien stares around in amazement as Hobbes moves off.] HOBBES: Would you come on? I'll show you. DARIEN: There's a roller coaster here. [Scene moves to a shot of the sign for "Wok, Drop & Roll".] HOBBES: Two wonton specials, couple of egg rolls, with extra soy sauce. [The waiter nods, and looks down.] HOBBES: Second thought - hold the wontons, and sub the soy for sweet and sour. [The waiter looks up at Hobbes.] WAITER: For here, or to go? HOBBES: For here. [Hobbes smirks and turns to Darien, who looks doubtful]. WAITER: Who sent you? HOBBES: FBI. We got word from the Russians that the Triads are snapping up biological weapons from foreign dealers. This is a warning to you, and an opportunity to cooperate before it's too late. WAITER: Biological what? HOBBES: Weapons. Don't test me. WAITER: Go back to the Russians, G-man, I don't know what you're talking about. HOBBES: You don't know what I'm talking about? [Darien interrupts]. DARIEN: Hey, Hobbes, let me� HOBBES: He knows what I'm talking about. DARIEN: We're looking for a guy named Arnaud. HOBBES: "The Phone". DARIEN: "De Fehrne". WAITER: Who? [Darien and Hobbes speak simultaneously.] DARIEN & HOBBES: Arnaud. HOBBES: "The Phone". DARIEN: "De Fehrne". [The scene moves outside, to an Italian man dressed in white.] ITALIAN: I don't know the guy. HOBBES: You never heard of any of these guys? ITALIAN: Oh, hey, what'd I say here? No. HOBBES: You don't know any of them? [Darien sips a drink.] ITALIAN: Hey, what are you, (Italian)? Anyway, what do we want with biology weapons? HOBBES: Maybe it's a status thing, or something. [The Italian man sniffs.] ITALIAN: Come on. HOBBES: You never heard of Arnaud? ITALIAN: I don't know the guy, all right? DARIEN: Hey, Hobbes, let's get out of here, alright? [Darien gets up to leave.] ITALIAN: But you� [The Italian man points to Darien, who stops]. ITALIAN: You look familiar, yeah. You used to run with Johhny Castignacci's crew, right? Am I right? Am I right here, Bobby? [Scene shifts to a Russian man inside a different restaurant. Hobbes, Darien, and the Russian are gathered at a table.] RUSSIAN: I don't know. HOBBES: You know. RUSSIAN: No. HOBBES: Yes, you do. RUSSIAN: No. [Hobbes looks at the Russian across the table.] HOBBES: I don't believe you. [Hobbes turns to Darien.] HOBBES: I don't believe him. DARIEN: You don't believe him? HOBBES: He knows exactly what I'm talking about. [Hobbes turns back to the Russian.] HOBBES: Two words: Yuri Gregarov. [The Russian begins to laugh.] RUSSIAN: What about him? He's a fool. HOBBES: He's a friend of mine. RUSSSIAN: We kicked him out last month. If he doesn't pay back what he gambled away, we will take both his thumbs as souvenirs. (laughs) [Hobbes turns to Darien, who looks sick.] HOBBES: You don't feel good? DARIEN: What's wrong, you no like pierogi, huh? [Darien gets up and leaves.] HOBBES: You don't like pierogi? The egg rolls? Fawkes? [Hobbes goes after him, while the Russian laughs. The scene shifts to the parking lot, where Darien's arm is quicksilvering as he shakes it wildly. Hobbes follows Darien, who is beginning to panic.] DARIEN: Hobbes�. HOBBES: Easy, buddy. [Darien turns around the rear of the van, holding his arm, which is coated in quicksilver, but quickly changing to a brown substance.] DARIEN: Hobbes, Hobbes, it's not stopping! Hobbes! [Hobbes runs around Darien, and opens the van. Darien grasps his arm and feels it.] HOBBES: Get in. [Darien gets into the van as Hobbes pulls out a cell phone and dials. The scene shifts to the Keep, where Claire is studying the sample. Her telephone rings, and she picks it up. The scene returns to Darien, who is beating his arm against the van. ] HOBBES: His arms are frozen stiff. They're covered with this smelly�sicksilver. [Scene jumps back to Claire.] CLAIRE: Get him in here now. [The scene returns to Hobbes.] HOBBES: You got it. [The camera jumps to the door of the Keep opening, with Hobbes rolling in a hand truck. Darien is on the hand truck, coated in sicksilver up to his neck.] HOBBES: Keep! [Claire runs over to Hobbes.] CLAIRE: Okay, okay, lie him on the ground. Lie him on the ground. [Claire and Hobbes lower Darien to the ground.] DARIEN: (yelling) Will you just get it off me?! CLAIRE: I will, I will, I will. Deep breaths. Deep, deep breaths. [Claire runs back to her equipment as Hobbes stands over Darien.] HOBBES: Focus, focus. [Darien looks at Hobbes, then at Claire, who returns with a vibrating saw.] DARIEN: Not with that! CLAIRE: It's the only way, okay? Hold still. DARIEN: (softly) Aw, crap. [Claire starts the saw and begins cutting the sicksilver. Darien watches her nervously as the sicksilver moves up towards his mouth and nose.] Fade to commercial. [The scene returns with a shot of the floor, with Darien's clothes, coated with sicksilver, cut into shreds and strewn all over. Eberts sweeps them up as Hobbes watches. Darien, covered with a sheet, watches as the Official enters the Keep.] OFFICIAL: All right, someone explain. [Claire pauses, then starts talking.] CLAIRE: Darien's condition has not improved. OFFICIAL: What do the blood tests say? CLAIRE: Oh, the pathology made one thing clear: I don't know what we're dealing with. OFFICIAL: What? CLAIRE: Darien has the flu, but it's not the Helena virus. It's some strain that I've never even seen before. I ran it through the CDC database, and they hadn't seen it, either. DARIEN: I know what it is. [The camera shifts to Darien, who is lying down and looking miserable.] DARIEN: It's the old Arnaud Special. HOBBES: Yep. [The camera moves to Hobbes, who is sitting behind Darien.] HOBBES: You should have seen it, boss. Not pretty. CLAIRE: I want permission to check Darien into Fort Leavitt. OFFICIAL: No. No way. DARIEN: Hobbes, excuse me. What is Fort Leavitt? CLAIRE: It's the standard procedure for this scenario. DARIEN: Scenario? You guys got scenarios for this kind of thing? OFFICIAL: Fort Leavitt is a hospital. Official spies, agents with top level clearance go there to get checked out, to be treated. HOBBES: So they don't spill the beans while they're spilling blood, see? DARIEN: Thanks, Hobbes. [Hobbes gets up and walks over to Claire and the Official.] HOBBES: Now, I heard that's where they delivered the alien babies from Area 51. CLAIRE: okay, look, look. I can't treat Darien. I need him to be examined by a specialist. OFFICIAL: I don't want anyone else examining him, no matter what their clearance. DARIEN: Keep, but, you know, what is, what is another doctor going to know about me that you don't? CLAIRE: Well, they might be able to identify the virus. They could suggest an antibody that's going to fight it. OFFICIAL: What if he quicksilvers in front of them involuntarily? CLAIRE: Well, he's got a very good handle on that now, don't you, Darien? DARIEN: Yeah, but come on. I mean, who, who knows when there'll be another attack, you know? Well, which, by the way, reminds me, I think I�I need a little shot here. [Darien sticks out his arm and displays the tattoo, which has seven segments red.] DARIEN: There. See? [Claire moves to Darien.] HOBBES: I'm starting to suspect our friend Yuri. I'm gonna go track him down, have ourselves a little powwow. DARIEN: Go ahead. And, by the way, I never trusted that guy. He was your friend. [Claire readies a tube, and grasps Darien on the shoulder.] DARIEN: Oh, that's nice. Could you do it a little higher, there? What? [Claire looks at the Official, then at Darien]. CLAIRE: I, uh, I don't think I should give you a shot. [Darien looks up at Claire]. DARIEN: Why not? CLAIRE: Well, I..I don't know how the counteragent will affect you in this� in this current condition. It might make things worse. [Darien turns to the Official]. DARIEN: Let's go to the hospital. [The camera mover to a sign that reads, "Fort Leavitt Hospital". The camera pans up to some MP's, one of whom walks out to the Official's car. The Official flashes a badge at the MP.] MP: Go right ahead, sir. [The Official drives the car through the gate. The scene moves to a hospital room inside Fort Leavitt, where a doctor walks in.] LEWICKI: Hello, everyone. Who's being admitted? [Darien, still covered in a blanket, sneezes.] LEWICKI: (to Darien) Hi. I'm Dr. Lewicki. DARIEN: Hey. Uh, I'm, uh, I'm Darien Fawkes. OFFICIAL: Doctor, this case, and this patient are code ultraviolet. Absolute secrecy. LEWICKI: Yes, I've been informed. You'll have our full cooperation. CLAIRE: And you'll have ours. [Claire shakes hands with Dr. Lewicki.] CLAIRE: Hi, I'm Darien's doctor. I can help fill in any blanks. LEWICKI: Why don't we start with what's wrong? DARIEN: Uh, I got the flu. LEWICKI: The flu. What are your symptoms? [The Official clears his throat. Darien looks at him.] DARIEN: Uh, you know, uh, runny nose, cough. OFFICIAL: And that's it. LEWICKI: Okay. Uh, Darien, I need, uh, to get an idea of your history. OFFICIAL: No, you don't. [Claire glares at the Official.] CLAIRE: Yes, he does. OFFICIAL: That's classified information. LEWICKI: Sir, this is just a routine questionnaire. Are you prone to this type of illness? [Darien looks at the Official, then responds. ] DARIEN: No, not really. LEWICKI: But you've experienced it before. DARIEN: No. LEWICKI: You've never had the flu? DARIEN: Well, not with, uh, these types of symptoms. LEWICKI: You've never had a runny nose? CLAIRE: What, what he means is� [The Official interrupts.] OFFICIAL: Next question. LEWICKI: But I haven't finished� OFFICIAL: Next�question. I'll stop you when he can answer one. [Lewicki looks at the Official, clears his throat, and goes on.] LEWICKI: Have you ever had any surgery? OFFICIAL: Next question. LEWICKI: Are you taking any regular medication? OFFICIAL: Next question. LEWICKI: Are you allergic to any medication? [Darien, Claire, and the Official speak up at the same time.] ALL: No. LEWICKI: I'll need to take a blood test. OFFICIAL: Out of the question. CLAIRE: Um, uh, will you excuse us? [Claire and the Official move to the back of the room. Darien looks at Lewicki.] DARIEN: I mean, I, uh� CLAIRE: I need these people to help me to identify the virus. Now, I can't do that unless they run his blood. OFFICIAL: His blood is saturated with quicksilver, and that is classified. [Claire sighs, then moves back to Lewicki.] CLAIRE: Uh, Dr. Lewicki, I, uh, I actually have a sample of Darien's blood. Perhaps we could, we could, uh, look at it together? You could help me identify the virus, maybe suggest an antibody? [Darien suddenly looks queasy]. CLAIRE: I, I will have to take it when we're through, however. LEWICKI: Well, I really should take a new sample, but if that's what you want� [Darien darts across the room and vomits into the wastebasket. Claire and the Official quickly move over to him.] CLAIRE: Oh, dear�you know what? I really need to get him stabilized. DARIEN: I'm okay. [The Official opens the door, and Claire helps Darien out, followed by Lewicki.] CLAIRE: I need a 60cc saline drip, a blood glucose reassessment� LEWICKI: There's a team on standby. [Claire and Lewicki leave, with Claire still talking. The Official starts to leave with them, but waits for a moment, then doubles back, and grabs the wastebasket that Darien vomited in, and takes it with him, holding it at arm's length. The scene quicksilver fades to the Russian restaurant, where Yuri walks up to the cashier. He places a paper sack on the counter.] CASHIER: (in Russian) What are you doing here? YURI: (in Russian) I came to pay my tab. [The cashier looks at Yuri, then into the bag.] CASHIER: (in Russian) You're a weasel, Yuri. [The cashier looks into the bag again, and smiles.] CASHIER: (in Russian) A lucky weasel. [Yuri laughs as Hobbes walks in behind him.] HOBBES: Yuri, Yuri, Yuri. [Yuri looks panicked, then turns to Hobbes.] HOBBES: You don't call, you don't write. YURI: Hobbes, you're alive! [Yuri attempts to hug Hobbes, but is stopped.] HOBBES: That's close enough, comrade. YURI: What's wrong? HOBBES: What's wrong? I don't know. Been doing some thinking. About you, about Arnaud, about that alley. YURI: You mean�the alley�where we almost got shot? HOBBES: No, the alley where I almost got shot. Where Fawkes almost got shot. The alley where you skipped out of the kill zone without even a scratch, only to show up here settling your gambling debts with the payoff money Arnaud gave you to set us up. (points at Yuri) That alley. YURI: I was just following your advice. HOBBES: What advice is that, my friend? YURI: When it gets hot, run. HOBBES: Let me tell� [Yuri bolts out the door. Hobbes runs after him. The two run through the food court, and past a roller coaster. Yuri runs past a boy on a scooter, but Hobbes runs into him, and the two are sent flying.] BOY: Hey, watch where you're going, idiot! Stupid, bald loser! [Hobbes looks up at the kid. The camera moves to a shot of the scooter chasing Yuri, with Hobbes riding it. Hobbes chases Yuri into the parking lot, and pins him up against a car.] HOBBES: Hey! Second rulHobbes: you never run from Bobby Hobbes. You hear me? Ever! Now fess up. Biological weapons and the whole deal was a setup, right? YURI: Da. HOBBES: Da! YURI: Arnaud paid me to leak you the tip. HOBBES: Oh, yeah? He wanted us in the alley. Why, Yuri? YURI: Not you. Your friend, Fawkes. HOBBES: I don't believe it. Too much effort to kill someone. [Hobbes spins Yuri around, who spots a black BMW driving towards them.] YURI: Look out! [Yuri pushes Hobbes out of the way as the men in the BMW start to fire. Yuri is hit repeatedly. Hobbes pulls out his gun and shoots once, but the car is already moving too far away. He motions towards the car in frustration, then leans over Yuri.] HOBBES: Oh, Yuri, Yuri. YURI: And to think, I just got paid. (groans) HOBBES: Looks bad. YURI: Feels worse. That's what they wanted for your friend Fawkes. HOBBES: What? YURI: Not to kill him, just�to make him sick. Very, very sick. [Hobbes stares at Yuri as the scene changes to Fort Leavitt. Darien is on a stretcher, hooked up to an IV. ] DARIEN: I can walk. [Darien is wheeled into an operation room by two doctors. Claire walks into the room and is offered a sterilization mask.] CLAIRE: No, no, no, I'm already exposed. One of the doctors puts a mask over Darien's face. DOCTOR: Relax, son. It's just some oxygen. Breathe normally. [Darien looks at the doctor slowly, and his eyes widen. The second doctor picks up a hypodermic gun as the doctor takes off his mask to reveal Arnaud.] ARNAUD:I'm going to take that nasty gland right out of your head. [The hypodermic gun whirrs, and Claire cries out as she hits the floor. Darien raises his head, but can only gurgle, and looks at Arnaud dizzily. ] ARNAUD:Well, I'd say, "See you when you wake up", but since that's not going to happen, I'll just say, "goodbye". [Arnaud pushes Darien back onto the stretcher. Darien's eyes roll to the back of his head as the camera zooms out.] Fade to commercial. [The scene returns to Arnaud unrolling a set of surgical tools. Darien is lying face down, unconscious. Arnaud turns to the second doctor.] ARNAUD: Start the clock. [The second doctor clicks a stopwatch.] DOCTOR: Three minutes until the next security sweep. ARNAUD:Plenty of time to retrieve my property. Have the good Dr. Halliday grant us some privacy. [The second doctor walks to a security scanner next to the door. He holds a box up to one scanner, then holds a second one slightly away from another scanner.] SCANNER: (beeps) Retinal scan failed. Please stand closer. [The second doctor holds the box up directly against the scanner.] SCANNER: (beeps) Thank you. DARIEN: (VO) A dead guy named Samuel Johnson said that, "Disease begins that equality which death completes." I was finally about to become my brother's equal. [Arnaud selects a pair of clippers and raises it above Darien's head] ARNAUD: Moments like this, it makes it all worthwhile. DARIEN: (VO) But it seems disease had other plans for me. [Strands of sicksilver sprout out of Darien's hair. Arnaud sees this, and stops the clippers.] ARNAUD: What in the� [The second doctor walks over. ] DOCTOR: What's wrong? ARNAUD: You tell me. [The second doctor looks at the sicksilver.] DOCTOR: I don't know. Um, maybe your quicksilver gland has been affected by the influenza. ARNAUD: Are you telling me that the gland is sick? DOCTOR: Well, it seems that way. It's sort of� [Arnaud grabs the doctor, slams him into the wall, and pulls out a scalpel, which he holds to the doctor's throat.] ARNAUD: Look, okay, I don't need a sick gland, right? I need a healthy, fully operational one. DOCTOR: You're the quicksilver specialist, not me. Now, I couldn't model a vector to avoid infecting something I've never seen. You�can't blame me for the results. [Arnaud sighs, and stalks over to Darien. Arnaud grabs his hair and lifts his head up.] ARNAUD: This is all your fault, Fawkes. I should kill you for it. Hmm? [Arnaud slams his head down, and looks at the other doctor.] DOCTOR: Arnaud, we're off schedule, and we can't chance extraction. Let's just take him someplace else that� [The stopwatch beeps. Arnaud rips the stopwatch off the doctor and throws it into the wall. The scene moves to the MP station outside the fort. A Fort Leavitt ambulance is let out as Hobbes' van pulls in. AN MP walks over to the window. The scene then shifts to Dr. Lewicki, the Official, and Claire, inside the operating room]. LEWICKI: They're making a second sweep of the premises CLAIRE: It's too late. They're long gone. [Claire raises herself up on the gurney, rubbing the back of her head.] OFFICIAL: You didn't get a good look at either of their faces? CLAIRE: No. [Hobbes walks in.] HOBBES: Where's Fawkes? I gotta� [Hobbes stops, and looks around.] HOBBES: What's wrong with the Keep? OFFICIAL: Fawkes is gone. Kidnapped, vanished, right from under our noses. HOBBES: Already? OFFICIAL: Excuse me?! [Hobbes sighs, and rubs his face with his hands.] HOBBES: It's Arnaud. Arnaud. He's the only one who knew Fawkes would be here. CLAIRE: What are you talking about? HOBBES: We thought we were after Arnaud, right? CLAIRE: Right. HOBBES: Negative. Arnaud was after Fawkes. There are no bioweapons. The whole thing is just a big scam to make him sick. CLAIRE: He, he got Darien alive, alone, and in a hospital room. OFFICIAL: How the hell did he get access to this hospital? This secure hospital?! [The Official glares at Lewicki, who is still talking on the phone. ] HOBBES: Sir, with all due respect, Arnaud did infiltrate the I-Man project, and that was very heavily secured at that time. [The Official glares at Hobbes.] OFFICIAL: What? HOBBES: Well, I'm just saying, he's very good. [The Official continues to glare at Hobbes.] HOBBES: You know, he's not good. He's actually not good at all. He's bad. He's very�he's terrible. He's terrible. LEWICKI: What? Right. [Lewicki hangs up the phone, and turns to the Official.] LEWICKI: Access on this wing is controlled by thumbprint and retinal scanners. Security mainframe has logged a Dr. Jerome Halliday as the last person in here. He's the cuplrit. HOBBES: Negative. He's a victim. Check with your nurses. I'm sure nobody's seen him here all day. [Lewicki leaves the room.] OFFICIAL: Bobby, I need you to find Darien before it's too late. CLAIRE: I'm gonna go with you. (groans) [Hobbes moves over to Claire and helps her walk.] CLAIRE: Darien's still sick, and I don't trust Arnaud to take care of him. [The Official watches Hobbes and Claire leave.] OFFICIAL: No kidding. [The scene fades to a shot of Darien with a wet towel on his head. Birds are singing in the background. Darien is starting to regain consciousness. The camera shifts to Arnaud and Font, who are arguing.] FONT: What are we going to do? We can't just feed him chicken soup and Sudafed and hope our problems disappear. ARNAUD:Why not? FONT: This is a designer virus. It has been designed to eventually kill its host. Now, we're running out of time. [Darien looks up from the couch he is lying on, eyes closed.] DARIEN: Oh, man, I just had the worst nightmare. [Darien looks around and spots Arnaud.] DARIEN: Never mind. [Darien sinks back onto the couch.] FONT: We didn't think things through. ARNAUD: I'll be with you in a minute, Fawkes. I think everything through. FONT: No, you think things halfway through. You're a half scientist, Arnaud. You need someone else to do the work so you can take the credit, and now you've hoisted yourself on your own petard. [Arnaud pulls out a gun from his coat, and shoots Font once. He turns to Darien.] ARNAUD:It's a very effective way to win an argument. I suggest you try it sometime. DARIEN: I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but, uh, you are one sick bastard. ARNAUD:I'm a simple bastard, Fawkes. I just want one thing. And you're the sick one, remember? DARIEN: So, why don't you put me out of my misery, you know? I mean, look, if you really want me dead, why don't you just do it already, huh? Just, will you just do it, please? ARNAUD:Believe me, I'd love nothing more. But taking the gland out of a dead body is much riskier than taking it out of a sick one. DARIEN: Oh. Yeah, well, I guess why that explains why you were about to shoot me at my uncle's cabin. ARNAUD:Well, at the time, I had your uncle's quicksilver notes tucked under my arm. Now, without those, or the�project files, or�your brother�you're all that's left. [Darien glares at Arnaud for a moment.] DARIEN: All right. So why don't you just knock me out? You know, with a stun gun, baseball bat? You know, wh, what is it with all these complex plots, huh? I mean, what is it? Is it a Swiss thing? Is that what it is? ARNAUD:You know, I can't just walk up to you and knock you out with a baseball bat. There are variables. DARIEN: No, don't, don't defend it, please. ARNAUD:You could turn invisible, for one. DARIEN: Please. All right? Will you just admit it? ARNAUD:Admit what? DARIEN: You're ridiculous. You are, I mean, you, you join the Q-gland design team just so you can steal the design, huh? You make me think Kevin's alive so, what? I can lead you to some files that�hey, buddy, you could have found on your own with a little research. [The camera jumps to Arnaud, looking a little annoyed.] DARIEN: And then you give me the flu, cause what? What, so I can wind up in some hospital room and you can take the gland out? I mean, douche, Rube Goldberg has got nothing on you, pal. ARNAUD:I don't see you doing anything better. DARIEN: Oh, I got a plan. ARNAUD:Really. DARIEN: Yeah. My plan is to take you out, and when I do�it'll be real simple. [Arnaud chuckles, and leans in towards Darien.] ARNAUD:Why wait? [Darien looks at Arnaud for a second, then punches him in the side of the head. Arnaud falls to the floor as two goons pick up Darien and start punching him.] ARNAUD:Wait. [Arnaud picks himself up as the two goons let Darien drop to the floor. Arnaud stands up, as Darien hits the floor, coughing.] ARNAUD:Continue. DARIEN: Aw, crap. [The two goons start kicking Darien on the floor. The scene quicksilver fades to the van pulling in at Claire's house. Hobbes is driving while Claire is in the passenger seat.] HOBBES: Now hurry up, cause you're holding us up, now. CLAIRE: Five minutes! [Claire hands Hobbes a case of needles.] CLAIRE: Here, watch these very carefully. HOBBES: All right. What is this stuff anyways? CLAIRE: It's a sample of every antibody from Fort Leavitt's vaccination lab. Darien needs one of them, I just have to find out which. HOBBES: What do you need to go to your house for? CLAIRE: All my old viral vector research. [Claire gets out of the van.] HOBBES: You know, you're wasting time, Claire. We're not going to be able to heal him if we don't get it to him fast. [Claire opens the door to the van.] CLAIRE: Do you know what? Here, here, here. [Claire grabs the case of antibody samples.] CLAIRE: I'm going to take these, you go ahead, I'm going to catch a cab. HOBBES: What, now you're mad at me, now? Claire? CLAIRE: What? HOBBES: You want me to come up with you? CLAIRE: No. [Claire runs off.] HOBBES: All right. Fine. It's fine. I'll just wait here. [Claire walks into her house. She sets the case on the counter, and turns to see Arnaud holding Pavlov.] ARNAUD: Hello. [Claire looks at him, then at the door, which is guarded by a goon.] ARNAUD: I don't believe we've had the pleasure. CLAIRE: Well, the last time we were in a room together, you jammed a hypodermic gun in my neck. ARNAUD: Right. The work of my very rude colleague. We've since parted ways, which is what brings me here, actually. Isn't that right, Pavlov? [Arnaud scratches the dog under the chin.] ARNAUD: You see, it may not seem like it, but�we both want the same thing. CLAIRE: Doubt that. ARNAUD: Really? You don't want Fawkes to get better? CLAIRE: Just in time for you to cut him up? No. Not really. ARNAUD :Okay. I'm not very good at asking�for anything. But, I need your help, and I know that you want to help Fawkes, so, what I'm suggesting is that we work together, put aside our differences. Please. CLAIRE: Do I have a choice? ARNAUD:Of course, feel free to say no at any time. Speaking of time, (checks watch) he doesn't have much left. CLAIRE: You leave my dog here. [Arnaud looks at Pavlov, and smiles.] Fade to commercial. [The scene returns outside Claire's house, then moves to inside the house as Hobbes enters.] HOBBES: Claire? Oh, Claire? We playing hide and seek? [Hobbes looks at the security system by the door, which is smashed. Hobbes pulls out his gun, and moves softly next to the stairs. Pavlov comes down and looks at Hobbes.] HOBBES: Stay, pup. [Hobbes moves off as Pavlov looks on. The scene moves to Claire and Arnaud entering Arnaud's hacienda. Claire spots Darien and runs over, antibodies in hand.] CLAIRE: Hey, hey, hey. DARIEN: (slurred) Good morning. [Claire starts checking Darien out.] CLAIRE: You all right? DARIEN: Headache. [Claire looks at his tattoo and glances at Darien worriedly.] ARNAUD:,Come on, we've got a lot of work to do. [One of Arnaud's goons drags Claire off. The scene shifts to Arnaud's lab, where Claire walks over to a vial in the middle of the room. Arnaud come in and shuts the door behind her.] ARNAUD:,Forgive the mess [Claire turns around, a blue vial in hand]. CLAIRE: You've got counteragent. ARNAUD:,Yeah, I own the copyright. Now, tell me what you're doing to cure Fawkes. It's too late for a vaccine. CLAIRE: I don't need one. I'm going to feed antibodies directly into his immune system. ARNAUD:,You want to play remedy roulette with him? That's not very responsible. CLAIRE: There's a way to find the right one. ARNAUD:(snorts) Who do you think you are? Kevin Fawkes? [Claire stares at Arnaud.] ARNAUD: How? CLAIRE: Answer one question first. ARNAUD: You've got to be kidding me. CLAIRE: It's about counteragent. ARNAUD:(sighs) Still copying the recipe, are we? CLAIRE: I've made headway into the construct. ARNAUD: Of course. CLAIRE: It's very complex. ARNAUD: Naturally. CLAIRE: I'm not paying you a compliment. I need to know if the flu virus affects the base of the counteragent. [Arnaud plays with the vial of counteragent.] ARNAUD: Tell me, were you surprised to find that the base was organic? CLAIRE: Answer the question. ARNAUD: You know, you're dealing with a balance of toxic substances. One element out of place and� CLAIRE: (louder) Answer the question. ARNAUD: Ladies first. [The scene moves to Darien, still lying on the couch. The thugs are observing him.] THUG 1: He's getting more sick. His eyes are red. [Darien looks at the thug.] DARIEN: You know, that's a very good observation. Yeah. You must be the one they all write home about, huh? Gold star for Thuggo. [The thug crosses his arms, and looks at Darien.] DARIEN: Damn. You guys are big, huh? Yeah, but you know what they say. The bigger they are� [Darien sits up]. DARIEN: �Dumber they look. [The thug glares at Darien.] DARIEN: Yo, what's your name, sweet pea? THUG 1: (heavy German accent) Valt. DARIEN: (with fake German accent) Valt, Valt, Valt. That is your name, Valt? [Darien laughs and drops the accent. DARIEN: Hey, where ya from, Ikea? Yo! Yo mama was a futon. THUG 1: Hold your tongue. [The thug walks over to Darien.] DARIEN: Yeah? Why don't you hold it for me, bitch? [Darien kicks the thug in the groin, then kicks him away. The second thug gets up, and starts towards Darien.] DARIEN: Bring it on. [Darien widens his eyes, exposing the bloodshot eyes that indicate quicksilver madness.] [The scene shifts to Arnaud's lab, where the sounds of fighting can be heard clearly. Claire looks at Arnaud and raises her eyebrows.] CLAIRE: Well, now you'd better give me the answer for both our sakes. ARNAUD: Like I said before, you first. [Claire shakes her head.] CLAIRE: You are such a child. [Arnaud and Claire stare at each other for a moment.] CLAIRE: Do you have the original strain of the virus? ARNAUD: Yes. [Arnaud moves off to get the virus.] CLAIRE: You match the viral proteins of the original strain with the antibodies. Whichever one mimics the synthetic peptides must be the immunogen with the highest value. [Claire, getting visibly more agitated as she says this, spins towards Arnaud.] CLAIRE: (yells) You are certainly not Kevin Fawkes! ARNAUD:(sniffs) Certainly not. [Arnaud pulls out his gun and points it at Claire.] ARNAUD: By the way, say hello to him for me. [Darien throws the second thug into the door. Arnaud leaps back and points the gun at Darien. Darien knocks the gun out of his hands. He then grabs Arnaud by the collar.] DARIEN: Tag. You're dead. [Darien throws Arnaud up against the wall. Claire rushes over.] CLAIRE: Darien, wait! [Darien hits Claire with his arm, throwing her to the floor.] DARIEN: Why wait? [Darien turns back to Arnaud, who punches him in the face. Darien takes the punch, then looks at Arnaud. He then begins choking him, raising him up off the floor with one hand.] DARIEN: What comes around, goes around. Remember this? Huh? [Claire grabs a syringe and loads it with counteragent while Darien is distracted.] DARIEN: You gave me a little touch of this disease way before the flu. CLAIRE: Darien, Darien, I need Arnaud to help me cure you. DARIEN: He's a little busy right now. [Darien continues choking Arnaud, who is squeaking and gasping.] CLAIRE: If you kill him, you will not survive. DARIEN: Just so long as he goes first. CLAIRE: Fine, fine, fine, Kill him, b, but kill him later! Right now, you could, you could�you could trash his place! [Darien lets Arnaud drop. Arnaud gasps for breath as Darien turns to Claire and advances on her.] DARIEN: You do not tell me what to do. I am so sick of you manipulating me. Let me explain something for you. If I wanna trash his place� [Darien leans in towards Claire.] DARIEN: �Oh, I'll trash it. [Darien picks up a tray and hurls it out the window.] CLAIRE: There's, there's a really obnoxious sculpture in the foyer. Darien looks up, then heads back into the foyer. CLAIRE: If you don't give me the answer now, I swear, I will turn him loose on you again. [Arnaud smiles weakly.] ARNAUD: Counteragent won't be affected. You can piggyback a dose on the antigen, it'll spread quicker. CLAIRE: Where's the original strain? [Darien can be heard destroying things in the other room. Arnaud laughs weakly, and motions.] ARNAUD: Drawer. DARIEN: (from other room) Die, cuckoo clock, die! [Claire rushes over to the drawer.] CLAIRE: And after we are done here, we are going to talk about improving counteragent. [Arnaud gets up.] ARNAUD: Do me a favor. Keep him healthy for me. ]Arnaud runs and jumps out the window. Claire aims Arnaud's gun, but he jumps away before she can fire. She sighs, and pulls out a cell phone. She hits an autodial number, and raises the phone to talk.] CLAIRE: Hobbes, it's me. Darien's safe. We need you to come get us. Fade to commercial. [The scene returns to outside Arnaud's hacienda, where movers are carting away mounds of destroyed furniture. Hobbes and Claire are talking.] CLAIRE: I just don't see what you're trying to say here. HOBBES: I'm just saying that when I saw the wire was cut, I got worried, that's all. CLAIRE: Bobby, you know I can handle myself. HOBBES: Did I say you couldn't handle yourself? I know you can handle yourself. I didn't say that. I'm just saying, I, you know, I get a little�God, you look good in those pants. CLAIRE: Bobby! [Darien ducks under some tape and walks over to Claire and Hobbes.] DARIEN: Hey, I didn't know you guys were out back, huh? You got a little garage sale here, huh? CLAIRE: Okay, what are you doing here? You were meant to be at home, resting. DARIEN: What are you talking about? It's been a day and a half. Those little antibodies you gave me are working great. CLAIRE: Yes, well, you need to give your body time to clear itself out. DARIEN: Oh, I'm clear. [Claire looks at Darien, who lifts up his shirt. His midsection is invisible.] DARIEN: See? CLAIRE: Oh� HOBBES: Showoff. [Darien lets his shirt down and leans in.] DARIEN: Hey, so'd you guys find anything? HOBBES: Besides what you smashed? DARIEN: Sure. HOBBES: You know, I think our friend Arnaud wasn't considerate enough to leave us any clues. DARIEN: Come on, there's gotta be something here. Did you talk to those bodyguards? HOBBES: Hired muscle. They don't know anything. DARIEN: How about the lab? Did you check it? CLAIRE: Oh, it's way too small to be his main workshop. This place is more like Arnaud's holiday house. DARIEN: (sighs) Damn. HOBBES: What's the matter? DARIEN: I had him, man. HOBBES: Oh, you had him? DARIEN: I had him right here. [Darien points to his hands]. HOBBES: Right there in your hands, you had him, Joey, you had him. But, you got small hands. DARIEN: That's what I'm saying. HOBBES: What happened? DARIEN: Hey, (motions to Claire) talk to her. CLAIRE: Hey, hey, hey. I hate to remind you, but if it wasn't for Arnaud, you would still be sick right now, or worse. DARIEN: He got away. I am worse. HOBBES: Ah, don't worry. You'll get another shot. (imitating Marlon Brando) You'll get another shot at the ballpark. What does he get? A title shot, while you get a one-way ticket to Palookaville. [Claire walks around to Darien, and hold out a tongue depressor.] CLAIRE: Say ahh. DARIEN: What? CLAIRE: Now that you're here, I'm going to look you over. Say ahh. HOBBES: Ahh, ahh. CLAIRE: Say ahh. [Darien opens his mouth reluctantly]. DARIEN: (VO) A little old lady named Mother Teresa once said that the biggest disease isn't leprosy, or tuberculosis, but the feeling of being unwanted. See, I don't have that condition. Everybody wants a piece of me for something. But the next time I catch up with Arnaud, I'm gonna give him exactly what he wants: a piece of my mind. [The camera pans across the broken furniture to the cuckoo clock, as the bird pops out.] CUCKOO CLOCK: (distorted) Cuckoo�.. Fade to credits. StarvedChocobo Wyatt Smith Diseased |