Quietly the
confusion takes its toll,
More and more, I slowly lost self-control,
The words eat at my soul, No one here to console,
Me, no one shows their happy smile,
No one makes living worthwhile,
Love, it’s been awhile, ever since that first trial,
Now, I don't know what to watch, what to say,
Who to listen to, who to obey,
My life in disarray, today, everyday,
But the desire to end the pain,
These new profound thoughts I entertain,
No, here I will remain, from suicide I will refrain,
For there is still something I long for,
Those thoughts I will try to ignore,
Life I shall explore, distraught I'll be nevermore,
No, that isn't me talking, those aren't my words,
Someone my think different if overheard,
What ideas they inferred, would be quite absurd,
I need my love, I need my friends,
The ones who know what to recommend,
Whose hand extends, and will always make amends,
Of the faults I gave, and the mistakes I've made,
Whilst I hide behind my masquerade,
The people I evade, why I'm so afraid,
This mask must release, the hiding must cease,
Last night I fell to my knees,
And prayed for sorrow to decrease, but instead they increase,
Who I torturing me? Why do I go through this misery?
Wishing for life full of jubilee,
A guarantee, of love, a plea, to set me free,
This is what I wish; this is what I want,
I sit and read, don't see words, just the font,
Frail and gaunt, my body itself will haunt,
Until I know what to do, how to live,
I have but one life to give,
So who will I outlive, and who will I forgive,
Back to the grave I shall return,
My heart still yearns, my soul still burns,
But its not my turn, so this life, is now adjourned...
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